Villains of the Squared Circle (WF022)

 

VILLAINS OF THE SQUARED CIRCLE (WF022)

Like I had mentioned on ROWDY RODDY PIPER’S GREATEST HITS, the WWF had hit on a revolutionary concept. Showcasing the top babyface stars was nothing new in wrestling. From Verne Gage acting in The Wrestler, to Jerry Lawler being all over Memphis to WWF’s own Hulkamania. However, what all the regional territories failed to capitalize on was the other side of the spectrum. You didn’t see a Nick Bockwinkel t-shirt or video tape. You saw Lawler but was there a spotlight on Bill Dundee? There was no 4 Horseman tape in the Carolina’s. The WWF was the first to truly market and specialize the heels as well as the faces. We saw Roddy Piper get his own tape and some of the heel managers were highlighted in THE AMAZING MANAGERS but this one, we got em all. This tape is to showcase the villains both past and present that ran roughshod over the WWF. Will it be good to highlight the bad? Let’s find out. Cue the 1985 Coliseum Video opening and Mean Gene Okerlund is our host today….scratch that. He introduces guest hosts Bobby “The Brain” Heenan, King Kong Bundy and Big John Studd. Heenan says Okerlund to keep his mouth shut. Studd says he’s not a villain, he’s a very aggressive wrestler. Bundy says they’re winners. Okerlund and Heenan go back and forth and Studd says Okerlund is gonna get the splash before the tape is over. Okerlund runs down what we’re about to see as the truo howl with laughter. We then go to our first bout.
Match 1

Jake “The Snake” Roberts vs Scott McGee

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Alfred Hays and Ernie Ladd

April 22, 1986 in Madison Square Garden is the date and venue for this non-legendary squash match. Okerlund in the voiceover says Roberts is the newest heel in the WWF and Heenan scoffs at the terminology Okerlund uses to describe him. The bell sounds and Roberts is in the purple tights with green snake imprints while McGee is in the red trunks. Roberts unload with right hands and rams McGee into the corner. Studd says he’s not afraid of snakes and Bundy says there are no asterisks in the record books, only says whether they won or lost. Okerlund sends it to the actual broadcast team as Roberts decks McGee with a right hand. Roberts goes for the snake in the bag but then delivers a stomach breaker. Roberts smiles as he rams McGee’s face into the ground twice and slithers around. Ladd asks Monsoon about Miguel Perez Sr and Monsoon says his son is wrestling now. Yeah, 10 years later he’d be one of the founding fathers of Los Borriquas. Back to live action, Roberts counters a running roll up but turns around into a dropkick. Roberts runs into a snap suplex and McGee wastes no time with a gut-wrench suplex and a pinfall attempt for 1….2..no. Jake slithers out of the ring as Monsoon and Ladd scoffs. McGee chases him back into the ring where he hiptosses Jake. A kneedrop stuns Jake and a pinfall attempt gets two. Jake begs off but McGee drags him into the center of the ring. McGee stomps Jake in the stomach then takes him down. Monsoon says Jake landed on the external occipital protuberance area as Ladd says “you lost me at the last red light.” McGee misses a knee drop and Jake hits the arm wrench/short arm clothesline combo. Jake goes for a scoop slam but Scott rolls through and goes for another running roll-up. Jake counters and then catches Scott with the D-D-T! Jake taunts the crowd as he makes the cover..1…2….3 and this ones over. Jake immediately goes for the bag where he unleashes the giant python Damien. Ladd asks why they would let Jake bring a snake out to begin with. Alfred marvels at the snake as Fink gets in the ring long enough to announce Jake the winner before skedaddling. Jake sicks Damien on McGee as Monsoon says snakes bite. Yeah, in about 5 years ask Randy Savage how it feels. After a few minutes of torture the crowd starts chanting Hogan as the announcers scoff. In terms of match quality, it was a 4 minute squash so no sense squawking about that. Mainly it was to highlight how devious Jake was to sick a live python on people. It worked tremendously.
Time of match: 4:02

Winner: Jake Roberts by pinfall
Moving right along to the next match
Match 2

Tor Kamata vs Pat Patterson

Commentator: Gorilla Monsoon

The Showdown at Shea on August 9, 1980 was known for the Bruno/Zybysko main event with the Hogan/Andre undercard but this match was apart of it too. We all know who Pat Patterson is, but who the hell is Tor Kamata? He was known as Mr. Moto in the AWA and regional territories where he feuded with Freddie Blassie. His real name is McRonald believe it or not. He was given the name Tor Kamata based off Tomas De Torquemada of the Spanish Inquisition. Guess who gave him that name, Hawaiian promoter Sir Ed Francis, father of New England Patriots tight end Russ who competed in the WRESTLEMANIA 2 battle royal. Three years prior to this match Kamata was used as a heel to get Bob Backlund over, grooming Bob for his feud with Superstar Billy Graham. Kamata attacks Patterson at the bell who Pearl Harbors Patterson as the bell rings. Kamata is in the long black tights and white stripe while Patterson is in the standard black trunks. Monsoon calls him “the big Jap” as Kamata levels Patterson with a dropkick. Try getting away with saying that now. Kamata goes up to the top rope but misses the big splash. Patterson goes up to the top rope and drops a knee. Patterson sheds his ring jacket who stomps away on Tor in the corner. At the time Pat Patterson was 39 and Kamata was 43 years old. Just goes to show age doesn’t make a difference in wrestling sometimes. Patterson whips Kamata in the corner and backdrops him. Monsoon says he went down like yesterday’s garbage. Monsoon brings up Patterson’s heel past as well. Kamata reaches into his tights for the salt and throws it…missing Patterson completely and nailing referee Dick Kroll with it instead. IDIOT! Kroll calls for the bell and this one is over. Patterson rallies with right hands and a scoop slam. Patterson goes for the pinfall and Kroll actually counts a 1 but Kamata kicks out and bails. We go to the replay of Kroll getting nailed and we cut here. Absolutely no idea why this match was included on this tape since Kamata was never a top heel. Maybe Vince was mad at Dick Kroll one day and decided to throw this match into the tape to get back at him for something. Who knows.
Time of match: 2:05

Winner: Pat Patterson by DQ

 

Moving right along to match number three.

 

Match 3

George “The Animal” Steele vs Pedro Morales for the WWWF Heavyweight Championship

Commentator: Vince McMahon

June 30, 1973 in Madison Square Garden saw a different Animal that modern fans know and love. Before Steele became the loveable goofball in the mid 80’s he was a savage heel for many years prior. Here, he takes on the champion. Both are in their standard gear. Morales and Steele trade blows as Steele nails Pedro with a hidden foreign object the ref can’t find. Heenan, Bundy and Studd make fun of Steele in the voiceover saying he’s no longer worth anything since he turned face. Studd “He’s not one of US anymore.” Meanwhile back to 73, Steele stomps away on Morales, send him off and scoop slams him. Steele catches Morales in the throat with the object as the fans scoff. Steele tells the ref he didn’t do anything as he goes to bite the turnbuckle. Meanwhile Morales lands two left handed punches that have the Garden rocking. The camera focuses on the left hand of Steele as Morales backs him around the ring. Morales stuns Steele with an arm drag and Steele retreats to the corner. Morales lands a forearm as we get a TAPE EDIT to Steele dropping Morales with a big punch. The ref once again checks Steele but can’t find anything. George rams Morales into the steel ringpost as screams “yesssss” to the irate crowd. Steele rams him a second time as the ref tries to push Steele away. George rams Morales a third time but the 4th attempt is blocked. Morales rams Steele into the ring post as the crowd goes nuts. Morales rams him into each post and Steele blades. Morales rallies with lefts and rights as flashbulbs go off. Steele begs off and Morales bites the forehead. Morales continues to rally with left hands as the referee checks Steele’s head and calls for the bell. Steele protests but the ref raises Pedro’s arm in victory. George then pulls the foreign object out and waffles Pedro with it. George continues to pound away but Pedro backs Steele away with lefts before he steals the object. Pedro chases Steele to the back as the crowd cheers. Steele runs back out after the announcer gives the news to the crowd but we cut here. As a scientific match, it sucked monkey fuck. In terms of insanity, realism and storytelling, that was awesome. I would have loved to have been in the Garden that night and feel the buzz as Morales tried to counter the “foreign object” of the Animal. Steele was a loveable face, but he was a great, savage heel in his earlier days.
Time of match: 8:16

Winner: Pedro Morales by stoppage (still WWWF champion)

 

Continuing along to match 4
Match 4

“Big Cat” Ernie Ladd vs Andre the Giant

Commentator: Vince McMahon

April 26, 1973 in Madison Square Garden saw the battle of the giants. Ernie Ladd was a legit 6 foot 9 and had played on the 1963 American Football League Champion San Diego Chargers during his football career as a defensive lineman. Then he shattered racial barriers by becoming one of the first black top heels. Most black wrestlers up to that point were loveable fan favorites such as Bearcat Wright, Bobo Brazil and Thunderbolt Patterson…and here comes Ladd as a heel. Andre is in the black trunks and Ernie in the light blue. We’re joined in progress with Andre kicking Ladd around the ring. Andre lands a big punch as Heenan tries to say the taped thumb on Ladd’s hand was 100% legit. Andre hammers away with a big headbutt as Ladd sells it like his head was on fire. Another headbutt drops Ladd into the corner. The ref tells Andre to back off as Ladd reaches for something in his tights. He nails Andre with the big thumb twice, dropping him to the mat. By the way, this was the smaller, leaner 26 year old Andre that could still bump and move around. They’re about equal size here height wise and Andre does have a weight advantage. Andre gets his left arm caught in the top rope and Ernie goes to town with boots. Andre frees himself and Ladd continues t land big right hands including a headlocked punch. Andre then grabs Ernie’s hand and punches him with his own taped thumb. Vince calls it a taste of his own medicine. Andre whips Ernie off and backdrops him. Andre goes for the big splash but Ernie slides out of the way. Ernie bails to the outside and retreats to the back, earning a count-out win for Andre. Vince says Ernie chickened out as the crowd boos Ernie then cheers Andre. That’s one way to keep your heel heat without doing a job. Once again, catch as catch can went out the window but the crowd was still into it with Andre trying to overcome the heel tactics of Ladd. Always great to see both of them, but even better to see the mobile Andre.
Time of match; Joined in progress

Winner: Andre the Giant by count-out
Moving along to match number five
Match 5

Captain Lou Albano vs Gorilla Monsoon

Commentator: Vince McMahon

What a treat. On the same card as Pedro/Steele from earlier was Captain Lou going one on one with Monsoon himself on June 30, 1973. Lou would turn 40 a month later while Gorilla clocked in at 36. Albano was a little lighter In 1973 as Monsoon looks the same as always. Both are in standard gear as Monsoon doesn’t want to wait for the announcer or referee’s instructions. Albano begs off before he takes his ring jacket off. Big John Studd in the voiceover says we’ll be seeing big, giant jellyrolls. Bundy says they’re broken down, old windbags which is ironic as Studd was older at that time (38) than Monsoon was during this match. Albano is built at 275 pounds, Monsoon 401 pounds. The ref tries to hold Monsoon back as he checks him for objects. The ref checks Albano who caters to the irate crowd. The bell rings and immediately Albano bails. He does this a few times before Monsoon lands some forearms in the corner before Lou counters with an eye gouge. Another one follows before Lou hits a third. A fourth one has Monsoon shambles around as the ref asks Albano what he’s up to. Albano continues to work the eye gouge before landing a boot. Monsoon counters with a slap and an eye gouge of his own. Vince “Turnabout is fair play” Monsoon sends Albano off and drops him with a big chop. Two overhand chops has Albano down. Monsoon then chops Albano over the top rope. Albano runs away and Monsoon gets the count out win. The crowd cheers as the ref raises Monsoon’s hand in victory. We go to the replay where Albano flies over the top and bails. Well that was a waste of time. They were better off showing Albano’s victory over Tony Angelo from THE LIFE AND TIMES OF CAPTAIN LOU ALBANO. Instead they showed a minute of Albano eye gouging before running away. Sure he was a villain, but he could have been showcased better than that.
Time of match: 1:43

Winner: Gorilla Monsoon by count-out
No nonsense, onto match 6

Match 6

Andre the Giant and Chief Jay Strongbow vs Blackjack Lanza and Stan “The Man” Stasiak

Commentator: Vince McMahon

We’re still in 1973 as this was from November 12, 1973 in Madison Square Garden. Its also the Coliseum Video debuts of the former WWWF Champion Stasiak and one half of the blackjacks, Lanza. Stasiak’s physique wasn’t really that impressive but he was a vicious heel and would be challenging Pedro Morales less than 3 weeks after this match for the heavyweight title. Stasiak was the first to use the heart punch as a finisher. Lanza and Blackjack Mulligan terrorized the territories as big, bruising cowboy heels throughout the 70’s and early 80’s. Stasiak wants no part of Strongbow so he bails to the apron only for Jay to head scissor him into the ring. Stasiak goes to bail but Jay is snap mared in. An arm drag stuns Stasiak and we get a TAPE EDIT. Stasiak is in the long black tights with red strpe, Strongbow is in the multi-colored trunks. Andre has the blue trunks on, Lanza in standard gear. Stasiak sends Strongbow off the ropes and…rakes the eyes. Stan makes the tag to Lanza and we cut here. Well that was worthless….didn’t even get to see the ending. What the hell were they thinking? At least show the ending. What’s the point of showcasing heels if Lanza hadn’t been in the ring yet?
Time of match: Joined in progress

Winners: Unknown
I dread to think what comes next if they refused to show the ending to that one.
Match 7

Don “The Magnificent” Muraco with Captain Lou Albano vs Special Delivery Jones

Commentator: Vince McMahon and Pat Patterson

Before we get to the Jones match, we’re joined in progress for a quick highlight of Muraco heaving Pedro Morales over the top rope to the outside. Okerlund calls Muraco strange as Bundy, Studd and Heenan praise Don and insult Okerlund. Jones is in the red trunks and Muraco the standard. Jones drops Muraco with a series of arm drags that has Muraco bailing to the outside. Vince says a win over Muraco would make Jones a top contender to the title. Which title Vince? SD Jones hits the sunset flip we see in the 85 Intro before every tape for 1….2…no. SD goes back to the headlock before Muraco counters with a back breaker. Muraco misses a Vader Bomb and SD goes back to the headlock. Patterson praises Jones for his patience. Muraco powers out of the headlock but Jones headbutts Don in the back. A few right hands stun Don and Jones goes back to the headlock takeover. Patterson “Very nice” Vince “The headlock is a defensive type of a hold, not an offensive.” Good call Vince. Muraco gets the upper hand with rights but SD lands left jabs to stun Muraco and a headbutt. Muraco whips SD into the corner where SD goes for the bodypress…only Muraco counters with a powerslam. Muraco hooks the leg and the ref counts the pinfall like in the 85 Opening. Both highlights from this match were used in the montage, nice. Anyway Muraco gets the pinfall victory as Vince says “How about that?” We go back to the instant replay. Good victory by Muraco and its nice to see where the opening montage comes from sometimes.
Time of match: Joined in progress

Winner: Don Muraco by pinfall
We go straight to an episode of TNT where Muraco cuts a promo. Its the same exact one he cut in RICKY THE DRAGON STEAMBOAT except its clipped. Don says there’s no more titles to win and he runs the darkside. Vince says there’s only one way to go, down. Muraco makes fun of Ricky Steamboat saying he likes fat broads (ironic given Bonnie was a looker in her day). Muraco “Put that in your pipe and smoke it brotha”. We go right to the next match after.

Match 8

Ricky Steamboat vs Mr. Fuji

This is the same match from Ricky The Dragon Steamboat only this is just a clip. We’re at the part where Fuji has the nerve hold, Vince calls Fuji a world class wrestler. Steamboat does the fade-then-revive routine. Ricky rakes the eyes and chops Fuji down. Ricky goes upstairs and catches Fuji with the flying crossbody for 1….2..nope, Fuji kicks out. Ricky goes for the big splash but Fuji gets the knees up. Bruno says that’s the first time he’s seen someone kick out of that and Vince says Ricky didn’t hook the leg. Ricky rolls through a back suplex, rolls up Fuji and gets the 1..2….3 to win the match. Steamboat celebrates on the outside as a little girl jumps the guardrail and runs toward Ricky only for her to stop and turn around. Steamboat goes to leave but Don Muraco runs out and hits Ricky in the back with a stool. The stool breaks in half as Fuji runs out and picks up the other half. They continue to beat on Ricky before leaving. Vince calls them dastardly. Now I see why they cut the match short, to show the extracurricular activity by Muraco. What a heel.
Time of match: 4:06

Winner: Ricky Steamboat by pinfall
Next up are “Rowdy” Roddy Piper highlights. Once again we get a clipped showing of Piper’s Pit where he attacks Jimmy Snuka. Then we get the clip of him slapping Alfred Hays across the face on TNT. Then we get a clip of Piper attacking Frankie Williams on Piper’s Pit. Then we get a clip of Piper and Lou Albano exchanging unpleasantries showcased on Albano’s tape. Only this time its extended as Albano flicks Piper on the nose. Piper responds by punching Albano over the couch and calling him a fat piece of garbage. Then we get his exchange with Mr. T that set up Wrestlemania1. All of these highlights are available on his personality profile tape. Then we get some clips of Piper in the ring. Only before that, Bundy tells Okerlund to shut up for calling him a jellyroll. Ha! Studd “Piper is a great friend of ours.”The clips of Piper and Schultz beating up Andre, Piper’s match with Snuka from St. Louis, Piper and Orton against Snuka and Tonga Kid. Once again, every single clip here was from another tape. It would continue with our next match.
Match 9

“Macho Man” Randy Savage (with Miss Elizabeth) vs Tito Santana for the WWF Intercontinental Championship

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Jesse “The Body” Ventura

Wonderful, it’s the exact same match from WWF GREATEST MATCHES. We’re clipped well into the match where both Savage and Santana are down in the ring. Santana goes for the figure four, but Savage counters it by kicking him off. Randy slides to the ring apron to pull out something from his tights. He swings and misses and Tito goes for a back suplex, however Randy clocks Santana with the object on the way down. Randy crawls over on top of Tito and Davis gets down 1……2….THREE AND WE GOT A NEW CHAMPION. Thinking quickly, Savage tosses the piece of steel to the outside as Davis never saw it. Its official, the Macho Man is your new Intercontinental Champion. Savage limps to the back as Monsoon scoffs at the blatent cheating by the Macho Man, Ventura says it’s brilliant. The camera shows the cold roll of steel Savage clobbered Tito with before going to the replay. Monsoon continues to complain as we cut here. Nice to include Savage on this tape but the constant clipping is getting on my nerves now.

Time of match: Clipped for the tape

Winner: Savage by pinfall (New WWF Intercontinental Champion)
Rolling right along, its time for Terry Funk.
Match 9

Aldo Marino vs “Terrible” Terry Funk

Commentators: Vince McMahon and Bruno Sammartino

This was Funk’s WWF debut match on the June 17, 1985 edition of Championship Wrestling. The referee is the infamous Rita Marie which I’ll get to later. Okerlund says in the voiceover the reason the match is on here is because of the attendant putting Funk’s hat on his head. Bundy says the guy deserved it for ruining the hat. Studd says he could care less about Marino or Mel Phillips and Funk did a good job. Basically what happened was Mel had too much stuff in his hands so he put the hat on his head in order to carry everything. Vince laughs but Funk gets enraged and beats the crap out of Mel. Vince scoffs as Funk throws Marino out of the ring. Funk continues to beat the daylights out of Phillips. Marino tries to help out but Funk sends him out of the ring again. Funk then tosses Phillips out for good as Vince continues to complain. Sammartino “That’s Terry Funk, he’s got some reputation.” The security guards literally carry Mel out of the arena as Funk goes to work on Marino with left hands and chops in the corner. Funk drops Marino and stomps on him as Rita Marie admonishes him. Funk heaves Marino through the ropes to the outside as Funk hits the floor himself and goes to attack a fan. Marino staggers back to the ring where Funk gets whipped to the buckle. Aldo then heaves Funk to the floor. Marino hits a dropkick that sends Funk over the top to the outside. Back inside Funk delivers a back suplex to quell the momentum. Funk kicks the guy in the head and snap suplexes him. Funk goes for the spinning toe hold and applies it. Marino gives it up and Funk is the winner. Funk goes to the outside and yells at the irate crowd and we cut here. Why was Rita Marie infamous? Several years later she went on the Geraldo Rivera show and claimed Vince raped her in a limousine. Why it took her 6 years to come out with it was partially the reason nobody ever thought much of it. Did it happen? Who knows. What DID happen is Funk beat the crap out of Mel Phillips…and it sure was funny.
Time of match: 4:05

Winner: Terry Funk by submission
Can we we keep the momentum going in match ten?
Match 10

Corporal Kirchner vs The Iron Sheik (with Classy Freddie Blassie and Nikolai Volkoff)

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Alfred Hays and Ernie Ladd

After Kirchner dispatched Nikolai Volkoff at Wrestlemania 2, Sheik got the next crack at him on April 22, 1986 at Madison Square Garden. This was on the same card as Roberts vs McGee at the beginning of this tape. Sheik is in the yellow trunks with Kirchner in his standard gear. Kirchner hands his hat and American flag to Mel Phillips and does NOT attack him like Funk did earlier. The Iron Sheik DOES attack Kirchner as he gets to the ring still with his turban and robe on. Sheik whips Kirchner off and clotheslines him. Sheik chokes Kirchner with the head piece as Ladd notices the bell never rang. Sheik sheds the robe, whips Kirchner off and backdrops him as the bell finally rings. Sheik spits on Kirchner and caters to the irate crowd. Shiek gives the crowd the arm and the elbow as Hays says Sheik has no dignity. Monsoon brings up the world and tag title reigns of Sheik as Kirchner leapfrogs him and scoop slams him. Kirchner drops an elbow, drags Sheik to the corner and rams him ballsack first into the ring post, ow. Kirchner punches and headbutts the Sheik. Kirchner delivers a snap suplex then covers for 1…2…nope. A gut wrench suplex is followed by another cover for a nearfall. Kirchner misses a dropkick just as Ladd praises him. Sheik stops away then delivers a gut wrench of his own. The cover only gets a deuce and Kirchner is met with a kick to the head. Sheik goes for the abdominal stretch as Monsoon says he doesn’t have it synched in properly. Kirchner hiptosses Shiek and drops a knee….but misses the elbow drop. Sheik whips the corporal off and he goes for the sunset flip, but only gets a two count. Sheik whips Kirchner off but he gets kicked in the head this time. Sheik begs off but then sends Kirchner to the floor where Volkoff whacks Kirchner with Blassie’s cane. The ref counts to 10 and calls for the bell. Volkoff tosses Kirchner in the ring and they double team Kirchner. Sheik loads up the boot and kicks Kirchner in the chest. Volkoff goes to town with right hands until Kirchner tries to fight back. He goes outside and grabs a chair, which causes The Unamericanz to bail. Nice to see The Unamericanz and Freddie Blassie showcased.
Time of match: 6 minutes

Winner: Iron Sheik by count-out
As we head towards the end, now its time to highlight our three co-hosts. We begin with the Manager of the Year ceremony highlighted in Amazing Managers. I’ll just repost. King Kong Bundy and Big John Studd stand guard outside the ring while Bobby Heenan, Captain Lou and Hillbilly Jim stand next to the trophy with “Mean” Gene Okerlund our MC for the evening. Okerlund says the WWF has received one million votes and thanks the fans but Heenan grabs the mic. Heenan reels off the heel managers and says they all gave up their votes for Heenan to win. Added with Heenan’s votes alone, Heenan gets 519,711 votes. Bobby proclaims himself the manager of the year and grabs the trophy. Hillbilly Jim asks how many votes he has and Okerlund answers he has 316,428 votes. He asks how many Lou has and 314,166 is the total. Jim then gives up his votes to Lou which means…oh yes…CAPTAIN LOU ALBANO has won the 1985 WWF Manager of the Year award. Heenan goes beserk as Jim congratulates Captain. Heenan then nails Albano with the trophy as Okerlund hightails it out of there. Studd and Bundy hit the ring and suddenly Jim is down 2 against 1. Studd tackles Jim and Bundy splashes him again and again like we saw with Andre earlier in the tape. Heenan smashes the trophy. Bundy splashes Jim again but finally Cousin Junior and Uncle Elmer make their appearance. The Heenan family bail to the back as the hillbillies tend to Jim and Albano. Great way to maintain heel heat by Heenan’s crew.

Next is the attack on Andre the Giant by Bundy and Studd also highlighted on Wrestling’s Amazing Managers.
Match 11

Andre the Giant vs “Big” John Studd with Bobby “The Brain” Heenan

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Jesse “The Body” Ventura

We’re joined in progress as Studd and Andre are locked up. Studd works over the left arm as Andre grabs the hair and headbutts him. Another headbutt stuns Studd but John counters a backdrop by dropping the giant with a kick to the head. Studd drops two elbows as Heenan hops up on the apron with a pair of scissors. He hands Studd the scissors but Andre grabs Studd’s wrist and bites it. Andre headbutts and chops Studd then kicks Heenan who attempts to retrieve the scissors. Andre punches him out of the ring and grabs the scissors. He grabs Studd, punches him and slams him to the mat. He goes to cut Studd’s hair as Ventura scoffs….but have no fear Jesse for Bundy is here. King Kong Bundy makes his way to the ring and nails Andre just as he’s finished cutting a strand of hair off. Bundy repeatedly nails Andre with forearms as Studd gathers his bearings. Andre tries to fight back but Studd tackles him to the ground, allowing Bundy to land a big splash. Studd continues to hold the legs and Bundy splashes Andre again….and again. The ref tries to get Bundy out of there but to no avail as Heenan whips Bundy who splashes Andree for a 4th time. Cousin Junior, Rick McGraw, The Killer Bees and Lanny hit the ring to save Andre. Studd is irate at Andre cutting a bit of his hair as Bundy and Heenan try to calm him down in the entrance way. Bundy was fast becoming a monster heel and this match is what set up the big Saturday Night’s Main Event showdown between Andre and Hogan teaming against Bundy and Studd.

Time of match: Joined in progress

Winner: Andre the Giant by DQ
Next we’re shown the highlight of King Kong Bundy’s attack on Hulk Hogan which set up Wrestlemania 2. Hogan was wrestling The Magnificent Muraco when Bobby Heenan accosted Hogan leading to Hogan attacking The Brain. Bundy hit the ring and beat up Hogan, avalanching him a few times in the corner with the aid of Muraco. Bundy even threw the referee to the outside to boot. Muraco drags Hogan to the center of the ring and holds him down as Bundy delivers a big splash. Muraco turns Hogan over and Bundy hits another splash. Bundy spits on Hogan as we cut here. More dastardly tactics which was the point of the tape. Now we head to the final match on the tape….which was previously covered on ANDRE THE GIANT.
Match 12
Andre the Giant and Special Delivery Jones vs “Big” John Studd and Ken Patera (with Bobby Heenan)
Commentators: Vince McMahon and Bruno Sammartino
Can we get anymore stock footage? I swear 90% of this tape is highlights previously featured on other tapes. Anyway, December 15, 1984 was the date for this infamous moment. Studd in the voiceover praises Patera who’s “not with us at the moment but still in the family” meaning Patera was in jail at the time for real. Okerlund tells Studd he stucks as a barber and Heenan tells him to shut up. Back to the match itself, Andre teams with mid-card jobber Jones to take on the Heenan Family members. Ken’s got the bleach blonde hair and Olympic singlet as Andre wears his Wrestlemania 1 tights (which wasn’t for another 3 ½ months). Jones starts out with former IC champ Patera. Jones leaps over Patera and hooks him arm for the big drag. Andre tags in and wrenches the arm then headbutts it. Jones tags in with an axehandle to the arm before flipping him over. Ken gets his arm free and executes a backbreaker before tagging in Studd. John delivers a series of forearms then floors Jones with a back elbow smash. Studd puts the boots to him then tags in Patera who picks up where Jones left off. Patera continues to slug away but a backdrop attempt earns a kick to the face. Jones hits a headbutt that sends Ken into the face corner where Andre tags in. Patera backdrops Jones over the top to the concrete floor as Andre stalks Ken in the ring. Andre pounds on Ken in the corner then ass bumps him a few times. Patera gets a knee to the back then delivers a forearm to the back of the head. Patera holds Andre for an interfering Studd and they both pound away on the giant. Both men are able to slam Andre together then they both put the boots to him. Studd holds Andre down as Patera scales the second rope for a kneedrop. The ref calls for the bell as Patera and Studd continue to punch and kick at the fallen giant. They trade dropping elbows before Patera holds Andre down for Bobby Heenan to toss a pair of scissors to Studd. Studd proceeds to cut Andre’s trademark afro. The referee makes no attempt to stop the two heels as Patera drops Andre. Studd continues to cut the hair as the fans pelt the ring with garbage. Heenan gets in the ring and kicks Jones out of the ring. Vince says they’re raping Andre of his dignity. Try getting away with saying that now. Heenan, Andre and Patera celebrate with chunks of Andre’s hair as the heels bail to the back. We go to the replay of Patera using his legitimate Olympic strength as Studd cuts the hair. Short match but fun for historical purposes. Andre had a big afro for his entire career but would wrestle the final years with short/medium length hair.

Time of match: 3:44
Winners: Andre the Giant and SD Jones by DQ
The credits roll and this one is history. Before we go, its time for the previews. Monsoon shills BEST OF THE WWF VOLUME 8, MACHO MAN RANDY SAVAGE AND ELIZABETH and MOST EXPLOSIVE TNT SHOW. As for now, that was an average tape. They had to cram years and years of heels into a 75 minute VHS tape. Nowadays this would be a 2 disc blu-ray with loads of extras, promos and footage. Can’t fault 1986 technology for its time period. The action ranged from decent to hot so no sense squawking about that. The only complaint I have is most of the footage was from previous Coliseum Video tapes so there was barely anything new, but then again, not everyone has all the tapes so they could be seeing this for the first time. As a standalone highlights tape, its worth a look. I give it 4 out of 5 despite the cram job. The next tape after this is BRUNO SAMMARTINO: WRESTLING’S LIVING LEGEND so I’ll see everyone there.

Wrestlemania 2 (WF021)

After the outstanding success that was WRESTLEMANIA shown on closed circuit television, Vince figured pay per views were the thing of the future, unfortunately his debut in 1985, WRESTLING CLASSIC ultimately bombed. This however would be his first real test, as for some peculiar reason he decided to show Wrestlemania in 3 separate venues across the country. The first portion would be held in New York, the second in Chicago and the third in Los Angeles. Now with 3 venues, the announce team was spread thin so they had guest commentators. New York would be Vince himself and Susan St James, the wife of NBC head honcho Dick Ebersol (which broadcasted Saturday Night’s Main Event). Chicago would be Mean Gene Okerlund, Gorilla Monsoon and Cathy Lee Crosby, the wife of Washington Redskins star QB Joe Theismann (who’s leg was so badly mangled he couldn’t even be in the battle royal). Los Angeles would be Jesse “The Body” Ventura, Lord Alfred Hays and Elvira….yes that Elvira. The Coliseum Video version opens with Mean Gene shilling the action for about 5 minutes until we get started. I should point out the original video is only 2 hours long while the Wrestlemania 97 Boxset version is 3 hours long. I’ll be doing the 3 hour version. Obviously the original Coliseum Video version had to drastically edit their stuff, I feel bad for the folks living around that time period.

APRIL 7, 1986

NEW YORK PORTION

NASSAU COLISEUM

UNIONDALE, NY

Commentators:  Vince McMahon and Susan St James

After a beautiful rendition of America the Beautiful by Ray Charles we are sent to an interview with Lou Duva, “Rowdy” Roddy Piper and “Cowboy” Bob Orton. Duva hypes up Piper as a better heavyweight prospect than anyone else at the time….which actually isn’t as farfetched as it seems, other than Mike Tyson and Trevor Berbick the division SUCKED in 1986. Anyway Piper cuts a promo in a very high pitched voice saying if Mr T knocks him out, he’ll retire from boxing, wrestling, tiddlywinks and dating girls. He also says you’ll never see him paint himself black, 4 years after this at Wrestlemania he did the exact thing he said he’d never do. Anyway, on to Susan and Vince to get things rolling.

Match 1

“Mr. Wonderful” Paul Orndorff vs “The Magnificent” Don Muraco (with Mr. Fuji)

The storyline here was Orndorff had befriended Hogan since last Wrestlemania, and when Muraco and Bundy double-teamed Hogan prior to Wrestlemania, Orndorff vowed revenge for the Pearl Harbor job. The production for this event sucked so bad they had the pre-recorded comments played DURING THE MATCH as opposed to before. They compare physiques as the bell sounds before a test of strength solves nothing. Orndorff works a headlock before running into a scoop slam by Muraco. Orndorff counters with a nip-up and a slam of his own then makes fun of Mr Fuji (with the derby hat) in a racist manner before giving him the arm and the elbow much to the crowd’s delight. Muraco knees Orndorff in the corner but Paul reverses a whip and hits a backdrop/armdrag combo before applying an arm-bar. Muraco walks on the second rope to armdrag Orndorff but Paul holds on. Muraco’s sweating profusely even though the match is about 2 minutes into it. Orndorff continues to work over the left arm and shoulder as Vince says this is the first time they’ve ever wrestled….hmm. Susan says Orndorff is applying ancient chinese torture techniques….um, yeah. Muraco counters with a samoan drop and a right hand then rams Paul into the top turnbuckle. Orndorff ralies before they both slowly topple to the floor. They beat each other on the outside until the ref counts to 10 and the match is over. The crowd is PISSED at the double-countout and chant bullshit, Vince “The crowd certainly doesn’t like the outcome of this!” Vince sends it to the ring for the official announcement which never comes, so he goes to the back for an interview with Mr T and his entourage.

Time of Match: 4:34

Winners: No one:  Double count-out

Mr T along with boxing legend Smokin Joe Frazier and midget lesson Haiti Kid rants and for whatever reason, the cameras are filming this as Howard Finkel is announcing the results of the previous match. Told you the production values for this were non-existant. Mr T says he’s gonna beat the crap out of Piper. Anyway on to the next match….
Match 2

George “The Animal” Steele vs “Macho Man” Randy Savage (with Elizabeth) for the WWF Intercontinental Championship

The storyline here was actually enjoyable and fun to watch play out. Randy Savage was the cocky heel champion who treated Elizabeth like dirt, George Steele was everyone’s favorite clumsy beast who had the hots for Elizabeth. Steele was actually a high school teacher in Michigan so he used to wrestle in the 60’s and 70’s only in the summer, and with no Dave Meltzer and national syndication around back then no one in his home town would ever know his true identity. George was actually my father’s favorite wrestler of all time and he used to tell me how the ol Boston Garden crowd used to love the gimmick. Anyway, like I said before I ran off track, Steele had a crush on Elizabeth so Savage didn’t take too kindly to that, so we have this match for the IC title recently won by Savage at the ‘Gahden’ over Tito Santana. Savage enters to his famous theme song as a pre-recorded comment saying he’s Macho Madness and he’s gonna win, ohhh yeah. Susan wants George to win because of the way Randy treats Elizabeth and will openly root for The Animal the whole match. Steele Animal Taunts (raises his arm over his head and chases his opponent) Savage to the floor with great speed considering he was 9 days away from his 49th birthday. Savage gets back in and tries to psych out Steele….yeah right, like THAT’S gonna work. Savage goes outside, grabs a chair and swings it in George’s direction before getting back in. George and Savage plays a game of cat and mouse before George catches him and bites him on the calf. Susan “Allright George, eat his leg!” Savage hobbles around the ring before hitting a running knee, knocking Steele in the corner. Steele does a baldo bomb (!!!) to Savage before taunting the Macho Man. George sticks his body haflway through the ropes to say hi to Elizabeth so Savage spins him behind, getting the animal tied up in the ropes. BRILLIANT! Savage puts the boots to Steele before he’s untied. Savage goes upstairs and hits a very sloppy looking bodypress for 1…2….nope, Steele press slams him through the ropes to the outside. Steele punches away at Randy inside the ring then throws him through the ropes to the outside. Savage then crawls underneath the ring, re-appears on the other side, gets in and delivers a high knee to the back of the confused Animal. Savage goes for a clothesline but Steele catches him and bites the arm. In a comical spot, Savage goes to grab the hair…cept there isn’t any on Steele’s head, just all over his body as told by McMahon. Steele hammers away on Savage in the corner before Randy goes outside and grabs a bouquet of flowers. He hits Steele with the flowers but Steele again bites him on the arm. George grabs the flowers and shove them into Randy’s face then whacks him a bunch of times with them. Steele whips him in the corner but then goes for his trademark turnbuckle snack. Steele rips open the top turnbuckle with his teeth then attacks Savage with the stuffing inside. Steele grabs another handful and shoves it in his face, Vince “Here’s another swallow coming up!”. George grabs a third handful and rakes the eyes with it as Vince makes note the ref is letting a lot of this stuff go. Steele chases Savage outside again but Savage leads George over to Elizabeth, where the dumb animal trys to court her. Savage uses it to his advantage as he climbs to the top and hits the double axe-handle to the floor. Back inside Savage scoop slams Steele as Susan makes a great point how Randy uses Elizabeth to his advantage. Savage goes upstairs and hits the flying elbow drop and covers for 1….2…nope, Steele kicks out at 2. Steele grabs by Randy by the nose, Vince “The Animal with a handful of face, what’s he gonna do with it?” before throwing him into the corner. Steele charges but the ref stops him, so Steele shoves him out of the way only to be tripped up by Savage who Flair pins for 1….2…3 its over. Savage was bitten, attacked with flowers and turnbuckle stuffing yet is still the Intercontinental Champion. George eats another turnbuckle as a consolation prize. Well….in terms of catch as catch can the match didn’t deliver but in terms of entertaining, definately enjoyable to watch over and over again. Ironically this would be the only match other than the battle royal I was looking forward to, brace yourself for the rest. George attacks the ref with the stuffing and chases him out of the ring as George Wells enters the ring.

Time of match: 7:07

Winner: Randy Savage by pinfall

We go to Mean Gene Okerlund over in Chicago to kill some time as the turnbuckles are replaced, which begs the question why that match wasn’t shown last before the boxing fight? Anyway Bill Fralic of the Atlanta Falcons gets in Big John Studd’s face and calls him the dud as Studd squashes a football and say he’s gonna do the same to Bill. Studd “I’m gonna get Perry and I’m gonna get you punk!” Gene tries to restore order as we are sent back to Vince and Susan. Vince asks Susan if she likes snakes and she says maybe Jake will lose so we don’t have to see Damien….all good in theory.

Match 3

George Wells vs Jake “The Snake” Roberts (with Damien)

Here’s an interesting pair-off. George Wells was football and wrestling star for New Mexico State before being drafted by Tom Landry and the Cowboys in 1971. Although he didn’t really make in in the NFL, he became a star in the Canadian League in the 1970’s before becoming a mainstay in the Stampede Wrestling. Wells actually was more much accomplished as a wrestler than meets the eye as he travelled to Mid-Atlantic, Central States and even the occassional Japanese tour well before coming to the WWF. Wells was 39 years old at the time and he’s going up against hot new star Jake “The Snake” Roberts so we know who’s going over. By the way, this was also Jake’s Coliseum Video debut. Jake enters without music and George attacks him immediately, wasting no time. George rallies with right hands and a backdrop on the stunned snake. George goes to town with forearm uppcuts before Jake hits a knee to the gut and throws him outside. Jake slithers outside where Wells cuts him off with right hands again before rolling him inside. George ducks under a leapfrog and blasts Jake with a flying shoulder tackle, shades of his CFL days as mentioned by McMahon. George looks a little like Tony Atlas only shorter with a gut, so when he headbutts Jake I actually thought it was Tony for a second. George whips Jake into the corner and hits a flying head scissors as Jake calls for time-out. Wells scoop slams Roberts as Vince mentions George has gained about 30 lbs in the last 6 months…..uh oh, getting old sucks doesn’t it. George does a knee lift that Jake sells by almost flopping out of the ring. George sends him off and powerslams him for 1..2…nope, gotta hook the leg! Jake rakes the eyes then slithers out of the ring again as Wells chases. Jake slithers into the ring and does a knee lift to George as he enters the ring. BRILLIANT! Jake taunts the crowd and delivers the D…..D….T to George then covers for 1….2….3 and its over. Sheesh, this looked to be a jobber match for Wells until Roberts hit the DDT, just to show how deadly the move was considered back then. After the match, Jake lets Damien out and sicks him on George, who proceeds to foam at the mouth after Damien synches in on the neck. Susan is visibly grossed out as is everyone watching on ppv before Jake notices George is legit choking so he removes the snake and taunts the crowd. Susan says George blew his chance to win the match early on as Vince says Roberts is still undefeated. We go back to the replay which shows George rolling into the DDT which is HIGHLY dangerous. What a shame George Wells had a great CFL career and a dozen or so years in the wrestling business yet will only be remembered for frothing at the mouth at Wrestlemania 2.

Time of match: 3:06

Winner: Jake Roberts by pinfall

The next segment is Susan and Vince discussing what we just saw then going to a highlight package of the Piper/T feud. Mr T had been at it with Piper since the first Wrestlemania a year earlier and things escalated after Mr T beat Bob Orton in a boxing match. Piper…a legitimate boxer before his wrestling days took exception to this and challenged T to a fight at Wrestlemania. We then go to Jesse Ventura over in LA with an interview with Hulk Hogan. Hogan plays off his rib injury saying it won’t matter and he’ll beat Bundy then says T is going to beat Piper as Ventura scoffs. Lets go to Howard Finkel to get to the main event of the New York portion. I should point out that the Piper interview from earlier on this version is shown here on the Coliseum Video version. They may have edited out an hour worth of footage but at least they edited the interview in at the right spot.

Boxing Match

Mr T (With Haiti Kid and Joe Frazier) vs “Rowdy” Roddy Piper (with Lou Duva and Bob Orton)

Now here’s an oddity, rather than have them wrestle (which Piper would have dominated) someone figured to get Mr T involved by digging to his Clubber Lang roots in a boxing showdown with the Rowdy one. Only problem was Roddy was a former New York golden gloves fighter so Mr T is STILL overmatched. The guest ring announcer is motormouth actress Joan Rivers. The guest judges are NBA star Darryl Dawkins (who plays for the Nets so half the crowd boo’s and the other cheers, heh), Watergate judge G Gordon Liddy and actor Cab Calloway. The guest timekeeper is none other than Herb The Nerd of the old Burger King “Where’s Herb” commercials. Vince says Mr T is the more experienced fighter which had to be said or else it would give away Piper’s background, which was a big no-no in 1986 WWF world. There will be 10 rounds 3 minutes apiece and Piper completely ignores the referee’s instructions and insults Mr T the whole way. Bell rings and the fight’s underway….Piper controls early with the jabs and T just backs up. Piper hand’t boxed in years and T is not really a fighter so this looks sloppy. I used to be an amateur boxer so I know when someone’s dogging or not and its quite clear Piper could knock T out in 3 seconds but he’s carrying him to entertain the crowd. Mr T just kept backing Piper in the corner and its a mess at the end of the round. Joe Frazier grabs a hold of Lou Duva as the seconds try to pry the fighters apart. The second round begins as the crowd begins to boo the proceedings because the referee stops the fight to wipe sweat off Piper’s face. Piper continues to control with the jab and right hooks as T covers up. T fights back with sloppy looking hooks and jabs so Piper just stands there. Piper again controls with the jab and fires away in the corner with right hooks before Mr T attempts to rally. Piper blasts with right hook after right hook and then T goes down. T utitlizes the standing 8 count before Piper closes in at the end of the round and knocks him down as the bell rings, guess you can’t be saved by the bell in any round. Piper’s just kicking the crap out of Mr T so to save face they have Bob Orton throw a bucket of water in Mr T’s corner. The 3rd round begins and Mr T is obviously winded so Piper continues the rope-a-dope before T sneaks a nice uppercut in. T plods away at Piper with body punches in the corner and Piper actually goes down from a few blows. Piper gets up the count of 8 so its 2 knockdowns to 1 in favor of Piper, so T continues to press advantage. T punches Piper with a right cross and Piper sells it by falling through the ropes to the outside….that was staged, it barely touched him. Piper crawls back in to beat the count as the 3 knockdown rule is in effect so one more and Piper’s done. Nothing else happens the rest of the round and the bell rings, then Susan St James blows the ending saying Piper might try something unsavory in this round. Piper throws the stand at Mr T and almost takes his leg out. They exchange right hooks in the center of the ring and at this point its all stages as there’s no way these guys should be keeping their arms low after 4 knockdowns. They knock each other’s mouthpieces out before they cram into the corner. Piper shoves the ref down then scoop slams Mr T, so much for boxing. The ref calls for the bell and a pier 6 brawl erupts in the ring. Lou Duva and Joe Frazier wrestle each other before Joe moves over to Orton. The ref raises Mr T’s hand in victory before Piper jumps on him….gawd just end this mess will ya? That was so staged at the end, but anway that’s it for New York so lets send it to Chicago and Gorilla Monsoon.

Time of match: 4th round

Winner: Mr T by DQ

CHICAGO PORTION

ROSEMONT HORIZON

CHICAGO, ILLINOIS

Commentators:  Gorilla Monsoon, “Mean” Gene Okerlund and Cathy Lee Crosby

Gorilla says hello and hands the mic to Mean Gene who hypes the battle royal. Monsoon brings in Cathy Lee Crosby of That’s Incredible fame to give her two cents before sending things to the ring announcer to begin our second portion of Wrestlemania 2

Match 5

Velvet McIntyre vs The Fabulous Moolah for the WWF Women’s Championship

Moolah had won the Women’s title from Wendi Richter back in November in the original screwjob (Spider Lady) and Velvet was next in line. Both were phenominal workers and that was remarkable considering Moolah would turn 63 later in the year, so let’s see how this turns out. There is a one hour time limit but I don’t see this going THAT long. Moolah attacks Velvet at the bell although the ref got in her way at the beginning. Moolah takes her over with several hairgrab snap mares and a right hand. Not bad for a 62 year old I must say, Moolah levels Velvet with a clothesline but misses a second. Velvet delivers 2 one legged dropkicks and a back elbow smash. Velvet scoop slams Moolah and goes upstairs, but misses the splash. Moolah covers for 1…2….3…and its over….wow, Velvet’s foot was on the bottom rope the whole time and nobody saw it. Not the ref, Monsoon, Cathy Lee, Mean Gene or Chet Coppock the ring announcer. The match had a 60 minute time limit and it didn’t even go 60 seconds, which was a shame considering the talent level of Velvet. Although Velvet would gain a measure of redemption at the inaugeral Survivor Series a year later, this would be her first and only Wrestlemania appearance unfortunately. That was way too short but it was good while it lasted, Chet Coppock announces the winner as Monsoon goes to the replay where once again her feet are on the ropes but nobody sees it.

Time of Match: 59 seconds

Winner: Fabulous Moolah by pinfall (still Women’s champion)

We go to the announce table as Mean Gene and Monsoon hype up the upcoming tag team title match and the battle royal. Cathy Lee says the football players have no chance of winning the battle royal, heh. Back to ringside for the next match.

Match 6

Corporal Kirchner vs Nikolai Volkoff (with Freddie Bladdie) in a Flag Match

This concept was stupid, the winner gets to raise the flag he represents…..so basically the next week on WWF All American Wrestling Nikolai Volkoff could come out with the Soviet and go back to normal? Whatever….if it wasn’t for Classy Freddie Blassie I’d hit the fast forward button…..which I actually hit when Volkoff does his singing gig. Like I said on my WRESTLING CLASSIC review (in case you missed it) Sgt Slaugher bolted for the AWA they brought in Corporal Kirchner to basically be the face militant of the company. Kirchner was actually left off a lot of cards after Wrestlemania because he was so tough in and out of the ring, most of the guys in the back were legitimately afraid to work with him. Corporal enters to music which was unheard of at the time unless you were Hogan or Savage, heh. Monsoon reminds Cathy Lee how rotten Blassie is outside the ring as we get started.  Volkoff does his spinning kick to the mid-section and a knee lift. Volkoff throws Kirchner outside and rams him into the ringpost, then bites him Freddie Blassie style. Even ol Freddie has a smile on his face when Volkoff sinks the teeth into Kirchner. Volkoff rams him into the ringpost again then rolls back inside as Freddie taunts Corporal by saying “Get in there ya yellow belly!” Kirchner is busted wide open but he rallies with right hands back inside and then forearms the referee halfway across the ring. Freddie Blassie trys to throws his cane to Nikolai but Kirchner intercepts it and waffles Nikolai with it, then covers. Rather than disqualify Kirchner for belting him in the head (maybe he was afraid of him too) he goes down to make the count 1….2….3 and Kirchner wins the flag match. Kirchner gets an unusually loud pop from the crowd, guess he must have been over in Chicago. Bad match but its always nice to see Freddie Blassie again….albeit this would be the last time on pay per view. This would also be the last appearance of Kirchner on a ppv for he was fired within the next year for failing a drug test. He ironically would become a huge star in Japan for becoming the Texas Chainsaw inspired Leatherface gimmick which he portrayed for at least 15 years. As for this match….blah, but at least it was short.

Time of match: 1:36

Winners: Corporal Kirchner by pinfall

We head to Chet Coppock who calls the next match the main event of the Chicago portion, proving that the main event doesn’t have to be the last match on the card. Gene introduces the guest time keeper Clara Peller, who you may remember for being the old lady who says “Where’s the Beef?” in the old Wendy’s commercials. We get Herb the Nerd and now Clara Peller, using this logic that means Ronald McDonald will be the guest time-keeper for Hogan vs Bundy in LA, right? Anyway the special guest referees are Chicago Bears legend Dick Butkus and Cowboys legend Ed “Too Tall” Jones (who is booed because the Boys are in the NFC who the Bears face every year or so)

Match 7

20 Man Battle Royal

Guest commentator: “The Big Cat” Ernie Ladd

With the growing popularity of the NFL, Vince decided to cross-promote by having some of the NFL stars compete in a battle royal. Instead of just naming all 20 at once, I’ll name them as they come out in order of Okerlund announces. The funny part was Cathy Lee Crosby was married to Joe Theismann at the time hence why she’s apart of the show. The sad part is the S.O.B. sued her for pretty much everything for reason’s I can’t remember. The first entrant is announced from the Chicago Bears which gets a huge pop, only it fizzles because its not Perry but rather offensive tackle Jimbo Covert. Covert actually had a hell of a career opening holes for Walter Payton and Neal Anderson. Entrant two is the first WWF Triple Crown champion (Heavyweight, IC and Tag) Pedro Morales, who needs no introduction. The third entrant is former tag team champion and future african tribal warrior Tony Atlas. The 4th entrant is world strongest man Ted Arcidi…who was instrumental in Triple H and Chyna getting into the business. The 5th entrant is former superbowl mvp of the Dallas Cowboys, Harvey Martin. Martin had a great career as a defensive end and made Craig Morton’s life a living hell in the Super Bowl 12. The 6th entrant is “Golden Boy” Dan Spivey….9 years before Waylon Mercy and 2 years before The Skyscrapers. Entrant’s 7, 8 and 9 are Hillbilly Jim, King Tonga and The Iron Sheik, who we all know of course. Entrant 10 is Ernie Holmes…the LEAST known member of the Steel Curtain of the 1970’s Pittsburgh Steelers. Jack Lambert would have fit right in here but I’m just nitpicking. Entrants 11 and 12 are the Killer Bee’s, Brunzell and Blair whom we know. Entrant 13 is Big John Studd and entrant 14 is his rival for the night, Bill Fralic. Fralic was the NFL rookie of the year as an offensive lineman, back when o-lineman were 275 lbs or less. Even in the early 90’s he opened holes for Barry Sanders upon joining the awful Detroit Lions. Entrants 15 and 16 are the Bret Hart and Jim Niedhart, The Hart Foundation, if you don’t know them you’re either retarded or not a wrestling fan. Entrant 17 is none other than former Patriots tight-end Russ Francis, who’s actually the son of Hawaiian wrestling promotor Edmund Francis. Entrant 18 is wrestling legend Bruno Sammartino coming out of semi-retirement to make one final Wrestlemania appearance. Entrant 19 is the star of the show, Chicago Bears beloved defensive tackle William “The Refridgeator” Perry. Entrant 20 is the favorite to win every battle royal he’s ever in, Andre The Giant. The bell rings and half the ring tries to eliminate Fridge but his teammate Jimbo Covert makes the save. Harvey Martin puts Dan Spivey in a headlock which I find hilarious the way he does it. Covert tries to slam King Tonga out but Fralic comes from behind and dumps them both. Ernie Ladd mistakes Dick Butkus for Mike Ditka, which I shouldn’t laugh at because I did the same once. Ernie Ladd himself was really the first NFL superstar to cross over into being a successful wrestler unless you think Wahoo McDaniel was the better NFL star for the Dolphins. John Studd and Andre go at it for old times sake as Bret Hart and Jim Brunzell tie up. Sammartino lifts Ernie Holmes and dumps him out so we’re down 2 football players early. Andre headbutts Russ Francis to the ground then goes at it with Studd again. Andre tries to eliminate Fralic as The Hart Foundation team up and get rid of Jim Brunzell. Brian Blair attacks Bret in retaliation. The crowd erupts when The Fridge slams Tony Atlas over the top and out showing who the crowd wants to see. The Bears had beaten my beloved Patriots 46-10 (ugh..good thing I wasn’t born yet) so the Bears were HUGE in Chicago as you can imagine. Anyway back to action Pedro Morales and Bill Fralic tie up as Perry tries his luck with Big John Studd. Fralic and Martin team up to try to get rid of Andre to no avail. Brian Blair tries to get rid of his real life nemesis The Iron Shiek as The Hart Foundation catches a breather in the corner. Bill Fralic and Bret Hart try to get rid of Ted Arcidi when all of a sudden Harvey Martin and Pedro Morales topple over the top together. Ted Arcidi tries to press slam Blair out but Hillbilly Jim and Dan Spivey make the save. Blair actually aids Jim and Dan in eliminating Arcidi as NFC rivals Fralic and Fridge go at it. Sheik backdrops Dan Spivey out then dumps Hillbilly Jim and Brian Blair out together. 9 guys left at this point and Fralic goes at it with the Hitman as Perry goes at it with Niedhart. Big John Studd and Iron Sheik team up and eliminate Bill Fralic, thus making his pre-match predictions a washout as Studd gets the last laugh. Sheik hammers away at Bruno before Sammartino backdrops him over the top and out. Bruno then tries to dump Studd out in the corner as Francis goes at it with Andre while The Hart Foundation have Perry tied up in the corner. Studd throws Bruno over the top and out and we’re down to 6 men. Fridge is hiptossed by the Foundation but Perry hops up and shoulder tackles Bret and Niedhart halfway out of the ring. one of my favorite spots in the entire show. Bret sold it like he got hit with a cannonball, just to show how over Fridge was. Perry and Studd face off in the center of the ring and Perry shoulder tackles Studd in the corner. Perry goes for another tackle but is met with an elbow and is hiptossed over the top and out. The crowd is LIVID and actually begin to pelt Studd with garbage inside the ring. Perry extends a handshake and Studd stupidly goes for it so Fridge pulls Studd over the top and out to a huge pop. The final four is Russ Franics….the lightest football player of the whole group, Bret, Niedhart and Andre. Too Tall and Butkus have to break Studd and Perry apart before the camera pans back inside where Francis teams up with Andre to go against the Harts. The Foundation double dropkicks Andre into his top rope tie-up spot leaving Francis by himself. Francis tries to fend off the two but is overpowered and eliminated. Andre unties himself and is worked over by Bret and Jim in the corner. Bret slingshots Niedhart into Andre and try to dump him but can’t. Niedhart himself actually had a cup of coffee with the Dallas Cowboys and Oakland Raiders during pre-season games but ultimately winded up in Calgary, where the rest is history. Niedhart goes to slingshot Bret but Andre gets his boot up and Bret crashes to the mat. Andre grabs Niedhart by the goatee, sends him off the ropes and big boots him over the top and out. Niedhart was actually in the center of the ring so he actually had to walk over to the ropes and eliminate himself. Down to 1 on 1 Bret goes upstairs only to be caught by Andre and press-slammed over the top onto Niedhart by Andre to win the match. Was there any doubt Andre was going to win? Pretty short for a battle royal but fun for historical purposes and football buffs.

Time of match: 9:08

Winner: Andre the Giant

We go back to Vince and Susan in New York who interviews “Rowdy” Roddy Piper. He rips on Mr T and William Perry and calls them cheaters while saying again he’d never paint himself black….watch WRESTLEMANIA 6 and see how that turns out. Susan chimes in and calls him a coward before Piper just goes off on Mr T with borderline racist comments. Back to Chicago, Mean Gene interviews Jimbo Covert who claims Fralic cheated by sneaking up from behind……moron. If this was to hype up a rivalry between the two, it was pointless because both were offensive lineman meaning they’d never see each other when the Bears played the Falcons. Iron Sheik comes in who says “Gene Mean” again then talks in farci, confusing Okerlund then saying Iran Numba Vun! On to the tag match….

Match 8

The British Bulldogs (Davey Boy Smith and Dynamite Kid) with Captain Lou Albano and Ozzy Osbourne vs The Dream Team (Greg Vallentine and Brutus Beefcake) with Johnny V for the WWF Tag Team Championship

Hey its Ozzy Osbourne with the poofy hair….and wearing all pink to boot! The Dream Team had beaten The US Express for the belts back in August of 85 so they’ve had a long reign indeed. Bulldogs enter to Rule Britania and Albano leading the way. They take forever to start before Davey Boy starts out with Vallentine. They trade blows in the center before Vallentine begs off in the corner. Davey Boy runs into a hiptoss as Okerlund says the Bulldogs have been chasing the tag belts for quite some time. Davey makes the tag to Dynamite who works over the hammer, who flops in the middle of the ring. Dynamite bowls Hammer over and delivers his snap suplex then makes the tag to Davey Boy. Davey does his delayed suplex for 1…2…nope, got the shoulder up. The Bulldogs have done both their trademark suplexes so Vallentine bails to the outside and regroups with Johnny V. Vallentine gets the advantage backs inside and makes the tag to Beefcake who works over the arm ringer, until he’s press slammed by Davey Boy. Dynamite tags in and clotheslines Beefcake down for a near fall, A small package gets a near fall as Davey tags in who does A PERFECT PLEX for 1…2…nope. Beefcake leads Davey into the corner where Vallentine hot tags in with an off the top rope forearm to the back. Vallentine executes a snap suplex for a near-fall and locks in a rest hold as Okerlund says Cathy Lee is too young (a spry 41 at the time) to remember Johnny Vallentine. Dynamite Kid tags in and they trade blows in the center of the ring before Kid takes advantage. Kid shoulderblocks Vallentine in the corner then tags in Davey Boy, double shoulderblock and down goes Greg. Beefcake interferes for no apparent reason other than to give Greg the upperhand, and it doesn’t work as Kid sunset flips Vallentine for 1…2..negative. Dynamite delivers a side backbreaker but Beefcake makes the save as Gene makes a hillarious comment. Gene “Ozzy Osbourne looks like he’s shaking outside the ring” I don’t even want to try to figure out the ammount of drugs he was on at the time so Gene dropping that line is just awesome. Vallentine reverse tombstone piledrives Dynamie for 1…2….nooo, Kid kicks out. Dynamite knees Vallentine in the nuts then press slams him off the top rope when Vallentine goes up there. He makes the cover and Davey tackles an interfering Beefcake, but The Hammer kicks out at 2. Davey goes to press slam Dynamite onto Vallentine but Greg rolls out the way. Davey tags in and hits the running powerslam for 1..2….NOOOO, Vallentine kicked out of the finisher. Davey delivers a snap suplex for a 2 count but Vallentine sends Davey shoulder first into the ring post, ouch. Vallentine stomps away at the injured shoulder before Beefcake tags in to pick up where Greg left off. Bulldog goes for the diamond cutter but Beefcake counters by throwing him, wow. Hammer tags back in and delivers a shoulderbreaker for 1..2….Vallentine pulls him up at 2. Dynamite goes upstairs for some reason and Davey sends Vallentine crashing skull first into him. Dynamite falls off the top like King Kong while Vallentine flops in the ring, the cover by Davey gets 1….2….THREE AND WE GOT NEW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS! Wow, the crowd did not see that as the finish at all, neither did I, Mean Gene, Captain Lou or the popcorn guy in the 4th row. Ozzy and Albano get in the ring and hold up the tag belts, now THERE’S a tag team for you. Cathy Lee Crosby gets in the ring as Davey goes outside to scoop up Dynamite. Okerlund hits ringside and interviews Albano who cuts a crazy promo then over to Ozzy who says “BRITISH BULLDOGS FOREVERRRRR” heh. The camera pans Davey and Dynamite outside and Kid looks completely out of it, must have been a harder fall than it looked. Davey staggers in the ring and says he’s gonna stay in the US….um, ok.  Either way The Bulldogs are the new tag team champions ending the 9 month reign of The Dream Team.

Time of match: 12:01

Winner: British Bulldogs by pinfall (New Tag Team Champions)

Back to Susan and Vince who hype what we just saw including the upcoming cage match between Hogan and Bundy. Vince speculates if Bobby Heenan will be a factor…are you kidding me? Vince sends things to Jesse with the beautiful Elvira and not beautiful Lord Alfred.

LOS ANGELES PORTION

L.A. SPORTS ARENA

LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA

Commentators:  Jesse “The Body” Ventura, Lord Alfred Hays and Elvira

Jesse opens things up next to Elvira and Alfred, call me crazy but I’d rather much see Ventura and Elvira, makes a very flamboyant couple. Elvira seems into it as Ventura runs down the remaining 4 matches. Anyway lets get on with the final four so to speak.

Match 9

Hercules Hernandez vs Ricky “The Dragon” Steamboat

Hercules was a newcomer heel supposedly managed by Freddie Blassie but since Fred was in Chicago, Herc will face Steamboat alone. The ring announcer is none other than Lee Marshall of AWA and WCW fame. Hercules wastes no time and attacks Steamboat at the bell with clubbing forearms to the back. Herc rams Steamboat into the top turnbuckle but Steamboat rallies with slides and a big chop to the chest. Steamboat executes a series of arm drags then applies an arm bar. Steamboat works over the left arm and shoulder for about a minute before Hercules sends him off the ropes, but then Steamboat flips over and delivers a crescent kick to the chest. He’s way too fast for Hercules both kayfabe and in real life, Herc can’t keep up with this pace. Once again Steamboat works over the left arm and shoulder of Hercules as even Ventura says that Herc can’t keep up this pace. Hercules gets to his feet and delivers an uppercut to the chest as Elvira says Steamboat looks like a wimp with the red scarf dangling from his knee. Steamboat’s anything but a wimp and he continues to take it to Hercules with chops, 2 leapfrogs and a back elbow smash that surprises Elvira. Ricky executes a beautiful snap suplex then continues to work over the left arm. Ventura says Herc better start moving and right on cue, Herc throws Steamboat in the corner then clotheslines him down. Herc slows the match down with boots to the side of the head as Elvira says The Dragon is hot. Ricky runs off the ropes but Herc catches him and falls backwards, hotshotting Steamboat off the top rope……now that was good. Steamboat rallies with chops an goes for a bodyslam but can’t hold him, Herc falls on top for a nearfall. Hercules methodically stalks the Dragon and rams him head first into the top turnbuckle. Herc catches Steamboat with a back elbow smash as Hays and Ventura hype up the remaining 3 matches. Herc dropes a series of elbows then poses for the irate crowd as Ventura scoffs for not going for the cover. Herc eventually makes the cover but Dragon kicks out at 2. Steamboat rallies with a series of chops but Hercules quels the momentum with a sloppy clothesline then covers for 1….2…nope, Steamboat covers. Hercules executes an overhead press slam as Ventura tells Elvira you’re suppose to hook a leg when covering….like she’s supposed to know or care? Hercules delivers another press slam then taunts the crowd again, bad idea. Hercules goes upstairs for a splash but Ricky gets the knees up in time. Ricky goes upstairs himself and delivers the FLYING CROSSBODY for 1….2….3 and its over. Steamboat wins it clean although Ventura says it was a fast count…wtf? Ted Dibiase once claimed on the Ultimate Warrior’s dvd that if Hercules didn’t have someone to lead him then he couldn’t have a good match, well he had Steamboat with him and he still messed up here and there. Anyway, Steamboat improves to 2-0 at Wrestlemania and we’re off and running in LA.

Time of match: 8:32

Winner: Ricky Steamboat by pinfall

There is no segment, on to the next match.

Match 10

Uncle Elmer vs “Adorable” Adrian Adonis

Uncle Elmer was a hilbilly gimmick not unlike Hillbilly Jim, but Elmer was actually 49 year old ring veteran Stan Frazier at the end of his career. Meanwhile Adrian Adonis had gotten too big for his Street Thug gimmick from the 70’s so a furious McMahon turned him into “Adorable” Adrian Adonis an openly gay wrestler. He changed his look from the New York Yankees ring jacket and black tights to a tent dress, dying his hair blond while caking his face with makeup. The whole thing was absurd but it got massive heat and Adonis was such a great bumper he made the gimmick work. Elmer enters to Don’t Go Messin With a Country Boy as Elvira says Adrian Adonis is the ugliest man she’s ever seen. The 6’8 Elmer chases Adonis out of the ring who hugs Jimmy Hart on the outside. Elmer catches Adonis with right hands upon entering the ring and whips Adonis into the corner where he Flair flips (at 300 lbs no less). Elmer clocks Adonis with a right hand and falls down from his own punch, the hell was that about? Adonis falls out of the ring and rips the ring apron completely off. Adonis climbs back in where another Elmer punch sends Adonis shoulder first through the ring post and outside on the timekeepers table, sheesh…he’s making Elmer look like Hogan so far. Ventura says Adonis is getting his dress dirty as Elmer pulls Adonis on the apron where he rips the dress off, yuck. Elmer slingshots Adrian in the hard way then delivers a very slow belly bump which Adrian sells by flying over the top rope backwards, doing a reverse Andre spot, Elmer pounds away on Adonis before he gets himself loose and delivers a punch to the chest. Adonis boots Elmer then shimmies out of his torn dress as Elvira is grossed out. Elmer whips Adonis in the corner and delivers an avalanche, which causes Adonis to crumple to the mat. Elmer gives the sign for the leg drop but misses it completely. Adonis goes upstairs and delivers a flying forearm drop…again at 300 lbs no less. A cover gets 1…2….3 and Adrian wins it. Ventura “You might not like Adrian Adonis but when it comes to wrestling he’s a very dangerous man.” Adonis shimmies around the ring while putting the boots to the fallen Elmer. Under normal circumstances that match would have sucked but Adonis fucking rules.

Time of match: 3:02

Winner: Adrian Adonis by pinfall

We then go to a pre-recorded interview with Alfred Hays who’s with Hulk Hogan. Hogan calls him Awful Alfred (Ha!) and says he’s not that hurt and he’s gonna beat Bundy. Total Count:  Dude – 0   Brother –  1  Jack – 0   Man – 3  so if you took the under you win. Back to ringside….

Match 11

The Funk Brothers (Terry and Hoss) vs Junkyard Dog and Tito Santana

Hoss Funk? Would it have killed them to call him Dory Jr? Still though, Terry Funk in a WWF ring during the 1980’s is well worth calling someone Hoss. The Funks enter first and Terry shoves ring announcer Lee Marshall halfway out of the ring for no reason….but it sure was funny. JYD and Santana enter to Grab Them Cakes and I notice Tito is wearing his red ring jacket from the first Wrestlemania, maybe he’s hoping it brings him good luck. Ventura bitches about JYD’s chain so Terry throws a chair into the ring, gotta love Terry folks. Hoss starts out with Junkyard Dog and Hoss gets the early advantage in the corner. Terry holds on to Hoss as he’s being whipped so Terry falls into the ring. JYD throws Hoss into Terry then scoop slams them both, then Tito gets in the ring and throws Terry outside where the Funks regroup with Hart. Hoss gets back in but makes the tag to Terry as Santana tags in on the other side. Terry chops Santana on the rope then for some reason nearly falls over the top rope himself, then turns around where Santana clothesline him over the top and out….that was weird. Hoss gets in and Santana dropkicks him twice for his troubles, then Hoss and Terry once again regroup on the outside. Terry climbs in so Tito tags out to JYD where they do a boxing segment. JYD gets in a few right hands then rams Terry’s head into the top turnbuckle 10 times. Terry staggers around and falls into the opposite corner where he rams his head into the turnbuckle 7 more times before finishing with a headbutt. JYD covers before Hoss interferes to break up the count, then JYD throws Terry over the top rope to the outside. After another regroup, Hoss tags in to do battle with the tagged in Santana. Hoss goes to work with european uppercuts until Satana leapfrogs over him and delivers the flying forearm. Santana covers and this one’s over 1….2..NOOOO, Terry dives in the ring (literally) and breaks up the count. Tito mount punches Funk until he rolls out of the ring and back to his corner. Tito and Hoss do a criss cross segment until Terry delivers a knee to the back to stop that. Terry tags in and throws Tito over the top to the floor where Jimmy Hart puts the sneakers to him. JYD chases Hart away as Terry and Hoss kick at Santana from the ring apron like 2 Texas vultures circling their prey. Elvira complains about Jimmy Hart’s megaphone as JYD rolls Tito back inside. Terry suplexes Santana then covers for a nearfall, then goes for another suplex but Tito counters it with a suplex of his own. Elvira notices the pulling on the tights during the suplex then says she hopes someone’s tights are pulled down so we get a little x-rated action…….let’s hope for her sake Hoss Funk and Junkyard Dog keep their tights on. Terry runs off the ropes and collides with Santana, but fortunately for Terry he falls into his own corner where Hoss tags in. Hoss delivers a double underarm suplex but the cover only gets 2 then he goes back to the european uppercuts. Elvira says Santana is hot and Jesse admonishes her for it, heh. Terry interferes and the Funks double clothesline Santana before Terry drops a leg. Funk covers 1…2….and no, Tito gets the shoulder up just in time. Terry goes for another leg drop but Santana moves and there’s nobody home, ouch. Tito crawls around to get away from Funk and makes the hot tag to JYD, who comes in like a house of fire. He unloads on the Funks and does a double noggin knocker then clotheslines them both. Terry tries to strangle JYD with some wrist tape but Dog turns around and headbutts Terry then backdrops him over the top rope to the floor. JYD goes outside then headbutts Hoss into the guardrail then bodyslams Terry on top of the time keeper’s table. Santana comes over and gets some shots in on Hoss for the hell of it. Terry climbs in the ring as JYD brings Hart up on the apron then punches him off…heh.  JYD nails Hoss then executes a small package on Terry for 1….2…nope, Hoss breaks up the count. Santana gets in, takes Hoss down and applies the figure four for a bit then lets him go. As the ref is telling Tito to take a hike, Hart tosses Terry the megaphone who waffles JYD in the back of the head with it. JYD falls like a dead deer and Terry limps over then covers for 1….2….3 and its over. Terry is either legitimately injured or he’s a terrific seller because he basically crawls out of the ring and falls to the cement. Cheap finish but The Funks win their first and only PPV match together and Santana begins a legendary Wrestlemania losing streak. It should be noted Dory “Hoss” Funk Jr would not make another WWF ppv appearance until the 1996 Royal Rumble while Terry didn’t resurface until the 1997 Royal Rumble. Bad match but fun because of Terry Funk’s antics, that’s why he’ll always be a draw in the business.

Time of match: 11:43

Winners: The Funk Brothers by pinfall

We are shown the cage being put together until we go to Mean Gene. In the background Hulk is lifting weights with Hillbilly Jim until we are shown highlights of Hogan beating the crap out of Magnificent Muraco until Bundy interferes and avalanches Hulkster a bunch of times. This sets up the main event, Hogan vs Bundy in a cage where Heenan or anyone else can’t interfere. We get sent to Ventura who interviews Bundy and Heenan, he calls Bundy “beautiful” which is downright creepy. Bundy says he’s gonna be the new champion and Heenan basically says the same thing only that Bundymania will run wild.

Match 12

King Kong Bundy (with Bobby “The Brain” Heenan) vs Hulk Hogan for the WWF Heavyweight Championship in a Steel Cage Match

Bundy in a cage, Hogan’s in deep trouble. The guest ring announcer is LA Dodgers manager Tommy Lasorda, the special guest timekeeper is Ricky Schroeder of Silver Spoons fame. The special guest referee is Robert Conrad which is just for show since referees do nothing in cage matches. Hulk climbs the cage and tears his shirt off as the crowd cheers. The bell starts as everyone but Bundy and Hogan exits the cage and here we go, the monster match of 86. Hogan and Bundy are both in standard gear. Bundy stalks Hogan before they trade blows in the center of the ring, where Hogan eventually wins out by driving Bundy into the cage with right hands. Hogan whips Bundy into the ropes and delivers the big boot….30 seconds into it. Hogan chokes Bundy in the corner with his own singlet then rams him head first into the cage. Hogan chops Bundy then clotheslines him in the corner before chopping him some more. Hogan whips him off then delivers a big elbow that staggers the big man but Bundy counters the face smash by attacking the injured ribs. King Kong stalks Hogan then kicks him square into the ribs then floors the champ with an elbow to the back of the head. Bundy works over the ribs then scoop slams him, then stomps away at the fallen Hulkster. Ventura is eating this up as Bundy calls for the door to open, he makes it halfway out before Hogan lunges for the leg and holds on to it. Bundy goes back inside and slams Hogan back first into the cage then goes to leave again. Hogan holds Bundy to stop him as Heenan screams for Bundy to get out of the cage. Bundy rips the tape off Hogan’s ribs then strangles Hulk with it before tying him to the cage with it. Bundy makes his way for the foor but once again Hogan makes the save with a rake to the eyes. Hogan comes back with right hands then delivers a back elbow smash in the corner. Hulk throws Bundy head first into the cage as Bundy blades on camera. Hulk attacks the open wound of Bundy as Elvira screams at the sight of Kong busted open….ironic. Hulk rams Bundy’s head into the cage again….and again….and again. Hulk climbs the cage then stands on Bundy before continuing to attack the open wound. Hulk calls for a slam but can’t hold him up as Bundy falls ontop of Hogan. Bundy staggers around trying to find the door with Heenan on the outside trying to direct traffic, in the background you can see Hogan getting to his feet. Hogan walks over and strangles Bundy with the rib tape as noutorious Hogan basher Alfred Hays praises Hogan saying tit for tat. Elvira “Jealous you don’t have your own cartoon show Jesse?”  Ventura “Doooon’t you get on my case Elvira!” Bundy whips Hogan into the corner and delivers the avalanche, Hogan crumples to the mat where Bundy does the big splash. King Kong rolls toward the door but Hogan stops him at the last second, diving at the legs just in time. Elvira “All that blood in the ring is making me hungry!”…..riiiiight.  Bundy sets up Hogan and delivers another avalanche, but Hulk no sells it (Hulk Up time). Hogan reverses an irish whip into the corner then POWERSLAMS the 450 pound King Kong Bundy to the loudest pop of the night. Even Ventura can’t believe it as Hogan runs off the ropes and hits the big leg drop. Hogan climbs over the top of the cage where Heenan grabs a hold of the leg as Bundy makes his way behind Hogan to stop him, Hulk hammers Bundy until he falls to the center of the ring, Hulk then kicks Heenan off then drops to the floor to retain the title. Bundy falls out of the cage as Hogan chases Heenan into the cage. Ventura scoffs at Hogan trying to beat up a manager, Heenan tries to climb out the other side but Hogan stops him. Hulk punches Heenan then rams him face first into the cage before delivering an atopmic drop..sending Heenan crashing through the door and onto the cement floor. Tommy Lasorda announces Hogan the winner as he does his usual 5 minute posedown inside the ring. Not that bad all things considering, fitting ending to a bizzare ppv to begin with.

Time of match: 10:15

Winner: Hulk Hogan (still WWF Champion)

You know, people want to say WRESTLEMANIA 9 was the worst wrestlemania ever….I’d have to say this comes close. Most of the matches were crash style and other than the Savage/Steele match there really wasn’t anything truly noteworthy. Everything was rushed because of the venues and the short length of the matches didn’t help either, it was just a mess. Luckily Vince learned his lesson and this would be the first and last time a ppv would be scheduled at different venues at the same time. The next Coliseum Video release after this is VILLAINS OF THE SQUARED CIRCLE, stay tuned for that one.

The Hulkster Hulk Hogan (CS002)

This was the second of the original Collector’s Series that included just 3 tapes so this shouldn’t take too long. HULKAMANIA 1 was already in stores so this tape was probably just trying to milk the name for as much as it was worth. We open the tape with just a Coliseum Video graphic, no opening montage. Vince McMahon in a red bowtie shills the action but making an error saying this was the first tape of the Collector’s Series (WWF’s Greatest Matches holds that honor) but no matter. Vince says at the time of this program, Hogan has been the reigning champion for over two years meaning this tape was released sometime in 1986. He says Hogan has defended the title in no less than 25 occasions, which is hogwash. Hulk as the champion would headline every card he’d appear on so he must have defended the belt at least 500 times at the time. Vince says you’ll see three title defenses as well as the match he won the title in against the Iron Sheik. Let’s get to the action.

Match 1

Brutus Beefcake (with Luscious Johnny V) vs Hulk Hogan for the WWF Heavyweight Championship

Commentators: Dick Graham and Gorilla Monsoon

Heh, these two would be buddies for years and years after this so its kind of shocking to see them go at it. This match was from February 16, 1985 in the Philadelphia Spectrum a month before the first Wrestlemania and a year into Hogan’s title reign. Brutus is wearing black and yellow lightning bolt tights and leopard print arm bands with Hogan in his standard yellow trunks. Hogan attacks Beefcake after Brutus takes too long to start with a right hand. Hogan atomic drops Brutus into the corner and he staggers out of the ring. Dick wins the David Crockett award for annoyance a minute into the match because all he does is whoop and holler after every move. Brutus regroups with Johnny V outside before sliding back in. They circle before Beefcake gets the upper hand on a tie up and shoves Hogan into the corner. Beefcake poses for the crowd while Dick calls Hogan “the Hulker”. Hogan goes to tie up but Beefcake struts away. They go to tie up again only this time they both strut away and Beefcake is irate. The crowd cheers when Hogan poses and Brutus charges only to be rammed headfirst into to the buckle. Hogan unloads with four left jabs and a windup roundhouse right. Hogan whips Beefcake into the corner and nails him with a back elbow smash. Hogan whips him off the ropes and floors Brutus with a running clothesline. Hogan drops the big…elbow then gets up to pose. Hogan bites Beefcake on the temple as Monsoon says he learned it from the Junkyard Dog. Hogan gets in a side headlock but Beefcake backs him into the corner and catches him off guard with a shoulderblock. Beefcake unloads with right hands and a forearm to the back. Monsoon says to watch for the high knee as Beefcake comes off the second rope with an axehandle smash that quiets the crowd. Beefcake drops another forearm but Hulk no sells. Beefcake goes to ram Hulk into the corner but he blocks it. Hulk rams Beefcake into the corner 10 times and Brutus flops to the ground. Hogan scoop slams Brutus and drops two elbows. Hogan picks up Beefcake, nails him with two right hands and gets reverse whipped into the corner. Beefcake levels Hogan with a big axehandle in the corner then stands on his head using the ropes for leverage. Brutus chokes Hulk on the second rope then rakes the eyes. Brutus chokes Hulk on the second rope then covers for 1….2….kicked out. Brutus delivers another axehandle to the back before going back to the blatant choke. He covers for a near fall as Gorilla says he’s not going to win the title that way. Brutus delivers a powerslam and covers for 1..2…nope, gotta hook the leg. Brutus drops a knee, a forearm and an elbow before another sloppy cover gets 1…2…HULK UP!!! You know the drill….no sell punches, right hand, right hand, right hand, whip, big boot, scoop slam, leg drop, cover. Oh wait, Johnny V gets on the apron. Hulk chases him off and grabs him by the collar only for Brutus to hit the high knee to the back. Brutus covers for 1….2..no, Hulk gets the leg under the bottom rope. Johnny and Brutus think they’ve won it so Johnny grabs the belt as Brutus celebrates in the ring. Beefcake and Johnny try to put the belt on as referee Joey Morella tells them no no no! Finally Hogan runs up, schoolboys Brutus for 1..2….3 and its over. Hogan is attacked by Beefcake and Brutus until he ducks and Brutus nails Johnny with a big forearm. Hulk rams their heads together. We cut there and thank God, I was sick of Dick whooping and screaming after every move. The one thing I’ll give credit to Vince for, for the most part he stayed away from whooping announcers in the David Crockett mold in favor of the articulate announcers like Gorilla and Jesse or Gorilla and Heenan. Bad match but what do you expect from Hulk and Beefcake?
Time of match: 10:40

Winner: Hulk Hogan by pinfall
We go back to December 1983 to a highlight of the Iron Sheik defeating 5 year champion (if you don’t count his loss to Antonio Inoki in Japan) Bob Backlund for the title to show how Sheik won it…..only to have Hogan take it away. It was a landmark match because of the fact that Backlund had it for 5 YEARS, think 6 months is too long to draw, try having it for half a decade. Vince knew Verne Gagne had dropped the ball in the AWA because he was too stubborn to deal with the growing ego of Hogan, but Vince was a smart business man. He knew that whatever he was going to take in based on the proceeds of Hogan being champion was going to be a hell of a lot more than Hogan was going to garner himself. While Verne frowned upon Hogan’s merchandise sales and Japanese tours, Vince thrived on it and would push other wrestlers to go on foreign tours to promote the product. Even though it was a group effort, one man was the key for Vince’s army….Hogan. The match we’re about to see has been replayed thousands of times and we’re about to take one more look at it.

Match 2

Hulk Hogan vs The Iron Sheik (with Ayatollah Blassie) for the WWF Heavyweight Championship

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Pat Patterson
This is just a repost from HULKAMANIA 1. The match that started it all, the true dawning of Hulkamania in the national spotlight. This match came about when Bob Backlund was dethroned on December 26, 1983 by the Sheik. Rather than get his deserved rematch, Backlund brought out old Freddie Blassie crony Hulk Hogan. Hogan said he had denounced Blassie and was totally reformed, his mission was to destroy the Sheik and bring the belt back to the good guys. On January 23, 1984 Hogan met Sheik for the title in Madison Square Garden. Hogan crosses himself on his way out to the ring and guess who’s holding the curtain for him, 69 year old Vince McMahon Sr, dying of pancreatic cancer but fighting it long enough to see Hulkamania take off. If you pause your tape/dvd/etc to see that image, it’s an iconic one. The changing of the guard if you will. The regional territory era of Vince Sr is going by the wayside as Hulkamania was about to sweep the nation. It’s a shame the old man died when he did, he would have loved to have seen some of the gigantic crowds his son was about to draw. Sheik’s got the red trunks on. Hogan’s wearing his standard yellow trunks and a red t-shirt that says American Made on the front and Hulk-A-Mania on the back. After the introductions, Sheik turns to take his ring gear off but Hulk PEARL HARBOR’S him because he’s such a role model. Hogan sends Sheik into the corner with his robe still on and delivers an elbow smash. Hulk strangles Sheik with his own robe then sends him off and clotheslines him with the robe. The ref finally gets the robe away from Hogan. Hulk unloads in the corner then delivers a running clothesline. Hulk drops a knee to the throat, rakes the eyes and chokes him over his head. Hogan spits at Sheik and delivers the big boot. Hulk covers but the referee takes forever to get over there and Sheik kicks out at 1. Hogan drops Sheik with a running elbow then drops another elbow. Patterson goes crazy but the cover only gets 2. Hogan whips Sheik into the corner but misses a charge. Sheik finally gets an offensive move in 3 minutes into the match by stomping away at the Hulk. Hulk staggers to his feet and Sheik executes a backbreaker. Sheik covers but Hogan powers out at 2. Sheik goes back to work with boots to the chest then “loads up the boot”. Another boot leads to a Boston crab applied by the Sheik. Monsoon scoffs at the referee for being out of position but Hogan powers out of the hold. Pat wonders when Sheik will go for the camel clutch as he delivers a well executed gut-wrench suplex on Hogan. Another cover 1…2 and no. Sheik goes back to the boots to the kidney then locks in the camel clutch. Patterson says no one’s ever broken the hold as Monsoon says this is what did in Backlund a month earlier. Monsoon “Only the immense power of the Hulk can save him!” Hogan begins to Hulk Up and soon powers his way to his knees. Hogan stands up with Sheik on his back and rams him back in the corner. Sheik falls like a dead deer in the center of the ring. The crowd goes wild and Hogan drops the big leg! The cover gets 1…2…3 AND WE GOT A NEW CHAMPION! Madison Square Garden goes crazy as Hulkamania takes over New York City. Monsoon “History made in Madison Square Garden! Hulkamania….is here.” He wasn’t kidding, folks. Hogan kisses the belt (the same won worn by Backlund a month earlier before Sheik won it) as Fink announces Hogan the winner and new champ. Now Vince had his larger than life champion and the road to dominance was about to begin.

Time of match: 5:34

Winner: Hulk Hogan by pinfall (new WWF Champion)
Its only natural to re-visit the postmatch celebration in the locker room with Hogan ranting and raving to “Mean” Gene Okerlund. Hulk says he’d bring the belt back to the USA and he continues to rant saying the belt is the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen and its part of Mean Gene now too. Andre the Giant from out of nowhere pops the cork on a champagne bottle and douses Hogan with it. Andre shakes Hogan’s hand, says he’s proud of him and says something else in his broken English when Ivan Putski pops open another bottle and douses Hogan with it. Ivan “Hey I’m proud of ya Jack” as Gene says “Its super Monday at the Garden” and then HE gets doused from behind by Rocky Johnson. We cut the celebration there and skip forward to Gene interviewing Hulk with his parents, Pete (dad) on his right and Ruth (mom) on his left. His mom says her son is dedicated, he’s wonderful for the sport and its wonderful for him. Gene interviews his dad next and Pete says he’s proud of him and speaks softly until Hulk rants and raves at the top of his lungs. His father looks annoyed as his mother starts laughing. Gene signs off and we cut here. Talk about a party, the true dawning of Hulkamania and the beginning of the national takeover by Vince Jr. We go right to the next match.
Match 3

The Iron Sheik (With “Ayatollah” Blassie) vs Hulk Hogan for the WWF Heavyweight Championship)

Commentators: Dick Graham and Alfred Hays
After Hogan defeated the Sheik and Hulkamania took off, a re-match for the title was inevitable and this match was from May 5, 1984 at the Philadelphia Spectrum. We join the match already in progress as Hogan is wearing blue tights, not his standard yellow trunks with the Sheik in green. He boots Hulk in the throat then loads up the boot. Sheik rams Hulk head first into the boot and delivers a forearm to the head. We get a TAPE EDIT and Sheik taunts Hogan. Sheik goes for a snap suplex but is blocked and Hulk delivers one of his own. Referee Dick Woehrle checks Hogan who’s busted wide open as Dick whoops again. Sheik goes after the open wound but Hulk no sells a series of punches. Hulk lands two right hands, grab Sheik by the handlebar mustache and delivers a windup roundhouse right. Hulk scoop slams Sheik and drops the big leg but doesn’t cover. Hogan says he’s going to make Sheik pay so he undoes the left boot of Sheik. Hulk nails Sheik a few times but still can’t get it off. Hulk rakes the eyes and finally gets the boot off. Hulk caters to the cheering crowd and loads up the boot. Sheik bails but Hogan follows him and waffles him with the boot. Sheik blades on camera but we get a TAPE EDIT and the next shot we see is both Woehrle and Sheik flat on their asses with Hogan ramming the boot into the bloody head of Sheik. A host of jobbers hit the ring to pry Hulk off Sheik as he retreats to the back leaving Hulk to stand tall. Ring announcer Mel Phillips announces it was a double-count out and Hulk is irate. He keeps the belt so its all good. I wish I could have seen the full match because it had the intensity of a grudge match not usually seen on Coliseum Video. Did I just say that? Oh wow.

Time of match: Joined in progress (an unofficial 3:53, the actual match was 14:18)

Winner: No one (Double Count-Out)

Onto the final match with no interviews or hoopla.
Match 4

Don “The Magnificent” Muraco (with Mr. Fuji) vs Hulk Hogan for the WWF Heavyweight Championship in a Steel Cage Match

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and “Mean” Gene Okerlund
This match was from June 21, 1985 at Madison square Garden and Vince overdubs saying this is the rubber match in the series (Muraco won the first match by count-out, Hogan took a re-match at Madison Square Garden by DQ, already covered in GRUDGE MATCHES) and there must be a winner here. Hogan enters the cage wearing the white tights with Muraco in his standard gear. Hogan tosses his bandana and shirt outside before throwing the belt at Muraco. Don goes to whip Hogan with the belt but Hulk ducks under and unloads on him with right hands. The bell rings and Hulk goes to nail Muraco with the belt but Don slides out of the way. The ref gets the belt out of the ring and slams the door as now it’s just one on one. Muraco knees Hogan and attempts to throw him into the cage, but Hulk blocks it. Hulk taunts Don and they circle again. Hulk fakes a tie up before kicking Muraco in the ribs and tries to send him into the cage. Don resists, Hulk rakes the eyes and whips him into the corner. Hulk unloads with a right hand but Don blocks another cage ram attempt. Muraco mulekicks Hogan in the gonads and stomps away at him. Don drops Hogan with a kneelift then continues to kick away. The crowd chants for Hogan as Muraco floors Hogan with another right hand. Muraco drops an elbow to the gonads which is all legal in this match. Muraco goes for the door but Hulk cuts him off with right hands. Muraco gets a thumb to the eye as Mean Gene says the winner is over the top or out the door, no pinfalls or submission. Muraco pounds on Hogan who HULKS UP!!  Rather than the usual head punches, Hogan nails Muraco with two bell-ringers, a whip, a clothesline and a big elbow drop. Hogan bites Muraco on the temple then headbutts him. Hulk torpedoes Muraco head first into the cage. Gorilla “Hulkster ramrodding Muraco into the steel cage!” Take away ‘into the steel cage’ and that doesn’t sound good at all. Muraco is busted wide open as Hulk torpedoes him into the cage again. Don staggers to his feet and Hulk greets him with a series of right hands. Hulk goes for the big clothesline but Muraco catches him and sends him head first into the cage. Muraco slingshots Hogan into the cage as Monsoon points out no one’s tried to leave the cage over the top. Hulk blades and right on cue Muraco goes for the top. He gets halfwayout but Hogan grabs him by the tights. Hulk rams Muraco into the top of the cage before we get a TAPE EDIT. Muraco drops Hogan with an elbow as both men are bloody messes. Monsoon says we got 28 grand in the house tonight which is BS. Muraco lands a right hand but Hogan ducks under another. Muraco runs right into the big boot that sends him through the ropes, getting his head stuck. Muraco unties himself and makes a leap to stop Hogan from leaving the cage. Hogan stomps at Muraco, drops him with a big right hand and exits the cage to win the match. We cut right then and there to the end of the tape. Decent cage match with both guys getting bloody. That’s two straight bloodbaths on this tape, very edgy for the time period.

Time of match: Clipped

Winner: Hulk Hogan
The credits roll with the Rock N Wrestling theme instead of the usual orchestral piece. We then get a montage with the Coliseum Video theme (where was that in the beginning?) for every Coliseum Video that was out at the time. The last one they highlighted was BEST OF THE WWF VOLUME 6 so I placed the Collector’s Series after those ones. As for this, I kind of liked this tape, standard mid 80’s action and it was kept short and sweet. It was only packaged as a collector’s Item so no sense blasting it for lack of matches. This was mostly pre-Wrestlemania stuff so it’s more valuable for its historical purpose than it is for the matches themselves. I give it 3 stars out of 5. One point off because Dick Graham is annoying and another off because they cut up the best match on the tape (the Spectrum bloodbath with the Sheik) and kept the worst one in its entirety (Beefcake). This was actually the second tape of the short lived Collector’s Series and the last one is next: HIGHLIGHTS OF WRESTLEMANIA.

Ricky The Dragon Steamboat (WF019)

To have a personal profile tape this early in the Coliseum Video lineage, you have to be special. Discounting the god awful COUNTRY BOYS tape, the only ones who had personal profiles were the top stars ANDRE THE GIANT, Roddy Piper and Hulk Hogan (THE LIFE AND TIMES OF LOU ALBANO doesn’t count because Lou was a manager). Steamboat getting his own tape was a testament to his amazing talent as he wasn’t a champion nor was he even in the WWF as long as Hogan, Andre and Piper were. Tito Santana was a two time IC champion and he didn’t have his own tape (or ever get one). Does Steamboat deserve it though? Absolutely. He had some classic matches in the NWA and seemed ready to break out as a top star but he was held back by Dusty Rhodes. Going to WWF meant more exposure for sure, but he also had to play second fiddle to Hogan like he had to play to Rhodes. Ah well, least he got his own tape in WWF. Let’s stoke it up. Cue the 1985 Opening…oh and props to 411mania to discovering the two guys in the black and white segment of the opening were Lou Thesz and Rikidozan. Thesz needs to introduction while Rikidozan was pretty much the Thesz of Japan. He was Japan’s top star until he turned the page to his top two students, Antonio Inoki and Giant Baba….yes, All-Japan and New Japan’s founders. Gorilla Monsoon is our host tonight and he brings up how Steamboat has only been around a year and yet has had amazing matches. He says Steamboat will take on The Hammer, Don Muraco and Randy “Not so Macho Man” Savage (Monsoon’s words). We go to our first match before he’s even done with the introduction, geez, someone’s in a hurry.

Match 1

Ricky Steamboat vs Greg “The Hammer” Valentine (with Jimmy Hart) for the WWF Intercontinental Championship

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Gene Okerlund
This match is from June 21, 1985 in Madison Square Garden and its joined in progress. Steamboat is in the long black tights and Greg is in the red trunks. Steamboat stalks Greg with a karate pose until Greg tries to scoop slam him. Ricky blocks it until Greg turns it into a takedown. Ricky switches into a single leg takedown and chops Valentine in the gut. Greg staggers to his feet and Ricky goes to work with chops until Greg bails. Hart screams “No karate!” and Gene scoffs “Whataya mean no karate?” Jimmy “Hey ref, watch that kung fu karate!” Greg goes for forearms in the corner but Ricky blocks all of them and  chops Greg all the way to the ropes where he snap mares him then does the Perfect neckbreaker all in two swift motions. Damn he’s good. He locks in a chinlock until Greg gets to his feet and turns it into an arm ringer. Ricky reverses it and drops the champ with a reverse crescent kick. Monsoon and Okerlund agree they’d love to stick Jimmy’s megaphone in his ear. A quick thrust kick and back elbow smash sends Valentine to the match. Ricky stalks Greg in the corner before landing 5 kicks to the jaw. A chop to the chest is met with a Gene Okerlund “Hiyah!” The first cover of the match gets a two count. Ricky ducks under a clothesline and lands a crossbody for 1….2…nope, referee was out of position and he didn’t hook the leg. Steamboat goes to the front headlock until Greg backs him in the corner. Greg pounds away on Ricky in the corner with forearms. Ricky falls to the apron and Valentine delivers two forearms to the chest. Ricky recovers with a shoulderblock and two chops to the forehead before going upstairs. He stuns Greg with a flying chop and he tackles him to the ground. Ricky covers for 1…2..no. A scoop slam by the Dragon is wasted as Valentine gets his knees up on a splash attempt. Greg drops a knee to the ribs and we TAPE EDIT. Valentine works on the leg and goes for the figure four, only for Ricky to counter it with a cradle for 1….2..and no. Ricky does something to stun Greg but we miss it due to an unnecessary shot of the crowd. Ricky goes for a scoop but Hammer lands on top of him for 1….2…nope. Valentine catches Ricky with a forearm to the rubs and Steamboat goes tumbling through the ropes and to the outside. Hart taunts Ricky until the Dragon gathers his bearings. He looks to the crowd for support who pops. Ricky gets fired up, pounds the mat then starts no selling Greg’s offense. They trade blows until Steamboat gets the upperhand with overhand and knife edge chops. Greg goes down and Ricky has the crowd in an uproar. Two more chops drop the champ and Monsoon says he won’t get the pin because he didn’t hook the leg. Once again the cover gets a two and an elbow drops the Hammer. Ricky goes upstairs and delivers his flying crossbody for 1….2….NOOOOO, foot on the ropes. Greg recovers and back suplexes the Dragon. Greg drops two running elbows and covers for a two count, failing to hook the leg. Valentine goes for a figure four but Ricky counters by kicking him into the corner. More chops are followed by a roundhouse kick that sends Greg over the top rope to the floor. Hart picks Greg up and throws him back in but the bell rings. Stemboat chops both Greg and Jimmy through the ropes as the Fink gets in the ring. Monsoon speculates Greg was DQ’d but Fink announces Steamboat has won by count out. That was a pretty quick count by Dick Woehrle since the announcers missed it as well as the fans and Steamboat himself. We go to the replay as Monsoon says the title does not change hands on a count-out. We end the match here and that was something else. Classic booking as Steamboat beat up Valentine six ways from Sunday yet Greg retained the belt. Was it a good match? Yes it was, the story being told was the methodical Hammer could barely keep pace with the speed of the Dragon. These two would meet again years later, but for now Ricky gets the duke.
Time of match: clipped

Winner: Ricky Steamboat by count-out (Valentine retains)
Next up is a September 1985 interview on The Body Shop with Jesse Ventura. Ventura praises his own shades as he’s wearing jeans, cowboy boots and a yellow t-shirt with Manhattan written on it in the shape of NYC, clever. Ricky comes out in his black karate gi and takes a seat next to Jesse. Ventura asks how he’s doing and Ricky says pretty good. Jesse asks where the name Steamboat comes from and Ricky says he’s carrying on the family tradition. This is half true actually. When Ricky first started out he went under his real name, Richard Blood. Once he ended up in the Florida territory, Eddie Graham felt that the name sounded too heel like (compared to Dick Blood?) and decided to re-name him. Since he had Hawaian blood, Graham had him renamed Ricky Steamboat, the son of Hawaiian legend Sammy Steamboat. The funny part was nobody bothered to tell Ricky before he went to the ring the night he was renamed. The announcer referred to him as Ricky Steamboat, son of Sammy and Ricky tried to tell him that’s not his name, only for the announcer to mutter “shaddup, that’s your name now” or something like that. Ventura then says “so wait, your great great grandfather didn’t climb a coconut tree, see a steamboat and say that’s a good name for himself?” Ricky counters “No, he was standing on a volcano.” Ventura then goes into fashion mode asking what’s the deal with the outfit and says that kung fu he’s been using is illegal. Ricky “Illegal?” Ventura bitches that he’s going for the throat and Ricky says he’s checked the WWF rules and says he uses open hands, not fists like Jesse uses. Ventura “waiiiiiit a minute!” Ventura says “You don’t bend the rules?” Ricky answers no so Jesse gets bent out of shape and ends the show right then and there. Its funny because Ricky really never did bend the rules. There’s a very, very short list of guys that had a long, productive career that never worked heel. The three names I can think of are Tito Santana, Rey Mysterio Jr and Ricky Steamboat. That’s also why Ric Flair says Ricky is NOT the best wrestler of all time, because he never worked heel. It would have been interesting to see Ricky come out strutting with shades and telling the fans to stick it, but since he never did it, its hard to imagine that.
We go from an interview with Jesse to an infamous “training” segment. Once again Vince couldn’t leave well enough alone and had to give Ricky a “personality”. No he didn’t sing and dance on T.N.T. (that I know of) but he did have this “training” portion on the show. The segment is called “Becoming the dragon: the three moments of truth”. Gene Okerlund is on location with Ricky at the temple of Chang-Lao. They walk across a wooden bridge as Gene admires the scenery. Ricky says it wasn’t always serene and that it was the site of his first test: The Bridge of Serenity. We then cut to Ricky beating up ninjas in black masks…yes of course I’m serious. Now many say that the ninjas were midgets, but they’re not. They just happen to be a bit shorter than Ricky, but they’re not full fledged midgets. The object is to cross the bridge and Ricky does that after beating up the two ninjas. Some of the blows were definitely choreographed but at least they didn’t have any goofy sound effects. Back to Gene and Ricky and the Dragon says years of training saved him there. Gene and Ricky walk into the “Garden of Tranquility”. Its not really a garden as it is a stone walkway with rocks around. Ricky says this is where he went through his second test. He’s fighting ninjas again only with sticks. He dispatches them quickly as we go back to Gene and him. Gene brings us to the third test, “The Temple of Chang-Lao” where Ricky says it was the hardest one of all since he had to do it in front of all the monks. This time he’s attacked by four ninjas who he completely annihilates in short order. He bows to Chang Lao himself who presents him with a black belt for surviving the three tests. As silly as this sounds, it could have been a lot worse. It did show Steamboat beating the crap out of groups of ninjas by himself, and if he can do that, guys like Greg Valentine and Don Muraco stand no chance. Onto the next match.
Match 2

Ricky Steamboat vs Brutus Beefcake (with Luscious Johnny V) in a Street Fight

Commentators: Jack Reynolds and Billy Red Lyons

May 26, 1985 in what appears to be the Maple Leaf Gardens saw Steamboat take on Brutus in what Monsoon in the overdub calls a No-DQ, No count-out affair. So it’s a street fight without actually calling it that…great. Steamboat is in the long black tigts and Brutus is in the long zebra striped tights. Beefcake attacks Steamboat from behind before he can take his gi off. He drags Steamboat to the apron where he pounds away with forearms to the chest. Once Ricky is outside, Brutus sends Ricky to the barriet and chokes him with his own black belt. The referee isn’t counting and I wonder why until the bell rings once Brutus sends Ricky inside. NOW the match has officially begun. Brutus sends Ricky off and clotheslines him. Billy says it was a mistake for Ricky to wear that outfit to the ring and Brutus drops the Dragon with a right hand. Brutus poses for the irate crowd and drops a boot off the second rope. A scoop slam is followed by more boots to the sternum. Brutus struts for the angry crowd before Ricky begins to rally with right hands. Karate chops from Ricky sends Brutus into the corner. Brutus reverses an irish whip and drops Ricky with a clothesline. Brutus drops a big forearm and covers, the referee takes forever 1…..2…no. Beefcake pulls the top part of the gi over ricky’s head hockey style and pounds away. Ricky finally sheds the gi and Jack finally calls it such after calling it a kimono up until this point. Guess Vince was in his ear in the production truck. Beefcake rams Ricky’s head into the buckle and pounds Ricky’s chest with forearms. Ricky just beat the crap out of four ninjas armed with weapons and now he can’t beat up Brutus Beefcake? Beefcake continues to pound away only now Ricky is no-selling it. Ricky blocks a turnbuckle attempt and rams Brutus’ head into it. Ricky chops Beefcake but falls on a scoop slam attempt. Brutus covers for 1….2….noooooo. Ricky kicks out just in time. Brutus lands a series of boxing jabs followed by two forearm smashes. Steamboat then blocks a series of forearms before sliding under Brutus’ legs. A chop stuns Brutus before a big chop drops him. Ricky rings the arm then crescent kicks Brutus three times until he drops. A knife edge chop to the throat staggers Brutus who swings and misses. A knee to the ribs stuns the Dragon but Ricky ducks under a haymaker. Ricky swings and misses himself and Brutus makes him pay with a clothesline that nearly decapitates the Dragon. We get a TAPE EDIT and now Steamboat is rallying. Brutus then counters a scoop slam with a back suplex then bridges for 1…2…..nope. Ricky gets the shoulder up at 2 3/4. Brutus kicks away at Ricky and taunts him. Brutus punches, kicks and stomps the Dragon. Beefcake goes to the outside, drags Ricky out and slams him on the cement floor. Beefcake gets in the ring but distracts the ref, allowing Johnny to attack…but he doesn’t. Ricky gathers his bearings but Beefcake reaches through the ropes and brings him back in the ring. Beefcake goes for the piledriver but Ricky counters with a backdrop. Reynolds reiterates that this is No count outs and no DQ. Ricky catches a foot and chops Brutus down. A running chop drops Brutus then Ricky does the swinging neckbreaker. More chops follow and a reverse atomic drop stagger Brutus. Beefcake goes upstairs and hits the flying crossbody. The cover gets 1…2…..no. The ref’s arm doesn’t drop for three but the fans and the announcers say Ricky has won it. The lights go on as well but there was no 3. Everyone was fooled on that one. The lights go back off as Ricky rallies in the corner. Brutus reverses an irish whip but misses the charge. Ricky goes for a scoop slam but Johnny holds the foot of the Dragon. Brutus falls ontop with Johnny still holding on…1…..2….3 its over. The lights go on but all of a sudden the ref for whatever reason waves off the pinfall. Brutus raises his arms in victory but the ref snaps it downas the lights go off again. He tells Beefcake that he saw Johnny holding the foot, which is the correct call but why did he count 3 to begin with? Brutus throws Ricky over the top rope and argues with the ref. Ricky skins the cat back in, runs and rolls up Brutus for 1…2…..3 and NOW its over. The lights go on for a final time as Johnny V jumps into the ring to protest. Johnny takes a swing at the ref as he exits the ring with the victorious Steamboat. Jack says the referee’s name is Frank Gore…no, not the San Fransisco Giants running back. We go to the replay to see the real pinfall and we cut here. That was a wild match that Brutus controlled for most of it. Ricky got the pinfall but he didn’t look too impressive during it. Not only that, it was a street fight that wasn’t even all that violent. Then again, not much Ricky can do with Brutus but get beat up and make the comeback. I’m just glad its over.
Time of match: 13:27

Winner: Ricky Steamboat by pinfall
To set up the next feud, we have to go to an episode of T.N.T. where Vince in a decent looking brown suit interviews Don Muraco and Mr. Fuji. Vince brings up Steamboat and Muraco says his actions speak louder than words. Vince, Fuji and Muraco look at footage of Muraco attacking Steamboat and hanging him. Don says King Curtis Iaukea was the only Hawaiian wrestler that he admired and he has no love for Ricky. Fuji and Muraco hang Steamboat and glad-hand each other on the TNT set. Muraco says that Ricky’s too soft and he’s in his world now. Muraco says he’s as far as he going to go and doesn’t need any more titles. Kind of stupid and Vince counters “Well if you’re on top, there’s only one way to go, down!” Muraco says he won’t go down, but he’ll spit down at people under him. Muraco says he’s got some fat broads for him and he’s having a heck of a time with Mr. Fuji.  So the dastardly Muraco fired the first shot and its now time for revenge one step at a time.

Match 3

Ricky Steamboat vs Mr. Fuji

Commentators: Vince McMahon and Bruno Sammartino

After being hung by Fuji and Muraco, Ricky vowed revenge. On August 20, 1985 he got Mr. Fuji first. Fuji is in the long red tights and Ricky the long black. Ricky sprints to the ring and attacks Fuji before the bell rings. Howard Finkel almost didn’t make it out of the way. Ricky chops Fuji, sends him off and chokes him with the black belt. Ricky strangles Fuji as Vince says its payback from before. Referee Dick Woehrle doesn’t even bother to make a 5 count. Ricky chops and punches Fuji before delivering an atomic drop. Ricky lands a double chop but Fuji counters with a punch to the gonads…ow. Ricky pounds the mat in frustration as Fuji drops Ricky with his own chops. A falling headbutt has the crowd chanting “Steamboat!” Fuji locks in a nerve hold but Ricky powers out of it with a chop to the head. Fuji retaliates with a chop of his own before reapplying the hold. Ricky once again powers out of it with chops and a leapfrog but Fuji alertly gets a knee to the ribs. Going back to the nerve hold, Vince calls Fuji a world class wrestler. Steamboat does the fade-then-revive routine. Ricky rakes the eyes and chops Fuji down. Ricky goes upstairs and catches Fuji with the flying crossbody for 1….2..nope, Fuji kicks out. Ricky goes for the big splash but Fuji gets the knees up. Bruno says that’s the first time he’s seen someone kick out of that and Vince says Ricky didn’t hook the leg. Ricky rolls through a back suplex, rolls up Fuji and gets the 1..2….3 to win the match. Steamboat beats a hasty retreat as Fuji is stunned in the ring. Decent crash style match but that made Steamboat look bad. They should have booked Steamboat to leave Fuji a bloody mess in the ring and say that Muraco is next. Instead he’s booked to barely beat Mr. Fuji the MANAGER! If he can barely beat Fuji, how’s he going to beat the former IC champion Muraco? Still, decent crash style match
Time of match: 4:06

Winner: Ricky Steamboat by pinfall

BUT WAIT THERE’S MORE! After the match, Muraco runs out and attacks Steamboat with a chair. He breaks the wooden thing over him and Fuji assists in stomping him. Muraco and Fuji leave to a chorus of boos as Vince puts over Muraco as a heel, calling him every name in the book. Vince goes to the replay of Muraco breaking the chair on Steamboat’s back. Bruno says the duo should be fined and suspended and we cut here. Muraco was building tremendous heat and you know the grudge match would come eventually.
Match 4

Ricky Steamboat vs Don “The Magnificent” Muraco (with Mr. Fuji)

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Alfred Hays

October 18, 1985 in the Capital Center saw the long awaited grudge match between Steamboat and Muraco. We’re joined in progress and Muraco is in standard gear with Steamboat in the….you guessed it…long black tights.  Muraco stands on the apron as Ricky gets bent out of the shape in the ring. Ricky ducks under two clotheslines, reverses a whip and drops Muraco with a big chop. A hiptoss is followed by a scoop slam. A knee lift sends Muraco to the floor and the ref has to hold Steamboat back. Monsoon scoffs at the ref for holding him back as Muraco regroups with Fuji. A test of strength is won by Muraco who pounds away at the Dragon in the corner. Ricky reverses a whip and backdrops Don before hip tossing him again. A scoop slam has Muraco sliding through the ropes onto Monsoon and Alfred’s announce table. Monsoon says Muraco is in their lap, literally. Gorilla taunts him as Muraco gets to his feet and says “Shut up you sonovabitch.” Muraco gathers his bearings and slowly makes his way into the ring. Don purposely stalls then lands a right hand to Steamboat’s head. Ricky rams Muraco’s head into the buckle and lands a right hand. He goes for another right hand but referee Dick Woehrle grabs his arm which allows Muraco to connect with a right hand. Monsoon gives Woehrle a tongue lashing as Steamboat staggers around. “You cannot do that!” Muraco gets a thumb to the throat and delivers a back suplex. Muraco drops a knee and snap mares him over. Muraco slingshots Ricky throat first onto the bottom rope. An atomic spike staggers Ricky and Muraco scoop slams him down. Another scoop slam is followed by a clothesline but Ricky keeps getting up. A slam and another clothesline sends Ricky over the top rope to the outside. Muraco reaches through the ropes to slam ricky’s head into the apron. Muraco slides outside and drops Ricky throat first onto the barrier. Alfred says Muraco should go for the piledriver as Ricky makes it to the apron. Muraco clotheslines him down as Ricky slides into the ring. Muraco whips Steamboat off but Ricky ducks under the right hand and executes a desperation clothesline. Muraco slides to the apron then goes upstairs. Ricky catches him and slams him off the top rope. Ricky scoop slams Don and caters to the crowd. ANOTHER scoop slam has Ricky fired up and he atomic drops Muraco, who catches his head in between the ropes. Ricky chops away at Muraco as Woehrle unties him. On the floor, Ricky sends Muraco into the side of the ring. Steamboat goes upstairs and chops Muraco on the apron, who falls off. On the floor again Ricky rams his head into the apron before sliding back into the ring. Ricky suplexes him into the ring and caters to the crowd. Sensing victory, Ricky chops Muraco twice before unloading with a series of right hands. Woehrle literally throws Ricky off of Muraco and Monsoon gets pissed. Dick does it twice more and Ricky goes upstairs, executing the big chop. Fuji hops up on the apron and Ricky grabs his cane. Woehrle tries to wrestle the cane away as Fuji reaches into his hat and hands a pair of brass knuckles to Muraco. Sure enough, Ricky sends Muraco off who eats a big chop. Ricky goes for another chop but Muraco sneaks a punch to the throat, then falls ontop of Steamboat for 1….2….3. Muraco wins it! Great match…but what the hell? Did Piper, Andre or Hogan lose on their profile tapes? No? So why did Steamboat? Wow, who the hell thought that was a good idea? We cut here so even if Ricky beat him up after the bell, we won’t see it. So Ricky gets hung and Muraco gets the last word? Wow….not a great booking job for this tape at all.

Time of match: Joined in progress

Winner: Don Muraco by pinfall

We now go to a special Piper’s Pit with Ricky in the rare blue trunks, a purple warm up jacket and white boots with “Cowboy” Bob Orton standing behind Roddy Piper (in standard Pit gear). Piper sarcastically calls Ricky a new heart-throb but Piper says he’s just as hot. Piper says Ricky hasn’t had a match longer than 5 minutes and wonders why he hasn’t wrestled anyone good yet. He also calls Ricky a cheater for using martial arts just like Ventura did earlier. Piper “You may be fooling them, but you’re not fooling me for a second.”  Ricky “Well I’m sorry about that RODNEY.” Piper gets pissed and says “My name is Roderick, short for Roderick the Conquerer” Ricky “Oh, I’m sorry Conker.” Piper “That’s Conquerer! My name is Roddy Piper!” Ricky “Well what is it, Roddy, Piper or Conker?” Piper “I’ll tell ya what it is!” Orton slowly makes his way over and he and Piper sandwich Steamboat while Piper taunts him. Ricky sheds his jacket and Piper looks ready to go….and we cut. OH COME ON!!! That looked to be heading somewhere but instead we cut HERE? We had to watch the ridiculous training video in its entirety but THIS got clipped? What the hell ever…on to the next match.
Match 5

Ricky Steamboat vs Davey Boy Smith

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Jesse Ventura

If cutting Piper’s Pit wasn’t bad enough, we’re ending the tape with two matches we’ve already seen. Steamboat’s two matches from WRESTLING CLASSIC. So yes, another loss is coming up. First he goes up against Davey Boy in the first round. I’ll just re-post from the earlier Classic post. Davey is in the long red tights while Steamboat is in the long black. They shake hands to start the match then go through standard go-behinds. Davey hiplocks Steamboat to the ground. Davey Boy back drops Ricky in a pinfall position for 1….2…nope, Dragon bridges out of it and turns it into a backslide for 1…nah. Steamboat runs off the ropes into a overhead press slam. Davey covers for a near fall then applies a front headlock as Ventura says Stemboat’s giving up a lot of strength to Bulldog. Davey hits another overhead press slam for another 2 count as Monsoon scoffs at Davey for not hooking the leg. Davey goes for a suplex but Steamboat counters with a delayed suplex of his own…..Davey Boy’s trademark. Ricky goes for a splash but Bulldog gets the knees up to counter. Davey Boy executes two standing dropkicks which send Steamboat into the ropes. Bulldog goes for a third dropkick but Ricky moves out of the way and Davey Boy crotches himself on the top rope. The ref runs over, checks on Davey and calls for the bell……what the hell? Steamboat also goes and checks on Davey Boy as the ref awards the match to Dragon…..first and last time I’ve ever seen a match end this way. Cheap ending but it was a good match for a 3 minute crash style. Monsoon says Ricky didn’t want to win this way and Ventura scoffs. We go to the replay and Ventura calls what we just saw.

Time of match: 2:54

Winner: Ricky Steamboat by stoppage
We don’t bother with a segue, onto the final match of the tape.

Match 6

Ricky Steamboat vs “Macho Man” Randy Savage (with Elizabeth)

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Jesse Ventura

Once again I have no idea we’re ending the tape with another loss but what the hell. I’ll go with another re-post. Randy comes out to Pomp and Circumstance and the purple trunks. Ricky is in the long black tights. Before the match Savage sticks a finger into Ricky’s face who slaps it away then Savage runs and hides behind Elizabeth, heh what a heel. Stemboat turns his back so Savage attacks him from behind while still wearing his headband and cape. Steamboat slides under Savage and chops him through the ropes to the outside. Randy pulls Ricky out and brawls with him outside before they roll back in. Savage takes over on offense with right hands in the corner until Steamboat counters with a head scissors over the top rope to the floor.  Steamboat chops Savage on the floor then atomic drops him to the concrete. Ricky throws him inside then hits his karate chop to the chest of a running Macho Man. Savage ducks under a second chop and delivers a back suplex as Ventura makes his way back to the commentating table. Savage goes upstairs but Ricky catches him in the gut with a right hand then delivers a knee lift. Steamboat unloads with a series of fists drops then suplexes Savage halfway across the ring. Steamboat goes upstairs and hits THE FLYING CROSSBODY for 1…2…thre…no wait, Savage kicked out at 2. Ventura is openly cheering for Savage and Steamboat chops and punches Savage to the ring apron. Savage reaches into his tights for a Foreign Object and when Steamboat goes for a back suplex, Savage nails Ricky with whatever he had. Savage covers for 1….2…THREE???? You gotta be kidding, that was WAY too short for 2 guys as talented as they were. It was going good too, damn…..should have been much longer. Monsoon says that Ventura gave Savage brass knuckles in the back as Ventura scoffs.
Time of match: an unacceptable 3:26

Winner: Randy Savage by pinfall

We end the tape with the credits and the previews but I don’t care. I still don’t understand why in a 6 match tape, 2 losses were included. You didn’t see Piper, Andre or Hogan losing so why did Steamboat get the shaft? Guess Vince was once again trying to make the NWA look bad by having one of their top stars look inferior to Hogan and Andre. Still, the immense talent of Steamboat saved him from obscurity, even after Randy Savage appeared from Memphis and took the IC title away from Tito Santana. As sad as it sounds, Steamboat’s tape came out in early 1986 and he’d still have 2 years worth of good matches (including one special) still to come. Did I like the tape? For the most part yes, but again, you want to make your stars look as good as possible…YOU DON’T SHOW THEM LOSING! I mean, everyone has to lose at some point to put someone else over, and Steamboat had no problem with that…but there’s a time and a place for that. I give this tape 3 stars out of 5….1 point off for the losses and 1 point off for it only being 80 minutes long. They could have squeezed 10 more minutes of footage in there. The next tape after this is BEST OF THE WWF VOLUME 6, hopefully Steamboat will have better luck on that one.

Best of the WWF Volume 1 (WF003)

BEST OF THE WWF VOLUME 1 (WF003)

After BLOOPERS, BLEEPS AND BODYSLAMS and HULKAMANIA hit the shelves, it was time for Vince McMahon Jr to follow up with some REAL action. The first tape was a silly look at wrestling while the second was an exclusive look at Hulk Hogan. Now it was time to showcase the past and present in the first installment of the “best of” series. For historical purposes I’ll guess that this tape was released in March of 1985. We begin with the now standard Coliseum Video opening before being chosen by our host, Vince himself wearing a decent suit for once. He previews all of the matches we’re going to see (and some of them are damn good actually). Now with anything labeled “Best of” I’m skeptical on how things will turn out. I will be judging the matches not just for quality but for importance as well. After all, if this is a ”best of”  tape the action better be legendary. Before we go to the handicap match, we’re treated to an interview with Hogan and Andre The Giant. Hulk warns the crowd of the impending destruction during the match and the man standing next to him is NOT Andre the Giant, he will referred to as “The Boss”. Andre used to call people boss and people referred to him as “boss” so Hogan’s statement is accurate. Hogan hypes up Andre and lets him say a few words. Andre brings up a past cage match between himself and Studd and saying there’s no cage this time, nowhere to hide. Andre says Hulk will take care of the tag champs and Hogan agrees. There were no dudes, mans, jacks or brothers in that promo. Damn, I grew up in the wrong era.

Match 1

The North-South Connection (Adrian Adonis & Dick Murdoch) and “Big” John Studd vs Hulk Hogan and Andre The Giant

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Ken Resnick

We go back to July 15, 1984 at the Brendan Byrne Arena in East Rutherford, NJ for this big matchup. Adonis and Murdoch were the reigning WWF Tag Team Champions and Studd was probably the only one who could match power with Hogan and size with Andre. The heels make their entrance first and only Adonis is carrying a tag belt, Murdoch isn’t. They pass by Vince himself walking toward the arena and Studd playfully punches him in the chest. Hmmmmmm….Adonis starts giving ring announcer Gary Michael Cappetta shit as Monsoon calls Murdoch and Adrian “The Wrecking Crew”….No that’s not Gene and Ole Anderson there Gorilla. Hogan comes out in the white tights with Andre in the red. Referee Dick Kroll takes forever to start and when the bell rings, Adrian and Hogan start. The announce table is so close to the ring Andre nearly steps on Resnick’s monitor. Adonis and Hogan exchange hammerlocks before Adonis comes off the ropes only to be met by a chop to the chest by Andre from the apron. Hogan floors Adrian with a right hand but Adonis recovers to tag in Murdoch. Dick goes to work on the left arm before Studd tags in. We get a TAPE EDIT and now its Studd and Andre in the ring. Before anything happens we get another TAPE EDIT and Andre’s dazed outside while the tag champs have Hogan pinned down. Finally Murdoch leaves the ring and Hogan backs Adrian into the corner with knees to the gut. Hogan rams Adrian’s head into the babyface corner where Andre tags in. Andre drops Adrian with a  headbutt. Andre heaves Adrian into the corner where Adonis flips forward then down. Studd gets the tag and he carefully enters the ring. Andre slugs Studd then does his ass bump in the corner. Murdoch gets in and Andre puts him in the corner as well. Time for “giant football style” as Jesse The Body would say. Adonis gets in and goes for an axehandle but Andre blocks it and stacks him in the corner with the others. Andre sandwhiches the trio while Hogan joins Andre and looks like he’s dry humping the big guy. Adonis collapses as Dick staggers into the center of the ring where Andre sends him flying with a big right hand. Adonis retreats to the aprons and now its just Studd/Andre. John counters a backdrop with a big boot that drops Andre to one knee. If you look closely you can see Studd tagging Adrian but Murdoch gets in. Dick unloads with bionic elbows (remember he was the “other” half of the Texas Outlaws with Dusty Rhodes) and right hands. The heels make frequent tags and Murdoch delivers a modified top rope bulldog to Andre. Murdoch stomps away at the big man and we get another TAPE EDIT. Adonis has Andre down and Murdoch tags back in. Murdoch steals the tag rope and chokes Andre with it as Hogan gets in to protest. As the ref shoos Hogan away Adonis comes in to help Dick choke him. Once Adonis leaves, Dick drops the rope which Andre grabs, Murdoch slugs away at the big guy then measures him for a big punch. Murdoch comes off the rope only Andre catches him with the tag rope and wraps it around his throat for some payback. Hogan tags himself in and he catches an interfering Adonis then heaves Murdoch into him, Adonis does his reverse Andre spot….you know when Andre ties himself up in the ropes, well Adonis does it only he flips himself on the apron all tied up. Hogan sends Murdoch into Adonis again. Hogan slugs Studd then sends Dick into the corner, but the charge eats elbow. Another TAPE EDIT shows Adonis scoop slamming Hogan. Adrian drops a series of knees and elbows to the head then goes all the way up. Hogan catches him and drops him crotch first on the top rope. Adonis rolls to his corner and tags in Studd. John applies a front headlock then tags in Murdoch. Dick stomps away then sends Hogan off only for them to crash into each other. Andre gets the hot tag and he backdrops Murdoch. Adonis interferes and Andre rams his and Murdoch’s heads together. Hogan intercepts a charging Studd. A pier 6 brawl develops as Andre cleans out the champs then floors Studd with a headbutt. Studd bails to the back as Andre gives chase. The champs double team Hogan inside the ring but soon Andre comes back. Studd’s nowhere to be found so now its down to 2 on 2. Hogan “Hulks Up” on Murdoch before tagging in Andre. Andre floors Murdoch with a big boot then sits on him. Hogan intercepts Adrian as the ref counts 1….2…3 and its over. Hogan and Andre prevail as the crowd cheers. Does this belong on a tape like this? For its time period, yes.

Time of Match: An edited 9:30

Winners: Hogan and Andre by pinfall

Vince sends us to a legendary women’s title match between Wendi Richter and Fabulous Moolah from July 23, 1984. Before we get to that we’re sent to an interview with “Mean” Gene Okerlund who’s bringing Captain Lou Albano and Moolah out. Albano rants and raves but calls her “often imitated, never duplicated” and ain’t that the truth. Nowadays “divas” are supposed to be beautiful as well as tough. Moolah was certainly attractive in her day but she was absolutely tough as nails. If she was in her prime today, she’d beat the ever loving shit out of every diva on the roster. Hell, this match was the day after she turned 61 years old (happy birthday Moolah) and she’s still in shape and kicking ass. Moolah says hi to her friends AND enemies and that she’ll come out on top. Albano goes to rant again but Gene cuts him off saying Cindy Lauper has Richter ready to go but Moolah scoffs. Albano says she’s held the belt for 12 years and Moolah says “27 years” which causes Albano to apologize. That was no joke either, due to shortage of ladies wrestling and because she was the best, Moolah really did have the belt since the Capitol Wrestling days of 1956.

Match 2:

Wendi Richter (with Cindy Lauper) vs Fabulous Moolah (with Lou Albano) for the WWF Women’s Championship

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Gene Okerlund

8 days after the last match (July 23^rd now), we’re in Madison Square Garden for the dawning of the Rock N Wrestling era. Lauper had aligned herself with Wendi Richter to get back at Albano for insulting her on Piper’s Pit. Moolah’s got the green tights on and Richter the pink. Bells gone and they trade armdrags. Okerlund brings David Wolff over to say how Albano was never Cindy’s manager..yeah, we know. Moolah gets in a kick to the mid-section and a right hand to the face. Moolah executes a series of hairgrab takeovers before sending her through the ropes and onto the announcer’s table. Wolff, Monsoon and Okerlund helps Wendi up as we get a TAPE EDIT. Now Wendi locks in an armbar as Monsoon calls Albano a fountain of mis-information. Wendi goes for a splash on the arm but Moolah rolls out of the way. Another TAPE EDIT shows Moolah with the upperhand, snapping Wendi throat first off the top rope. Moolah struts around the ring and poses for the crowd, looks great for turning 61 the day earlier. Moolah drops Wendi with a chop to the chest. A headbutt by Wendi sends Moolah backwards, all tied up in the ring roops. Richter kicks away before we get another TAPE EDIT and now Richter’s holding Moolah so Cindy can take a shot at her. Lauper works the crowd for a pop before walloping Moolah the best she can. The ref tells her to hit the bricks as Albano gets bent out of shape. Moolah nails Moolah with a dropkick and the cover actually gets 3 because Moolah doesn’t get a shoulder up but the ref, Richter and the announcers pretend it was 2. Richter turns a scoop slam into a suplex (nice) but the cover only gets 1. Another TAPE EDIT now shows Moolah backdropping Wendi into the center of the ring. A cover gets 1.2..nope, Moolah pulls her up for more torture. Good god ANOTHER TAPE EDIT shows Moolah ramming Wendi’s head into the corner a few times. Moolah turns a rolling prawn into a german suplex for 1…2….3 and its over. Moolah and Albano celebrate but not so fast! The alert referee noticed Richter’s arm came up at 2 so that means…oh yes, Wendi Richter is your new WWF Women’s champion, ending the 27 year reign of Moolah. Ring announcer Howard Finkel announces Richter the new champion, Gene Okerlund “Oh my word, oh my word!” Wolff and Lauper celebrate with the exhausted Richter as its pandemonium in the Garden. Moolah gets pissed and dropkicks the referee. She and the referee stomp him out of the ring in frustration. The ref recovers to raise Wendi’s hand as Albano and Moolah celebrate like she still won the match. Monsoon and Mean Gene finally notice the replay and it confirms Richter’s arm comes up at two. I can’t even rate the match because it was edited so badly but for what its worth, Richter was damn good and Moolah looked great for 61. A new era had begun and for a brief period, women’s wrestling would be taken seriously in MSG. Does this match belong on a tape like this, absolutely.

Time of match: A heavily edited 4:06

Winner: Wendi Richter by pinfall (New women’s champion)

We then go to one of the most famous segments in WWF history (that’s never mentioned anymore because most of today’s fanbase weren’t even born yet)

Match 3

Baron Mikel Scicluna vs Gorilla Monsoon

Commentator: Vince McMahon

Back in 1976, Monsoon was an active wrestler and today he’d be taking on the Madman from Malta. The ring announcer introduces heavyweight boxing legend Muhammad Ali in the front row before introducing the combatants. Monsoon gets a huge pop from the crowd but Scicluna attacks him before the bell.  The Baron attacks Monsoon in the corner with forearms. Finally Monsoon rallies with chops and right hands. Monsoon nails Scicluna on the top of the head with a slap then chops him over the top rope to the floor. All of a sudden Muhammad Ali pops up and takes his jacket off. Apparently Ali wants to go round to round with Monsoon as the crowd pops.

At this point Scicluna says the hell with it and leaves as the ref calls for the bell. Ali sheds his shirt, jacket and shoes as he climbs in the ring. Monsoon twirls his finger around his head and asks if Ali has gone crazy. Ali tries to stick and move with jabs as Monsoon laughs at him. Monsoon throws a jab himself and Ali continues to stick and move. Finally Monsoon grabs him by the arm and puts him in an airplane spin. Camera bulbs go off all over as Monsoon drops him back first. Monsoon circles Ali like a shark as Ali’s manager gets him out of there. Vince hypes up Ali saying he could whip any wrestler and Monsoon just proved otherwise. Vince leaps up from his broadcast position wearing a red suit to interview Monsoon. Monsoon says he’s a great boxer but had no business being in the wrestling ring. “This guy doesn’t know a wristlock from a wrist watch how can he get in there with a wrestler? All he knows is to throw a few lousy jabs, that’s not gonna stop a wrestler!” Vince takes a look at the replay and Monsoon says “Great boxer, terrible, terrible as a wrestler.” My how times have changed. Muhammad Ali is considered by many to be the greatest heavyweight boxer of all time and he was humiliated by Gorilla Monsoon there. 33 years later the game’s greatest WELTERWEIGHT at the time, Floyd Mayweather, would step in the ring with Big Show. Show is significantly taller and a bit heavier than Monsoon. Senile Vince apparently forgot how he booked Ali/Monsoon decades earlier and had Floyd knock out Big Show. As for the forgotten third man, Scicluna was one of the top heels of the 60’s and 70’s plus was inducted into the WWF Hall of Fame in 1996. So we got 2 hall of fame wrestlers and a hall of fame boxer in one match, that certainly belongs on a tape like this.

Time of match: 48 seconds

Winner: Gorilla Monsoon by count-out.

We now go to a squash match featuring The Superfly…..huh?

Match 4

“Superfly” Jimmy Snuka vs Bobby Bass

Commentators: Jack Reynolds and King Kong Mosca

We’re on weekly WWF programming for this useless jobber match from sometime in 1984. Reynolds was a known broadcaster at the time and Mosca was an ex wrestler. Hell, think Bischoff and Mongo. Jimmy “Superfly” Snuka gets attacked at the opening bell. He gets whipped into the corner but leaps over a charging Bass. Snuka backdrops Bass then scoop slams him. A series of hiptosses from the Superfly frustrates Bobby to the point he bails to the outside. Back inside Bass applies a headlock and shoulderblocks Jimmy down. Snuka leaps over Bass then delivers a flying headbutt. Snuka delivers a backbreaker then goes upstairs. The crowd goes beserk as Snuka hits the Superfly Splash. The cover 1…2…3 and its over. Absolutely no idea what the purpose of having a jobber match on this tape was unless it was to show how awesome Snuka was. Does it belong on the tape? Hell no!

Time of match: 1:24

Winner: Jimmy Snuka by pinfall
Vince sends us to Piper’s Pit where “Rowdy” Roddy Piper interviews Snuka…..yes, THAT Piper’s Pit. Unfortunately its clipped so we don’t get the full interview. We’re at the part where Piper tells Snuka to put the microphone in Jimmy’s little greasy paws. Piper then says he’s going to make Jimmy feel at home, he picks up a pineapple from a brown paper bag. My favorite line “This pineapple is like the women from the Fiji Islands, long busty hair on top, round on the bottom.” Piper then pulls out a bunch of bananas and taunts Snuka with them. Piper with coconuts: “Here we go….one coconuttttt….two coconuttttttt…four coconutttts, ya wanna be a big shot? Ya know what, the only thing I didn’t get. I didn’t get a tree for you to climb up and down like a monkey, like ya wanna do. You want to be a big shot, I’ll get you a tree next time!” He then throws a banana in Snuka’s face and finally Jimmy speaks, softly. “Are you making fun of me?” Piper: “Am I making fun of you? No sir! No Sir!” At this point Piper smashes a coconut over Snuka’s head that sends him sprawling into the cheap Piper’s Pit set, knocking it down. Piper grabs a banana, kicks the set off Snuka and begins rubbing it in his face. Piper gets another banana, spits at him, then rubs another one in his face. Piper then takes his belt off and whacks Snuka in the back as a little box in the corner with a smiling Piper is shown. This must be the TNT replay of the incident rather than the actual broadcast. Piper keeps whipping Snuka repeatedly and taunting him to get up. Finally Snuka gets to his feet, screams in rage and chases Piper behind a locked door. Snuka pounds on the door but can’t get it open as Tito Santana and 2 others pry him away. Vince then sends us to the inevitable match this angle would lead to. Does this Piper’s Pit belong on this tape? HELL YEAH!

Match 5

“Rowdy” Roddy Piper vs “Superfly” Jimmy Snuka

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and “Lord” Alfred Hays

After the famous Piper’s Pit where Piper smashed a coconut over Snuka’s head, a match was in order. Nowadays it would be a week later on Raw or 3 weeks later on a pay per view but this match was in August of 1984, 5 months after Piper’s Pit. Madison Square Garden would be the scene and Snuka is wearing a loud pink shirt. After a LOT of stalling they trade blows in the ring until Snuka gets the upper hand. A karate chop drops Piper as the crowd explodes. A few more chops floors Piper again who begs off. Snuka delivers a jumping headbutt who drops and begs off. A headlocked punch staggers Roddy. They trade blows before Piper tries his own jumping headbutt and nearly knocks himself out. Monsoon “That was a mistake.” Piper follows up with a thumb to the eye, that worked. Piper does his own series of headlocked punches before doing a snapmare. Piper pounds away the Snuka on the mat as the ref tells him to watch the fist. Snuka rallies with a right hand and another chop to the chest. Snuka then chops Piper over the top rope to the floor. Snuka follows and rams Roddy’s head into the side of the ring. Snuka goes for a whip but Piper’s head accidentally gets caught behind the rope and it chokes him. Snuka plays off of it and Alfred says “Oh, what a good move!” Nice cover up boys. Snuka clubs away at Roddy then sends him off the ropes, only to catch him in a sleeper hold. Piper begins having a seizure then bails to the outside…with Snuka still applying the hold. Finally Piper breaks free by ramming Snuka backwards into the apron. Piper goes to ram Jimmy’s head into the post but Snuka counters last second. Snuka beats on him all around the ring. Piper grabs a steel chair but Jimmy grabs it from him then rams Roddy’s head into it. BRILLIANT! Piper is busted wide open as he retreats inside the ring. Piper bleeds and begs off from a screaming Snuka as the crowd is really into it. Snuka begins pounding away on Piper and the ref tries to pull him off to no avail. Snuka delivers a falling headbutt and goes upstairs. Piper gets to his feet and Snuka dives off, only to be caught by Roddy and dropped throat first on the top rope. Snuka stays there and Piper dumps him to the floor. The ref counts out Snuka and Piper’s your winner. I bet MSG was livid at that one but the tape cuts off there. Did this belong on the tape? Absolutely, you had a hot feud at the time that started from one of the all-time great moments in wrestling history.

Time of match: 6:12

Winner: Roddy Piper by count-out

Vince sends us to a junior heavyweight championship match…..what?

Match 6

The Cobra vs The Black Tiger for the WWF Junior Heavyweight Championship

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Gene Okerlund

How do I explain this one? When Vince bought Georgia Championship Wrestling away from Jim Barnett, he inherited the junior heavyweight champion Les Thornton. After booking Les for a few shows as the Junior Heavyweight champion, for whatever reason he stripped Thornton of the title. This match was supposed to fill the vacant title on December 28, 1984 in Madison Square Garden. Who the hell are these dudes though? Well the WWF defended its junior heavyweight title mostly in Japan. The Cobra is not Jeff Farmer (who’d later play The Cobra and the nWo Sting in WCW) but actually George Takano, a veteran of Stampede and NWA wrestling. He defeated none other than Davey Boy Smith to win the NWA junior title a year earlier. Who is Black Tiger? I’ll reveal him at the end. Fink bills Cobra from Japan weighing 225 pounds but the graphic on screen says 220. Black Tiger is billed from England weighing 220….hmmm, there’s your first clue. Cobra is a good few inches taller than Tiger and they circle to start. Cobra applies a hammerlock but Tiger spins out of it then drops Cobra with a series of takedowns. Tiger drops an elbow and locks in a rest-hold. Cobra reverses into a hammerlock, Tiger switches but Cobra again brings him down with a hammerlock. TAPE EDIT and now Tiger has Cobra in a leg-lock. Back to a reverse chinlock until Cobra makes it to his feet. In what would be used on the opening Coliseum Video montage, Black Tiger nails Cobra with a stiff clothesline. Hmm, junior heavyweight from England that uses stiff clotheslines, ringing a bell yet? Tiger sommersaults onto Cobra and covers but Cobra kicks out immediately. Tiger runs right into a back drop and Cobra applies a rest-hold. Cobra goes to work then goes up to the top only for Tiger to catch him in mid-air….and let Cobra down on his feet. Cobra then does a spinning wheel kick that catches Tiger in the ribs. Cobra drops a second rope knee drop then executes a gut-wrench suplex. A cover gets 1…2..no. Cobra catches Tiger in a crucifix for a deuce then applies a head scissors. Tiger then nips up and backs into the corner. Cobra fakes locking up then kicks Tiger in the ribs then delivers a gut buster. Cobra locks in a Boston crab then turns it into a Luchador Special (I’ll explain another time)….something unheard of in 1984 American wrestling. We get a TAPE EDIT and now Cobra breaks a full nelson then kicks Tiger in the head. Cobra sends Black Tiger to the floor with a dropkick where Tiger hops on the apron, nails Cobra then goes upstairs. In another clip that would be used in the Coliseum Video montage, Cobra slams Tiger off the top rope. Cobra locks in another head scissors before Tiger powers out of it. Tiger applies a headlock but is floored with a shoulderblock off the ropes. Tiger nips up and decks Cobra with another stiff arm clothesline. Tiger stops to nod at the crowd then drops a knee and covers for 1…2..nope. Tiger executes a swinging neckbreaker but we get another TAPE EDIT and now both men are down. Once they get to their feet, Cobra nearly takes Tiger’s head off with a spinning wheel kick. The cover gets a deuce and Cobra nails Tiger with a standing dropkick that sends Tiger through the ropes and to the outside. Cobra bounces off the ropes and SUICIDE DIVES through the ropes and onto Tiger. After another TAPE EDIT, Cobra is in the ring and Tiger drops him with a right hand from the apron. Tiger goes upstairs and splashes Cobra, gets up, nods at the crowd and executes a floatover suplex for 1…2..nope. Tiger picks up Cobra in a scoop slam position but modifies it to a tombstone, ouch. The cover gets a deuce and Tiger goes for another tombstone only for Cobra to reverse it. Cobra nails Tiger with the tombstone then goes upstairs. Cobra senton bombs (yes in 1984) Tiger then covers for 1…2…3 and its over. The crowd pops for a match that was 12 years ahead of its time. Fink presents the belt to Cobra. Cobra goes to shake Tiger’s hand but Tiger nails him in the chest with a forearm. What looks to be a sore loser angle is ruined because the segment cuts right then. Still, that match was right on par with the WCW cruiserweight matches that wouldn’t take place for a dozen years. Outstanding effort by both men although Cobra was pulling moves that were years ahead of their time. As for the Black Tiger….British light heavyweight with stiff clotheslines and a great suplex. If you haven’t guessed yet, it’s Mark “Rollerball” Rocco! What, were you expecting Dynamite Kid? Anyway as for the match deserving to be on this tape, definitely yes. It was a revolutionary match that wouldn’t be commonplace for at least a decade.

Time of match: A heavily edited 6:58

Winner: The Cobra by pinfall (New Junior Heavyweight champion)

We go from a great junior heavyweight match to one of the most infamous skits in professional wrestling history. Somehow Hulk Hogan decided on “Mean” Gene Okerlund to be his tag team partner in a match against George “The Animal” Steele and Mr.Fuji. Instead of just having the match, we now are forced to sit through their training segments. We begin with a graphic showing its Day 1. Mean Gene is sitting at his kitchen table smoking a cigar and reading the paper as Hulk barges in and yells at him. Gene whines and says its 5 in the morning but Hogan rips the cigar and cup of coffee out of Gene’s mouth. Gene says he’s going to have bacon, eggs and pancakes for breakfast and Hogan will have none of it. Hogan then cracks 3 raw eggs into a glass for Gene and then one glass for himself. Hogan says they’re going to do this every 2 hours while in training. For some reason they edit out Gene actually drinking the eggs but anyway, he’s ready to go. Now we cut to Hogan and Gene running around one of the Minnesota lakes as fans legitimately cheer them on. Hogan doesn’t appear to be winded at all while Okerlund looks ready for a stretcher. Hogan is wearing his Hulkamania t-shirt and red jogging shorts, Gene is wearing the same only his shirt has sleeves on it. Hulk is barely breaking a sweat as they run around the lake but Gene struggles. Now Gene and Hulk are running through the streets of Minneapolis except now Hogan is wearing blue spandex pants and Gene as a blue hat with visor and a blue/white t-shirt. Gene stops for a beer and a braut but Hogan stops him and says get back to work. Ok, have to admit THAT part was funny. We get a graphic saying its Day 2 and Gene and Hulk are now hanging around the Olympia Gym. Mean gene is wearing a sleeveless black shirt that says Hulk-A-Mania while Hogan is wearing a red sleeveless shirt that says Mean Gene-O-Mania. Gene doubts himself but Hogan gives him a pep talk before working out. The Olympia Gym was a legitimate gym located at 2604 Lyndale Avenue in Minneapolis. Gene and Hulk work out to the Coliseum Video opening theme as several gym patrons cheer them on. We get a graphic saying Day 3 as Gene is back in his kitchen reading the paper in a blue bathrobe when Hulk barges in again. Apparently its 6 AM and time to train, you’d think Gene would have put locks on his doors at this point. Today Hulk and Gene are running up the steps of an empty arena. Hulk in just red shorts and Gene in red shorts and a white t-shirt. Hulk carries Gene on his shoulders up the stairs and says Gene is next much to Gene’s dismay. Now we see Gene struggling to go up the stairs with Hogan on his back. If you were taking this out of context, with Gene’s repeated cries “Oh, Hulk. Oh, Hulk”  you’d think this would be REALLY gay. Now we get a graphic for Day 4 and Hulk is making Gene wheelbarrow up the steps with Hulk saying Gene-O-Mania is running wild. Finally Gene makes it all the way up the stairs and says “Hulk, we got it!” They look out over Minnesota and it’s a nice view actually. As the theme blares again, Hulk and Gene run up the steps of the state capitol in perfect rhythm and Gene jumps into Hogan’s arms. Gene thanks a bunch of people but most likely due to legal reasons, he’s edited out and he says they’re ready for Fuji and Steele at the Met Center. Now that we’ve survived this, let’s get to the actual match.

Match 7

George “The Animal” Steele and Mr. Fuji vs “Mean” Gene Okerlund and Hulk Hogan

Commentator: Vince McMahon

August 26, 1984 was the epic showdown between Hulk and Gene against Steele and Fuji. After Okerlund and Hogan’s quasi-homosexual training sessions, let’s hope this match is short and sweet. We’re at the Met Center in Minneapolis, MN which is pretty much a homecoming for Hulk and Gene since they both came from the AWA. Hogan enters wearing the blue tights and Mean Gene-O-Mania t-shirt while Okerlund enters with black tights and Hulk-A-Mania on his t-shirt. Gene is also carrying Hogan’s belt, isn’t that nice of him? Hogan rips Okerlund’s shirt off and he looks ridiculous. Actually now that I think about it, Mr. Fuji was 49 years old, Steele was 47 and Okerlund was 41. Hogan had just turned 31 fifteen days earlier meaning he’s technically in his prime. Hogan and Fuji start and Fuji gets the upperhand in the corner with chops. Hogan ducks under one, slugs Fuji, sends him off the corner and hiptosses him. Fuji charges and Hogan scoop slams him. Fuji scrambles for the tag and Steele tries to intimidate Hulk with his signature taunt, only for Hogan to turn around and tell Steele to kiss his ass. We get a TAPE EDIT and now Hogan is down with Steele stalking him. Steele pounds away on the Hulkster but Hogan Hulks Up quickly and floors both George and an interfering Fuji. Many fans can (and should) make fun of Hogan for wrestling too long past his prime but back in 1984 Hulk really did rule. His offense was crisp, his Hulk Up’s weren’t routine and his promos weren’t cliché. Hogan follows the heels to the floor and drops both of them then struts in the ring. Okerlund stomps on Fuji’s hand for good measure. Hogan high fives Okerlund excessively and the referee constitutes that as a tag. This means, oh yes, Okerlund now has to wrestle Steele. D’OH! Hogan protests brother but the ref will have none of it and orders Okerlund in the ring. Steele taunts Gene then backs him into the corner. George charges but Gene crawls under his legs and makes the tag to Hulk. Steele begs off and Hulk bashes him into the corner. He grabs Fuji and rams his and Steele’s heads together.  We get a TAPE EDIT and now Fuji is in the ring getting clobbered. Hulk atomic drops Steele as Fuji reaches into his tights for salt. Gene, from the apron, knocks the salt from Fuji’s hand. Hogan whips Fuji off into the knee of Okerlund, dropping Fuji. Hogan tags in Mean Gene and picks him up from outside and slams him on top of Fuji. Hogan from the outside puts his hand directly on Okerlund’s ass as the ref counts 1…2..3 and this fiasco is over. Jesse “The Body” Ventura comes out of nowhere to protest as Hogan and Okerlund clean house of Fuji and Steele. Okerlund jumps into Hogan’s arms and they do many questionable high fives. They pose for the crowd as the segment ends. Was this deserving to be on the tape, unfortunately yes. This was one of the most talked about segment/matches for years and years good or bad. If people are still talking about it, its legendary.

Time of match: Who gives a damn?

Winners: Hogan and Okerlund by pinfall

We now cut to the set-up match for one of the hottest pre-Hulkamania angles WWWF did during the final years of Vince Sr.

Match 8

Larry Zybysko vs “Living Legend” Bruno Sammartino

Commentator: Vince McMahon

This was billed as teacher vs student as Bruno had actually trained Larry in the early 70’s. This match was on January 22, 1980 in Allentown, PA and the 28 year old Larry tries to best his 44 year old mentor. Zybysko has red tights and a full head of blonde hair while Bruno enters wearing the blue tights with a full head of hair as well. They tie up twice and both times Bruno backs Larry into the ropes but breaks clean. Zybysko nearly catches Bruno with an outside shot but Bruno avoids it. Zybysko executes a nice go-behind but Bruno switches. Zybysko tries a standing switch then a sit-out but Bruno’s wrist control is too strong. Bruno releases the hold and Zybysko looks at him as if to say “What did you do that for?” Bruno gets a side headlock but Larry tosses him off the ropes then delivers a hiptoss. Larry covers for a deuce and Bruno powers out of it. Larry applies a headlock then floors Bruno with a shoulderblock. Zybysko runs off the ropes but right into a drop-toe-hold by Sammartino. Larry scoop slams Bruno then covers for a loud 2 count. Bruno counters with his own scoop slam and Larry gets up frustrated. Larry tries a got behind but Bruno catches the wrist and begins fighting it off. Bruno goes for a side wrist-lock but Zybysko alertly turns it into an abdominal stretch. Bruno hiptosses Larry after a bit and Vince speculates that Zybysko is angry at himself….not exactly. Zybysko catches Bruno with another scoop slam and covers for another near-fall. Zybsyko picks the near ankle and turns it into a half crab. Bruno squirms loose then drops Zybysko with a toe hold, only to release it. The crowd applauds the chain of events before Bruno applies a top wristlock but releases the hold when Zybysko struggles. Larry doesn’t like it but ties up again only to get headlocked. They criss cross and Larry goes for another hiptoss but this time Bruno counters with one of his own. Larry pounds the mat in frustration and looks up at his mentor with a look of disdain. They circle and Larry gets a side headlock then drops Bruno with a shoulderblock. Zybysko tries to garner momentum only to run right into a bear-hug. Zybysko screams out so Bruno lets him go. Zybysko gets even more frustrated at Bruno for showing mercy and Bruno looks at him confused. Larry ducks under a forearm to apply a hammerlock. Bruno looks to escape but his switch ends up dropping Larry through the ropes to the outside. Bruno holds the ropes for Larry but Zybysko catches him with a knee to the gut on his way back in the ring. Larry pounds away with forearms to the back then stomps to the chest. Larry rams Bruno’s head into the turnbuckle as the crowd begins booing the dastardly tactics. Larry goes outside and grabs a wooden chair as Vince freaks out. The ref tries to stop him but Larry throws him through the ropes to the outside to earn the DQ. Larry then whacks Bruno in the head with the chair and Sammartino blades…really badly. By badly as in he’s bleeding all over the ring. Zybysko hits him twice more and then throws the chair down in frustration. He leaves to a chorus of boos as the ref tends to the bloody mess left behind. This was the start of a red hot feud that would last throughout most of 1980. The match itself was classic storytelling that’s lost on most of today’s braindead fans. Modern day fans expect spotfests and 20 minutes of posing but what I just saw was very entertaining without spots and posing. Does this belong on this tape? Yes only because it set up the next match.

Time of match: 9:16

Winner: Bruno Sammartino by DQ

Before we go to the final match of the tape, we go to Bruno’s “weigh-in” for the “Showdown at Shea”. Back then the WWWF still tried to look somewhat legit by having weigh-ins and Bruno enters wearing blue tights and flip flops.  Vince is wearing a horrific yellow polyester jacket and green pants. I know it was 1980 but gadzooks! Vince interviews Bruno saying both he and Larry are in terrific shape although Bruno says he’s going to destroy Zybysko. Vince asks him about the upcoming cage match and Bruno says he’s going to win. I didn’t notice at first but Kerry at thewrestlingfan.com pointed out that doctor in the ring was George Zahorian. Dr Z was the doctor that supplied nearly every wrestler in the 80’s and early 90’s with steroids. Now let’s get to the main event of the tape.

Match 9

Larry Zybysko vs “Living Legend” Bruno Sammartino (with Arnold Skaaland) in a Steel Cage Match

Commentator: Vince McMahon

The “Showdown at Shea” which drew over 36,000 fans to Shea Stadium occurred on August 9, 1980. Larry’s heel turn and subsequent bloodying of Bruno was the talk of the wrestling world in 1980. Freddie Blassie, Captain Lou and Grand Wizard all made pitches for Larry to join their stables but Larry turned them all down, he wanted to destroy Bruno and he wanted to do it alone. This would never happen now but after the beat-down of Bruno, fans destroyed Larry’s car, turned over taxis he was riding in, stabbing him in the ass and nailed with an iron pipe. That’s how legitimate WWWF used to be. Larry and Bruno would work matches and fans believed them to be real as opposed to now where morons on the independent circuit hurt each other for real and nobody cares. Bruno enters the cage wearing the blue tights with Larry in the red. Larry attacks as Bruno attempts to enter the cage but a boot to the mid-section sends Zybysko flying. Bruno boots his former pupil in the head then rams him right into the cage. Bruno sends him crashing, head first into the cage again then puts the boots to him. Bruno caters to the crowd as we get a TAPE EDIT although Bruno is still stomping away on Larry. Bruno chokes Larry on the second rope then rakes his face across the cage. At this point the camera pauses on this image even though action is still going on with Vince calling it. Once the production crew wakes up, Larry punches Bruno in the nads.  Bruno crawls around as Larry goes to escape the cage. He gets halfway out before a lunging Bruno pulls him back in. Now it’s Larry’s turn to throw Bruno face first into the cage. We get another TAPE EDIT and when we resume Larry rams Bruno’s head into the cage once again. Bruno sells a left arm injury as Larry looks to escape over the top. Sammartino pulls him off the top with his one good arm (and THIS is why you don’t edit matches. I have no idea why Bruno’s selling an arm injury because the edited match hasn’t shown any arm moves). ANOTHER TAPE EDIT has Larry dropping Sammartino with a right hand. Bruno ducks under a right hand, goes behind and delivers a knee to the hamstrings. Another TAPE EDIT shows Bruno choking out Larry. Zybysko goes upstairs but Sammartino catches him and slams him in the center of the ring. We get another TAPE EDIT (way too many) and now Bruno is clutching his right arm as Larry taunts him. Camera zooms in to show Bruno’s arm is badly lacerated. Larry batters Bruno in the corner then goes to escape. Vince says Larry would be “The New Living Legend” if he escapes. Well he didn’t escape as Bruno stops him last second but he would bill himself as “Living Legend” Larry Zybysko throughout his entire 90’s WCW run. Zybysko goes to attack Bruno in the corner when we get yet another TAPE EDIT. I’ve had about enough of this really. Bruno drags Larry through the ropes and rams him into the ringpost. Another TAPE EDIT has me throwing my hands up as Bruno throws Larry against the cage. Bruno throws the bloody Zybysko over the top rope into the cage, grabs him then throws him into the other side of the cage. Zybysko is out of it as Bruno calls for the cage to be opened. Zybysko staggers to his feet and Bruno gestures at Larry saying “The hell with you” and walks out the door. Bruno wins it as the ref raises his left arm. Arnold Skaaland goes to raise Bruno’s right which causes him to cry out in pain, either he’s really hurt or a terrific seller. A lost art today. Larry protests and staggers out of the cage pointing at him. Larry walks toward Bruno and stares at him before Bruno whacks him in the face twice. Larry raises Bruno’s arm as a sign of respect but Bruno pulls it down and walks away. Larry was going for the slow, face turn but Bruno was not in a forgiving mood. Overall this one of the best drawing angles the WWWF ever did and it was capped off correctly with the babyface brutalizing the heel in a cage. As it stands, this was the beginning of the end for Bruno. Zybysko would leave the company shortly after to wrestle for Georgia Championship Wrestling and Bruno settled into a semi-retirement. Oh and one last thing, Hogan takes credit in his autobiography that he and Andre were the reason for the sold out crowd at Shea. Once again his egotism gets in the way of reality. Hogan was just a heel back then, Andre could have wrestled “Crazy” Luke Graham and it wouldn’t have made a difference. Bruno and Larry were THE talk of the wrestling world in 1980 with house shows and mega-cards being sold out with them headlining. Bruno and Larry were the main event for a reason and THEY drew the house despite what the almighty Hulkster claims. Does this match belong on this tape, HELL YES!

Time of match: A heavily edited 6:51 (real time was 15:10)

Winner: Bruno Sammartino

That’s it for the tape as we get the orchestral end credits. Once again the message that the matches were edited for entertainment purposes appears. I don’t know why they did that, they had a full 2 hours on the cassette and this didn’t even top 90 minutes. They could have shown the Bruno/Larry cage in its entirety and still had room. After the credits we get a sneak preview for BEST OF THE WWF VOLUME 2, ANDRE THE GIANT and MOST UNUSUAL MATCHES. As for this tape, now THAT’S more like it. This was supposed to be the “best” of what they had to offer and that’s exactly what they delivered. Every angle and match was legendary either good or bad and some of them were huge draws such as Piper/Snuka and Zybysko/Sammartino. I give it 4 stars out of 5 and it would have been 5 out of 5 but the edits were too much, too many things were cut out. The next tape after this is the first WRESTLEMANIA.

Hulkamania 1 (WF002)

WWF HULKAMANIA (WF002)

The World Wrestling Federation made their home video debut with the experimental BLOOPERS, BLEEPS AND BODYSLAMS and this would be their follow up, a personal profile centered around their superstar champion Hulk Hogan. I’m unsure of the actual release date but I’ll take a guess and say February 1985. WRESTLEMANIA was the 4^th tape released and that wasn’t until April 85 most likely so this being the 2^nd tape, I’ll say February. Future tapes would center on top current action but this would be the first of many “profile” tapes and who better than your number one draw? Love him or hate him, Hogan was the top star and number one money maker so putting him on home video was a no brainer. Is the tape worth to watch though? That’s what I’m here to find out. As with the first tape, we get the opening Coliseum Video montage before Vince McMahon himself in a navy blue suit takes over to shill the action. We get a quick montage before being sent to the first match.

 

Match 1

Greg “The Hammer” Valentine vs Hulk Hogan for the WWF Heavyweight Championship

Commentator: Gorilla Monsoon

 Despite being groomed for the Intercontinental championship, Valentine goes for the big one at the Philadelphia Spectrum on August 4, 1984. Hogan does a voice-over before the match saying he was terrified of the figure-four. Valentine enters with the blue robe and black tights. Hogan wears the white t-shirt and tights. Ring announcer Mel Phillips is wearing one of the most ridiculous suits I’ve ever seen. Monsoon keeps referring to Valentine as the IC champ, which he was at the time of tape production but not during the actual match. Valentine starts with forearms and goes to ram Hogan’s head into the buckle but is blocked. Hogan rams Greg’s head then throws a series of jabs before Greg flops down. Hogan fires up the crowd before Greg regains his composure and calls for a test of strength. Hogan falls for it and is met with a knee to the gut that drops the champ. Greg works over Hulk in the corner with a series of knee drops before applying a reverse chinlock that Hogan barely sells. Hogan then gets up with Hammer on his back and falls backwards into the corner. Monsoon “That’s one way to get out of it.” Hogan delivers a headbutt then throws him into the corner where he nails him with a back elbow smash. Greg bails to regroup but Hogan follows him then continues to beat em’ up outside. Hogan throws Greg back inside who goes to town on Hulk as soon as the champ gets back in. Valentine scales the second rope then drives a forearm to the head. Valentine drops and elbow and covers for a 2 count. Valentine unloads on Hogan with fists, boots then a scoop slam. Valentine locks in a submission hold as Monsoon brings up the last time the title changed hands at the Spectrum was when Stan Stasiak defeated Pedro Morales. Greg continues to work over the legs to weaken him for the figure four. Valentine drags Hogan to the near side of the ring, bails, grabs a chair and hits Hulk in the knee with it. The ref does NOT call for the bell and Hammer goes back in. Hogan trips up Valentine to delay the figure four and starts Hulking Up when Valentine starts unloading with forearms. Hogan does 2 punches then sends Greg off for a big clothesline…hmm, that’s different. Valentine scoots to the apron but Hogan will have none of that as he suplexes him back in. The camera pans to the crowd where a big breasted Hogan fan jumps up and down. Can’t go wrong there. There’s an obvious TAPE EDIT that ruins the length of the match but whatever. Hogan delivers an atomic drop then taunts Hammer, but the send off eats a forearm to the back of the head. Hammer drops a series of elbows and forearms but a blatant choke gets  a “Hogan” chant from the partisan crowd. Another TAPE EDIT shows Valentine continuing to pummel Hulk with elbows. Greg goes upstairs but Hogan catches him and slams him off the top rope (which is one of the scenes in the opening Coliseum Video montage). Unfazed, Greg goes back to work on the left leg but Hogan blocks the figure four attempt. Valentine misses with an elbow drop as Hogan “Hulks Up” quickly. Hogan drops Valentine with a clothesline then drops the big leg. The cover gets 1…2…3 and it’s over, Hulk retains. After a brief celebration, Valentine motions that he’s ready for round 2. Valentine throws the referee into Hogan and grabs the title belt. Hogan actually throws the ref out of the way where he sails through the ropes and to the outside, what a humanitarian. Hogan grabs Valentine in a bear hug and beats on him in the corner. Valentine bails for good as Mel Phillips attends to the ref outside. For 1984 ring work, that’s pretty good. No complaints here, the tape edits kept the match flowing.

 

Time of Match: An unofficial 8:46

Winner: Hulk Hogan by pinfall (Still WWF Champion)

 

We head right to the next match.

 

Match 2

“Big” John Studd (with Bobby “The Brain” Heenan) vs Hulk Hogan for the WWF Heavyweight Championship

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Howard Finkel (yes, HIM)

    Hogan does a voice over before the match saying he didn’t know if he could slam the big man going in but blows the ending of the match saying Studd went up like a feather. We’re at the Brendan Byrne Arena (wasn’t named Continental Airlines for another 12 years) in East Rutherford, NJ on December 10, 1984 for this one. The ring announcer is Gary Michael Cappetta who actually would leave later the following year for a near decade stint in NWA/WCW. Hogan enters last wearing the yellow trunks as the graphic on the screen says “weight 364 lbs”…yeah right. The crowd explodes as referee Dick Woehrle tries in vain to get the two in neutral corners. Bells gone and they circle as Howard gets The Brain to explain if the 15 grand is on the line. Heenan “So far that money is still drawing interest!” So it’s a standard match but Hogan gets a 15 thousand dollar bonus if he slams Studd, got it. After about a minute they tie up and Studd goes to slam Hogan but is blocked. Hogan then tries to slam Studd but is also blocked. Heenan shouts advice to Studd but Hogan kicks at him to go away. Finkel “Heenan can make life miserable for Hulk Hogan”. Studd gets the upper hand with forearms to the back. A shoulderblock does nothing and they each fail to slam each other. Hogan ducks under an elbow smash attempt and clocks John with one. A series of jabs rocks the big guy before sending him off for the BIG BOOT…which barely fazes Studd. John blocks a bodyslam attempt and pounds away in the corner with forearms. Hogan blocks a whip so the champ rallies with right hands. A running clothesline dazes Studd and a body-slam attempt nearly works but Studd powers out last second. Hogan reverses a whip with a running clothesline in the corner. Another slam attempt nearly gets him but Studd makes it to the apron. The action spills outside where Studd rams Hulk’s head into Fink and Monsoon’s table. Yes, those two are actually there so this is no re-dub. Studd rams Hulk’s head into the ring post before sliding in to break the count. Hogan is busted open as Studd goes back to work outside, throwing Hogan into the steel guardrail. A “Hogan” chant breaks out as Studd floors Hogan with a forearm to the chest. Studd rolls Hulk back in then goes upstairs. Studd nails Hogan with a forearm to the back from off the top. Studd floors Hogan with an elbow smash. Studd goes for the cover but only gets 2. We get a TAPE EDIT and when we resume, Studd scoop slams Hogan then boots him through the ropes to the outside. Studd continues to kick away at Hogan’s attempts to get back in the ring until Hulk pulls John outside. Studd pounds on Hogan outside the ring until he Hulks Up on the floor. Hogan slams Studd and rolls back in as Woehrle completes the count. Hogan doesn’t get the 15 grand because the slam wasn’t done in the ring but he wins the match. After the match, Hogan goes to slam Woehrle but sets him down last second.

 

Time of Match:  An unofficial 7:52

Winner: Hulk Hogan by count-out (Still WWF Champion)

 

Now we go to the famous TNT skit where Hogan makes a protein shake. I covered a bit of it on BLOOPERS, BLEEPS AND BODYSLAMS but I guess I have to go into full detail for this tape. Vince is wearing his pink herringbone suit while Alfred Hays has an impeccable bow-tie. Hogan talks about legit nutritional stuff like sugar energy burning too quick which means you need better stuff while training or wrestling. Hulk says he’s going to show his “Python Powder” which will turn Vince’s “garden snakes” into pythons. Hulk says to start out with spring water because “milk is for babies”. Then add in the powder. Idiot Hulk turns the blender on without the top on yet and it damn near explodes all over Alfred. He throws in a peach, a banana, some strawberries, 3 eggs (which he says you don’t need to crack it because the calcium is in the shell) one more spoonful of powder and a bit more spring water. Other than the mysterious powder, everything else is legitimate. He then pulls out a bag of pills that will “get Awful Alfred back into shape”. He pours his concoction for Alfred, Vince and himself and even McMahon is skeptical, asking Hogan if he’s gonna take all 12 pills. Hogan says you should talk all those vitamins first thing in the morning so you’re raring to go the rest of the day (normal vitamins yes, but I don’t want to know what he’s packing). Hogan takes a giant swig and downs all 12 pills “Not too bad” he says. Now it’s Alfred’s turn but he chickens out so Vince takes a swig instead. His face brightens up “That’s actually very good.” Hogan rants that if you train, take vitamins yadda yadda then he’s not responsible for your clothes ripping due to the increased muscle mass. He then makes fun of Vince’s pink suit as Vince is delighted to try the pills. In a shoot interview, Sunny claims Vince never had his talent do anything that he himself wouldn’t try so if Hogan’s not dropping dead, I doubt Vince will either. Unlike Hogan, Vince can’t swig all the pills in one gulp. Finally, Hogan demands Alfred try it. He takes a swig then goes to throw up. I’d say it was usual Hogan ballyhoo but there were some legitimate nutritional facts thrown in there, plus anytime Alfred’s in peril is always funny. On to the next one.

 

Match 3

“Dr. D” David Schultz vs Hulk Hogan for the WWF Heavyweight Championship

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and “Mean” Gene Okerlund

 Dr. D was the perfect heel for the time period but his attitude was unfortunately not very professional, which I’ll get to later. Hogan does a voice over calling him an arrogant redneck before the action starts. We’re at the badly lit Met Center in Minneapolis, Minnesota on June 17, 1984 for this one. Hogan dons the blue tights and poses for 3 minutes BEFORE THE MATCH. They go nose to nose at the opening bell and Hogans shouts invectives at him. D turns and walks away so Hogan does the same, PEARL HARBOR JOB by Schultz! Okerlund scoffs as D pounds away on Hogan in the corner. D chokes Hulk with Hogan’s own headband before clotheslining him with it. A cover gets 2 and he goes back to choking him with the band. Monsoon asks why the ref hasn’t grabbed the thing yet and right on cue, the ref does. Dr D covers but gets a 2. Up to the second rope goes D and he delivers a forearm smash. Schultz rams Hogan into the corner and goes to town, choking Hulk on the top rope. Maybe its just the lighting but Schultz looks exactly like Jeff Jarrett just with curly hair and the Andre half singlet. A forearm to the head drops Hogan through the ropes and to the outside. Dr. D grabs a chair and rams him in the head with it. Hogan is busted open and referee Joey Marella does absolutely nothing. Damn, refs were a lot more lenient in the 80’s than they were in the 90’s. Dr D stomps Hogan as he tries to enter and Hulk continues to bleed all over the floor. Back inside Schultz continues to stomp away before biting the open wound, Blassie would be proud. Schultz goes up to the second rope and drops an elbow. Monsoon says that was one of his trademark moves. Who does he think he is, Randy Savage? Actually, Schultz and Savage were tag team partners in Memphis before Vince stole Schultz. Well, Vince stole Randy (and Lanny to boot) too but Schultz went first. Schultz takes forever to cover but when he does, 1….2..HULK UP. Hogan no sells D’s offense then rakes the eyes (because he’s such a role model) and gets in his 3 punches plus a blatant choke for good measure. After a TAPE EDIT Hogan hits a running clothesline and the big…elbow. The cover gets 2 and Hogan pulls D up for more punishment. Hogan delivers some punches and scoop slams D. Hogan drops the leg and covers 1…2…..nope, he pulls Schultz up again. Hogan throws Schultz through the ropes and to the outside. Hogan then rams Schultz into the steel ring post. Now D is busted wide open as we get another TAPE EDIT. Back to live action Schultz counters a whip with a running clothesline. A forearm by D drops the champ then he goes upstairs. The flying elbow misses and Hogan gets up….only to have the action cut in favor of a slow motion replay of the elbow missing. What the hell was that about? Anyway, another Hulk Up leads to a running clothesline. The cover gets 1…2…3 and its over. Sheesh, couldn’t even take the leg drop? Hogan celebrates but Schultz nails him from behind. Schultz nails Hulk with the belt then puts it on his own waist.Hogan comes to, rakes the eyes then punches D down. Schultz bails and Hogan celebrates again. Okerlund leaves the announce booth to announce Hogan the winner. Where was Howard Finkel, in the bathroom? As I was saying earlier, Dr. D was one of the top heels on the roster but on December 28, 1984 he was suspended for attacking 20/20 reporter John Stossel. Stossel was at Madison Square Garden to do a story on “Is wrestling fake?” To which ol Schultz came over and started whacking him around asking him “Is THAT fake?”  between blows. I understand Schultz trying to protect the business but smacking someone around isn’t the way to do it. Hell 13 years later Vader was arrested in Kuwait for doing almost the same thing to a daytime TV host. Schultz was suspended but wasn’t fired, but he eventually did get fired for threatening Mr. T. The word on the street was he wanted to steal the Wrestlemania main event away from Roddy Piper but after Schultz cost Vince $425,000 in a lawsuit settlement with Stossel, McMahon cut his losses and let Dr. D go before Mr. T sued him too. Schultz was a great heel but he just didn’t know when to stop.

 

Time of match: An unofficial 8:57

Winner: Hulk Hogan by pinfall

 

No cutscenes, on to the next bout.

 

Match 4

“Big” John Studd vs Hulk Hogan in a Steel Cage Match for the WWF Heavyweight Championship

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon

     Howard Finkel calls this a “return bout” yet it’s from April 6, 1984 while the slam match earlier on the tape was 8 months later in December. We’re at the Kiel Auditorium in St. Louis, deep in the heart of NWA territory. Guys like Sam Mushnick must have thought Vince Jr was nuts to promote there but there’s a damn good turnout for this event. Studd enters by himself which means he wasn’t managed by Heenan yet as Hogan’s pre-match voiceover says he got sick of back and forth insults and decided to settle it inside a cage. Hogan comes out wearing the blue trunks and we don’t even get a stare down, we automatically TAPE EDIT to where the ring is loaded with garbage and Studd rams Hogan into the cage. Hogan is busted open for the third match in a row on this tape. Studd drops an elbow then crawls for the door but Hogan stops him last second. Hogan pulls him back inside and we get another TAPE EDIT. Hogan picks up Studd and rams Studd into the cage which busts Studd open then we get ANOTHER TAPE EDIT to Hogan ramming Studd chest first into the corner. A charging Hogan eats clothesline and Studd crawls for the door. Hogan catches him and pounds on him with right hands. Studd floors the champ with an elbow. Studd goes to the second rope and drops another forearm to the back. Studd goes for the door but collapses on the way. Studd squirms over but Hogan stops him in time. Studd rakes the eyes and sends him crashing into the cage. Studd staggers around as Monsoon says he can’t see with the blood in his eyes. Studd goes to climb the cage but Hulk stops him with fists. They trade blows but an eye rake stops the Hulkster. Hogan reverses a whip and sends Studd smashing into the cage. Hogan drops the big leg as Monsoon calls it “the big knee” by accident. Hulk crawls for the door but Studd stops him, Hogan boots John in the face then makes it out the door onto the floor to win the match. The partisan crowd goes wild as Studd wants more on the outside. They brawl but Hogan gets the upper hand. Well that was…different. They edited the living daylights out of it to keep the action moving but they left out too much action. Guess due to time constraints they had to cut all the matches short.

 

Time of match: A heavily edited 5:48

Winner: Hulk Hogan

 

We know go to an exclusive interview with Hogan for this specific tape conducted by Vince himself. Hogan is wearing a t-shirt with his own image on it while Vince ditches the herringbone suit for a normal blue suit coat. Vince asks Hulkster why he got into wrestling. He claims he was the greatest wrestling fan ever before he became the greatest wrestler ever (wow, no egotism there huh?) and he loves the 1 on 1 contact. Vince asks him what’s his attitude on training and Hulk calls him Mr. McMahon, 14 years too soon on that one. Hulk says positive thoughts, good food, good workouts, good sleep and the vitamins, etc yadda yadda. He does have a point saying when someone quits smoking and drinking then looks at themselves in the mirror they’ll see a change for the better. Vince asks him when wrestling became the profession of his life and Hogan gives a half-cockamamie story on when he was a little kid his father took him to see wrestling and he loves it, the truth is he became a fan at the age of 16 when he saw Dusty Rhodes at the Tampa Sportatorium in Eddie Graham’s Championship Wrestling from Florida. Later “Superstar” Billy Graham came to Florida and Hogan wanted to look as built as Billy did. Vince takes it a step further and asks if any one person influenced him the most and Hogan gives the kayfabed answer of Andre the Giant when, like I said, the REAL inspiration was the Superstar. Hogan hypes up Andre as the greatest thing since sliced bread. Vince asks if Hulk still has butterflies in his stomach before going to the ring, Hulk answers sometimes. He doesn’t want to let the little Hulksters down and he fears no man or evil. We then cut to the final match on the tape. Final count: Man – 2, Dude – 1, Brother – 0, Jack -0 so if you had the under you win. As expected, we’re treated to the explosion of Hulkamania into the mainstream by showing us the match with Iron Sheik. To give a bit of backstory, Hogan left Vince McMachon Sr’s WWWF to do the movie Rocky 3 in 1980 and Vince wouldn’t let him come back after he was done. Desperate for a job, he turned to Verne Gagne’s AWA where he made his debut in 1981 to thunderous cheers despite being a heel. Fans were so desperate for something new they cheered the heel. Soon, Hulkamania was born. From 1981 to 1983 Hogan ruled the AWA despite never being champion. He was due to win the title but egotism got in the way. Hogan was making extra money by working in Japan and selling merchandise, something new at the time. His “Hulk Rules” t-shirt was a big seller in Minnesota. Like a lot of old time promoters, Verne wanted a piece of the action and demanded Hogan give up a portion of his Japanese income. Hulk rightfully refused and Hulk was also displeased when Verne sold a bunch of Hogan t-shirts without giving Hulk his cut. In December of 83, Hogan was scheduled to win the AWA title from Nick Bockwinkel but he was growing increasingly unhappy with how Verne ran things. Enter Vince McMahon Jr, the new kid in town. Vince bought the company from his father, renamed it the WWF and wanted to go national. In the territorial era of wrestling, promoters never promoted in rival territories although they would exchange talent here and there. Vince said the hell with that and decided to promote shows wherever the hell he wanted. Simply booking shows in places like Nashville is one thing, doing so without the larger than life champion was a different story. He needed a larger than life star in order to go national. He had Andre the Giant but Andre was 37 years old in 1983 plus his giantism was beginning to affect his mobility. Vince then got wind that Hogan was unhappy in the AWA. Hulkamania had been running wild in the AWA but this was before Verne got on ESPN so Hogan wasn’t yet nationally known beyond Rocky 3. With Vince running Madison Square Garden and more importantly, New York City, Vince had the venue for Hulk’s star to shine brightest. After signing the Hulkster away from the AWA, now all Vince needed to do was put Hulkamania over. His current champion Bob Backlund was a great mat-based wrestler but he was about as exciting as last night’s toast. Vince wanted the title to be on Hogan but Backlund refused to job to someone without an amateur background. Not a problem Vince said, he asked if Bob was willing to put over the former 1971 AAU wrestling champion and member of the Iranian national team, Iron Sheik. Backlund said sure and was willing to drop it to him. On December 26, 1983, five year champion Bob Backlund was dethroned by Sheik. A week later Bob Backlund brought out Hulk Hogan on WWF television and put over Hulkster as the number 1 contender. There was one final bit of the story that was not revealed until years later. Verne Gagne was pissed beyond belief that Hogan would betray him and he called up his former protégé Sheik with a proposal; break Hogan’s leg and take the belt back to the AWA. It was Gagne who originally trained Sheik when he came over from Iran and Sheik actually helped train his son Greg. Sheik has done countless interviews saying he had to turn down Gagne because it was against his religion to bite the hand that fed him. In other words, Vince McMahon Jr had given Sheik the title and was paying him well, so it would be sacrilegious for Sheik to betray Vince. With Gagne out of the way, the rest is history.

 

Match 5

Hulk Hogan vs The Iron Sheik (with Ayatollah Blassie) for the WWF Heavyweight Championship

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Pat Patterson

  The match that started it all, the true dawning of Hulkamania in the national spotlight. This match came about when Bob Backlund was dethroned on December 26, 1983 by the Sheik. Rather than get his deserved rematch, Backlund brought out old Freddie Blassie crony Hulk Hogan. Hogan said he had denounced Blassie and was totally reformed, his mission was to destroy the Sheik and bring the belt back to the good guys. On January 23, 1984 Hogan met Sheik for the title in Madison Square Garden. Hogan crosses himself on his way out to the ring and guess who’s holding the curtain for him, 69 year old Vince McMahon Sr, dying of pancreatic cancer but fighting it long enough to see Hulkamania take off. If you pause your tape/dvd/etc to see that image, it’s an iconic one. The changing of the guard if you will. The regional territory era of Vince Sr is going by the wayside as Hulkamania sweeps the nation. It’s a shame the old man died when he did, he would have loved to have seen some of the gigantic crowds his son was about to draw. Sheik’s got the red trunks on. Hogan’s wearing his standard yellow trunks and a red t-shirt that says American Made on the front and Hulk-A-Mania on the back. After the introductions, Sheik turns to take his ring gear off but Hulk PEARL HARBOR’S him because he’s such a role model. Hogan sends Sheik into the corner with his robe still on and delivers an elbow smash. Hulk strangles Sheik with his own robe then sends him off and clotheslines him with the robe. The ref finally gets the robe away from Hogan. Hulk unloads in the corner then delivers a running clothesline. Hulk drops a knee to the throat, rakes the eyes and chokes him over his head. Hogan spits at Sheik and delivers the big boot. Hulk covers but the referee takes forever to get over there and Sheik kicks out at 1. Hogan drops Sheik with a running elbow then drops another elbow. Patterson goes crazy but the cover only gets 2. Hogan whips Sheik into the corner but misses a charge. Sheik finally gets an offensive move in 3 minutes into the match by stomping away at the Hulk. Hulk staggers to his feet and Sheik executes a backbreaker. Sheik covers but Hogan powers out at 2. Sheik goes back to work with boots to the chest then “loads up the boot”. Another boot leads to a Boston crab applied by the Sheik. Monsoon scoffs at the referee for being out of position but Hogan powers out of the hold. Pat wonders when Sheik will go for the camel clutch as he delivers a well executed gut-wrench suplex on Hogan. Another cover 1…2 and no. Sheik goes back to the boots to the kidney then locks in the camel clutch. Patterson says no one’s ever broken the hold as Monsoon says this is what did in Backlund a month earlier. Monsoon “Only the immense power of the Hulk can save him!” Hogan begins to Hulk Up and soon powers his way to his knees. Hogan stands up with Sheik on his back and rams him back in the corner. Sheik falls like a dead deer in the center of the ring. The crowd goes wild and Hogan drops the big leg! The cover gets 1…2…3 AND WE GOT A NEW CHAMPION! Madison Square Garden goes crazy as Hulkamania takes over New York City. Monsoon “History made in Madison Square Garden! Hulkamania….is here.” He wasn’t kidding, folks. Hogan kisses the belt (the same won worn by Backlund a month earlier before Sheik won it) as Fink announces Hogan the winner and new champ. Now Vince had his larger than life champion and the road to dominance was about to begin.

 

Time of match: 5:34

Winner: Hulk Hogan by pinfall (new WWF Champion)

 

The tape ends here with the orchestral ending montage as the credits roll. An explanation for why the matches were drastically cut is here. “The wrestling matches on this cassette have been edited to maximize their entertainment. Careful preservation of the spirit and integrity of the matches has been maintained.” I don’t know how cutting them up as badly as they did made them more entertaining but it sure made the action flow. Just like with the first tape, we end with a preview for BEST OF THE WWF VOLUME 2, ANDRE THE GIANT and MOST UNUSUAL MATCHES. I’ll get to those later. As for this, now that’s more like it. The tape was designed to feature Hogan in good matches and to showcase hot 1984 action. I mean Hogan was never a mat based wrestler so judging the tape from a technical standpoint is a waste of time. The crowd was hot and the action flowed, 3 stars out of 5. 2 points off because there was no Roddy Piper mentioned and the edits were too much. Next tape after this is BEST OF THE WWF VOLUME 1 as we finally get to see some REAL action, not a collection of TNT skits and Hogan profiles.