Villains of the Squared Circle (WF022)

 

VILLAINS OF THE SQUARED CIRCLE (WF022)

Like I had mentioned on ROWDY RODDY PIPER’S GREATEST HITS, the WWF had hit on a revolutionary concept. Showcasing the top babyface stars was nothing new in wrestling. From Verne Gage acting in The Wrestler, to Jerry Lawler being all over Memphis to WWF’s own Hulkamania. However, what all the regional territories failed to capitalize on was the other side of the spectrum. You didn’t see a Nick Bockwinkel t-shirt or video tape. You saw Lawler but was there a spotlight on Bill Dundee? There was no 4 Horseman tape in the Carolina’s. The WWF was the first to truly market and specialize the heels as well as the faces. We saw Roddy Piper get his own tape and some of the heel managers were highlighted in THE AMAZING MANAGERS but this one, we got em all. This tape is to showcase the villains both past and present that ran roughshod over the WWF. Will it be good to highlight the bad? Let’s find out. Cue the 1985 Coliseum Video opening and Mean Gene Okerlund is our host today….scratch that. He introduces guest hosts Bobby “The Brain” Heenan, King Kong Bundy and Big John Studd. Heenan says Okerlund to keep his mouth shut. Studd says he’s not a villain, he’s a very aggressive wrestler. Bundy says they’re winners. Okerlund and Heenan go back and forth and Studd says Okerlund is gonna get the splash before the tape is over. Okerlund runs down what we’re about to see as the truo howl with laughter. We then go to our first bout.
Match 1

Jake “The Snake” Roberts vs Scott McGee

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Alfred Hays and Ernie Ladd

April 22, 1986 in Madison Square Garden is the date and venue for this non-legendary squash match. Okerlund in the voiceover says Roberts is the newest heel in the WWF and Heenan scoffs at the terminology Okerlund uses to describe him. The bell sounds and Roberts is in the purple tights with green snake imprints while McGee is in the red trunks. Roberts unload with right hands and rams McGee into the corner. Studd says he’s not afraid of snakes and Bundy says there are no asterisks in the record books, only says whether they won or lost. Okerlund sends it to the actual broadcast team as Roberts decks McGee with a right hand. Roberts goes for the snake in the bag but then delivers a stomach breaker. Roberts smiles as he rams McGee’s face into the ground twice and slithers around. Ladd asks Monsoon about Miguel Perez Sr and Monsoon says his son is wrestling now. Yeah, 10 years later he’d be one of the founding fathers of Los Borriquas. Back to live action, Roberts counters a running roll up but turns around into a dropkick. Roberts runs into a snap suplex and McGee wastes no time with a gut-wrench suplex and a pinfall attempt for 1….2..no. Jake slithers out of the ring as Monsoon and Ladd scoffs. McGee chases him back into the ring where he hiptosses Jake. A kneedrop stuns Jake and a pinfall attempt gets two. Jake begs off but McGee drags him into the center of the ring. McGee stomps Jake in the stomach then takes him down. Monsoon says Jake landed on the external occipital protuberance area as Ladd says “you lost me at the last red light.” McGee misses a knee drop and Jake hits the arm wrench/short arm clothesline combo. Jake goes for a scoop slam but Scott rolls through and goes for another running roll-up. Jake counters and then catches Scott with the D-D-T! Jake taunts the crowd as he makes the cover..1…2….3 and this ones over. Jake immediately goes for the bag where he unleashes the giant python Damien. Ladd asks why they would let Jake bring a snake out to begin with. Alfred marvels at the snake as Fink gets in the ring long enough to announce Jake the winner before skedaddling. Jake sicks Damien on McGee as Monsoon says snakes bite. Yeah, in about 5 years ask Randy Savage how it feels. After a few minutes of torture the crowd starts chanting Hogan as the announcers scoff. In terms of match quality, it was a 4 minute squash so no sense squawking about that. Mainly it was to highlight how devious Jake was to sick a live python on people. It worked tremendously.
Time of match: 4:02

Winner: Jake Roberts by pinfall
Moving right along to the next match
Match 2

Tor Kamata vs Pat Patterson

Commentator: Gorilla Monsoon

The Showdown at Shea on August 9, 1980 was known for the Bruno/Zybysko main event with the Hogan/Andre undercard but this match was apart of it too. We all know who Pat Patterson is, but who the hell is Tor Kamata? He was known as Mr. Moto in the AWA and regional territories where he feuded with Freddie Blassie. His real name is McRonald believe it or not. He was given the name Tor Kamata based off Tomas De Torquemada of the Spanish Inquisition. Guess who gave him that name, Hawaiian promoter Sir Ed Francis, father of New England Patriots tight end Russ who competed in the WRESTLEMANIA 2 battle royal. Three years prior to this match Kamata was used as a heel to get Bob Backlund over, grooming Bob for his feud with Superstar Billy Graham. Kamata attacks Patterson at the bell who Pearl Harbors Patterson as the bell rings. Kamata is in the long black tights and white stripe while Patterson is in the standard black trunks. Monsoon calls him “the big Jap” as Kamata levels Patterson with a dropkick. Try getting away with saying that now. Kamata goes up to the top rope but misses the big splash. Patterson goes up to the top rope and drops a knee. Patterson sheds his ring jacket who stomps away on Tor in the corner. At the time Pat Patterson was 39 and Kamata was 43 years old. Just goes to show age doesn’t make a difference in wrestling sometimes. Patterson whips Kamata in the corner and backdrops him. Monsoon says he went down like yesterday’s garbage. Monsoon brings up Patterson’s heel past as well. Kamata reaches into his tights for the salt and throws it…missing Patterson completely and nailing referee Dick Kroll with it instead. IDIOT! Kroll calls for the bell and this one is over. Patterson rallies with right hands and a scoop slam. Patterson goes for the pinfall and Kroll actually counts a 1 but Kamata kicks out and bails. We go to the replay of Kroll getting nailed and we cut here. Absolutely no idea why this match was included on this tape since Kamata was never a top heel. Maybe Vince was mad at Dick Kroll one day and decided to throw this match into the tape to get back at him for something. Who knows.
Time of match: 2:05

Winner: Pat Patterson by DQ

 

Moving right along to match number three.

 

Match 3

George “The Animal” Steele vs Pedro Morales for the WWWF Heavyweight Championship

Commentator: Vince McMahon

June 30, 1973 in Madison Square Garden saw a different Animal that modern fans know and love. Before Steele became the loveable goofball in the mid 80’s he was a savage heel for many years prior. Here, he takes on the champion. Both are in their standard gear. Morales and Steele trade blows as Steele nails Pedro with a hidden foreign object the ref can’t find. Heenan, Bundy and Studd make fun of Steele in the voiceover saying he’s no longer worth anything since he turned face. Studd “He’s not one of US anymore.” Meanwhile back to 73, Steele stomps away on Morales, send him off and scoop slams him. Steele catches Morales in the throat with the object as the fans scoff. Steele tells the ref he didn’t do anything as he goes to bite the turnbuckle. Meanwhile Morales lands two left handed punches that have the Garden rocking. The camera focuses on the left hand of Steele as Morales backs him around the ring. Morales stuns Steele with an arm drag and Steele retreats to the corner. Morales lands a forearm as we get a TAPE EDIT to Steele dropping Morales with a big punch. The ref once again checks Steele but can’t find anything. George rams Morales into the steel ringpost as screams “yesssss” to the irate crowd. Steele rams him a second time as the ref tries to push Steele away. George rams Morales a third time but the 4th attempt is blocked. Morales rams Steele into the ring post as the crowd goes nuts. Morales rams him into each post and Steele blades. Morales rallies with lefts and rights as flashbulbs go off. Steele begs off and Morales bites the forehead. Morales continues to rally with left hands as the referee checks Steele’s head and calls for the bell. Steele protests but the ref raises Pedro’s arm in victory. George then pulls the foreign object out and waffles Pedro with it. George continues to pound away but Pedro backs Steele away with lefts before he steals the object. Pedro chases Steele to the back as the crowd cheers. Steele runs back out after the announcer gives the news to the crowd but we cut here. As a scientific match, it sucked monkey fuck. In terms of insanity, realism and storytelling, that was awesome. I would have loved to have been in the Garden that night and feel the buzz as Morales tried to counter the “foreign object” of the Animal. Steele was a loveable face, but he was a great, savage heel in his earlier days.
Time of match: 8:16

Winner: Pedro Morales by stoppage (still WWWF champion)

 

Continuing along to match 4
Match 4

“Big Cat” Ernie Ladd vs Andre the Giant

Commentator: Vince McMahon

April 26, 1973 in Madison Square Garden saw the battle of the giants. Ernie Ladd was a legit 6 foot 9 and had played on the 1963 American Football League Champion San Diego Chargers during his football career as a defensive lineman. Then he shattered racial barriers by becoming one of the first black top heels. Most black wrestlers up to that point were loveable fan favorites such as Bearcat Wright, Bobo Brazil and Thunderbolt Patterson…and here comes Ladd as a heel. Andre is in the black trunks and Ernie in the light blue. We’re joined in progress with Andre kicking Ladd around the ring. Andre lands a big punch as Heenan tries to say the taped thumb on Ladd’s hand was 100% legit. Andre hammers away with a big headbutt as Ladd sells it like his head was on fire. Another headbutt drops Ladd into the corner. The ref tells Andre to back off as Ladd reaches for something in his tights. He nails Andre with the big thumb twice, dropping him to the mat. By the way, this was the smaller, leaner 26 year old Andre that could still bump and move around. They’re about equal size here height wise and Andre does have a weight advantage. Andre gets his left arm caught in the top rope and Ernie goes to town with boots. Andre frees himself and Ladd continues t land big right hands including a headlocked punch. Andre then grabs Ernie’s hand and punches him with his own taped thumb. Vince calls it a taste of his own medicine. Andre whips Ernie off and backdrops him. Andre goes for the big splash but Ernie slides out of the way. Ernie bails to the outside and retreats to the back, earning a count-out win for Andre. Vince says Ernie chickened out as the crowd boos Ernie then cheers Andre. That’s one way to keep your heel heat without doing a job. Once again, catch as catch can went out the window but the crowd was still into it with Andre trying to overcome the heel tactics of Ladd. Always great to see both of them, but even better to see the mobile Andre.
Time of match; Joined in progress

Winner: Andre the Giant by count-out
Moving along to match number five
Match 5

Captain Lou Albano vs Gorilla Monsoon

Commentator: Vince McMahon

What a treat. On the same card as Pedro/Steele from earlier was Captain Lou going one on one with Monsoon himself on June 30, 1973. Lou would turn 40 a month later while Gorilla clocked in at 36. Albano was a little lighter In 1973 as Monsoon looks the same as always. Both are in standard gear as Monsoon doesn’t want to wait for the announcer or referee’s instructions. Albano begs off before he takes his ring jacket off. Big John Studd in the voiceover says we’ll be seeing big, giant jellyrolls. Bundy says they’re broken down, old windbags which is ironic as Studd was older at that time (38) than Monsoon was during this match. Albano is built at 275 pounds, Monsoon 401 pounds. The ref tries to hold Monsoon back as he checks him for objects. The ref checks Albano who caters to the irate crowd. The bell rings and immediately Albano bails. He does this a few times before Monsoon lands some forearms in the corner before Lou counters with an eye gouge. Another one follows before Lou hits a third. A fourth one has Monsoon shambles around as the ref asks Albano what he’s up to. Albano continues to work the eye gouge before landing a boot. Monsoon counters with a slap and an eye gouge of his own. Vince “Turnabout is fair play” Monsoon sends Albano off and drops him with a big chop. Two overhand chops has Albano down. Monsoon then chops Albano over the top rope. Albano runs away and Monsoon gets the count out win. The crowd cheers as the ref raises Monsoon’s hand in victory. We go to the replay where Albano flies over the top and bails. Well that was a waste of time. They were better off showing Albano’s victory over Tony Angelo from THE LIFE AND TIMES OF CAPTAIN LOU ALBANO. Instead they showed a minute of Albano eye gouging before running away. Sure he was a villain, but he could have been showcased better than that.
Time of match: 1:43

Winner: Gorilla Monsoon by count-out
No nonsense, onto match 6

Match 6

Andre the Giant and Chief Jay Strongbow vs Blackjack Lanza and Stan “The Man” Stasiak

Commentator: Vince McMahon

We’re still in 1973 as this was from November 12, 1973 in Madison Square Garden. Its also the Coliseum Video debuts of the former WWWF Champion Stasiak and one half of the blackjacks, Lanza. Stasiak’s physique wasn’t really that impressive but he was a vicious heel and would be challenging Pedro Morales less than 3 weeks after this match for the heavyweight title. Stasiak was the first to use the heart punch as a finisher. Lanza and Blackjack Mulligan terrorized the territories as big, bruising cowboy heels throughout the 70’s and early 80’s. Stasiak wants no part of Strongbow so he bails to the apron only for Jay to head scissor him into the ring. Stasiak goes to bail but Jay is snap mared in. An arm drag stuns Stasiak and we get a TAPE EDIT. Stasiak is in the long black tights with red strpe, Strongbow is in the multi-colored trunks. Andre has the blue trunks on, Lanza in standard gear. Stasiak sends Strongbow off the ropes and…rakes the eyes. Stan makes the tag to Lanza and we cut here. Well that was worthless….didn’t even get to see the ending. What the hell were they thinking? At least show the ending. What’s the point of showcasing heels if Lanza hadn’t been in the ring yet?
Time of match: Joined in progress

Winners: Unknown
I dread to think what comes next if they refused to show the ending to that one.
Match 7

Don “The Magnificent” Muraco with Captain Lou Albano vs Special Delivery Jones

Commentator: Vince McMahon and Pat Patterson

Before we get to the Jones match, we’re joined in progress for a quick highlight of Muraco heaving Pedro Morales over the top rope to the outside. Okerlund calls Muraco strange as Bundy, Studd and Heenan praise Don and insult Okerlund. Jones is in the red trunks and Muraco the standard. Jones drops Muraco with a series of arm drags that has Muraco bailing to the outside. Vince says a win over Muraco would make Jones a top contender to the title. Which title Vince? SD Jones hits the sunset flip we see in the 85 Intro before every tape for 1….2…no. SD goes back to the headlock before Muraco counters with a back breaker. Muraco misses a Vader Bomb and SD goes back to the headlock. Patterson praises Jones for his patience. Muraco powers out of the headlock but Jones headbutts Don in the back. A few right hands stun Don and Jones goes back to the headlock takeover. Patterson “Very nice” Vince “The headlock is a defensive type of a hold, not an offensive.” Good call Vince. Muraco gets the upper hand with rights but SD lands left jabs to stun Muraco and a headbutt. Muraco whips SD into the corner where SD goes for the bodypress…only Muraco counters with a powerslam. Muraco hooks the leg and the ref counts the pinfall like in the 85 Opening. Both highlights from this match were used in the montage, nice. Anyway Muraco gets the pinfall victory as Vince says “How about that?” We go back to the instant replay. Good victory by Muraco and its nice to see where the opening montage comes from sometimes.
Time of match: Joined in progress

Winner: Don Muraco by pinfall
We go straight to an episode of TNT where Muraco cuts a promo. Its the same exact one he cut in RICKY THE DRAGON STEAMBOAT except its clipped. Don says there’s no more titles to win and he runs the darkside. Vince says there’s only one way to go, down. Muraco makes fun of Ricky Steamboat saying he likes fat broads (ironic given Bonnie was a looker in her day). Muraco “Put that in your pipe and smoke it brotha”. We go right to the next match after.

Match 8

Ricky Steamboat vs Mr. Fuji

This is the same match from Ricky The Dragon Steamboat only this is just a clip. We’re at the part where Fuji has the nerve hold, Vince calls Fuji a world class wrestler. Steamboat does the fade-then-revive routine. Ricky rakes the eyes and chops Fuji down. Ricky goes upstairs and catches Fuji with the flying crossbody for 1….2..nope, Fuji kicks out. Ricky goes for the big splash but Fuji gets the knees up. Bruno says that’s the first time he’s seen someone kick out of that and Vince says Ricky didn’t hook the leg. Ricky rolls through a back suplex, rolls up Fuji and gets the 1..2….3 to win the match. Steamboat celebrates on the outside as a little girl jumps the guardrail and runs toward Ricky only for her to stop and turn around. Steamboat goes to leave but Don Muraco runs out and hits Ricky in the back with a stool. The stool breaks in half as Fuji runs out and picks up the other half. They continue to beat on Ricky before leaving. Vince calls them dastardly. Now I see why they cut the match short, to show the extracurricular activity by Muraco. What a heel.
Time of match: 4:06

Winner: Ricky Steamboat by pinfall
Next up are “Rowdy” Roddy Piper highlights. Once again we get a clipped showing of Piper’s Pit where he attacks Jimmy Snuka. Then we get the clip of him slapping Alfred Hays across the face on TNT. Then we get a clip of Piper attacking Frankie Williams on Piper’s Pit. Then we get a clip of Piper and Lou Albano exchanging unpleasantries showcased on Albano’s tape. Only this time its extended as Albano flicks Piper on the nose. Piper responds by punching Albano over the couch and calling him a fat piece of garbage. Then we get his exchange with Mr. T that set up Wrestlemania1. All of these highlights are available on his personality profile tape. Then we get some clips of Piper in the ring. Only before that, Bundy tells Okerlund to shut up for calling him a jellyroll. Ha! Studd “Piper is a great friend of ours.”The clips of Piper and Schultz beating up Andre, Piper’s match with Snuka from St. Louis, Piper and Orton against Snuka and Tonga Kid. Once again, every single clip here was from another tape. It would continue with our next match.
Match 9

“Macho Man” Randy Savage (with Miss Elizabeth) vs Tito Santana for the WWF Intercontinental Championship

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Jesse “The Body” Ventura

Wonderful, it’s the exact same match from WWF GREATEST MATCHES. We’re clipped well into the match where both Savage and Santana are down in the ring. Santana goes for the figure four, but Savage counters it by kicking him off. Randy slides to the ring apron to pull out something from his tights. He swings and misses and Tito goes for a back suplex, however Randy clocks Santana with the object on the way down. Randy crawls over on top of Tito and Davis gets down 1……2….THREE AND WE GOT A NEW CHAMPION. Thinking quickly, Savage tosses the piece of steel to the outside as Davis never saw it. Its official, the Macho Man is your new Intercontinental Champion. Savage limps to the back as Monsoon scoffs at the blatent cheating by the Macho Man, Ventura says it’s brilliant. The camera shows the cold roll of steel Savage clobbered Tito with before going to the replay. Monsoon continues to complain as we cut here. Nice to include Savage on this tape but the constant clipping is getting on my nerves now.

Time of match: Clipped for the tape

Winner: Savage by pinfall (New WWF Intercontinental Champion)
Rolling right along, its time for Terry Funk.
Match 9

Aldo Marino vs “Terrible” Terry Funk

Commentators: Vince McMahon and Bruno Sammartino

This was Funk’s WWF debut match on the June 17, 1985 edition of Championship Wrestling. The referee is the infamous Rita Marie which I’ll get to later. Okerlund says in the voiceover the reason the match is on here is because of the attendant putting Funk’s hat on his head. Bundy says the guy deserved it for ruining the hat. Studd says he could care less about Marino or Mel Phillips and Funk did a good job. Basically what happened was Mel had too much stuff in his hands so he put the hat on his head in order to carry everything. Vince laughs but Funk gets enraged and beats the crap out of Mel. Vince scoffs as Funk throws Marino out of the ring. Funk continues to beat the daylights out of Phillips. Marino tries to help out but Funk sends him out of the ring again. Funk then tosses Phillips out for good as Vince continues to complain. Sammartino “That’s Terry Funk, he’s got some reputation.” The security guards literally carry Mel out of the arena as Funk goes to work on Marino with left hands and chops in the corner. Funk drops Marino and stomps on him as Rita Marie admonishes him. Funk heaves Marino through the ropes to the outside as Funk hits the floor himself and goes to attack a fan. Marino staggers back to the ring where Funk gets whipped to the buckle. Aldo then heaves Funk to the floor. Marino hits a dropkick that sends Funk over the top to the outside. Back inside Funk delivers a back suplex to quell the momentum. Funk kicks the guy in the head and snap suplexes him. Funk goes for the spinning toe hold and applies it. Marino gives it up and Funk is the winner. Funk goes to the outside and yells at the irate crowd and we cut here. Why was Rita Marie infamous? Several years later she went on the Geraldo Rivera show and claimed Vince raped her in a limousine. Why it took her 6 years to come out with it was partially the reason nobody ever thought much of it. Did it happen? Who knows. What DID happen is Funk beat the crap out of Mel Phillips…and it sure was funny.
Time of match: 4:05

Winner: Terry Funk by submission
Can we we keep the momentum going in match ten?
Match 10

Corporal Kirchner vs The Iron Sheik (with Classy Freddie Blassie and Nikolai Volkoff)

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Alfred Hays and Ernie Ladd

After Kirchner dispatched Nikolai Volkoff at Wrestlemania 2, Sheik got the next crack at him on April 22, 1986 at Madison Square Garden. This was on the same card as Roberts vs McGee at the beginning of this tape. Sheik is in the yellow trunks with Kirchner in his standard gear. Kirchner hands his hat and American flag to Mel Phillips and does NOT attack him like Funk did earlier. The Iron Sheik DOES attack Kirchner as he gets to the ring still with his turban and robe on. Sheik whips Kirchner off and clotheslines him. Sheik chokes Kirchner with the head piece as Ladd notices the bell never rang. Sheik sheds the robe, whips Kirchner off and backdrops him as the bell finally rings. Sheik spits on Kirchner and caters to the irate crowd. Shiek gives the crowd the arm and the elbow as Hays says Sheik has no dignity. Monsoon brings up the world and tag title reigns of Sheik as Kirchner leapfrogs him and scoop slams him. Kirchner drops an elbow, drags Sheik to the corner and rams him ballsack first into the ring post, ow. Kirchner punches and headbutts the Sheik. Kirchner delivers a snap suplex then covers for 1…2…nope. A gut wrench suplex is followed by another cover for a nearfall. Kirchner misses a dropkick just as Ladd praises him. Sheik stops away then delivers a gut wrench of his own. The cover only gets a deuce and Kirchner is met with a kick to the head. Sheik goes for the abdominal stretch as Monsoon says he doesn’t have it synched in properly. Kirchner hiptosses Shiek and drops a knee….but misses the elbow drop. Sheik whips the corporal off and he goes for the sunset flip, but only gets a two count. Sheik whips Kirchner off but he gets kicked in the head this time. Sheik begs off but then sends Kirchner to the floor where Volkoff whacks Kirchner with Blassie’s cane. The ref counts to 10 and calls for the bell. Volkoff tosses Kirchner in the ring and they double team Kirchner. Sheik loads up the boot and kicks Kirchner in the chest. Volkoff goes to town with right hands until Kirchner tries to fight back. He goes outside and grabs a chair, which causes The Unamericanz to bail. Nice to see The Unamericanz and Freddie Blassie showcased.
Time of match: 6 minutes

Winner: Iron Sheik by count-out
As we head towards the end, now its time to highlight our three co-hosts. We begin with the Manager of the Year ceremony highlighted in Amazing Managers. I’ll just repost. King Kong Bundy and Big John Studd stand guard outside the ring while Bobby Heenan, Captain Lou and Hillbilly Jim stand next to the trophy with “Mean” Gene Okerlund our MC for the evening. Okerlund says the WWF has received one million votes and thanks the fans but Heenan grabs the mic. Heenan reels off the heel managers and says they all gave up their votes for Heenan to win. Added with Heenan’s votes alone, Heenan gets 519,711 votes. Bobby proclaims himself the manager of the year and grabs the trophy. Hillbilly Jim asks how many votes he has and Okerlund answers he has 316,428 votes. He asks how many Lou has and 314,166 is the total. Jim then gives up his votes to Lou which means…oh yes…CAPTAIN LOU ALBANO has won the 1985 WWF Manager of the Year award. Heenan goes beserk as Jim congratulates Captain. Heenan then nails Albano with the trophy as Okerlund hightails it out of there. Studd and Bundy hit the ring and suddenly Jim is down 2 against 1. Studd tackles Jim and Bundy splashes him again and again like we saw with Andre earlier in the tape. Heenan smashes the trophy. Bundy splashes Jim again but finally Cousin Junior and Uncle Elmer make their appearance. The Heenan family bail to the back as the hillbillies tend to Jim and Albano. Great way to maintain heel heat by Heenan’s crew.

Next is the attack on Andre the Giant by Bundy and Studd also highlighted on Wrestling’s Amazing Managers.
Match 11

Andre the Giant vs “Big” John Studd with Bobby “The Brain” Heenan

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Jesse “The Body” Ventura

We’re joined in progress as Studd and Andre are locked up. Studd works over the left arm as Andre grabs the hair and headbutts him. Another headbutt stuns Studd but John counters a backdrop by dropping the giant with a kick to the head. Studd drops two elbows as Heenan hops up on the apron with a pair of scissors. He hands Studd the scissors but Andre grabs Studd’s wrist and bites it. Andre headbutts and chops Studd then kicks Heenan who attempts to retrieve the scissors. Andre punches him out of the ring and grabs the scissors. He grabs Studd, punches him and slams him to the mat. He goes to cut Studd’s hair as Ventura scoffs….but have no fear Jesse for Bundy is here. King Kong Bundy makes his way to the ring and nails Andre just as he’s finished cutting a strand of hair off. Bundy repeatedly nails Andre with forearms as Studd gathers his bearings. Andre tries to fight back but Studd tackles him to the ground, allowing Bundy to land a big splash. Studd continues to hold the legs and Bundy splashes Andre again….and again. The ref tries to get Bundy out of there but to no avail as Heenan whips Bundy who splashes Andree for a 4th time. Cousin Junior, Rick McGraw, The Killer Bees and Lanny hit the ring to save Andre. Studd is irate at Andre cutting a bit of his hair as Bundy and Heenan try to calm him down in the entrance way. Bundy was fast becoming a monster heel and this match is what set up the big Saturday Night’s Main Event showdown between Andre and Hogan teaming against Bundy and Studd.

Time of match: Joined in progress

Winner: Andre the Giant by DQ
Next we’re shown the highlight of King Kong Bundy’s attack on Hulk Hogan which set up Wrestlemania 2. Hogan was wrestling The Magnificent Muraco when Bobby Heenan accosted Hogan leading to Hogan attacking The Brain. Bundy hit the ring and beat up Hogan, avalanching him a few times in the corner with the aid of Muraco. Bundy even threw the referee to the outside to boot. Muraco drags Hogan to the center of the ring and holds him down as Bundy delivers a big splash. Muraco turns Hogan over and Bundy hits another splash. Bundy spits on Hogan as we cut here. More dastardly tactics which was the point of the tape. Now we head to the final match on the tape….which was previously covered on ANDRE THE GIANT.
Match 12
Andre the Giant and Special Delivery Jones vs “Big” John Studd and Ken Patera (with Bobby Heenan)
Commentators: Vince McMahon and Bruno Sammartino
Can we get anymore stock footage? I swear 90% of this tape is highlights previously featured on other tapes. Anyway, December 15, 1984 was the date for this infamous moment. Studd in the voiceover praises Patera who’s “not with us at the moment but still in the family” meaning Patera was in jail at the time for real. Okerlund tells Studd he stucks as a barber and Heenan tells him to shut up. Back to the match itself, Andre teams with mid-card jobber Jones to take on the Heenan Family members. Ken’s got the bleach blonde hair and Olympic singlet as Andre wears his Wrestlemania 1 tights (which wasn’t for another 3 ½ months). Jones starts out with former IC champ Patera. Jones leaps over Patera and hooks him arm for the big drag. Andre tags in and wrenches the arm then headbutts it. Jones tags in with an axehandle to the arm before flipping him over. Ken gets his arm free and executes a backbreaker before tagging in Studd. John delivers a series of forearms then floors Jones with a back elbow smash. Studd puts the boots to him then tags in Patera who picks up where Jones left off. Patera continues to slug away but a backdrop attempt earns a kick to the face. Jones hits a headbutt that sends Ken into the face corner where Andre tags in. Patera backdrops Jones over the top to the concrete floor as Andre stalks Ken in the ring. Andre pounds on Ken in the corner then ass bumps him a few times. Patera gets a knee to the back then delivers a forearm to the back of the head. Patera holds Andre for an interfering Studd and they both pound away on the giant. Both men are able to slam Andre together then they both put the boots to him. Studd holds Andre down as Patera scales the second rope for a kneedrop. The ref calls for the bell as Patera and Studd continue to punch and kick at the fallen giant. They trade dropping elbows before Patera holds Andre down for Bobby Heenan to toss a pair of scissors to Studd. Studd proceeds to cut Andre’s trademark afro. The referee makes no attempt to stop the two heels as Patera drops Andre. Studd continues to cut the hair as the fans pelt the ring with garbage. Heenan gets in the ring and kicks Jones out of the ring. Vince says they’re raping Andre of his dignity. Try getting away with saying that now. Heenan, Andre and Patera celebrate with chunks of Andre’s hair as the heels bail to the back. We go to the replay of Patera using his legitimate Olympic strength as Studd cuts the hair. Short match but fun for historical purposes. Andre had a big afro for his entire career but would wrestle the final years with short/medium length hair.

Time of match: 3:44
Winners: Andre the Giant and SD Jones by DQ
The credits roll and this one is history. Before we go, its time for the previews. Monsoon shills BEST OF THE WWF VOLUME 8, MACHO MAN RANDY SAVAGE AND ELIZABETH and MOST EXPLOSIVE TNT SHOW. As for now, that was an average tape. They had to cram years and years of heels into a 75 minute VHS tape. Nowadays this would be a 2 disc blu-ray with loads of extras, promos and footage. Can’t fault 1986 technology for its time period. The action ranged from decent to hot so no sense squawking about that. The only complaint I have is most of the footage was from previous Coliseum Video tapes so there was barely anything new, but then again, not everyone has all the tapes so they could be seeing this for the first time. As a standalone highlights tape, its worth a look. I give it 4 out of 5 despite the cram job. The next tape after this is BRUNO SAMMARTINO: WRESTLING’S LIVING LEGEND so I’ll see everyone there.

Highlights of Wrestlemania (CS003)

I know what you’re thinking….”Hey, they already produced the inaugeral Wrestlemania, so what the hell is this?'” Good question, I myself was wondering what the purpose of a tape like this was. Believe it or not, this was the third in a short series of Coliseum Video’s that were called The Collector Series which also included THE HULKSTER HULK HOGAN and WWF’S GREATEST MATCHES. I honestly don’t know why these 3 tapes were separate from any other Coliseum Video’s that were out there at the time…but they’re very rare. Vince opens this tape and basically tells us we’re gonna be watching parts of each match from Wrestlemania. I mean it’s ok to have a tape like this for people with short attention spans, but you’re also saying “Don’t buy Wrestlemania, the best stuff is on this one anyway.” Vince runs down the card and says we’ll be seeing the main event in its entirety….what about Bundy vs SD Jones, how can we not see THAT match in its entirety?
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Jesse “The Body” Ventura
WRESTLEMANIA 1

MARCH 31, 1985

MADISON SQUARE GARDEN

NEW YORK, NY

Match 1

Junkyard Dog vs Greg “The Hammer” Vallentine with Jimmy Hart for the WWF Intercontinental Championship
Woah woah woah….this match was NOT the first match at Wrestlemania, they switched up the order for this tape. We start off at the part where JYD has an arm ringer on Greg, Vallentine then whips JYD off but Dog catches the foot then catches Greg with a right hand. Vallentine hits a knee and an elbow but misses a forearm so JYD hits his trademark headbutts on the ground before the camera pans to the Garden crowd. Monsoon says Hart is now the manager of Jim Niedhart, Bundy and Vallentine before Vallentine goes back on offense. Greg hits a forearm to the back of the neck and an elbow drop to the mid-section before going over the right leg of JYD. Vallentine goes for a half-crab and stretches the knee as the crowd begins to roar for JYD. Vallentine hits a headbutt to the midsection but JYD counters the figure four attempt and sells the injury well. Vallentine works him over in the corner before Dog rallies with right hands and headbutts as Vallentine does the flop. Jimmy Hart gets on the apron and Dog grabs him but moves out of the way causing Vallentine to hammer Jimmy to the floor. Dog backs Vallentine in the corner with forearm and a headbutt before Vallentine rake the eyes and scoops the legs with his feet on the rope for 1…2…3 and Vallentine wins it. All of a sudden Tito Santana hits the ring and tells the ref Vallentine had his foot on the rope. All of a sudden the ref calls for the match to continue making him the smartest ref in the history of wrestling up to this point, but Vallentine wants no part of it and stays out of the ring. Dog wins by count-out but the title does not change hands on a count-out so The Hammer is still the champ, the segment ends right here.

Time of match; 6;09  (the actual match was 6:53 so they cut 45 seconds of the match out plus the extracurricular activities)

Winner; Junkyard Dog by count-out  (Vallentine retains)

There is no segment, onto the next match
Match 2

The Executioner vs Tito Santana
THIS was the real first match at Wrestlemania and unlike the last one, we’re well into it at the start. Santana fires away in the corner and goes for a piledriver, but Executioner counters with a back drop. He hits a bodyslam and goes upstairs but Santana catches him with a slam off the top. Santana goes for a big splash but Executioner gets the knees up just in time, then he works over the left leg on the second rope before Tito kicks him over the top rope into the time-keeper’s table. Tito hits a power slam from the apron to the ring and hits the flying forearm out of nowhere. Tito drags him to the center of the ring and locks in the figure four as Executioner submits quickly. Actually on this tape, it doesn’t even show the ending, just Buddy…er Executioner trapped in the figure four. Least they should have shown Tito getting his hand raised so even the dumbest fans wouldn’t be confused.

Time of match; 1:32  (the actual match was 4;40)

Winner; Tito Santana by submission
There is no segment, onto the next match
Match 3

“Maniac” Matt Bourne vs Ricky Steamboat
Heh, this was actually the third match on the card of Wrestlemania and its the third match on this tape, least it’s in the right order. We’re at the part where Matt hits a snap suplex and covers for 1..2…nope, they trade blows in the ring before Steamboat gets the upper hand with karate chops. Steamboat hits a back suplex, a reverse neckbreaker and 2 knee drops for a cover of 1..2…nope. Steaboat leapfrogs over Borne and hits some sort of double punch to the face,……and the segment ends. Well that was pointless, doesn’t even show the damn ending. If I had bought this tape back in the day I would have felt gyped, ah well…onwards and upwards

Time of match: 1:34 (actual time was 4:38)

Winner: Ricky Steamboat by pinfall (though it isn’t shown for some damn reason)

There is no segment, on to the next match
Match 4

Wendi Richter (with Cyndi Lauper and David Wolfe) vs Leilani Kai (with Fabulous Moolah) for the WWF Women’s Championship

This match was much higher on the card so why is it so early on the tape? Whatever, we’re at the part where Leilani holds on to the hair then snapmares her over as Ventura speculates what its like to be on the receiving end of something like that. Kai throws Richter in the corner but a charge eats double boot then Wendi covers for a near fall. Leilani distracts the ref so Moolah chokes Wendi on the bottom rope before Cyndi runs over to save the day. Leilani whips Wendi off and hits a boot to the mid-section but Wendi rallies with a forearm and a New Delhi Devastator (and this is 1985 no less). The segment ends right there and I’m starting to get pissed….why put a tape out like this if you’re not going to show the endings? I guess Vince was smart enough to think “If I put out a Highlights tape, lets not show the endings so the fans will go out and buy the real tape!” Well that’s all fine and dandy but that kind of thinking will land this tape in the bargain bin.

Time of match: 1:28 (the real time was 6:13)

Winner: Wendi Richter by pinfall (New Women’s Champion though it wasn’t shown…again)
There is no segment, on to the next match

Match 5

The Un-Americanz (Nikolai Volkoff and Iron Sheik) with Freddie Blassie vs The US Express (Barry Windham and Mike Rotundo) with Captain Lou Albano for the WWF Tag Team Championship

The last 3 matches have gone a minute and a half so start placing bets on how long this one goes. We’re at the part where IRS…er Mike locks in an arm-bar then tags in Windham who once again comes off the top onto the elbow. Rotundo follows with the same elbow drop before Nikolai takes over and rams Rotundo’s head into Sheik’s legendary loaded boot. Sheik backdrops Rotundo and hits an elbow drop for 1…2…nope, near fall. Iron Sheik executes a gut-wrench suplex and covers for a deuce before Rotundo blocks a snap suplex and hits one of his own….and the segment ends here, just as I thought.
Time of match: 1:28 (heh, right on schedule)

Winners: Not shown….but it was The Un-Americanz

There is no segment, on to the next match
Match 6

King Kong Bundy (with Jimmy Hart) vs SD Jones
Heh, I won’t give away the ending but I will say I’ll be shocked if we don’t see this match in its entirety. SD Jones was your basic mid-card face at the time while Bundy was a rising monster heel, fresh from being a member of the Legion of Doom in the NWA. Jones runs into Bundy at the bell and Kong catches him in a bearhug then rams him into the corner. Jones crumples to the floor then gets up as Bundy hits the avalanche followed by the big splash for 1…2….3 and its over just like that. Monsoon and Ventura can’t believe it as Howard Finkel gets on the mic. “Time of the fall….9 SECONDS…your winner King Kong Bundy” Um, what? I specifically counted 23 seconds (which Monsoon ironically says is the previous record) so this was all just hooplah to get Bundy over as Hogan’s future opponent. Not only did they show the match in its entirety but it also showed the pre-match introductions and the post-match celebration. Maybe because we’ve blown through the first 6 matches they’ll show more of the final 3

Time of match: 23 seconds

Winner: King Kong Bundy by pinfall
There is no segment, on to the next match
Match 7

Andre the Giant vs Big John Studd (with Bobby Heenan) in a $15,000 Slam Match

They start off showing Studd and Andre being introduced so I assume they’re going to show the match in its entirety. Tthe rules are simple…..if Andre bodyslams Studd he wins 15 grand but if Studd slams Andre then say goodbye to the Giant. Studd attacks Andre in the corner as the bell rings before Andre rallies with chop and a big headbutt. Andre boots Studd to the outside of the ring and John regroups with Heenan, back inside Andre taunts Studd until backing him into the corner. Andre chokes Studd in the corner and Ventura asks where the ref is, but this isn’t a standard wrestling match so there are no DQ’s to speak of. Andre hits a knee to the head and big hamhock to the head before executing avalanches in the corner. Studd goes for a bodyslam but Andre blocks it then chops away at Studd before hitting a bearhug. The fants chats for Andre to slam as Ventura says “25,000 strong chanting”…..thought the building only held about 17,000 but nevertheless it is a sell out. The bearhug spot is worked for 2 full minutes before letting go and hitting a forearm to the back as Ventura says this could be the last time we could be seeing Andre. Andre hits a headlock and hits another hamhock to the mid-section as the crowd erupts. Andre whips Studd off and catches the foot, then hits another right hand to the face. Andre blocks a back elbow smash before chopping John in the corner. Andre kicks away at Studd’s leg and I’ll let Monsoon handle this one. “Andre now going to work on the leg, LOOK AT THIS…ANDRE PICKS EM UP…HE SLAMMED HIM!!!” This one’s over and Andre wins the match as the crowd erupts again as Finkel hands Andre the bag of money. Andre begins throwing money into the crowd before Heenan sneaks up, steals the bag then runs to the back with Studd. Ventura “They don’t call him The Brain for nothin Gino!” Andre poses in the ring and his career will resume….for a few more years anyway. The segment ends here but I won’t complain, they got everything that needed to be seen here.
Time of match: 5:52

Winner: Andre the Giant

There is no segment, onto the next match
Match 8

“Mr Wonderful” Paul Orndorff and “Rowdy” Roddy Piper (with Bob Orton) vs Mr T and Hulk Hogan (with Jimmy Snuka)
Wait a minute, they’re showing the main event in its entirety meaning they purposely cut out Brutus Beefcake vs David Sammartino….heh, shows how much they thought of that fiasco. Hogan and Orndorff start and its well documented these 2 have not liked each other for a long time because of their childhood in Tampa where their high schools were football rivals or something to that extent. Orndorff teases going at it before tagging Piper in. Mr T hops up and down saying let me have him so Hogan tags him in. Piper made it clear on his DVD compilation he never liked Mr. T so this feud was more personal than it was business. Piper hated Mr T, Orndorff and Hogan hated each other so this maybe an out and out shoot by the end. Piper and T staredown nose to nose before they exchange slaps to the face before hitting a go-behind takedown. T tries to sit-out/turn in but Piper maintains the ride. Mr T finally switches out of it as Orndorff fires up Piper in their corner. Mr T puts Piper into a fireman’s carry then drops him like yesterday’s newspaper (Monsoon’s words not mine). Piper backs T into his corner where Orndorff gets in then a melee ensues when all 4 men brawl into the corner. Muhammad Ali and Bob Orton get in the ring as Snuka goes upstairs. Ali throws a punch that sends Piper out of the ring then takes a swing at Orton who retreats to the ground. The heels regroup outside as the camera shows Billy Martin laughing his ass off at the proceedings. Piper motions that they’re outta here as Monsoon scoffs and the heels actually leave the area. Patterson counts up to 8 before Hogan stops him and motions for them to come back and the heels in fact do walk back to ringside. Piper and Paul get in the ring to attack Mr T and Hogan but the faces clean house. They hit a double noggin knocker on the heels before Hogan clotheslines Roddy in the corner. Hulk hits a knoggin knocker on Piper and Orndorff before hitting an atomic drop on the rowdy one. Piper and Hogan trade blows before Hulk makes the tag to Mr T then they hit a double clotheslines. T hits a scoop slam on Piper and an arm-drag on an interfering Orndorff. T hits another slam on Piper and headbutts Orndorff before ramming Piper’s head into Hogan’s knee. Make no mistake about it, in terms of physical condition Mr T has the physique that is better than half the WWF roster so had he went into wrestling, he couldn’t have been any worse than anybody the AWA put out in the late 80’s. Hogan rakes the eyes and big boots Piper over the top rope to the floor. Mr Wonderful interferes and clotheslines Hogan out of the ring so Piper grabs a chair and waffles the Hulkster with it. Muhammad Ali chases Piper back in the ring but Orndorff sneaks out and throws Hogan into the ring. Piper puts the boots to Hogan as Orndorff sneaks in a cheap shot of his own. Mr T interferes so Piper and Orndorff double team the Hulkster. Piper and Orndorff execute a double atomic drop on Hogan as Muhammad Ali gets in the ring to chase Piper out. Fans may not be pleased with Ali’s constant interference but from a kayfabe standpoint he’s supposed to be the enforcer and that’s exactly what he’s doing. Patterson has to beg Ali to get out as Orndorff works over Hulk. Orndorff hits a snap suplex as Ventura says he’s the x-factor of this match being the most technically gifted of all 4 men involved…..well 6 including Snuka and Orton outside. Piper tags in and hits windup punches then a knee lift for 1…2..nope, Hogan kicks out. Piper holds Hogan as Paul tags in and hits a forearm to the back of the neck…..One of the unwritten laws of wrestling is not to hit moves on the back of the neck because you’re more prone to actual injuries, but Orndorff would ROUTINELY do this to Hogan in their matches, pissing off the Hulkster legitimately in the process. Paul covers for a near-fall before hitting a nice backbreaker before going upstairs. Orndorff goes for another forearm off the top but misses, before Hogan makes the hot tag to Mr T. T cleans house before Orndorff is able to take him down. Mr T and Orndorff go high school style as Mr T goes for a roll but Paul wizzers to make sure that doesn’t happen. Piper makes the tag then hits a front headlock on B.A. Barabus before T tags Hogan in.  Both heels interfere so Hogan hits a double noggin knocker on them then headlock punches Orndorff until Wonderful counters with a back suplex. Piper interferes but Patterson cuts him off so both Jimmy Snuka and Cowboy Bob get in the ring. Snuka hits a jumping headbutt that sends Orton over the top to the apron. Patterson is distracted by Snuka as Orndorff puts Hogan in a full nelson. Piper and Mr. T go at it as Patterson turns his attention to him as Orton goes upstairs. Orton comes off the top but Hogan moves and Ace catches Orndorff in the back of the head with the cast. Hogan covers as Snuka roughs up Orton and Patterson gets in position..1……2…..3….its overrrrrrrr!!!!  The ring becomes chaos as everyone gets in the ring before Piper knocks out Patterson, spits at Orndorff and takes off with Orton in tow. Back inside Mr T tends to Orndoff as Billy Martin announce Hogan and Mr T the winner. Orndorff springs to life as Snuka, T, Patterson and Hogan back off. The faces celebrate in the ring as Orndorff doesn’t have a clue what happened before heading to the locker-room. Hogan, Mr. T, Muhammad Ali, Pat Patterson, Snuka, Liberace and Billy Martin all pose and celebrate in the ring as the tape ends, least they showed the main event in its entirety.

Time of match: 13:21

Winners: Mr T and Hulk Hogan by pinfall

After the credits roll, the kickass 1985 trumpet theme plays as they plug the upcoming Coliseum Video releases…now THOSE are what people were buying back in 1985-86, not what we just witnessed. I really can’t badmouth this tape too much because it was only advertised as a highlights tape to begin with. Still though, cutting the matches down to bit segments and cutting an entire match really downplays the importance of the event. They may have showed 2 full matches but the show was DRASTICALLY cut to fit on a 45 minute tape. For that I can’t recommend buying it unless you’re trying to complete a collection like me. 1 star out of 5. Since this was the third and final of the short-lived Collector’s Series, just switch over to the normal Coliseum Video reviews that are up already or will be going up. Ironic how this match was the highlights of the first WrestleMania and the next tape will be WRESTLEMANIA 2

WWF Greatest Matches (CS001)

Well, well well what do we have here? In 1986, WWF put out a three part “Collector’s Series” that were brief, 45 minute tapes that I believe was footage they had lying around and wanted to make a buck out of. That could only explain the choice of matches for 2 of the 3 tapes. So the next three reviews are for the “Collector’s Series” This tape starts out without the Coliseum Video opening. That’s a bad omen. We do start out with Vince McMahon as our host for the evening. He runs down the card and the record needle scratches for mebefore the first match as a tape with the “Greatest” matches features Uncle Elmer and Brutus Beefcake in Vince’s intro…not a good sign. We also get Randy Savage’s IC title win and Iron Sheik’s famous World Title win over long time champion Bob Backlund. Unless the matches are drastically edited, it shouldn’t be that bad of a tape.

Match 1

“Mr. Wonderful” Paul Orndorff vs Hulk Hogan for the WWF Heavyweight Championship

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Jesse “The Body” Ventura
Hogan and Orndorff were rivals dating back to high school so its no surprise they’d be taking on each other in the WWF. This may not be their most famous match (Wrestlemania 1, Big Event, or the Cage match) but this is one of the earlier bouts because there’s a ramp leading to the ring. Actually this match was from April 21, 1985 shortly after Wrestlemania. We’re in the Maple Leaf Gardens in Toronto Canada as I can tell by some of the ambience in the background. We start off with Orndorff climbing the second rope as Vince is still yapping and Hogan delivering a back suplex off the second rope. Hogan is in the yellow trunks with Orndorff in the blue. Hogan sends Paul off and delivers a running clothesline knocking him flat. Paul begs off but Hogan caters to the crowd forcing Orndorff to bail to the outside. Orndorff makes his way back inside and then Hogan delivers a side headlock followed by a shoulderblock, then Orndorff bails again. Monsoon “A good little man has never beaten a good big man”….then again this was the dawn of Vince McMahon’s bodybuilder era and it would be 10 years before the “little” men such as Bret Hart, Shawn Michaels, 123 Kid, Brian Pillman among others got their due. They exchange right hands before Hogan goes to the eyes, no doubt pleasing Ventura. Hogan delivers a running clothesline into the corner then atomic drops Mr. Wonderful followed by a headbutt. Hogan covers for a deuce as Monsoon says there’s been a lot of trash talking going down between the two of them. Orndorff delivers his first offensive move 3 minutes in, a kneelift followed by his trademark forearms to the back of the head/neck area (which Hogan says have caused permanent damage, ouch). Orndorff now drops knees to the back of the head before heaving Hogan through the ropes to the outside. Outside, Paul sends Hogan into the steel guardrail before putting the boots to him. Orndorff climbs back inside and caters to the crowd before climbing out and putting the boots to Hogan again. Hogan rolls in so Paul continues to use heel tactics to weaken the champion. Orndorff executes a snap suplex then drops a knee to the throat, the cover gets 1….2…and he got him…no he didn’t. Damn, that was annoying just to type and I had to listen to Vince say it again and again for years. Orndorff continues to stomp away before Hogan begins to rally by ramming Paul’s head into the top turnbuckle a bunch of times. Orndorff staggers and Hogan catches him with a running elbow to the head. Hogan scoop slams Paul and goes for a running elbow drop, but Orndorff rolls out of the way in time. Paul stomps away then goes upstairs, he hits a flying bodypress that Hogan rolls through and the sloppy cover gets 1…2….3 to win the match. Ventura says Orndorff’s shoulders weren’t down but the replay shows they were. Win number 1,203 in a row for Hogan out of about….100,000 to go until 1988 or so. Wasn’t that bad of a match but certainly nothing on the level of their eventual cage match. This was definitely not one of the “greatest matches” they had.
Time of match: 7:25

Winner: Hulk Hogan by pinfall

There is no segment, onto the next match.

Match 2

“Macho Man” Randy Savage (with Miss Elizabeth) vs Tito Santana for the WWF Intercontinental Championship

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Jesse “The Body” Ventura

This match would solidify Savage as a main event player so let’s go back to February 8, 1986 in the Boston Garden (sweeeeet). Macho Man has on the yellow trunks with Tito in the red. Savage jumps in the ring then locks up with Tito, they go back and forth shoving each other as Monsoon hypes the contest. They exchange go-behind’s before Savage hightails it to the ropes and bails to the outside. Back inside Randy headlocks Tito but Santana scissors out of it as Monsoon tells how Macho Man ripped up a bouquet of flowers someone handed to Elizabeth. Ventura “Can you imagine the gall of someone trying to hand her flowers?” They circle the ring as I notice the marquee saying the main event is Hillbilly Jim vs Big John Studd…..yeah, this match is much better. Camera cuts to the lovely Elizabeth as Savage sticks a thumb to the eye, pissing off Santana who chases him out of the ring. Savage yells at a security dude before turning around into right hands from Tito. Santana goes to ram Savage into the post but Randy stops him and throws the champ back inside. Macho Man goes upstairs but jumps into a right hand to the mid section as the Garden crowd applauds. Tito goes to work with right hands and a scoop slam but can’t deliver the flying forearm because Savage bailed to the outside. Santana chases after him but falls for the “first guy back in the ring clobbers the other guy” routine. Savage goes for a boot but Santana catches it, spins him around and delivers an atomic drop. Santana covers for the first pinfall attempt but Randy quickly gets the foot on the ropes. Macho Man goes for the eyes as Danny Davis admonishes him for it, dirty cheater! Randy delivers an axehandle to the back then covers for a 2 count. Savage delivers a left arm clothesline and covers for 1…2…thr….woah, nope. Santana kicks out in time as Savage goes upstairs and once again delivers an axehandle. Another cover gets a near fall as Randy protests to Davis, then Santana begins to rally before Savage gets another thumb to the eye. Santana falls to the arena floor as Randy goes upstairs to deliver an axe handle smash onto him. Ventura says you can’t win the title on the floor and says that’s how Santana escaped against Jesse himself…heh. Santana crawls on the apron where he’s greeted with a right hand right between the eyes. Santana reverses a charge and rams Savage into the ring post, back inside he punches Savage down before putting the boots to him. He hops on the second rope and delivers an elbow smash, the cover gets 1…2…nope, foot on the rope. Tito whips Randy into the corner but a charge eats knee then Savage gets a breather on the top turnbuckle, he covers but Santana throws him ontop of Davis. Tito hits a small package out of nowhere but Davis is still groggy and by the time he makes the count, Savage kicks out at 2. Tito charges but Randy counters with a back elbow smash, then goes for a knee drop but….hits it? He lands on Santana but then rolls around clutching his knee so someone screwed up. Tito pounces and goes to work on the injured leg but Danny Davis keeps getting in the way for some reason. Santana gives the sign for the figure four and applies it as the crowd goes wild, he’s got it locked in the center of the ring. Savage quickly rolls over and makes it to the ropes to break the hold. Savage rolls to the apron but Santana is relentless and suplexes Macho Man back inside the ring. Santana misses a move so Randy slides to the ring apron to pull out something from his tights. He swings and misses and Tito goes for a back suplex, however Randy clocks Santana with the object on the way down.  Randy crawls over on top of Tito and Davis gets down 1……2….THREE AND WE GOT A NEW CHAMPION. Thinking quickly, Savage tosses the piece of steel to the outside as Davis never saw it. Its official, the Macho Man is your new Intercontinental Champion. Savage limps to the back as Monsoon scoffs at the blatent cheating by the Macho Man, Ventura says it’s brilliant. Talk about a passing of the torch, Santana would never see another singles title in 7 more years with the company while Savage still had a yearlong IC title reign along with 2 future WWF Championship runs to go. Does it belong on a tape like this, yes! 1 out of 2 so far.
Time of match: 10:32

Winner: Randy Savage by pinfall (new IC Champion)

There is no segment, onto the next match
Match 3

The Iron Sheik (with Classy Freddie Blassie) vs Bob Backlund (with Arnold Skaaland) for the WWF Heavyweight Championship

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Pat Patterson
The match that paved the way for the Rock N Wrestling connection to happen, let’s get some backstory out of the way first. Vince McMahon Jr bought the promotion from his father Vince Sr and decided to go national, something unheard of in the territorial days of wrestling. To do this however, he needed a larger than life star. His current WWF Champion Bob Backlund was one of the greatest mat-based wrestlers to ever step in the ring, but on the mic and on camera he was about as exciting as a glass of water. However, he noticed a muscular man with unparallel charisma in the AWA named Hulk Hogan and decided that if he could get this guy, the business would really take off. Once he signed Hogan, he had to get the title on him as soon as possible. The problem was Backlund refused to lose to someone without a realistic amateur background and in those days, babyface vs babyface matches were also unheard of. They needed what was known as a transition champion, someone to beat Backlund for the title and to drop it to Hogan. Vince looked at his roster for a heel with amateur abilities and found The Iron Sheik, a former Olympian for the Iranian national team and on December 26, 1983….Sheik met Backlund for the title in Madison Square Garden. To set the match up for more drama, Backlund was attacked by Sheik and Blassie the week before to drive home the point Backlund was not 100 percent going into the match. It should also be noted Backlund has his head shaved, up to this point in his career he had a full head of hair. Backlund usually wrestled in standard trunks but had on a red singlet for this one. Sheik is in the blue trunks and doesn’t wait for instructions to attack Backlund from behind as the bell rings. He strangles Bob with his turban while his robe is still on. Sheik tosses his turban away then strangles Bob with his robe as Blassie looks on with a smile. Sheik pounds away on the side of the injured neck then boots him a few times. Blassie shouts out “BALI BALI BALI!” a few times until some guy in the crowd shouts it back at him. Bali is actually an island in Indonesia and Blassie admitted in his autobiography he didn’t know what “Bali” meant but as a heel manager, he had to at least look like he knew the language of his wrestler (talk about a lost art). Sheik applies an arm-bar before Backlund arm drags out of it, however Sheik quicky pounces on him with more boots and another arm-bar. Sheik shouts “IRAN NUMBVA VUN!” as Backlund powers out of it and snap mares him over. Backlund favors his left shoulder as Sheik once again bars the arm up, Blassie yells out “SHEIK” and he looks over and smiles at his manager. Patterson shills Iron Sheik and says how determined he is to win the title as Backlund starts jiggling Sheik’s pectoral area (wtf???). Eventually Backlund gets to his feet and sends Sheik off the ropes but runs into a shoulderblock. Blassie yells “COME ON, COME ON!” as Sheik runs into a hiptoss by the champ. Backlund slumps to his knees as Monsoon notes how much pain Bob is despite the fact he hiptossed Sheik with his right arm. Sheik quickly recovers and puts more boots to the back then goes back to the arm-bar. Blassie yells to stomp and “kick em” and Sheik acknowledges him but remains with the arm bar. Sheik then shoots a reversen half and makes a cover but Backlund bridges out of it at 1. Patterson makes note of Sheik’s olympic medal past as Backlund powers out of the hold and delivers a forearm to the gut. Backlund delivers another forearm but then just sits there on his knees to Sheik applies a surfboard. We get a TAPE EDIT….and we skip about 30 seconds to a minute and when we return, Patterson says it helps to have a manager at ringside. Backlund tries to power out of the surfboard but Sheik takes command for another 15 seconds. Bob eventually tosses Sheik and goes for a Nautilus cover but Sheik rolls over and delivers a side headlock, which Backlund scissors out of. Sheik rolls to his knees and bridges so Backlund tries a backslide but his shoulder gives out allowing Sheik to put the boots to him. Sheik misses an elbow drop as Arnold at ring side looks concerned. Sheik goes for a snap suplex but Backlund rolls out of it and goes for his finisher, the rolling prawn hold but again his shoulder gives out at 2. Blassie shouts at Sheik to “kick em” but Sheik instead stands over Backlund giving the sign for the camel clutch. Blassie continues to shout “KICK EM!” but Backlund gets to his knees allowing Sheik to put him in his finisher. Monsoon and Patterson raise their voices to signify how deadly the camel clutch was at the time however Backlund refuses to give up. After 15 seconds Arnold Skaaland stands up and throws in the towel despite the fact Backlund never gave up (these turn of events actually would turn into an angle 11 years later but we’ll get to that at another time). The ref sees the towel and calls for the bell and the crowd goes LIVID. The Iron Sheik is the new WWF Champion and the 5 year reign of Backlund is over. Freddie Blassie climbs in the ring and celebrates loudly with Sheik in the ring, Fred revealed in his autobiography that he new the predetermined outcome of the match but the enthusiasm that one of his proteges had won the title was 100 percent real. Monsoon hypes up the new champ and Patterson says “I am stunned.” Most of the crowd is stunned too, everyone now thinks John Cena or Triple H holds the title too long after a few months….try 5 YEARS. Hogan had the title from 84 to 88 and even that was shorter than Backlund’s reign. With this win, Iron Sheik cements his status as a hall of fame wrestler, it opens the door for Hogan and the Rock n Wrestling connection to step in and dominate the industry and it also plants a seed for a comeback by Backlund 11 years later. Blassie puts the belt on upside down as Howard Finkel announces the new champ. Sheik’s reign would only last a month but the night was his, and no one can ever take that away. Does this belong as a “greatest” match? Absolutely! We’re 2 out of 3 so far.
Time of match: An un-official 11:50 due to the tape edit

Winner: The Iron Sheik by submission (new WWF Champion)

There is no segment, on to the final match.

Match 4

The Country Boys (Hillbilly Jim and Uncle Elmer) vs The Dream Team (Brutus Beefcake and Greg Vallentine) with Luscious Johnny V

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Alfred Hays
On a tape titled GREATEST matches…..you mean to tell me that Brutus Beefcake, Hillbilly Jim and Uncle Elmer are capable of having a great match? Fortunately Greg “The Hammer” Valentine is involved so we’ll give this the benefit of the doubt for now since he’s capable of carrying a match. This Madison Square Garden match is from September 1985 since that’s after when the Dream Team beat The US Express for the belts, meanwhile Johnny V is wearing an impeccable suit. Hillbilly and Elmer enter without music as Monsoon says the advantage goes to The Dream Team based on their cohesiveness in the ring. Hays says the most dangerous wrestler of the match is Valentine (true) and Monsoon says he reminds him of Pedro Morales (also true). Brutus is in the long blue tights, Valentine is in the black trunks. Jim is in standard gear and Elmer has the white shirt on under the overalls. Greg starts out with Jim and the big guy cartwheels to show his injured leg has healed. (Dream Team did a number on him and Cousin Junior months earlier). Valentine wastes no time and springs with a headlock which Jim turns into a telegraphed big boot (seriously Greg, he put his foot up as soon as you left to run, how did you not see it coming?) Anyway Valentine does his “Valentine Flop” as Jim goes to work with a headbutt into the corner. Jim whips Greg off the corner and delivers a sloppy looking shoulder breaker which Valentine sells anyway. Hillbilly goes for the cover but the referee is out of position resulting in a one count. Jim goes to a side headlock then tags in Elmer who delivers a sloppy looking punch to the gut. Elmer picks Greg up by the throat and heaves him halfway across the ring. Valentine begs off in the corner before climbing up to the second rope as Elmer stands there shaking a fist at him. Valentine delivers a forearm to the back of the neck and I nearly spit out my popcorn….ELMER WAS WATCHING HIM GO UP THE TURNBUCKLE, WHAT DO YOU THINK HE WAS ABOUT TO DO? Valentine tags in Beefcake for the first time all match and he delivers a running boot to the neck. Beefcake stomps away then struts around the ring, heh. Valentine tags back in and delivers a running elbow drop to the fallen Elmer. Valentine drops another elbow then makes the cover, but Elmer tosses him off at 1. Beefcake tags in and baits Hillbilly Jim to get in the ring but neither one of The Dream Team does anything to take advantage. Beefcake continues to go to work but Elmer crawls his way to the corner and makes the tag to Jim. Hillbilly cleans house of Valentine and Beefcake before catching Brutus with a bearhug. Beefcake waves for Greg to help and he delivers a knee to the back of Hillbilly Jim, breaking the hold. Jim delivers a punch to the gut then somersaults into the corner to make the tag to Elmer. Elmer one arm slams Beefcake then drops a big leg on him before making the cover..1…nope, Valentine drops an elbow to save his partner. Hillbilly intercepts Valentine and now a brawl erupts, forcing Johnny V to make his way onto the apron. Jim headbutts him as Elmer does an avalanche to Beefcake in the corner. Elmer does a bearhug of his own in the middle of the ring on Beefcake but doesn’t see Valentine going upstairs. Greg comes off the top with a forearm that knocks Brutus on top of Elmer, and the ref turns around to see it..1…..2….3 and this one is over. Jim had more than enough time to make the save but didn’t turn around, which is why The Country Boys never did shit in their tenure, too stupid. First Elmer watches Valentine deliver a forearm and then Jim doesn’t have the presence of mind to turn his head 3 feet to notice his partner in trouble. Either way this mess is over and The Dream Team have retained the titles. Beefcake and Valentine bail with the belts as they are pelted with garbage then the credits roll.

Time of match: 4:59

Winners: The Dream Team by pinfall

Well, for a 4 match collector’s tape….it shockingly was pretty good. You had an awesome IC title match, the landmark title change from Backlund to Sheik, the talents of Greg Valentine and Paul Orndorff and of course the focal point of the company Hulk Hogan. The commentary was decent (shocking consider Alfred Hays was in one of the matches) and the tape was short and sweet for people that have lousy attention spans. Could have done without the edit job of Backlund’s match but other than that, nothing too much to complain about. Normally this would be a 4 star tape but this was supposedly the ‘GREATEST’ matches and I can’t forgive Uncle Elmer being in a match dubbed “the greatest” so a half star off for the obvious lie.  Another star off because that was not the best Hogan match they had either. 3 1/2 stars out of 5 and definitely watchable if you can get your hands on it. The next tape after this is THE HULKSTER HULK HOGAN so we’ll pick up there.

Best of the WWF Volume 6 (WF020)

We’ve made it to Volume 6 of the Best of series and hopefully now we can stay in the present. After RICKY THE DRAGON STEAMBOAT was somewhat of a disappointment, there’s nowhere to go but up. We will see Hogan vs Savage and that’s always entertaining. But will these be the BEST matches? Let’s find out. Cue the 1985 Opening and Gorilla Monsoon is our host today. He says we’re going to see Ricky Steamboat, Jesse Ventura, Hulk Hogan, Randy Savage, Ivan Putski, Johnny Valiant, Lanny Poffo, Terry Funk, midgets and more! Monsoon tells the fans to keep writing so they can provide the very best.
Match 1

“Leaping” Lanny Poffo vs Terry Funk

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Alfred Hays

Always nice to see Lanny in action, I always loved how not once did they ever mention he was the Macho Man’s brother in their respective runs. This match is from July 13, 1985 in Madison Square Garden. Once again, we’re going back to the past. Terry is by himself with no Hart in the red tights and Lanny in the silver. Before the match starts Funk beats up Mel Phillips on the outside before getting in the ring. They lock up and Alfred says Terry’s never been beaten in a bar room brawl. Terry gets the upper hand with right hands before he ducks under a leapfrog. Lanny goes for a move but Terry catches himself and falls into the ropes, causing the crowd to chuckle. Funk goes to work with knife edged chops and a left hand. A headbutt staggers both men before an elbow rocks Poffo. Lanny reverses an irish whip and Funk falls into the ropes again. Lanny caters to the crowd as Funk bails and shouts at the cameraman. Lanny and Funk reverse arm bars before Lanny back flips on his feet and locks in an arm wringer. Lanny gets the foot up on the shoulder for leverage. Funk then slips the leg in and falls backwards, causing Lanny to topple over the top to the floor. Funk screams at the fans and kicks at Poffo. Some guy in a corncob pipe slides Lanny back in the ring. Back inside Terry goes for an atomic drop but Lanny reverses it into one of his own. Funk staggers and bails through the ropes and to the outside. Back inside Funk slaps the chest of Lanny in the corner then rallies with left hands. A series of boxing jabs staggers Lanny as Monsoon bitches at the ref about the closed fists. A headbutt by Funk drops Lanny then goes for the figure four. Lanny powers out of it but eats axehandles to the back. Left elbows in the corner is met with a crescent kick and right hand from Lanny. Poffo wobbles Funk with a series of right hands. Lanny kicks away in the corner but two headbutts stop the momentum. Lanny bounces off the ropes and floors Lanny with a shoulderblock but falls through the ropes again. Terry goes to suplex Lanny to the floor and does, but Lanny wisely landed feet first before he fell. No way was he taking a bump on the cement floor. Funk goes outside and doggie headbutts Poffo before going back in and posing for the irate crowd. Some clown in the crowd says “I’m on tv mom!” as Funk suplexes Lanny back in the ring from the apron. Funk covers for 1….2…negative. Funk pushes the referee who gets in his face and threatens a disqualification. Funk then hits the Rude Awakening years before it was called that then covers for 1…2…no. Lanny hits a sunset flip out of nowhere for a long 2 count and the bell inadvertently rings. Lanny goes to town in the corner and whips Terry who Flair flips in the corner. Lanny kicks him over the top to the apron then snap mares him back in. A scoop slam is a set up for the second rope moonsault which was Lanny’s finisher. He hits it and covers 1…2…nope, didn’t hook the leg. Funk and Poffo trade blows before Terry gets the upper hand. Lanny reverses an irish whip before a frankensteiner stuns Funk, the cover gets 1…2..no. Funk recovers, whips Lanny off and locks in a sleeper hold right in the center of the ring. The fans cheer for Poffo who gets to his feet only for Terry to trip him up again. The ref checks Lanny and calls for the bell. He didn’t submit but the ref called the match for safety. Terry gets the branding iron and brands Lanny on the chest, luckily its not hot so all it leaves is ash. That was a great match that showcased the wily veteran slipping by the hot youngster. Did it belong on a tape like this? Anytime Terry Funk is on a WWF tape is a good thing, so yes.
Time of match: 13:06

Winner: Terry Funk by submission

Next up is the Mega Powers explodeeeeeeeee……3 ½ years early.

Match 2

“Macho Man” Randy Savage (with Miss Elizabeth) vs Hulk Hogan for the WWF Heavyweight Championship

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Alfred Hays

This match is from December 30, 1985 in Madison Square Garden. Hogan comes out to Real American for the first time in Coliseum Video history and is in the yellow tights. Savage is in the neon pink tights for this one. Hogan and Savage tie up and Hogan throws him to the ground. Savage gets a headlock in but is whipped off and shoulderblocked. Hogan chases Savage out of the ring and follows him to the floor. Savage gets Elizabeth to safety as Hogan taunts from the outside. Savage tosses a chair to the ring and Alfred says that accomplished nothing. They tie up and Savage gets a thumb to the eye and a snap mare. A knee drop stuns the champ and Hogan fakes Savage out. Savage went to jump on Hogan on the rope, but Hulk moved and Savage crashed to the mat. Hogan hits two right hands that send Savage into the corner. Hogan whips Savage into the other corner and clotheslines him down. Hogan hits an atomic drop that sends Savage through the ropes and to the outside. Hogan goes to attack Savage but Randy pulls Elizabeth in front of him. The crowd and Monsoon scoff as Hogan gets back in and demands Savage join him. Randy recovers and snap mares him. He goes upstairs but Hogan catches Randy mid-air and delivers a backbreaker. Savage bails and Hogan follows, then Randy pulls Elizabeth in front of him again. Savage tells the camera man to get lost before shouting at the irate crowd. Hogan nails Savage from behind and throws him into the ring. Savage alertly catches the champ with a knee then quickly goes upstairs and hits and axehandle. Savage covers for 1…2…nope. Savage throws Hogan to the outside then goes up to the top. An axehandle smash on the cement floor connects and Hogan is stunned. Savage slides in to break the count as Savage continues to go to work on the outside. Back inside Savage stomps away at the Hulkster then rallies with kicks and elbows. Another cover gets a 1, try hooking the leg! Hogan then Hulks Up and no-sells Savage’s punches. Hogan clotheslines Savage then stomps on his head. Hogan whips Randy off and big boots him to the outside. Hulk follows to the outside and Elizabeth stands over him. Hulk picks her up and throws her into the crowd….just kidding. He gently places her out of the way and throws Randy back inside. Randy is whipped off the ropes but gets a boot to the head. Randy goes for the flying elbow and HITS IT!!! He covers for 1……2….NOOOOOOO. Savage thinks he’s won it but the referee says no way. Savage turns around, sees Hogan coming and ducks, causing Hogan to clothesline Dick Kroll. Kroll is knocked goofy and Savage nails Hogan to the floor. Randy grabs the title belt and axehandles Hogan with it. Back inside Savage picks Kroll up and has him count Hulk out….IDIOT! You can’t win the title that way. Sure enough, the ref completes the count and Savage wins the match. Hulk is busted wide open as Elizabeth straps the belt around Savage. Fink gets in the ring and announces Savage the winner…..but….Hogan is still the champion. Savage goes berserk and knocks out Dick Kroll, then carries Elizabeth to the back…before Hogan stops him. Hogan nails Randy then picks him up in a fireman’s carry. Hogan rallies with right hands then clotheslines the Macho Man. Hulk picks his belt up and taunts Savage much to the crowd’s delight. Hogan whips Randy off but swings and misses with the belt. Savage beats a hasty to retreat as someone in the crowd holds up a Hogan Halloween mask. Monsoon says Hulk is guts personified. That was a great match with absolutely no rest holds. Did it belong on a tape like this? HELL YEAH! This was just a taste of things to come when these two would main event Wrestlemania 5.

Time of match: 10 minutes

Winner: Randy Savage by count-out (Hogan retains)

We go from two great matches to T.N.T. with Jesse Ventura with Alfred Hays hosting. Alfred opens a WWF Magazine and asks Ventura who’s better, him or Corporal Kirchner. Jesse “I was a former Navy Seal and we called those army guys ‘pukes’. Anyone who’s been in the military knows Navy Seals run circles around those pukes.” We go to Vince in the crowd with Robert Reid (no not the Houston Rockets player) who asks where Ventura got his ridiculous costumes. Ventura nonchalantly answers that its not a costume, its how he dresses. “One set of my clothes could probably buy your car.” Next up is Roger Korman (no not the famous movie director) and he wants to know if Rachel Ward is jealous of Miss Elizabeth being Jesse’s sidepiece. Jesse says there’s nothing going on between him and Elizabeth and Ward is old news. Finally an older man in a business suit named Phil Burke who’s nervous because Jesse is his favorite. He then babbles a question that’s too advanced for Jesse and Jesse says he can’t understand what he’s saying. We cut here thankfully. That looked to be heading in a funny direction and it was killed dead. No idea why this is on the tape other than to showcase Jesse. Next up is the midgets…..oh shit.

Match 3

Butch Cassidy vs The Haiti Kid

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Alfred Hays

Just what we needed, a midget match on a ‘best of’ tape. This better be good. This was on the December 30, 1985 Madison Square Garden undercard of Savage vs Hogan from earlier because you can see the exact same fans in the exact same spots. Haiti Kid is in the black trunks and Butch in ridiculous looking polka dotted long tights. At least Cassidy is well built. If he was 8 inches taller he could give Rey Mysterio Jr a run for his money. Monsoon says he’s almost as tall as referee Gil Roman. Haiti Kid chases Butch to the apron as Monsoon says midget matches were his favorite. He lists off Sky Low Low (of BLOOPERS, BLEEPS AND BODYSLAMS), Fuzzy Cupid, Lord Littlebrook (who would make an appearance 2 years later) and Little Beaver (of BIGGEST, SMALLEST, STRANGEST, STRONGEST). They tie up and Haiti Kid makes a clean break on the ropes. Butch backs Haiti in the ropes and clean breaks. Kid armdrags Cassidy twice and he complains about the tights pull. Kid gets in a headlock, Butch whips him off and eats a shoulder block. Kid bounces off the ropes, jumps over a confused Butch and scoop slams him. Butch eats two arm drags and locks in an arm bar. Monsoon says on his knees, Butch is as tall as Haiti Kid and if he grew any taller he’d be out of a job. Butch sends Kid off the ropes, leapfrogs over him but Kid reverses an arm drag. A backdrop stuns Cassidy and a standing dropkick sends Butch to his knees. Butch begs off and Haiti Kid rolls him up…and the ref doesn’t bother to count. Kid holds him for a good 10 seconds and Gil still doesn’t bother to make a count. Finally Cassidy lays flat on his back and Roman counts 1 before Kid pulls him up by the legs and midget spins him. Kid snaps the nose 3 stooges style and floors him with a right hand. Then they do the “one midget gets pinned, other one pushes him off into the ref’s arms and he drops him back on top” routine. Kid pushes the referee as everyone howls with laughter. Even Cassidy gives him a shove for good measure. Monsoon says Cassidy and Roman would make a good match. Butch takes Kid down with a go behind, Kid sits out, turns in and escapes. Monsoon asks if you can imagine being a high school wrestling coach with a 99 pound wrestler as a freshman who was still 99 as a senior? I’ve seen it happen. Cassidy wins a test of strength and goes to stomp on the hands, but Kid pulls them back in time, double stomps the feet of Cassidy who lands flat on his ass. Kid motions he’s going to kick Cassidy in the gonads but instead slingshots him across the ring. A series of chops send Cassidy into the second rope. Kid whips him off, nails him with a double chop, drops an elbow and covers for 1,….2….negative. Kid rams Cassidy into the second turnbuckle. Kid goes to town on Cassidy before nailing him with his finisher, the headbutt. He covers and gets the 1…2…NO. Cassidy slipped his arm through. Butch begs off and goes for a handshake only for Kid to bite him on the hand. Cassidy responds with an eye gouge and an elbow to the head. He rams Haiti Kid’s head into the buckle who no sells it and taunts Cassidy. A headbutt staggers Cassidy and two more stun him, A dropkick connects and Kid makes the cover 1….2..no, foot on the rope. Cassidy calls for time as Monsoon scoffs. Back inside Cassidy works over Kid in the corner, whips him to the other corner and hits a knee to the ribs. An elbow to the head is followed by a reversal of a whip by Kid and a backdrop, sending Cassidy on his back. Three chops drop Cassidy but a sloppy cover only gets two. Kid executes a swinging neckbreaker as someone in the crowd shouts to put him in a piledriver. An eye rake stops Kid’s momentum. Cassidy whips him off and executes a beautiful dropkick then an equally impressive snap suplex. Cassidy covers for 1…..2….nope. A gassed Cassidy scoop slams Kid and covers for a two count, forgot to hook the leg. Cassidy gets him up and executes a reverse shoulderbreaker. That should have done it but he has no gas left. A criss cross ends with Kid putting Cassidy in an airplane spin. Both men are staggering around but Kid recovers enough to shoulderblock Cassidy to the ground. Kid bounces off the ropes and Cassidy goes for the drop down but the alert Kid gets the feet in position and Little Louie rolls Cassidy for the 1..2…..3 and its over. WOW! I’m shocked…stunned! That was a good midget match. Yes it had some silly tactics but it wasn’t over the top silly and the guys actually put on a decent story. Does it belong on a tape like this, well this was probably the best midget match I ever saw so YES!

Time of match: 10:32

Winner: Haiti Kid by pinfall

We go back to the archives for the next match.

Match 4

Ivan Putski vs “Luscious” Johnny Valiant (with Captain Lou Albano)

Commentator: Vince McMahon

September 24, 1979 at Madison Square Garden saw a non-roided Putski take on Johnny in singles action. The Valiant’s were the reigning tag team champions and ironically it would be Putski and Tito Santana that would have the next title shot a month later. Johnny is in the long blue tights with white stars on them and Putski is in the black trunks. They announce Putski as undefeated and the guy’s thighs are enormous. This look NOTHING like the Hulkamania Putski we’d later see. Referee Terry Terranova has a problem getting Putski back to start the match and of course Lou Albano doesn’t help matters. Putski stalks Albano across the ring until Valiant attacks from behind with forearms. The bell rings and Valiant rakes the eyes. Valiant contines to work with boots to the gut who Putski no-sells. Headlock punches has the ref ticked about the open fist. More punches are no sold as Putski begins to get mad. Putski then goes wild with right hands until Valiant bails to the apron. Putski turns his back for one second and Valiant goes back to work with throat chops. Valiant pounds away as the crowd tries to rev up Putski. Ivan gets in a side headlock and two punches stun Valiant. Johnny goes down and begs off as Ivan stomps away. A Headlock has the crowd roaring and 3 headlocked punches has Johnny stunned. A big headbutt as Valiant staggering into the corner and Putski rams his own head into the buckle to psych himself up. Valiant drops to his knees and wants a handshake, Putski will have none of it. The crowd says no and on cue Putski drops Valiant with a right hand. Valiant sells it tremendously and Putski hip tosses Valiant halfway across the ring. Ivan whips Johnny off and backdrops him to the center of the ring. Valiant begs off again but gets the eye gouge in. More punches rock Ivan until he whips Johnny off the ropes. Ivan drops down twice before nailing Valiant with THE POLISH HAMMERRRRR….right in the chest. The crowd roars as Putski hits an aftershock splash for 1….2….3 its over. Madison Square Garden roars as Putski remains undefeated. Valiant retreats as we go to the replay to see Putski wallop Valiant with the Polish Hammer. Vince “Lusicous Johnny is not so luscious anymore”.  As a catch as catch can match, that was the drizziling shits. In terms of entertainment, selling and storytelling, that was a fun 4 minutes. The crowd was into it and everyone wanted to see the hammer, and they got it. Valiant was an average wrestler but he could talk, which is how he made the transition to manager. Does this match belong on a tape like this? Usually no but its for nostalgia purposes.
Time of match: 4:31

Winner: Ivan Putski by pinfall
Remember Freddie Blassie, Bobby Heenan and Lou Albano giving love advice on T.N.T.? Now its Lord Alfred Hays’ turn. I swear TNT was a god awful abomination but it got more play on these tapes than Championship Wrestling. All-Star Wrestling and almost every other program in syndication. We only have about 20 minutes of tape left so hopefully this will be quick and painless. Alfred is in his standard tux while Vince is in a dress shirt and dress pants. He asks Alfred what the difference is between English love and American love. Alfred says the gentlemen needs to hold hands while wearing gloves on the first date. He says on a second date you could go for a stroll in the park and kissing on the cheek could be too much action. Vince wants some action and says to jump to the 5^th date. Alfred says on the 5^th date you hug her but no kissy kissy. Vince “We’re getting nowhere fast here. How long would it take to become intimate!” Alfred  “Well on a normal courtship, I’d say about 5 to 6 months you’d finally get a kiss on the lips.” Vince pauses to milk the crowd’s laughter than says “Thank you for joining us. We’ll be back after this.”  Well that was funny but not in the classic sense. Alfred really did sound serious while Vince really was looking for some down and dirty action. Good news was the segment was short, but it sure as hell doesn’t belong on this kind of tape. Save it for something else. Anyway, onto the final match.
Match 5

Ricky Steamboat vs “Cowboy” Bob Orton

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Gene Okerlund
Well at least we’ll end the tape with a great match since everything Ricky did in the 80’s usually was great. Actually this is the exact same match featured on BEST OF THE WWF VOLUME 3 only without some of the edits so I’ll just re-post. Orton’s in the green trunks with Steamboat in the black, plus Orton still has the cast on. Orton comes off the ropes and narrowly avoids a karate kick. Orton bails to the outside and complains to the ref before slowly making his way back to the ring. Steamboat gives Orton crap about the cast on his arm before the tie up. Steamboat eats a shoulderblock but leapfrogs Orton and armdrags him. Steamboat wrenches the “injured” arm and does a number on it. Ricky whips Orton into the corner and chops him. Orton falls and Ricky continues to work over the left shoulder. Orton begs off but Steamboat shakes his head nooooo. Orton tries to bail but Ricky drags him back into the ring via the top rope. Steamboat goes back to the arm wringer, blocks a punch and continues to go to town on him. Steamboat wrenches the hammerlock with his FEET and falls backward twice. Ricky continues to work the arm with a kneedrop. Orton recovers and catches Ricky with a boot to the ribs. Ricky reverses a whip but Orton baseball slides right into a big chop from the future Dragon. Another armdrag takes Orton down as Okerlund says we’re witnessing something special. Ricky has the arm-bar locked in but Bob counters with a scoop slam. Ricky quickly recovers and scoop slams Orton. ANOTHER arm drag has the crowd popping. Monsoon shills the action until Orton gets to his feet. He tries a hiptoss but Ricky blocks it. Orton finally powers out of an arm-bar with a headbutt in the corner. A big forearm is followed by hiptossing Steamboat halfway across the ring. Orton executes a flying head scissors but the second attempted misses and he flails over the top rope to the floor. Orton grabs a fan’s drink and throws it at Steamboat who sells it like he had acid thrown on him. Orton goes on offense as Okerlund says the fan must be pissed without actually saying that. A big punch is followed by ramming Ricky’s head into the buckle. Orton lands another big right and follows it with a facebuster. A knee lift drops Ricky as Orton poses for the crowd and gets a decent pop actually. Orton still sells the arm wringers from earlier (a lost art today) but still catches Steamboat with a right hand. Orton applies a neck wrench and takes Steamboat to his knees with it. Orton snaps the neck then drops an elbow to the throat, but the cover only gets a two. Orton applies a rest-hold and goes to drop the cast on Ricky….but he moves out of the way in time. Orton sells the left arm and Ricky catches him with a chop. Ricky goes for the scoop slam but collapses with Orton on top 1…2..noooo, too close. Orton goes back to the standing chinlock then slams him down. Think of a rock bottom but without going underneath the arm. Orton covers for a deuce then shouts at the crowd “I came this close” and poses. Okerlund says that means nothing and Orton methodically stalks Ricky. They trade blows in the center of the ring before Ricky gets the upper hand with chops in the corner. A big right drops Orton but Bob counters with a punch to the ribs. Orton goes for a piledriver but is backdropped by Steamboat. Ricky goes up to the top rope and delivers the flying crossbody for 1…2..NOOOOOO. Orton becomes the first guy ever to kick out of Steamboat’s finisher. Ricky sends Orton off the ropes and catches him with a back elbow smash. A karate chop to the head is followed by a cover for 1….2…no. Okerlund “Come on Richard, gotta hook the leg.” Orton counters with an inverted atomic drop and throws Ricky over the top rope, but Steamboat skins the cat back in. Steamboat catches Orton with a running enziguri and Orton throws himself over the rope to the floor. Orton gets back on the apron and is met with a right hand. The ref tries to stop Steamboat from attacking which allows Orton enough time to get in an eye gouge. Orton goes to superplex Steamboat outside but Ricky counters by suplexing him back in. Ricky goes for a big splash but Orton gets his knees up. Bob adjusts his cast then goes up to the top rope. Stemboat staggers into a big left forearm off the top. The ref notices Orton used the cast and calls for the bell….WOW! A classic match ends with a cheap ending. The ref raises Ricky’s arm in victory and Orton goes berserk in protest. Orton chases Ricky with the cast but Steamboat ducks under and chops him. A series of chops sends Orton retreating to the back as Steamboat stands tall in the ring. We go to the instant replay with Okerlund and Monsoon giving their two cents Outstanding showing by both guys and Orton keeps his heat despite the loss. Did this belong on a tape like this? Considering it belonged on Volume 3, it definitely belongs on Volume 6.
Time of match: 12:37

Winner: Ricky Steamboat by DQ
The credits roll with the orchestral theme and this one’s history. Before we finish we get our standard 3 previews. BEST OF THE WWF VOLUME 7, VILLAINS OF THE SQUARED CIRCLE and BRUNO SAMMARTINO: WRESTLING’S LIVING LEGEND. That was a pretty damn good tape. The TNT segments were useless but 4 of the 5 matches were special.  The action was solid even though the tape only ran 75 minutes. At least we saw the Steamboat/Orton match in its entirety after it was clipped for the tape it was previously on. The only gripe I have is that the calendar had turned to 1986 but they were still showing matches from 1985 and prior. A lot of guys from the old guard plus even from 85 such as Jimmy Snuka were gone. The tag team era was about to take place with the Killer Bees, Hart Foundation, British Bulldogs and others while newcomers like Randy Savage and Ricky Steamboat were going to match the NWA’s highly touted cast of wrestlers. The problem was none of the tag teamers were featured here. It’s a shame they couldn’t clip a tag match in there just to showcase them. Still, the tape was pretty much a sneak preview of the future with Ricky Steamboat, Randy Savage and Hogan lighting up the cards. As for this tape, 4 stars out of 5. The Valiant match didn’t really belong and the TNT skits were useless. They could have substituted the skits with another match. I still HIGHLY recommend this tape. The next tape after this will get a little tricky, instead of the next video in the main lineage, we will look at the “Collector’s Series” beginning with WWF’S GREATEST MATCHES.

Ricky The Dragon Steamboat (WF019)

To have a personal profile tape this early in the Coliseum Video lineage, you have to be special. Discounting the god awful COUNTRY BOYS tape, the only ones who had personal profiles were the top stars ANDRE THE GIANT, Roddy Piper and Hulk Hogan (THE LIFE AND TIMES OF LOU ALBANO doesn’t count because Lou was a manager). Steamboat getting his own tape was a testament to his amazing talent as he wasn’t a champion nor was he even in the WWF as long as Hogan, Andre and Piper were. Tito Santana was a two time IC champion and he didn’t have his own tape (or ever get one). Does Steamboat deserve it though? Absolutely. He had some classic matches in the NWA and seemed ready to break out as a top star but he was held back by Dusty Rhodes. Going to WWF meant more exposure for sure, but he also had to play second fiddle to Hogan like he had to play to Rhodes. Ah well, least he got his own tape in WWF. Let’s stoke it up. Cue the 1985 Opening…oh and props to 411mania to discovering the two guys in the black and white segment of the opening were Lou Thesz and Rikidozan. Thesz needs to introduction while Rikidozan was pretty much the Thesz of Japan. He was Japan’s top star until he turned the page to his top two students, Antonio Inoki and Giant Baba….yes, All-Japan and New Japan’s founders. Gorilla Monsoon is our host tonight and he brings up how Steamboat has only been around a year and yet has had amazing matches. He says Steamboat will take on The Hammer, Don Muraco and Randy “Not so Macho Man” Savage (Monsoon’s words). We go to our first match before he’s even done with the introduction, geez, someone’s in a hurry.

Match 1

Ricky Steamboat vs Greg “The Hammer” Valentine (with Jimmy Hart) for the WWF Intercontinental Championship

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Gene Okerlund
This match is from June 21, 1985 in Madison Square Garden and its joined in progress. Steamboat is in the long black tights and Greg is in the red trunks. Steamboat stalks Greg with a karate pose until Greg tries to scoop slam him. Ricky blocks it until Greg turns it into a takedown. Ricky switches into a single leg takedown and chops Valentine in the gut. Greg staggers to his feet and Ricky goes to work with chops until Greg bails. Hart screams “No karate!” and Gene scoffs “Whataya mean no karate?” Jimmy “Hey ref, watch that kung fu karate!” Greg goes for forearms in the corner but Ricky blocks all of them and  chops Greg all the way to the ropes where he snap mares him then does the Perfect neckbreaker all in two swift motions. Damn he’s good. He locks in a chinlock until Greg gets to his feet and turns it into an arm ringer. Ricky reverses it and drops the champ with a reverse crescent kick. Monsoon and Okerlund agree they’d love to stick Jimmy’s megaphone in his ear. A quick thrust kick and back elbow smash sends Valentine to the match. Ricky stalks Greg in the corner before landing 5 kicks to the jaw. A chop to the chest is met with a Gene Okerlund “Hiyah!” The first cover of the match gets a two count. Ricky ducks under a clothesline and lands a crossbody for 1….2…nope, referee was out of position and he didn’t hook the leg. Steamboat goes to the front headlock until Greg backs him in the corner. Greg pounds away on Ricky in the corner with forearms. Ricky falls to the apron and Valentine delivers two forearms to the chest. Ricky recovers with a shoulderblock and two chops to the forehead before going upstairs. He stuns Greg with a flying chop and he tackles him to the ground. Ricky covers for 1…2..no. A scoop slam by the Dragon is wasted as Valentine gets his knees up on a splash attempt. Greg drops a knee to the ribs and we TAPE EDIT. Valentine works on the leg and goes for the figure four, only for Ricky to counter it with a cradle for 1….2..and no. Ricky does something to stun Greg but we miss it due to an unnecessary shot of the crowd. Ricky goes for a scoop but Hammer lands on top of him for 1….2…nope. Valentine catches Ricky with a forearm to the rubs and Steamboat goes tumbling through the ropes and to the outside. Hart taunts Ricky until the Dragon gathers his bearings. He looks to the crowd for support who pops. Ricky gets fired up, pounds the mat then starts no selling Greg’s offense. They trade blows until Steamboat gets the upperhand with overhand and knife edge chops. Greg goes down and Ricky has the crowd in an uproar. Two more chops drop the champ and Monsoon says he won’t get the pin because he didn’t hook the leg. Once again the cover gets a two and an elbow drops the Hammer. Ricky goes upstairs and delivers his flying crossbody for 1….2….NOOOOO, foot on the ropes. Greg recovers and back suplexes the Dragon. Greg drops two running elbows and covers for a two count, failing to hook the leg. Valentine goes for a figure four but Ricky counters by kicking him into the corner. More chops are followed by a roundhouse kick that sends Greg over the top rope to the floor. Hart picks Greg up and throws him back in but the bell rings. Stemboat chops both Greg and Jimmy through the ropes as the Fink gets in the ring. Monsoon speculates Greg was DQ’d but Fink announces Steamboat has won by count out. That was a pretty quick count by Dick Woehrle since the announcers missed it as well as the fans and Steamboat himself. We go to the replay as Monsoon says the title does not change hands on a count-out. We end the match here and that was something else. Classic booking as Steamboat beat up Valentine six ways from Sunday yet Greg retained the belt. Was it a good match? Yes it was, the story being told was the methodical Hammer could barely keep pace with the speed of the Dragon. These two would meet again years later, but for now Ricky gets the duke.
Time of match: clipped

Winner: Ricky Steamboat by count-out (Valentine retains)
Next up is a September 1985 interview on The Body Shop with Jesse Ventura. Ventura praises his own shades as he’s wearing jeans, cowboy boots and a yellow t-shirt with Manhattan written on it in the shape of NYC, clever. Ricky comes out in his black karate gi and takes a seat next to Jesse. Ventura asks how he’s doing and Ricky says pretty good. Jesse asks where the name Steamboat comes from and Ricky says he’s carrying on the family tradition. This is half true actually. When Ricky first started out he went under his real name, Richard Blood. Once he ended up in the Florida territory, Eddie Graham felt that the name sounded too heel like (compared to Dick Blood?) and decided to re-name him. Since he had Hawaian blood, Graham had him renamed Ricky Steamboat, the son of Hawaiian legend Sammy Steamboat. The funny part was nobody bothered to tell Ricky before he went to the ring the night he was renamed. The announcer referred to him as Ricky Steamboat, son of Sammy and Ricky tried to tell him that’s not his name, only for the announcer to mutter “shaddup, that’s your name now” or something like that. Ventura then says “so wait, your great great grandfather didn’t climb a coconut tree, see a steamboat and say that’s a good name for himself?” Ricky counters “No, he was standing on a volcano.” Ventura then goes into fashion mode asking what’s the deal with the outfit and says that kung fu he’s been using is illegal. Ricky “Illegal?” Ventura bitches that he’s going for the throat and Ricky says he’s checked the WWF rules and says he uses open hands, not fists like Jesse uses. Ventura “waiiiiiit a minute!” Ventura says “You don’t bend the rules?” Ricky answers no so Jesse gets bent out of shape and ends the show right then and there. Its funny because Ricky really never did bend the rules. There’s a very, very short list of guys that had a long, productive career that never worked heel. The three names I can think of are Tito Santana, Rey Mysterio Jr and Ricky Steamboat. That’s also why Ric Flair says Ricky is NOT the best wrestler of all time, because he never worked heel. It would have been interesting to see Ricky come out strutting with shades and telling the fans to stick it, but since he never did it, its hard to imagine that.
We go from an interview with Jesse to an infamous “training” segment. Once again Vince couldn’t leave well enough alone and had to give Ricky a “personality”. No he didn’t sing and dance on T.N.T. (that I know of) but he did have this “training” portion on the show. The segment is called “Becoming the dragon: the three moments of truth”. Gene Okerlund is on location with Ricky at the temple of Chang-Lao. They walk across a wooden bridge as Gene admires the scenery. Ricky says it wasn’t always serene and that it was the site of his first test: The Bridge of Serenity. We then cut to Ricky beating up ninjas in black masks…yes of course I’m serious. Now many say that the ninjas were midgets, but they’re not. They just happen to be a bit shorter than Ricky, but they’re not full fledged midgets. The object is to cross the bridge and Ricky does that after beating up the two ninjas. Some of the blows were definitely choreographed but at least they didn’t have any goofy sound effects. Back to Gene and Ricky and the Dragon says years of training saved him there. Gene and Ricky walk into the “Garden of Tranquility”. Its not really a garden as it is a stone walkway with rocks around. Ricky says this is where he went through his second test. He’s fighting ninjas again only with sticks. He dispatches them quickly as we go back to Gene and him. Gene brings us to the third test, “The Temple of Chang-Lao” where Ricky says it was the hardest one of all since he had to do it in front of all the monks. This time he’s attacked by four ninjas who he completely annihilates in short order. He bows to Chang Lao himself who presents him with a black belt for surviving the three tests. As silly as this sounds, it could have been a lot worse. It did show Steamboat beating the crap out of groups of ninjas by himself, and if he can do that, guys like Greg Valentine and Don Muraco stand no chance. Onto the next match.
Match 2

Ricky Steamboat vs Brutus Beefcake (with Luscious Johnny V) in a Street Fight

Commentators: Jack Reynolds and Billy Red Lyons

May 26, 1985 in what appears to be the Maple Leaf Gardens saw Steamboat take on Brutus in what Monsoon in the overdub calls a No-DQ, No count-out affair. So it’s a street fight without actually calling it that…great. Steamboat is in the long black tigts and Brutus is in the long zebra striped tights. Beefcake attacks Steamboat from behind before he can take his gi off. He drags Steamboat to the apron where he pounds away with forearms to the chest. Once Ricky is outside, Brutus sends Ricky to the barriet and chokes him with his own black belt. The referee isn’t counting and I wonder why until the bell rings once Brutus sends Ricky inside. NOW the match has officially begun. Brutus sends Ricky off and clotheslines him. Billy says it was a mistake for Ricky to wear that outfit to the ring and Brutus drops the Dragon with a right hand. Brutus poses for the irate crowd and drops a boot off the second rope. A scoop slam is followed by more boots to the sternum. Brutus struts for the angry crowd before Ricky begins to rally with right hands. Karate chops from Ricky sends Brutus into the corner. Brutus reverses an irish whip and drops Ricky with a clothesline. Brutus drops a big forearm and covers, the referee takes forever 1…..2…no. Beefcake pulls the top part of the gi over ricky’s head hockey style and pounds away. Ricky finally sheds the gi and Jack finally calls it such after calling it a kimono up until this point. Guess Vince was in his ear in the production truck. Beefcake rams Ricky’s head into the buckle and pounds Ricky’s chest with forearms. Ricky just beat the crap out of four ninjas armed with weapons and now he can’t beat up Brutus Beefcake? Beefcake continues to pound away only now Ricky is no-selling it. Ricky blocks a turnbuckle attempt and rams Brutus’ head into it. Ricky chops Beefcake but falls on a scoop slam attempt. Brutus covers for 1….2….noooooo. Ricky kicks out just in time. Brutus lands a series of boxing jabs followed by two forearm smashes. Steamboat then blocks a series of forearms before sliding under Brutus’ legs. A chop stuns Brutus before a big chop drops him. Ricky rings the arm then crescent kicks Brutus three times until he drops. A knife edge chop to the throat staggers Brutus who swings and misses. A knee to the ribs stuns the Dragon but Ricky ducks under a haymaker. Ricky swings and misses himself and Brutus makes him pay with a clothesline that nearly decapitates the Dragon. We get a TAPE EDIT and now Steamboat is rallying. Brutus then counters a scoop slam with a back suplex then bridges for 1…2…..nope. Ricky gets the shoulder up at 2 3/4. Brutus kicks away at Ricky and taunts him. Brutus punches, kicks and stomps the Dragon. Beefcake goes to the outside, drags Ricky out and slams him on the cement floor. Beefcake gets in the ring but distracts the ref, allowing Johnny to attack…but he doesn’t. Ricky gathers his bearings but Beefcake reaches through the ropes and brings him back in the ring. Beefcake goes for the piledriver but Ricky counters with a backdrop. Reynolds reiterates that this is No count outs and no DQ. Ricky catches a foot and chops Brutus down. A running chop drops Brutus then Ricky does the swinging neckbreaker. More chops follow and a reverse atomic drop stagger Brutus. Beefcake goes upstairs and hits the flying crossbody. The cover gets 1…2…..no. The ref’s arm doesn’t drop for three but the fans and the announcers say Ricky has won it. The lights go on as well but there was no 3. Everyone was fooled on that one. The lights go back off as Ricky rallies in the corner. Brutus reverses an irish whip but misses the charge. Ricky goes for a scoop slam but Johnny holds the foot of the Dragon. Brutus falls ontop with Johnny still holding on…1…..2….3 its over. The lights go on but all of a sudden the ref for whatever reason waves off the pinfall. Brutus raises his arms in victory but the ref snaps it downas the lights go off again. He tells Beefcake that he saw Johnny holding the foot, which is the correct call but why did he count 3 to begin with? Brutus throws Ricky over the top rope and argues with the ref. Ricky skins the cat back in, runs and rolls up Brutus for 1…2…..3 and NOW its over. The lights go on for a final time as Johnny V jumps into the ring to protest. Johnny takes a swing at the ref as he exits the ring with the victorious Steamboat. Jack says the referee’s name is Frank Gore…no, not the San Fransisco Giants running back. We go to the replay to see the real pinfall and we cut here. That was a wild match that Brutus controlled for most of it. Ricky got the pinfall but he didn’t look too impressive during it. Not only that, it was a street fight that wasn’t even all that violent. Then again, not much Ricky can do with Brutus but get beat up and make the comeback. I’m just glad its over.
Time of match: 13:27

Winner: Ricky Steamboat by pinfall
To set up the next feud, we have to go to an episode of T.N.T. where Vince in a decent looking brown suit interviews Don Muraco and Mr. Fuji. Vince brings up Steamboat and Muraco says his actions speak louder than words. Vince, Fuji and Muraco look at footage of Muraco attacking Steamboat and hanging him. Don says King Curtis Iaukea was the only Hawaiian wrestler that he admired and he has no love for Ricky. Fuji and Muraco hang Steamboat and glad-hand each other on the TNT set. Muraco says that Ricky’s too soft and he’s in his world now. Muraco says he’s as far as he going to go and doesn’t need any more titles. Kind of stupid and Vince counters “Well if you’re on top, there’s only one way to go, down!” Muraco says he won’t go down, but he’ll spit down at people under him. Muraco says he’s got some fat broads for him and he’s having a heck of a time with Mr. Fuji.  So the dastardly Muraco fired the first shot and its now time for revenge one step at a time.

Match 3

Ricky Steamboat vs Mr. Fuji

Commentators: Vince McMahon and Bruno Sammartino

After being hung by Fuji and Muraco, Ricky vowed revenge. On August 20, 1985 he got Mr. Fuji first. Fuji is in the long red tights and Ricky the long black. Ricky sprints to the ring and attacks Fuji before the bell rings. Howard Finkel almost didn’t make it out of the way. Ricky chops Fuji, sends him off and chokes him with the black belt. Ricky strangles Fuji as Vince says its payback from before. Referee Dick Woehrle doesn’t even bother to make a 5 count. Ricky chops and punches Fuji before delivering an atomic drop. Ricky lands a double chop but Fuji counters with a punch to the gonads…ow. Ricky pounds the mat in frustration as Fuji drops Ricky with his own chops. A falling headbutt has the crowd chanting “Steamboat!” Fuji locks in a nerve hold but Ricky powers out of it with a chop to the head. Fuji retaliates with a chop of his own before reapplying the hold. Ricky once again powers out of it with chops and a leapfrog but Fuji alertly gets a knee to the ribs. Going back to the nerve hold, Vince calls Fuji a world class wrestler. Steamboat does the fade-then-revive routine. Ricky rakes the eyes and chops Fuji down. Ricky goes upstairs and catches Fuji with the flying crossbody for 1….2..nope, Fuji kicks out. Ricky goes for the big splash but Fuji gets the knees up. Bruno says that’s the first time he’s seen someone kick out of that and Vince says Ricky didn’t hook the leg. Ricky rolls through a back suplex, rolls up Fuji and gets the 1..2….3 to win the match. Steamboat beats a hasty retreat as Fuji is stunned in the ring. Decent crash style match but that made Steamboat look bad. They should have booked Steamboat to leave Fuji a bloody mess in the ring and say that Muraco is next. Instead he’s booked to barely beat Mr. Fuji the MANAGER! If he can barely beat Fuji, how’s he going to beat the former IC champion Muraco? Still, decent crash style match
Time of match: 4:06

Winner: Ricky Steamboat by pinfall

BUT WAIT THERE’S MORE! After the match, Muraco runs out and attacks Steamboat with a chair. He breaks the wooden thing over him and Fuji assists in stomping him. Muraco and Fuji leave to a chorus of boos as Vince puts over Muraco as a heel, calling him every name in the book. Vince goes to the replay of Muraco breaking the chair on Steamboat’s back. Bruno says the duo should be fined and suspended and we cut here. Muraco was building tremendous heat and you know the grudge match would come eventually.
Match 4

Ricky Steamboat vs Don “The Magnificent” Muraco (with Mr. Fuji)

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Alfred Hays

October 18, 1985 in the Capital Center saw the long awaited grudge match between Steamboat and Muraco. We’re joined in progress and Muraco is in standard gear with Steamboat in the….you guessed it…long black tights.  Muraco stands on the apron as Ricky gets bent out of the shape in the ring. Ricky ducks under two clotheslines, reverses a whip and drops Muraco with a big chop. A hiptoss is followed by a scoop slam. A knee lift sends Muraco to the floor and the ref has to hold Steamboat back. Monsoon scoffs at the ref for holding him back as Muraco regroups with Fuji. A test of strength is won by Muraco who pounds away at the Dragon in the corner. Ricky reverses a whip and backdrops Don before hip tossing him again. A scoop slam has Muraco sliding through the ropes onto Monsoon and Alfred’s announce table. Monsoon says Muraco is in their lap, literally. Gorilla taunts him as Muraco gets to his feet and says “Shut up you sonovabitch.” Muraco gathers his bearings and slowly makes his way into the ring. Don purposely stalls then lands a right hand to Steamboat’s head. Ricky rams Muraco’s head into the buckle and lands a right hand. He goes for another right hand but referee Dick Woehrle grabs his arm which allows Muraco to connect with a right hand. Monsoon gives Woehrle a tongue lashing as Steamboat staggers around. “You cannot do that!” Muraco gets a thumb to the throat and delivers a back suplex. Muraco drops a knee and snap mares him over. Muraco slingshots Ricky throat first onto the bottom rope. An atomic spike staggers Ricky and Muraco scoop slams him down. Another scoop slam is followed by a clothesline but Ricky keeps getting up. A slam and another clothesline sends Ricky over the top rope to the outside. Muraco reaches through the ropes to slam ricky’s head into the apron. Muraco slides outside and drops Ricky throat first onto the barrier. Alfred says Muraco should go for the piledriver as Ricky makes it to the apron. Muraco clotheslines him down as Ricky slides into the ring. Muraco whips Steamboat off but Ricky ducks under the right hand and executes a desperation clothesline. Muraco slides to the apron then goes upstairs. Ricky catches him and slams him off the top rope. Ricky scoop slams Don and caters to the crowd. ANOTHER scoop slam has Ricky fired up and he atomic drops Muraco, who catches his head in between the ropes. Ricky chops away at Muraco as Woehrle unties him. On the floor, Ricky sends Muraco into the side of the ring. Steamboat goes upstairs and chops Muraco on the apron, who falls off. On the floor again Ricky rams his head into the apron before sliding back into the ring. Ricky suplexes him into the ring and caters to the crowd. Sensing victory, Ricky chops Muraco twice before unloading with a series of right hands. Woehrle literally throws Ricky off of Muraco and Monsoon gets pissed. Dick does it twice more and Ricky goes upstairs, executing the big chop. Fuji hops up on the apron and Ricky grabs his cane. Woehrle tries to wrestle the cane away as Fuji reaches into his hat and hands a pair of brass knuckles to Muraco. Sure enough, Ricky sends Muraco off who eats a big chop. Ricky goes for another chop but Muraco sneaks a punch to the throat, then falls ontop of Steamboat for 1….2….3. Muraco wins it! Great match…but what the hell? Did Piper, Andre or Hogan lose on their profile tapes? No? So why did Steamboat? Wow, who the hell thought that was a good idea? We cut here so even if Ricky beat him up after the bell, we won’t see it. So Ricky gets hung and Muraco gets the last word? Wow….not a great booking job for this tape at all.

Time of match: Joined in progress

Winner: Don Muraco by pinfall

We now go to a special Piper’s Pit with Ricky in the rare blue trunks, a purple warm up jacket and white boots with “Cowboy” Bob Orton standing behind Roddy Piper (in standard Pit gear). Piper sarcastically calls Ricky a new heart-throb but Piper says he’s just as hot. Piper says Ricky hasn’t had a match longer than 5 minutes and wonders why he hasn’t wrestled anyone good yet. He also calls Ricky a cheater for using martial arts just like Ventura did earlier. Piper “You may be fooling them, but you’re not fooling me for a second.”  Ricky “Well I’m sorry about that RODNEY.” Piper gets pissed and says “My name is Roderick, short for Roderick the Conquerer” Ricky “Oh, I’m sorry Conker.” Piper “That’s Conquerer! My name is Roddy Piper!” Ricky “Well what is it, Roddy, Piper or Conker?” Piper “I’ll tell ya what it is!” Orton slowly makes his way over and he and Piper sandwich Steamboat while Piper taunts him. Ricky sheds his jacket and Piper looks ready to go….and we cut. OH COME ON!!! That looked to be heading somewhere but instead we cut HERE? We had to watch the ridiculous training video in its entirety but THIS got clipped? What the hell ever…on to the next match.
Match 5

Ricky Steamboat vs Davey Boy Smith

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Jesse Ventura

If cutting Piper’s Pit wasn’t bad enough, we’re ending the tape with two matches we’ve already seen. Steamboat’s two matches from WRESTLING CLASSIC. So yes, another loss is coming up. First he goes up against Davey Boy in the first round. I’ll just re-post from the earlier Classic post. Davey is in the long red tights while Steamboat is in the long black. They shake hands to start the match then go through standard go-behinds. Davey hiplocks Steamboat to the ground. Davey Boy back drops Ricky in a pinfall position for 1….2…nope, Dragon bridges out of it and turns it into a backslide for 1…nah. Steamboat runs off the ropes into a overhead press slam. Davey covers for a near fall then applies a front headlock as Ventura says Stemboat’s giving up a lot of strength to Bulldog. Davey hits another overhead press slam for another 2 count as Monsoon scoffs at Davey for not hooking the leg. Davey goes for a suplex but Steamboat counters with a delayed suplex of his own…..Davey Boy’s trademark. Ricky goes for a splash but Bulldog gets the knees up to counter. Davey Boy executes two standing dropkicks which send Steamboat into the ropes. Bulldog goes for a third dropkick but Ricky moves out of the way and Davey Boy crotches himself on the top rope. The ref runs over, checks on Davey and calls for the bell……what the hell? Steamboat also goes and checks on Davey Boy as the ref awards the match to Dragon…..first and last time I’ve ever seen a match end this way. Cheap ending but it was a good match for a 3 minute crash style. Monsoon says Ricky didn’t want to win this way and Ventura scoffs. We go to the replay and Ventura calls what we just saw.

Time of match: 2:54

Winner: Ricky Steamboat by stoppage
We don’t bother with a segue, onto the final match of the tape.

Match 6

Ricky Steamboat vs “Macho Man” Randy Savage (with Elizabeth)

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Jesse Ventura

Once again I have no idea we’re ending the tape with another loss but what the hell. I’ll go with another re-post. Randy comes out to Pomp and Circumstance and the purple trunks. Ricky is in the long black tights. Before the match Savage sticks a finger into Ricky’s face who slaps it away then Savage runs and hides behind Elizabeth, heh what a heel. Stemboat turns his back so Savage attacks him from behind while still wearing his headband and cape. Steamboat slides under Savage and chops him through the ropes to the outside. Randy pulls Ricky out and brawls with him outside before they roll back in. Savage takes over on offense with right hands in the corner until Steamboat counters with a head scissors over the top rope to the floor.  Steamboat chops Savage on the floor then atomic drops him to the concrete. Ricky throws him inside then hits his karate chop to the chest of a running Macho Man. Savage ducks under a second chop and delivers a back suplex as Ventura makes his way back to the commentating table. Savage goes upstairs but Ricky catches him in the gut with a right hand then delivers a knee lift. Steamboat unloads with a series of fists drops then suplexes Savage halfway across the ring. Steamboat goes upstairs and hits THE FLYING CROSSBODY for 1…2…thre…no wait, Savage kicked out at 2. Ventura is openly cheering for Savage and Steamboat chops and punches Savage to the ring apron. Savage reaches into his tights for a Foreign Object and when Steamboat goes for a back suplex, Savage nails Ricky with whatever he had. Savage covers for 1….2…THREE???? You gotta be kidding, that was WAY too short for 2 guys as talented as they were. It was going good too, damn…..should have been much longer. Monsoon says that Ventura gave Savage brass knuckles in the back as Ventura scoffs.
Time of match: an unacceptable 3:26

Winner: Randy Savage by pinfall

We end the tape with the credits and the previews but I don’t care. I still don’t understand why in a 6 match tape, 2 losses were included. You didn’t see Piper, Andre or Hogan losing so why did Steamboat get the shaft? Guess Vince was once again trying to make the NWA look bad by having one of their top stars look inferior to Hogan and Andre. Still, the immense talent of Steamboat saved him from obscurity, even after Randy Savage appeared from Memphis and took the IC title away from Tito Santana. As sad as it sounds, Steamboat’s tape came out in early 1986 and he’d still have 2 years worth of good matches (including one special) still to come. Did I like the tape? For the most part yes, but again, you want to make your stars look as good as possible…YOU DON’T SHOW THEM LOSING! I mean, everyone has to lose at some point to put someone else over, and Steamboat had no problem with that…but there’s a time and a place for that. I give this tape 3 stars out of 5….1 point off for the losses and 1 point off for it only being 80 minutes long. They could have squeezed 10 more minutes of footage in there. The next tape after this is BEST OF THE WWF VOLUME 6, hopefully Steamboat will have better luck on that one.

WWF Grudge Matches (WF018)

As 1986 was in full force, BEST OF THE WWF VOLUME 5 still went back to 85 and earlier. This tape appears to be doing the same with only one match being from this year. Looking at some of the matches listed, it does make for a good tape but if you’re trying to promote new action, going back to the past becomes repetitive after 18 tapes. Still, I can’t blame Vince for when you have so much footage in the library and can only show it in 90 minute intervals (DVD’s were still nearly 15 years away), guess it takes 18-20 tapes to cover everything. This tape will showcase some of the best grudges of the past decade apparently so let’s stoke it up. Cue the 1985 opening and Gorilla Monsoon is our host today wearing a red bow-tie. Monsoon says they have received “thousands of requests” for these matches. We get a montage of the matches we’re about to see. Hulk Hogan takes on Don Muraco, star of Fuji General. Monsoon warns the fans at home that these matches will be unusually violent and bloody. Now we’re talkin’. He sends us to our first match, the champ himself.
Match 1

Don “The Magnificent” Muraco (with Mr. Fuji) vs Hulk Hogan for the WWF Heavyweight Championship

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Gene Okerlund.

May 20, 1985 in Madison Square Garden saw Hogan defend the title against Muraco in a “return bout”. Muraco has the blue trunks on while Hogan comes out in the white trunks. Coliseum Video overdubs with a Monsoon voiceover so Vince doesn’t have to pay royalties on Eye of The Tiger. Muraco attacks Hogan as he gets in the ring so he still has on the belt, headband and the t-shirt on. Muraco tears at the shirt and puts the boots to the Hulkster. The belt falls off as Muraco pounds Hogan all across the ring. Muraco chokes Hogan with Hulk’s t-shirt. Muraco catches Hogan with right hands in the corner before Hogan rallies with right hands and a headbutt of his own that sends Muraco through the ropes and to the outside. Hogan chases and clotheslines him. He delivers an atomic drop on the floor, removes the ripped shirt and chokes Muraco with it. Hogan throws Muraco back in and removes his headband. Hogan puts the boots to Muraco in the corner, whips him across and clotheslines him with the t-shirt. Hogan drops Muraco then scoop slams him. Hogan drops the big elbow and follows with right hands. There’s a sign in the crowd that says “Beach bum” in reference to Muraco. Hogan pounds on Don outside until Muraco grabs a nearby chair and nails Hulk with it. Hogan takes the chair and clocks Muraco in the back with it. Hogan rolls in and out to break the count then pounds on Muraco. Okerlund says Don is busted wide open except he’s not. Back inside Hogan executes a back suplex and throws Muraco over the top rope to the outside. Its funny how the WWF was the only promotion not to utilize the “over the top rope DQ” gimmick. Hogan rams Muraco into the steel post head first. Hogan poses on the apron as Okerlund once again says Muraco is busted open only now he really is. Hogan bites the wound and suplexes him from the apron into the ring. Hogan calls for the big leg drop as Okerlund says not to waste time. Hogan scoop slams Muraco, runs off the ropes and hits the big leg drop. Goodnight 1…2…..nope, Fuji puts the foot on the ropes. The crowd cheers and the bell rings prematurely, but this one’s not over. Fuji hands salt to Muraco and when Hogan comes over, Don hits him right between the eyes. The referee sees it and calls for the bell. Muraco doesn’t even bother dealing further damage, he gets the hell out of there and retreats to the back with Fuji. Hogan staggers around the ring as Howard Finkel announces the champ the victor. Hogan is mad and wants Muraco to come back but we cut here. This was actually a good little post-Wrestlemania feud going between Hogan and Muraco that will be settled another time. This one was pretty quick and to the point with no rest holds. Good stuff.

Time of match: 6:12

Winner: Hulk Hogan by DQ (still champion)
Moving right along to the next match.
Match 2:

Junkyard Dog vs Terry Funk (with Jimmy Hart)

Commentators: Vince McMahon and Bruno Sammartino

The most recent match on the tape from January 28, 1986 edition of Saturday Night’s Main Event sees a rarity, Terry Funk in a WWF ring. He goes to attack Howard Finkel during introductions and he’s got the red trunks on. Monsoon does a voiceover so Vince doesn’t have to pay royalties on Another One Bites The Dust. JYD has the long red tights on. Funk attacks him as he gets to the ring and they brawl outside. Funk cuts him off in the ring but eats a backdrop from JYD. A scoop slam is followed by doggie headbutts that sends Funk outside to the cement floor. Its funny Hart is the manager of Funk as there was a feud in Memphis wrestling years earlier that saw Funk team with Koko B Ware and Jerry Lawler against Hart’s crew. Funk regroups with Hart outside the ring as the crowd chants “JYD”. Some fan holds up a Beware of Dog sign as Funk eats right hands and then rams Terry’s head into the buckle 10 times. He repeats the process in the other corner as Funk staggers around. Into a third corner JYD rams him 5 times before Hart has enough and grabs the leg. No wonder Funk is crazy, he just ate 25 shots to the buckle. JYD chases Jimmy Hart outside of the ring as Vince says he’s running for his life. Back inside Dog hits a clothesline and covers for a two count. JYD headbutts Terry who ties himself up in the ropes Andre style. Jimmy goes to whack JYD in the back with the branding iron but JYD cuts him off and takes it away by sending Hart to the buckle. Terry can’t break free as the crowd cheers when JYD teases branding Terry with it. All of a sudden, Dory Funk Jr hits the ring in full suit and tie. He takes his cowboy boot off and waffles Dog in the back with it. Vince and Bruno recognize Dory and wonder how he got there, meaning this was Dory’s TV debut. The Funk brothers stomp JYD as an irate fan throws a cup of something into the ring. Jimmy hart takes his shirt and jacket off then pounds on JYD. Its funny because Jimmy still has his tie on. A host of jobbers enter the ring to save JYD as the Funks and Harts scatter. We cut to an entirely different SNME so that ends this match. It was hot and it set up the big Wrestlemania 2 tag match. Always great to see heel Terry.

Time of match: 4:30

Winner: Junkyard Dog by DQ

We cut to an interview with Mean Gene and JYD who says its his day…get it? Every dog has its day? Nevermind.
Match 2

Junkyard Dog vs Terry Funk (with Jimmy Hart)

Commentators: Vince McMahon and Jesse Ventura

Believe it or not, this match pre-dates the last one. This was on the November 1, 1985 episode of Saturday Night’s Main Event and it was a rematch after Funk branded JYD during a prior encounter. JYD in the long red tights attacks Terry on the apron before he can get his hat and chaps off. JYD brings Funk in and drops him with a right hand, then goes outside to chase Jimmy Hart. Funk gets on the second rope and JYD pulls the leg, crotching Terry on the top rope. Terry hobbles around the ring then goes outside as Jimmy Hart comes out from under the ring. Funk gets the chaps off and he’s in the black trunks in this one. Funk scoop slams JYD inside but misses the big elbow drop. JYD scoop slams Terry to the mat then scoops him up and drops him over the top to the cement floor. Jimmy runs over to pick his man up and Funk rolls on top of him and threatens to punch him out thinking its JYD. Terry walks back in and they lock up,. JYD sends him into the corner and scoop slams him. He doggie headbutts him until Funk does his Fred Sanford jab routine, flopping to the apron. The crowd chants JYD as Terry literally goes outside and jumps over the fan barrier to threaten someone. As Funk makes his way back in, Vince says a win by Funk should vault him into a future title shot against Hogan. How sweet would have that been, a former NWA Champion against the WWF Champion? Hart trips up JYD inside the ring and he bails to go after him. Ventura scoffs but JYD catches up with Jimmy only to see Terry coming up from behind. Dog backdrops Terry onto the floor as Ventura says “I hope he’s proud of himself!” Back inside JYD headbutts Terry but Funk comes back with boxing jabs and an uppercut. Terry covers for a two count then catches the Dog in a sleeper hold. The crowd chants JYD as Hart celebrates outside the ring. JYD powers out of it and ducks under a clothesline to lock in a sleeper of his own. Jimmy hops up on the apron and JYD drops Funk in the middle of the ring. JYD tries to bring in Jimmy but Hart actually lands neck first in the ring, very dangerous. Hart’s ok and he begs off before trying to slide under the ring. JYD catches him by the foot and drags him back in. Hart holds onto the rope and the ref tries to get JYD to let go, not noticing Funk waffling JYD from behind with the megaphone. Terry gets rid of the evidence and makes the cover 1…2…..3 goodnight. Hart brings the branding iron into the ring and Funk goes to brand JYD but he catches it at the last second. He waffles Funk with the iron who falls through the ropes to the outside. JYD finally gets his hands on Jimmy and decks him with a right hand, the fans go nuts. JYD takes Jimmy’s pants off and headbutts Terry. Ventura “This is ridiculous!” JYD holds Hart down and brands Jimmy on the ass, causing the little runt to squeal and squirm much to the crowd’s delight and Ventura’s disgust. Funk wins the match but JYD gets the last word. Like I said, this feud would culminate at Wrestlemania 2…but for now JYD gets one over on Funk and Hart. Modern day hipster geeks may not like the fact there were no triple flips and moonsaults, but this was a grudge match and that’s what the fans got.  Good stuff.
Time of match: 5:10

Winner: Terry Funk by pinfall
No nonsense, just the next match.
Match 4

Ivan Koloff vs Bruno Sammartino for the WWWF Heaveyweight Championship

Commentator: Gorilla Monsoon

No, not THAT match from 1971 when Koloff took the title. This was from November 17, 1975 during Bruno’s second reign. The storyline was pretty simple, Koloff beat him for the title once before and thought he could do it again. Bruno’s in the light blue tights and van is in his standard black singlet. We’re joined in progress as Koloff pounds on Bruno in the corner. Ivan sends Bruno into the corner and boots him. Gorilla on commentary says Bruno had a broken clavicle the night he lost the title to Ivan the first time. A criss-cross ends with both men colliding. Referee John Snyder counts both men but Bruno gets up and puts Ivan in a headlock. Bruno gets shot off and a shoulderblock by Ivan sends Bruno through the ropes to the outside. By the way, want to know why this match was 40 years ago yet both men are still alive today? They’re 100 percent all natural strength and conditioning. No pain pills, no steroids, no uppers, no downers, no cross country flights with 3 hours sleep and no 8 hours at the gym ruining their joints to keep their herculean physiques so they don’t lose their jobs. Bruno climbs back in and Ivan rams his head into the buckle. Bruno drops Ivan with a double kick to the eyes.Right hands stuns the big Russian and he gets dropped with a big kick in the ribs. Some felts pelt the ring with garbage as Bruno continues to attack. We TAPE EDIT and Bruno plays a game of mercy with Ivan. Monsoon says this match was 8 or 9 years ago so Monsoon’s overdub is from 1983-84. Ivan wins the game of strength with boots to the ribs. Both men trade blows and Bruno rams Ivan’s head into the buckle before whipping him into the other corner. Bruno stomps away on the Russian and stands on him as Ivan’s face tells the story. Ivan recovers to get a headlock in and he nails Bruno with a shoulderblock. Bruno counters with a back drop and knees to the back. A chinlock is applied before Bruno locks in the bearhug, Bruno’s finisher. We TAPE EDIT to Koloff still trapped in the bear hug. A thumb to the eye stops the momentum and Koloff bails to the outside. Monsoon is acting like Koloff is the champion even though he’s not. If this was 1975, Bruno is the champ. Hell, Bruno never had a rematch after Ivan took the title in 1971, Pedro Morales got the first crack and beat him. Ivan rams Bruno in the corner and chokes him with the boot. Koloff pounds on Bruno who’s busted wide open. The ref checks the wound and Koloff continues to pound away. The ref halts the bout and tells the ringside doctor to get in here and check. Yes, back then they had legitimate doctors at ringside to give the match legitimacy. The doc checks and Bruno says get the hell out the way. The doc leaves as Bruno gets fired up. He pounds away at Ivan before sending him out of the ring. We TAPE EDIT again and both men are in the center of the ring. They trade blows before the ref steps in and Ivan clocks him by accident. All of a sudden Tony Parisi and Dominic Denucci hit the ring to break up the fight as the bell rings. Monsoon himself, Blackjack Lanza, Blackjack Mulligan, Arnie Skaaland and a few others hit the ring as well to restrain the two. Bruno is declared the winner by DQ as Monsoon says Koloff keeps the title……Bruno was the champ, sorry Gorilla. After the decision is announced, the two break free and go at it again. Monsoon on commentary says he took a couple of shots in there too. Monsoon also says Arnie has blood all over his suit and he’s not happy about it. Wild brawl and the tape edits actually kept the action moving.  Old school wrestling may not look as crisp as choreographed, but at least it was presented as real. When was the last time a legit doctor was present at ringside?
Time of match: Joined in progress

Winner: Bruno Sammartino by DQ (still champion)
No BS, on to the next match.
Match 5

Greg “The Hammer” Valentine (with Lou Albano) vs Tito Santana for the WWF Intercontinental Championship

Commentators: Jack Reynolds and King Kong Mosca

Ask and you shall receive. I wondered in Best of the WWF Volume 5 if we’d ever see the Valentine/Santana title changes and here we are. September 24, 1984 broadcast of All-Star Wrestling had Santana the defending champion against the Hammer. Monsoon blows the ending of the match as Santana comes out in the red tights. Albano in the ring taunts him and Santana is distracted long enough for Valentine to sneak in a few cheap shots to Tito’s left leg. Tito hobbles around outside while Valentine in the black tights celebrates in the ring with Albano for the dastardly deed. Btw, Jack Reynolds was a veteran announcer and Mosca was an ex-football player turned wrestler. Hell, think Tony Schiavonne and Steve McMichael only less annoying. Santana hobbles inside amidst a “Tito!”chant as the bell rings. We TAPE EDIT right off the bat and now a sweaty Santana backs Valentine in the corner who begs off. Valentine catches Tito and goes to work on the left leg. Santana rallies with right hands as Mosca says Santana has heart. Valentine drops Santana and goes for the figure four but Tito kicks him. Mosca “This is the hour of power Jack! I’ve never seen anything more exciting in my life!” Ok, maybe I was wrong about the less annoying part. Anyway Valentine slugs Santana in the ropes and continues to work over the left leg. A “Tito!” chant breaks out as he catches Valentine with the Flying Forearm. He crawls over and makes the cover..1….2…3!!!! Noooooo…the bell rings but the ref waves it off. Valentine’s foot was outside the ring. Santana celebrates thinking he’s won but the ref says now. Valentine gets a knee to the back and Santana drops to the ground. Valentine covers and hooks the leg for 1…2….3 WE GOT A NEW CHAMPION!!! The fans are totally confused as Albano gets in the ring with the belt. Mosca cries foul as Albano and Valentine celebrate with the title. Santana rolls around in agony as Albano shows the belt to the referee with a big cigar in his mouth. Red Auerbach would approve of the victory cigar. The announcer gives the crowd the bad news as Valentine is the new champ. After the match, Valentine attacks Santana and applies the figure four. The ref doesn’t do anything to stop Greg and Santana screams in agony. Valentine releases the hold and leaves with the belt. The match was drastically edited for this tape’s purpose but the point was showing how Santana lost the belt which sets up the big grudge match later.

Time of match: clipped

Winner: Greg Valentine
Now we go to a vignette of Santana in a hospital bed saying he’s about to have surgery on the injured leg. All fine and dandy but he’s wearing sunglasses for some reason. Santana says he’s got torn cartilage and maybe a torn ligament and he’s about to go into surgery. A montage of Tito being prepped for surgery is shown to give some legitimacy to the angle. A doctor says he’s going to scope the knee as a telephone rings. Tito is wheeled into the operating room, prepped and put under. This was a very real procedure going on, they wouldn’t go through this much trouble if his leg was not seriously hurt. We cut to post-op where an out of it Santana says the surgery was a success. You can tell he had anesthesia because he talks softly and looks goofy. He stutters and says the cartilage tear was worse but its all taken care of. He says “you can bet your butt Greg Valentine that I will get better, and I will come after you, and payback will be hell. Arriba.” See how easy that was? Rather than come up with some stupid storyline that Greg wants Tito’s wife or he’s jealous that Tito was on TV, all he did was injure the guy and put him out of action. Fans garner sympathy for Santana while Valentine mocks him on TV any chance he gets which sets up the long awaited return bout…..which is next.

Match 6

Tito Santana vs Greg “The Hammer” Valentine (with Jimmy Hart) for the WWF Intercontinental Championship in a steel cage match

Commentator: Gorilla Monsoon
After almost a year, Santana gets his long awaited rematch for the title on July 6, 1985 in the Baltimore Civic Center and its in the obligatory cage match. Valentine has nowhere to hide and Jimmy Hart can’t save him. I already covered in a previous tape that Hart replaced Albano as Greg’s manager so no need to talk about it further. Valentine is in the black trunks and Santana in the red. Santana grabs Valentine and brings him in the ring the hard way as referee Dick Woehrle slams the cage door shut. Santana is fired up and Valentine paces around with nowhere to go. Valentine goes for a forearm but Santana rallies with right hands. Valentine recovers and goes for the door but Santana stops him. Santana rams Greg’s head into the buckle as Monsoon says the only ways to win are over the top or through the door, no pinfall or submission. Santana makes a break for it but Valentine catches him. Santana slugs away on Greg but Valentine drops him with a big forearm. Greg makes a break for it but Santana has him by the foot. Hart bellows into the megaphone but thankfully Monsoon’s overdub drowns him out. Valentine goes to ram Tito into the cage but Santana blocks it. On the other side of the ring, Santana blocks another ram job as Monsoon scoffs at Jimmy Hart. Valentine drops a hammer as Hart laughs maniacally. Greg goes to leave over the top but Santana stops him. Tito fires away at Greg’s left leg as both men climb up the cage. Monsoon says Tito has a handful of tights and we could get x-rated here. Luckily Greg’s tights stay up and Tito drops Valentine down with right hands. Valentine crotches Santana then puts the boots to him. Hammer delivers a shoulderbreaker as Hart laughs again. Greg calls for the door but a Santana lunge stops him at the last second. Santana does pull on the tights but the camera angle doesn’t show it thanfully. Santana goes for the door but Greg stops him. Greg pounds away on Santana and tries to go out only for Santana to drop him in the center of the ring. Greg drags Santana into the ring and goes for the figure four, but Tito kicks him off. Valentine unloads with right hands and sends Tito off the ropes where Santana ducks under the clothesline and waffles Valentine with the flying jalepeno as Heenan calls it. Somehow Greg gets to his feet first and he nails Santana with a back suplex. Monsoon praises Valentine’s discipline as Tito blocks Greg from leaving the cage. Greg picks up Santana and drives him backwards into the cage. Greg rams his head into the cage as the crowd chants for Santana. Valentine puts the boots to Tito then stuns him with a series of right hands. Greg tosses Santana head first into the cage then climbs the second rope. An elbow right between the eyes connects and Tito is busted wide open. Valentine goes to leave but Tito stops him just in time. Santana nails Valentine with a right hand and he flops. A big elbow drop floors Santana but a second figure four attempt is blocked. Tito kicks Valentine head first into the cage and staggers around. He climbs to the top rope and gets one foot out of the cage. Tito drops Valentine with a right hand and gets both feet over the top of the cage. Valentine goes for the door but Santana kicks it shut in Greg’s face. Santana drops to the floor and WE HAVE A NEW CHAMPION!!! Santana regains the title although Greg is not happy. Greg smashes the belt around the ring as Santana gets back in the ring. Valentine is pelted with garbage as he throws the belt into the cage and walks out disgusted. Santana picks the belt up and holds it up, its all busted up. This would lead to a new belt being made who’s design would last from 1985 to 1998. Ring announcer Mel Phillips announces Santana the new champion. Tito puts the belt on and stands tall in the ring. The only thing I have to squawk about is Santana had to wait nearly a year to get his revenge and even though he won the match, he got beat up for most of it. Instead of Greg getting his daylights beat in, Santana barely escaped with the match. Still, Tito got the belt back and wins the feud.

Time of match: 11:32

Winner: Tito Santana
Moving right to the next bout.
Match 7

Bruno Sammartino (with Arnold Skaaland) vs “Superstar” Billy Graham (with The Grand Wizard) for the WWWF Heavyweight Championship

Commentator: Gorilla Monsoon

No, this isn’t the match where Graham took the title. That was in April of 1977 in Baltimore. This was August 1, 1977 in Madison Square Garden. Bruno is in the green trunks and Graham is in the long black. Monsoon is the special guest referee and Monsoon on the overdub says he was 423 pounds here. Graham attacks Bruno before the bell rings and Monsoon pries him off.  The bell finally rings and Bruno goes to work on Graham with right hands. Bruno backdrops Billy and puts the boots to him. Billy begs off as Monsoon says Bruno looks in great shape here and he didn’t look great in Baltimore. Bruno rams Billy into the buckle then waffles him through the ropes and onto the floor. Monsoon on the overdub says he wasn’t going to count him out. Back inside Bruno puts the boots to him then stands on him. Graham begs off and Bruno continues to stomp away before landing an uppercut that drops the champion. Monsoon says Bruno was bench pressing over 500 pounds in the early 1960’s, no steroids, no suppliments. Monsoon brings up Ted Arcidi’s 705 bench press but I say Bruno’s is more impressive. Graham slides under the bottom rope, grabs Bruno’s foot and pulls him out. Graham chokes Bruno on the apron then grabs rope from under the ring. Graham slides in the ring but Monsoon notices and pounces on him. Bruno then takes the rope and strangles Graham with it and Monsoon subjectively makes Bruno cease and desist. Billy begs off but Bruno sends him into the corner. Billy reverses an irish whip but crashes knee first into the corner. Bruno goes to work on the left leg, ties it in the ropes and stomps it. Bruno caters to the crowd then continues to work over the leg, turning Graham into a half crab, We TAPE EDIT to when Graham makes the ropes. Bruno continues to work on the leg with leg twist as Monsoon motions he’s going to stop the match. Billy refuses to give it up and gets a thumb to the eye and a low blow that ref Monsoon missed but commentator Monsoon caught. Billy punches away at the ribs then goes up to the top rope. He badly misses a knee drop and Bruno shakes his head at him. Billy begs off but Bruno whips him into the corner. This time its Bruno who goes knee first into the corner. Graham boots him to the outside and he regroups with Skaaland. Bruno slides back in as Graham slides out to the other side to grab the championship belt. Monsoon tries to hold him back but he still clocks Bruno with it. Monsoon on commentary says he refused to DQ Graham because he wanted Bruno to win the title back. Bruno is now busted wide open as Graham works over the wound with fists. Bruno rallies with fists and a scoop slam. Bruno kicks him out of the ring and Graham says to heck with it. He goes to leave but Monsoon chases after, puts him in a fireman’s carry and throws him back in the ring. Bruno slugs away at the champ and rams him into the ringpost. Now Billy is busted open and Bruno sends him into another ring post, headfirst. Monsoon checks the blood on Billy’s head but Bruno goes apeshit on him. Rights, lefts, rights, whip into the ropes, BEARHUG! Monsoon goes to ring the bell and Graham punches HIM instead. Once again he refuses to DQ the champ because he wants Bruno to win clean. Monsoon wipes the blood off Graham’s head on his shirt as Bruno continues to slug away. Monsoon’s shirt is totally covered red at this point. All Bruno does is punch, punch, punch. Finally Monsoon calls for the bell as Graham falls to the mat. The ring announcer can’t get the mic to come down. The official decision was Monsoon said neither man could continue and declared it a draw. Complete bullshit as Bruno was on a roll but that was the best they could do to have Graham keep the title but not make Bruno look bad. We got to the replay where Monsoon carries Graham back to the ring and the crowd goes nuts. As a wrestling match, it totally sucked but as a pier six brawl it was awesome. Bruno was primarily a classic brawler but that’s what the fans wanted to see; a hard punching Italian laying waste to the marauding horde of infidels trying to take his title. Graham was no mat technician either but he bumped and sold everything Bruno hit him with.
Time of match: 13:05

Winner: No one, Draw
On to the final match of the tape…which looks familiar.
Match 8

“Mr Wonderful” Paul Orndorff and “Rowdy” Roddy Piper (with Bob Orton) vs Mr T and Hulk Hogan (with Jimmy Snuka)

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Jesse “The Body” Ventura

That’s right it’s the main event of WRESTLEMANIA 1. We clip the intros for this tape’s purpose and Hogan and Orndorff start.Its well documented these 2 have a history in Tampa, Florida. Orndorff teases going at it before tagging Piper in. Mr T hops up and down saying let me have him so Hogan tags him in. Piper made it clear on his DVD compilation he never liked Mr. T so this feud was more personal than it was business. Piper hated Mr T, Orndorff and Hogan hated each other so this maybe an out and out shoot by the end. Piper and T staredown nose to nose before they exchange slaps to the face before hitting a go-behind takedown. T tries to sit-out/turn in but Piper maintains the ride. Mr T finally switches out of it as Orndorff fires up Piper in their corner. Mr T puts Piper into a fireman’s carry then drops him like yesterday’s newspaper (Monsoon’s words not mine). Piper backs T into his corner where Orndorff gets in then a melee ensues when all 4 men brawl into the corner. Muhammad Ali and Bob Orton get in the ring as Snuka goes upstairs. Ali throws a punch that sends Piper out of the ring then takes a swing at Orton who retreats to the ground. The heels regroup outside as the camera shows Billy Martin laughing his ass off at the proceedings. Piper motions that they’re outta here as Monsoon scoffs and the heels actually leave the area. Patterson counts up to 8 before Hogan stops him and motions for them to come back and the heels in fact do walk back to ringside. Piper and Paul get in the ring to attack Mr T and Hogan but the faces clean house. They hit a double noggin knocker on the heels before Hogan clotheslines Roddy in the corner. Hulk hits a knoggin knocker on Piper and Orndorff before hitting an atomic drop on the rowdy one. Piper and Hogan trade blows before Hulk makes the tag to Mr T then they hit a double clotheslines. T hits a scoop slam on Piper and an arm-drag on an interfering Orndorff. T hits another slam on Piper and headbutts Orndorff before ramming Piper’s head into Hogan’s knee. Make no mistake about it, in terms of physical condition Mr T has the physique that is better than half the WWF roster so had he went into wrestling, he couldn’t have been any worse than anybody the AWA put out in the late 80’s. Hogan rakes the eyes and big boots Piper over the top rope to the floor. Mr Wonderful interferes and clotheslines Hogan out of the ring so Piper grabs a chair and waffles the Hulkster with it. Muhammad Ali chases Piper back in the ring but Orndorff sneaks out and throws Hogan into the ring. Piper puts the boots to Hogan as Orndorff sneaks in a cheap shot of his own. Mr T interferes so Piper and Orndorff double team the Hulkster. Piper and Orndorff execute a double atomic drop on Hogan as Muhammad Ali gets in the ring to chase Piper out. Fans may not be pleased with Ali’s constant interference but from a kayfabe standpoint he’s supposed to be the enforcer and that’s exactly what he’s doing. Patterson has to beg Ali to get out as Orndorff works over Hulk. Orndorff hits a snap suplex as Ventura says he’s the x-factor of this match being the most technically gifted of all 4 men involved…..well 6 including Snuka and Orton outside. Piper tags in and hits windup punches then a knee lift for 1…2..nope, Hogan kicks out. Piper holds Hogan as Paul tags in and hits a forearm to the back of the neck…..One of the unwritten laws of wrestling is not to hit moves on the back of the neck because you’re more prone to actual injuries, but Orndorff would ROUTINELY do this to Hogan in their matches, pissing off the Hulkster legitimately in the process. Paul covers for a near-fall before hitting a nice backbreaker before going upstairs. Orndorff goes for another forearm off the top but misses. Hogan makes the hot tag to Mr T. T cleans house before Orndorff is able to take him down. Mr T and Orndorff go high school style as Mr T goes for a roll but Paul wizzers to make sure that doesn’t happen. Piper makes the tag then hits a front headlock on B.A. Barabus before T tags Hogan in.  Both heels interfere so Hogan hits a double noggin knocker on them then headlock punches Orndorff until Wonderful counters with a back suplex. Piper interferes but Patterson cuts him off so both Jimmy Snuka and Cowboy Bob get in the ring. Snuka hits a jumping headbutt that sends Orton over the top to the apron. Patterson is distracted by Snuka as Orndorff puts Hogan in a full nelson. Piper and Mr. T go at it as Patterson turns his attention to him as Orton goes upstairs. Orton comes off the top but Hogan moves and Ace catches Orndorff in the back of the head with the cast. Hogan covers as Snuka roughs up Orton and Patterson gets in position..1……2…..3….its overrrrrrrr!!!!  We clip to Hogan, T and Snuka leaving and the tape ends here.  Said it a million times, great match due to the high intensity.
Time of match: 13:21

Winners: Mr T and Hulk Hogan by pinfall

The credits roll and this one’s over. Before the tape ends we get previews for the next three tapes. We got BEST OF THE WWF VOLUME 7 which highlights a British Bulldogs and Hart Foundation match. We also have VILLAINS OF THE SQUARED CIRCLE which highlights the classic heels of the company. The final tape highlighted is BRUNO SAMMARTINO: THE LIVING LEGEND which highlights Bruno of course. We’re shown a clip of Bruno and Killer Kowalski going at it. I can say right now that’s going to be a bad “wrestling” match but get ready for a bloody brawl when that comes up. As for this tape, that was certainly great grudge matches. Almost all of them were wild, bloody, full of mayhem and high intensity. It’s a shame as modern WWE prohibits blood, bad language and blows to the head to keep the kiddies happy…when old school wrestling like this had no bad language, skimpy bimbos or inappropriate storylines. Then again, WWE doesn’t claim to be wrestling, they’re “sports entertainment”. Yeah…right. Anyway mostly all the matches were good or watchable. I give it 4.5 out of 5, a half a point off because they had to clip Santana’s title loss to Valentine. Nit picking, yes, but still a valid point. I wanted to see the full match..dammit!  The next tape after this is RICKY THE DRAGON STEAMBOAT.

WWF Most Unusual Matches (WF005)

WWF MOST UNUSUAL MATCHES (WF005)

  After the first WRESTLEMANIA, Coliseum Video released MOST UNUSUAL MATCHES which was to highlight the unusual matches of the time period. Once again this is a pretty ballsy tape as we’re highlighting certain things that wouldn’t be highlighted in other promotions, but is that a good thing or a bad thing? Let’s find out. Since it was released following Wrestlemania, I’m assuming the video came out in May of 1985. Cue the Coliseum Video opening before being greeted by our host, Jesse “The Body” Ventura. Jesse is wearing a blue feathered turban and exotic red sunglasses. He says in order to present unusual matches, Coliseum Video needed an unusual wrestler and the outlandish Ventura fit the bill. He explains why these matches were chosen and why unusual matches. He makes the great point of presenting fans with greater combination of action like Texas Tornado and Lumberjack matches. We get a preview of the action we’re about to see before sending us to our first match. Ventura says there will be 9 matches shown so at least we know how many we’re in store for.

 

Match 1

Tito Santana vs Greg “The Hammer” Valentine (with Jimmy Hart) for the WWF Intercontinental Championship in a Lumberjack Match

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and “Mean” Gene Okerlund

Literally 2 weeks before Wrestlemania 1, Valentine was defending the title in Madison Square Garden against the former champ but with Lumberjack rules on March 17, 1985. Jesse explains that the concept of this match came from the old lumberjacks in the pacific northwest. They’d have their disputes and it would end when the two combatants would fight while the rest of them circled the two, no one could leave until the fight was over. Some of the heel lumberjacks are Matt Borne, “Big” John Studd, Terry Gibbs, Barry O (Bob Orton’s brother and Randy’s uncle), Charlie Fulton and King Kong Bundy. Some of the faces are Rocky Johnson, Ricky Steamboat, Jimmy Snuka and Junkyard Dog.  Valentine enters wearing purple tights and Santana in blue while Jimmy Hart is in a flamboyant suit combo. While the referee is checking Santana for foreign objects, Valentine clobbers him. Valentine unloads with forearms as Jimmy Hart taunts Gene Okerlund. Valentine drops Santana then clubs him with more forearms. Greg goes for the chinlock but Santana blocks it and gets to his feet. Santana tries to power out of it but Valentine rakes the eyes, what a heel! Greg sends Tito off but Santana catches him with a clothesline. Tito puts the boots to him in the corner then rams his head into the turnbuckle. After a Valentine Flop, Greg bails to the heel side of the ring. Borne, Studd, Orton and Fulton try to console Greg but Steamboat comes over and throws him onto the apron. Gene makes the comment “someday you may see those two go at it.” Wait till Wrestlemania 4 there Gene. Tito goes to work with forearms to the chest before Valentine drops to the floor. The heels try to protect Greg but again Steamboat comes over to toss him inside. Greg takes a swing at Steamboat then begs off. I think its funny that not only did Matt Borne let Steamboat get away with that, Junkyard Dog is literally standing next to Bundy. Guess everyone can get along after all, right? Tito catches the foot then delivers an atomic drop. Santana drops the champ with a knee lift as I notice Jimmy Hart standing next to Rocky Johnson. I heard Johnson’s son is one arrogant chef, he constantly asks people if they smell what he’s cooking.  Valentine bails to the heel side again but this time he’s thrown back in by the unlikely combo of JYD and Bundy. Greg would be wrestling JYD 14 days later at Wrestlemania. Santana attempts 10 punches in the corner but halfway through, Valentine catches him with an inverted atomic drop. Monsoon suggests that Rocky grab Jimmy Hart by the throat, heh. We get a TAPE EDIT and the crowd pops as Santana goes for the figure four, Greg squirms his way out of it and onto the floor into the arms of Jimmy Hart. Only problem is he’s on the face side of the ring and Rocky Johnson pushes Jimmy aside then with a little help from Steamboat, JYD and Snuka, tosses Greg back in. We get another TAPE EDIT (not this shit again) and now Santana has Valentine dazed with right hands. Bundy is next to Jimmy Hart now and they both cheer on Hammer. Valentine drops and bails only to be caught by Steamboat. For some reason the bell rings as Steamboat, Snuka, Dog and one of the jobbers tosses Greg back in. Valentine begs off as Tito stalks him around the ring. Tito rallies with right hands in the corner but a charge in the opposite one eats knee. Valentine falls on Tito and the ref makes the count..1….2.nope. We get a TAPE EDIT and Valentine throws Santana out to Studd and Borne’s part of the outside. Studd, Borne and JYD toss Tito back in the ring without a struggle. Valentine puts the boots to Tito then heaves him out the other side where the faces allow Tito time to rest before tossing him back on the apron, where he’s met by several Hammer forearms to the chest. Tito crawls into the ring where he’s met by a second rope forearm smash by Valentine. Greg drops a knee and the sloppy cover gets a deuce, Gorilla admonishes Greg for the cover. Greg drags Tito to the center of the ring and before he goes for the figure four, he taunts Tito by slapping him in the face. Valentine delivers a series of knee drops to the right leg of Santana then goes for the figure four. Tito blocks the first attempt then cradles him up for 1..2..nope. They trade blows in the center of the ring but a running forearm shot by Hammer floors Santana. Yet another TAPE EDIT followed by Santana rallying with right hands. They trade blows in the ring but now Santana gets the upper hand causing a Valentine Flop. Valentine goes to bail but catches him by pulling his tights down. The camera cuts to JYD shoving Barry O to keep this a family show. Santana suplexes a dazed Hammer. Tito makes the cover but only gets a deuce. Tito drops a few knees then goes for his own figure four, but Valentine blocks it and kicks him off. Valentine bails and heads for the exit but the faces stop him and heave him back inside. Santana hits a running forearm (not his finisher) that drops Hammer. Santana then goes for the figure four and hooks it in but Jimmy Hart hops up on the apron to distract the referee. Studd slides in the ring and pulls Valentine toward the ropes. The ref turns around and makes Santana break the hold. Santana goes after Studd but Valentine delivers a knee to the back. Valentine pounds away but Tito rallies then a brawl develops. Tito sends Greg off but their heads collide. Greg happens to fall on Santana and the ref counts 1…..2….3 and its over. Monsoon can’t believe it but The Hammer retains. The lumberjacks leave ringside as Fink announces Valentine the winner. Jimmy Hart and King Kong Bundy celebrate than get the heck out of dodge with the Hammer. Standard 1984 action but was this unusual? Not really, even for the time period.

Time of match: Edited, who cares?

Winner: Greg Valentine by pinfall (Still IC Champion)

We got right into the next match

Match 2

Greg “The Hammer” Valentine vs “Chief” Jay Strongbow in an Indian Strap Match

Commentator: Jesse “The Body” Ventura

On July 30, 1979 Valentine took on Strongbow at Madison Square Garden in a strap match which was unusual for that time period anyway. Valentine wastes no time and attacks Strongbow after Fink’s instructions. Valentine puts the boots to him before the strap is put on. BRILLIANT! The ref finally puts the strap on Greg and the bell gets underway. Greg clubs away in the corner then strangles Jay in the corner. Greg continues to pound away in the corner and Strongbow is busted open. Strongbow was a spry 50 at the time of the match and Greg was a month away from his 28^th birthday. A prime hammer so to speak. Greg pounds away but Jay starts no-selling. He goes into the “Hey-How-Are-Ya” hulk up so to speak. Strongbow rallies with right hands and then starts whipping Greg all over the ring. Jay rams Greg into his own knee and we get another stinkin TAPE EDIT. Valentine delivers an elbow to the head and Strongbow crumples outside. Strongbow goes to regroup but he’s strapped so Valentine just lugs him back to the ring. Valentine kicks him back out and repeats the process until Strongbow grabs Greg’s leg. Jay pulls Greg out and they trade blows on the floor. Jay rams Greg’s head into the guardrail twice then grabs a chair. Greg stops the chair but is rammed into the ring post. Valentine is busted open as they continue to brawl. Greg then chokes Strongbow on the bottom rope. The ref steps in but Chief fights out of it. They trade blows in the corner as the ref tries to separate them. Jay then kicks the ref square in the nuts as the brawl continues. Ivan Putski, Tito Santana and Dominic DeNucci hit the ring to break up the fight. The bell rings as the two are pulled apart. A fan reaches over the guardrail and grabs a chair away from Valentine so Greg throws a few forearms at the portly gentleman. Back in those days, fans would routinely rush the ring and wrestlers were given carte blanche to fight their way out. Neither would never happen now, if a fan rushes the ring he would be whisked away by security and if a wrestled belted a fan, there’s a lawsuit on Vince’s hands. Gorilla Monsoon comes out to restore order before the fans riot. Everyone but Valentine bails and the fan reaches over again, Valentine goes to attack but security and the police restrain the two. They finally get Greg out of there was the scene cuts. That was a hell of a finish, a DQ in a strap match. Was it unusual? You bet your bippy big guy.

Time of match: An edited 5 minutes (real time was 7:46)

Winner: No one (Double DQ)

We head right into the next match

Match 3

“Superfly” Jimmy Snuka and Junkyard Dog vs “Rowdy” Roddy Piper and “Cowboy” Bob Orton in a Texas Tornado Rules tag match

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Gene Okerlund

Madison Square Garden on January 21, 1985 saw this rare match. Rare for the rules, not for the participants. The rules are all four participants are in at the same time, there are no tags. This is going to be a long one for that reason only. Snuka starts unloading on Piper while Orton trades punches with JYD. JYD and Snuka gain the upper hand and whip the two heels together, only Orton backdrops Piper. Snuka headbutts Orton who crashes into Piper and they both go down. JYD gets on his knees and headbutts Piper around as Snuka snapmares Orton. Piper begs off as Snuka nails Orton with a punch that sends him through the ropes and to the outside. Piper is caught between Dog and Snuka so he bails to the other side of the ring. Snuka goes after him as Orton tries to sneak up on Dog but JYD nails him in the ribs. Snuka continues to attack Piper on the floor as Dog drops Orton with a clothesline. Piper whips Snuka into the ring post as Dog’s cover gets 1..2..and no. Piper gets in the ring, taps Dog on the shoulder and then pokes him in the eyes 3 Stooges style when Dog turns to look. Piper holds Dog and Orton knocks him down with a clothesline. Piper covers but Dog powers out at 2. Snuke re-enters the ring but Roddy cuts him off. Piper boots JYD to the outside as Orton comes over to take a swing at Snuka. Jimmy grabs Orton and Piper then rams their two heads together. Piper staggers backward and JYD kneels down behind him for the schoolyard trip but Piper goes to one knee and Snuka just tackles him over JYD. Snuka pounds the head of Piper but Roddy bails. Roddy heads for the exit but Snuka cuts him off with Orton in hot pursuit. Orton staggers back where Dog catches him and a brawl develops on the floor. Back inside Jimmy bites Piper on the mat as Orton pounds on Dog.  Orton then holds Snuka for Piper to deliver more damage and Piper cuts an onrushing JYD off with a thumb to the eye. Piper snapmares Dog and locks in a chinlock while Orton does the same to Snuka. We get a TAPE EDIT but the chinlocks are still applied. The faces then get to their feet but the heels whip them off the ropes to apply sleeperholds. Piper then kicks away at Snuka but we get another TAPE EDIT. Dog and Snuka are fading but they revive. Dog and Snuka grab each other’s hands and ram Orton/Piper’s heads together. Dog does his headbutts to Orton on the mat as Snuka rallies with right hands and a headbutt on Piper. Dog whops Orton into the corner who spirals upside down. Piper drops Dog with a kneelift, then in a moment that’s captured in the Coliseum Video opening montage; Piper and Orton combine to scoop slam Snuka. Piper grabs Dog and bites him in the corner as Orton goes up to the top. Orton tries a big splash but Snuka gets the knees up in time. Snuka headbutts Piper to the floor then follows him out. Piper sends Superfly into the ring post and trips up JYD as he bounces off the ropes. Orton drops a knee on Dog then rolls him cover, covers for 1…2….3 that’s it. Orton and Piper win it as Okerlund can’t believe it. Piper and Orton rush to the back with the losers pursuing. Monsoon says the crowd is stunned and the match cuts off right there. Was this unusual? Actually yeah, rarely do you see texas tornado rules in a WWF ring.

Time of match: An unofficial 7:55

Winners: Orton and Piper by pinfall
We go right to the next…..match so to speak. All it is, are highlights of an ancient women’s battle royal with Monsoon doing the voiceover.

Match 4

10 Women Battle Royal

Commentator: Gorilla Monsoon

Now this is a rarity. A women’s battle royal from the 1960’s. I can’t tell the exact date and at the start there are only 8 women in the ring. One of them is Donna Christianello, the rest Monsoon will have to fill us in on. Donna’s the one with the long black hair and she was trained by Fabulous Moolah. This battle royal has different rules as the only way to be eliminated is by pinfall. Now this will be one of the few times in history I’m going to go lazy-ass because other than Donna, I don’t have a clue who anyone is, so it’s impossible to call all the action. Before Monsoon takes over, Ventura’s voice over says the winner of the match would get a title shot against Fabulous Moolah. Yes, she was the chaAfter a tape edit that gets rid of two more girls, Monsoon gives us the run-down of Paula Kay, Black Panther, White Venus (who’s wearing a mask, which gives me 2 people I can spot instantly), Sue Green, Donna and Peggy Patterson.  Donna, Kay and Venus are thrown into each other by the other women. Another edit has Panther no longer with us as Venus executes a snap mare on Green. Kay puts the boots to Green. A little while later Kay and Green double cover Venus for the 3 count to eliminate her. Down to Green, Kay, Donna and Patterson. Here’s the funny thing, if this is the famous “Cowgirl” Sue Green, she would have to be 15-16 years old at the time of this match. Unless it’s a different Sue Green altogether….I don’t know.  Another edit shows Patterson and Green double-slingshotting the other two into the center of the ring. They do the same spot again to the other side. Two double monkeyflips by the babyfaces are followed by Kay and Donna seeking shelter under the bottom rope. A TAPE EDIT shows Sue tied up in the ropes while Paula snap mares and covers Peggy for nothing because the useless referee abandons the pinfall to check on Sue/Donna. He then gets down and counts to 2 then stops for some ungodly reason that even has Monsoon wondering what the hell is wrong with him on commentary. FINALLY he completes the 3 count and Peggy is sent to the showers leaving Sue alone with Donna and Paula. Once again we get TAPE EDITS up the wazoo which is uncalled for in a short match like this. Both Paula and Donna try to get the pinfall on Green but she kicks out both times. Paula goes for a slingshot on Sue but Donna’s standing behind her so Sue goes for the sunset flip….and blows it. Paula then starts grabbing on to her knees and its fairly obvious there’s supposed to be another slingshot going the other way. Sue slingshots Donna…who lands on her head, botching it as well. Usually women’s wrestling was far less crisp then mens back then, but this is reaching modern day diva levels. Kay eventually flips over but Donna’s on bottom. Even though DONNA is underneath Kay AND they tumbled into the ropes, THE IDIOT REF STILL COUNTS 3. The bell rings to boot as none of the women in the ring have any idea what’s going on. Green then does a running roll up on Donna and the ref counts to 3 again to end this disaster. Sue Green wins one of the ugliest women’s matches I’ve seen before the Diva era. Pretty impressive for a 16 year old. Was this an unusual match? Absolutely, even though it sucked.

Time of match: Who cares?

Winner: Sue Green

We go right into another battle royal, this one’s more recent and it’s at Madison Square Garden.

Match 5

20 Man Battle Royal

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Gene Okerlund

Heh, it’s the battle royal from The Brawl To End It All. This was one of the undercard matches on the July 23, 1984 broadcast on MTV in Madison Square Garden. The only match shown live was Moolah vs Richter but the undercard was shown on MSG network. We get the entrants first: Sika, Jose Luis Rivera, Butcher Vachon, Antonio Inoki, Tony Garea, Chief Jay Strongbow, Afa, Steve Lombardi, Dick Murdoch, Bob Orton, Adrian Adonis, Renee Goulet, Ron Shaw, Charlie Fulton, Terry Daniels, Iron Sheik, Tito Santana, Paul Orndorff, Sgt Slaughter and 20 year old Samu, yes THAT Samu that would later shrink heads. That’s a pretty international battle royal if you look at it. You have the Samoans representing Samoa, Tito Santana representing Mexico, Garea representing New Zealand, Inoki representing Japan, Sheik representing Iran, Goulet and Butcher representing Canada and Jose Luis representing Puerto Rico. I’d say the Samoans would have the advantage with 3 of them in the ring. As with any battle royal its mayhem to start. Slaughter dumps Lombardi pretty quick (big surprise) as Garea sneaks up on Butcher. Samu and Afa double-team Orton in the corner before we get a TAPE EDIT, dammit. About 5 or 6 guys are gone including Sheik, Strongbow, Fulton, Butcher and Orndorff which is stupid because what’s the point of showing an edited battle royal? Adonis goes upstairs but crotches himself when he’s met with a right hand by Inoki. Inoki catches him with a dropkick that sends him through the ropes, not over the top. Goulet chokes down Terry Daniels in the corner while Garea tries to eliminate Shaw to no avail. Samu holds Goulet and Sarge nails him with a right hand. Afa and Sika doubleteam Murdoch in the corner and Samu comes over only to rake the eyes of Murdoch…yeah, big help. Goulet has Sarge halfway out of the ring but Sika makes the save. Murdoch whips Adonis over to Slaughter but Sarge backdrops him over and out. Murdoch jumps on Sarge and they both tumble over the top and out. The camera scans the 10 remaining wrestlers and jobbers Ron Shaw and Terry Daniels go at it, that’s one way to stick around while everyone else is eliminating each other. The crowd gasps as one of the Samoans is dumped but the camera misses it. The other Samoan tries to dump Goulet as Samu comes over and whacks Goulet, which only drops him back in the ring. Again Samu is no help to his own family. The camera misses Santana getting tossed out as Goulet ducks a charge and the other Samoan is gone. Other than Orton and Inoki, most everyone left are jobbers or rookies like Samu. We’re down to 8, make it 7 when Goulet backdrops Rivera out. By the way, Rivera would later don a mask and wrestle as one of the Conquistadors in what is considered the greatest Survivor Series match of all time….but that’s 5 years from now. Back to present time, Inoki unloads on Samu with cat swipes then ducks a charge to eliminate him. Because of that, the camera misses Terry Daniels going out and we’re down to 5. Bob Orton, Antonio Inoki, Ron Shaw, Renee Goulet and Tony Garea…who would have seen that coming considering who else was involved? Inoki takes a breather as Goulet goes after Orton and Garea gets tangled up with Shaw. Orton drops Goulet with a forearm then nails Inoki with one. Orton scoop slams Inoki but misses an elbow drop. Inoki dropkicks Orton over the top but Bob catches himself…only to trip and fall off the apron. Down to the final four of Garea, Shaw, Goulet and Inoki…wow. Shaw kicks at Garea while Goulet pounds away on Inoki. Goulet and Shaw team up and toss Garea out. Shaw and Goulet shake hands as Inoki tries to rev up the crowd. Earlier on the card, Shaw lost to Sika in a one on one match so could he avenge his loss here? Looks like a big hell no as Inoki ducks under a double clothesline as Ron and Renee crash into the corner. The two eventually overpower Inoki and Shaw holds him for Goulet. Renee bounces off the ropes and….Inoki moves so Goulet clotheslines Shaw over the top and out. Inoki dropkicks Goulet but he’s too far away from the ropes. Inoki then grabs him and tosses him out the other side to win the match. This was the last match on the card as the entire crowd almost literally runs for the exit (Madison Square Garden had an 11 PM curfew at the time). Fink announces Inoki the winner as Shaw and Goulet are sprawled out on the cement. For those that don’t know, Inoki was the founder of New Japan Pro Wrestling which later provided WCW with a lot of top talent. Vince would get his guys from All-Japan, which was founded by Inoki’s wrestling school classmate, Giant Baba. Was this an unusual match? No, but there was an unusual winner so I guess ½ unusual.

Time of match: I don’t give a damn

Winner: Antonio Inoki

We go to one of the most legendary matches in WWF history.

Match 6

“Superfly” Jimmy Snuka (with Buddy Rogers) vs Don “Magnificent” Muraco for the WWF Intercontinental Championship in a Steel Cage Match

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Pat Patterson

October 17, 1983 in Madison Square Garden saw the culmination of a feud that had a greater impact on wrestling AFTER it had happened, which I’ll explain later. Snuka was a heel under the guidance of Captain Lou Albano but when former WWF Champion “Nature Boy” Buddy Rogers in a famous “Buddy’s Corner” (think Piper’s Pit only a few years earlier) segment convinced Snuka that Albano was no good, Jimmy turned on Lou and became the babyface we know today. Rogers would accompany Jimmy to the ring during the pre-Hulkamania years. Snuka and Rogers slowly check out the cage as they make their way around as Muraco shouts at them from inside. As Snuka and Rogers come around the right corner, a long haired teenager in a flannel shirt gives the “I love you” sign. We’ll get to him later. Finally Snuka gets in the cage and the crowd goes nuts. Muraco, in the black tights, ties up but delivers a forearm to the back. They brawl for a bit before Snuka drops the champ with a headbutt. Another tie up leads to Muraco taking a beating in the ropes. A big chop floors Muraco. Don crawls for the door but Jimmy stops him. Snuka rams Muraco’s head in the turnbuckle then delivers a big right hand. Jimmy rams Don into the other corner twice then chops him again. Don gets a knee to the mid-section then slingshots Snuka into the cage. Snuka is busted wide open as Muraco puts the boots to him. Muraco grates Jimmy’s head into the cage then unloads with right hands. Muraco whips Jimmy into the corner but a charge eats knee. Snuka climbs to the top but Don stops him with a forearm to the back. Don rams Jimmy’s head into the cage then foolishly picks him up in a fireman’s carry. Snuka catches himself on the top of the cage then knocks Muraco crotch first onto the top rope. Snuka nails Muraco back in the ring as Monsoon scoffs (and so do I) at Jimmy for not climbing out of the cage at this point with Muraco down. Jimmy tries to climb down but Muraco nails him with a rib shot then powerslams him into the center of the ring. Don heads for the door but Jimmy catches him at the last second. Muraco then mule kicks him in the gonads as Monsoon says its legal. Jimmy reverses a whip and Muraco half-Flair flips into the corner. Jimmy rams Muraco into the cage and now he’s busted open too. Jimmy gets fired up and drops Don with a big right hand. He scoop slams the champ then goes upstairs. Jimmy drops a fist from the second rope as the crowd comes alive. Snuka rallies with right hands and another chop that sends Muraco to the canvas. Jimmy stuns Don with a headbutt, bounces off the ropes and nails Muraco with a flying headbutt….but oh no! Muraco flips over the top rope and out of the cage, which means MURACO WINS! Snuka can’t believe it as Patterson says it was an accident. Snuka screams as he leaves the cage and prevents Muraco from leaving. He tosses Muraco back in for some extracurricular activity. Jimmy suplexes Muraco into the middle of the cage then goes upstairs. He then looks behind him and climbs all the way to the top of the cage. Monsoon “SUPERFLY PERCHED 15 FEET HIGH!” The long haired teenager in the flannel shirt watched in amazement as Snuka lept off the top of the cage and nailed Muraco with a Superfly splash. The crowd goes crazy as Snuka grabs the IC belt and poses with it for the crowd. Jimmy drops the belt on Muraco’s fallen body and does the “I love you pose” Jimmy makes his exit as Muraco twitches on the canvas. Monsoon goes to the replay of Snuka diving off the cage as the doctor at ringside tends to Muraco inside. We cut the action here but I’m glad they kept the entire match intact as well as the historic finish. By the way, that long-haired teenager in the flannel shirt was 18 year old Mick Foley. When he saw Snuka leap off the cage he got inspired to become a wrestler himself. So Muraco/Snuka in a cage had a much more lasting impression on the wrestling world because of Mick Foley than the actual feud itself. So was this an unusual match? Cage matches back then were the feud enders plus we saw Mick Foley before he ever got in the business so I say sure. The match itself wasn’t anything special but given the level of intensity, plus the finish, good stuff!

Time of match: 6:42

Winner: Don Muraco (still IC Champion)

As anti-climatic as it sounds, the cage match didn’t end the feud. A few months later the managers would get involved and a tag match would take place. Only it would be Snuka teaming with Arnold Skaaland against Captain Lou and Muraco. Apparently Rogers got hurt in training for the match and Arnie took his place.

Match 7

“Captain” Lou Albano and Don “Magnificent” Muraco vs “The Golden Boy” Arnold Skaaland and Jimmy “Superfly” Snuka

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Pat Patterson

With Buddy Rogers out, 58 year old Arnold Skaaland gets back in the ring to assist Snuka against Muraco and Albano. Albano was 50 years old himself at the time of the match. Snuka was 40 believe it or not with Muraco bringing up the rear at 34. We’re back at Madison Square Garden on December 26, 1983, the night Sheik defeated Backlund for the world title. Skaaland and Muraco start with a tie up as Patterson says not to count Arnie out due to his age. Skaaland and Albano are no strangers to each other either. 16 years earlier Skaaland and his partner Spiros Arion dropped the WWWF US Tag Team Titles to The Sicillians (Albano and Tony Altimore). Muraco (wearing the black tights) gets the upperhand as Ventura’s voice-over explains the upcoming contest (why couldn’t they have done this BEFORE the action started?). Muraco misses a charge in the corner and Skaaland (in the blue tights) arm-drags Muraco twice. Muraco clears his head then methodically stalks Arnie. A sideheadlock is applied before Skaaland sends Muraco off who jumps over Skaaland then stops to give the arm and the elbow to Snuka. Don turns around into a scoop slam by Skaaland. Albano interferes and is met with a big right hand. A TAPE EDIT shows Muraco now tying up with Skaaland. Arnie gets sent off who nails Albano in the corner with a big forearm. Muraco charges and Arnie catches him with a nice inside cradle for 1..2..nope. Not bad for a guy who would turn 59 less than a month later. Muraco bails to clear his head then re-enters. Muraco swipes at Skaaland as we go to the replay of the small package. Skaaland crawls under the legs of Muraco and tags in the Superfly. Muraco backs off but with a cocky smirk on his face while Albano paces on the apron. The camera cuts to a shot of the crowd and misses Snuka onloading on Albano.  Muraco gets Snuka in a headlock, sends him off and drops him with a shoulderblock. Snuka does his trademark leapfrogs then drops Muraco with a big chop. A jumping headbutt floors Muraco. Jimmy makes the cover but only gets a 2, then applies a rest hold. The ref gives Albano shit as a kid in the front row takes a swig of coke. Muraco begins to power up as Snuka yells at Albano. Monsoon makes note that Lou hasn’t been in the match yet. Muraco breaks free and tags in Albano right on cue. Albano comes in and begs off in a circle then goes to give Jimmy a hug. Jimmy is not in a hugging mood and he greets Lou with a kick to the gut and a chop, Albano barely sells either. Jimmy goes for another chop but Albano no sells it and punches Snuka in the gonads, ouch. Jimmy staggers into the corner where Albano delivers a forearm to the back. Albano unloads on Jimmy with the heavy artillery and a rake to the eyes. Lou then distracts the refree and Muraco then goes upstairs to deliver a standing knee to the throat. The ref turns around and Muraco puts his hands up then bails. Referee Gil Roman is asleep apparently. Albano continues to unload on Snuka then tags Muraco back in. A double knee lift drops Snuka then a running knee lift floors him again. A big thumb to the eye has Superfly rolling around in agony. A series of boots and an elbow sends Jimmy to the canvas. Arnold looks on intently and Snuka begins to rally with right hands and a headbutt. A chop decks Muraco but Snuka goes to attack Albano. Don dropkicks Snuka in the back then tags in Lou. Albano continues to punch/kick Snuka around then tags Don in. Muraco holds Snuka but Jimmy moves and Albano nails Muraco instead. Skaaland interferes to attack Albano in the corner. Snuka sneaks to the top rope as Muraco turns around into a flying bodypress. The cover 1..2…3 and its over, Snuka’s team wins it. Snuka rams Lou and Don’s heads together after the bell. Patterson cuts off mid-sentence as apparently Albano was giving him shit. Fink announces the winners as we cut right there. Well that was average at best. Did it belong on this kind of tape, hell no! Like I said, it was anti-climatic after the cage match plus all Albano did was stumble and bumble around. I will say at least Skaaland and Albano were trained professionals, unlike when celebs get in the ring nowadays.

Time of match: An un-official 8:16

Winners: Jimmy Snuka and Arnold Skaaland

Moving right along to one from the archives. This one goes back to the late 70’s.

Match 8

Haystacks Calhoun “High Chief” Peter Maivia and Larry Zybysko vs Butcher Vachon, Moose Monroe and Strong Kobayashi

Commentator: Vince McMahon

We go back to the WW…WF when Vince McMahon Sr was running the show. Back then you had guys coming in and out of the territory unless they homesteaded like Bruno Sammartino. This is supposed to highlight Haystacks who was a legitimate 600 pounds. What about the rest? Well we know Butcher and Zybysko from previous tapes. Peter Maivia is the grandfather of The Rock and father-in-law of “Soulman” Rocky Johnson, which is the inspiration for Rock’s original name of “Rocky Maivia”. Maivia was also one tough son of a bitch, his tribal tattoos down his abs and legs were done over a period of 3 days using a hammer, needle and ink. None of this lazer shit, he had it done the hard way. Kobayashi was in town from Japan, most notably the International Wrestling Enterprise. Moose Monroe was a standard jobber of the 70’s. Haystacks was the Andre the Giant of his time. He basically had the same career too only 15 years earlier. The fact he was a hillbilly paved the way for future bumpkins Hillbilly Jim, Cousin Luke, Uncle Elmer, The Godwinns, etc. At one point, Haystacks was the LIGHTER wrestler in a match with the 800 pound Happy Humphrey. Think Yokozona was too fat by the end of his run in WWF, add on another 200 pounds and that’s what Humphrey was. Anyway back to the actual match, Zybysko stars with Kobayashi who chickens out and Butcher gets in. Zybysko arm drags Vachon twice before tagging in Calhoun. Butcher tags in Monroe as Haystacks stalks him. Calhoun puts him in a full nelson but none of his babyface teammates want to take a cheap shot. Butcher interferes but the ref shoos him away. Finally Zybysko gets in a cheap shot (of course it had to be him) and Haystacks throws Monroe into the corner. Haystacks is wearing is standard overalls and black t-shirt, Zybysko has black tights and Maivia has pink ones. Monroe has the Baron Von Raschke-esque red and black combo pants. Calhoun does a series of avalanches in the corner on Monroe then applies a bear-hug. Zybysko tags in where he rallies with right hands and dropping Moose with a knee to the gut. Maivia tags in who is all smiles as he delivers a stomach-breaker. Calhoun tags in and delivers a sloppy big splash. As he covers, Maivia actually runs on top of him then jumps onto Kobayashi as the ref counts 1..2…3 to end it. Zybysko had actually ran up Calhoun to deliver a flying forearm to Butcher as well. The match cuts right there. Was this an unusual match? No. Did it have unusual participants? Yes. Haystacks was the Andre the Giant of the 60’s and Peter Maivia was one of the first Samoans to make it in New York. Unfortunately, Peter died of cancer in June of 1982, 3 years before the tape was released. So while the match may have been a boring squash, least it contained some rare stars that are hardly ever talked about anymore.

Time of match: Joined in progress

Winners: Haystacks Calhoun, Peter Maivia and Larry Zybysko

On to the final match of the tape, the one that teased us in BLOOPERS, BLEEPS AND BODYSLAMS, the 10 men, 3 out of 5 fall tag match.

Match 9

“Playboy” Buddy Rose, “Superstar” Billy Graham, Ray “Crippler” Stevens, Mr. Fuji, and Don “Magnificent” Muraco (with Captain Lou Albano) vs Jimmy “Superfly” Snuka, Pedro Morales, Salvatore Bellomo, Rocky Johnson and Andre the Giant

Commentator: Gorilla Monsoon

Lot of talent in that ring all around, this is going to be a long one due to it being 3 out of 5 falls with a TWO HOUR time limit. We’re at the Philadelphia Spectrum on February 19, 1983. We got 3 WWF champions in Graham, Morales and Andre with Muraco the reigning IC champ. Rose and Stevens held multiple AWA tag team titles (with different partners) and Mr Fuji was a former WWF tag team champion. Snuka and Belomo never won any gold but Snuka never had to, he was a top draw on his own. Johnson starts in the ring with Fuji but the devious one backs Johnson into the face side of the ring. Fuji gets in a wrist-lock but Johnson rolls out of it and nips backwards. He rallies with his Ali right hands and drops Fooj. Ventura is talking over the action trying to introduce everyone and go over the rules. Fuji tags out to Buddy Rose. Buddy gets a headlock then nails Johnson with a shoulderblock only for Johnson to pop up, leapfrog and catapult Rose across the ring. Rose charges into two arm-drags before Stevens tags in. He eats two arm-drags before he crawls to the corner to tag in Muraco. We get a TAPE EDIT and now Snuka’s in the ring with Muraco. Snuka goes to town on Muraco before tagging in Morales, Morales floors Don with a forearm to the chest and revs up the crowd before tagging in Andre. Andre shoots Muraco in the ropes then delivers a big boot that sends Don over the top rope to the floor. Stevens and Rose come over to help him back in and once inside, Muraco locks in a headlock on the giant who gets sent off the ropes and runs into the huge posterior of Andre. Muraco sells it like he took a cannon shot to the ribs. Stevens tags in and begs off as we get another TAPE EDIT and now its Bellomo in with Muraco. Poor Bellomo, he was the least known out of all 10 men. Muraco gets him up in an airplane spin. Round and round he goes and then falls backwards (haha) with Bellomo on top for 1..2..no. A dizzy Muraco tags out to Rose who puts Bellomo in another airplane spin. He drops him and goes to make a tag only its in the wrong corner. Johnson scares Rose away into his own corner who tags in Mr. Fuji. Fooj delivers a thrust to the throat then Stevens tags in to pound away at Salvatore. Stevens goes for the blatant choke but Bellomo gets an elbow to the gut then makes the tag to Superfly. Stevens begs off but Snuka goes through his offense before Stevens tags in Muraco, who runs into a jumping headbutt Snuka tags in Morales who has a score to settle since it was Muraco who dethroned him as IC champ. Muraco backs up right into the arms of Andre, who holds him as Morales unloads with the heavy artillery. Johnson tags in to do the Ali jabs before finishing with a right hand that drops Don. Andre tags in and Muraco begs off. Andre headbutts Muraco who gets his head stuck in the top rope on the face side. We get another TAPE EDIT and now Bellomo has the headlock on Fuji. A standing dropkick by Salvatore floors Fuji then drops him with a shoulderblock. Bellomo charges right into an over the head belly-to-belly suplex, the cover by Fuji gets 1…2..3 and the first fall goes to Team Muraco. Per rules, Bellomo and Fuji have to start the second fall. Fuji continues to work over Salvatore before picking him up for a scoop slam. Snuka comes off the top rope with a dropkick that sends Bellomo crashing down on Fuji, Dick Woehrle gets down 1..2…3 and we’re tied up at one fall apiece just like that. The faces celebrate as Bellomo gets a rest in the corner. A TAPE EDIT has Bellomo crawling away from Buddy Rose but the Playboy catches him. Bellomo gets in some defensive shots before tagging in Snuka. Rose sends him off but Superfly leapfrogs over him then slides under for a sunset flip that apparently gets a 3 count. Monsoon’s overdub commentary eliminated the sound and the camera angle was off. Rose jumps up in protest as the faces take a 2 to 1 lead. One more and they win. Snuka and Rose tie up and Buddy gets in a headlock. They do the same sequence as before only Snuka does his leapfrog/chop combo that sends Playboy flying.  Andre tags in and chops Rose down, he gets to his feet but is clobbered with a big right hand from Andre. Rose goes for a tag but Graham doesn’t want in so Fuji reluctantly does. Thanks to the editing, Graham hasn’t been in the match yet it seems. Fuji gets whacked but disorients Andre with a double slap to the ears. Muraco tags in and nails Andre with a forearm to the chest. Stevens grabs Andre from the outside but the Giant headbutts him away. Muraco goes up to the top rope but Andre catches him and slams him down to the mat. Andre sends him off the ropes and staggers the IC champ with a big chop. Muraco falls into his corner but again Graham avoids the tag and Rose reluctantly makes it. Andre brings him in the hard way and then does a double noggin knocker with Superfly, ha! Andre sends Rose off and delivers a big boot. Andre sits on him and the ref counts 1..2…3 and its over. Team Andre wins it 3 falls to 1 as Billy Graham does absolutely nothing. For extracurricular activity, Andre clocks Stevens too. The fans goes wild as Bellomo unloads on Graham who no-sells everything and simply leaves the ring. Muraco’s team retreats as Team Andre celebrates in the ring.

Time of match: Who cares?

Winners: Andre the Giant, Salvatore Bellomo, Pedro Morales, Jimmy Snuka and Rocky Johnson by pinfall

The orchestral theme hits as the credits roll. The after-preview Ventura says “available this June, Wrestlemania!” Wait, Wrestlemania was the 4^th tape released and this was the 5^th, how was it released BEFORE Wrestlemania? Anyway the 2 hour cassette was listed for $39.95 retail….hahahaha. I know its Wrestlemania but not even blu rays are worth that much these days. 40 dollars in 85 is like 70 today.  Monsoon takes over to preview BEST OF THE WWF VOLUME 3 then BIGGEST, SMALLEST, STRANGEST, SMALLEST and finally ROWDY RODDY PIPER’S GREATEST HITS. So were these the most unusual matches? For the most part yes. It was standard 1980’s action with the focus on showmanship more than mat based wrestling. For the most part the tape is worth picking up but certainly nothing to break the bank for. 3 stars out of 5. One point off because of the edit jobs and another point off for the women’s match. The next tape after this is ANDRE THE GIANT, another profile tape.

Wrestlemania 1 (WF004)

WRESTLEMANIA 1 (WF004)

After BEST OF THE WWF VOLUME 1 came the first WRESTLEMANIA. There’s a lot of backstory that went into the making of it and I’ll try to do the best I can to piece it all together. It started when Vince McMahon Jr purchased Georgia Championship Wrestling from Jim Barnett in May of 1984. GCW had been broadcast on Ted Turner owned TBS “The Superstation” for a decade and it featured classic NWA wrestling. In what would later be called “Black Saturday”, on July 14, 1984 Vince McMahon appeared on Georgia Championship and switched the programming from NWA wrestling to re-runs of WWF matches. The predominantly southern fans revolted as the difference in product between the NWA and WWF was severe. Instead of classic wrestling they got cartoon wrestling. The ratings hit the toilet almost immediately and Turner was pissed. To get back at Vince, Ted allowed a half hour timeslot for Ole Anderson’s Championship Wrestling From Georgia featuring anyone that refused to go to the WWF when first bought (among those were Jake Roberts, Gordon Solie and Ted Dibiase). Vince was pissed and felt that only he should be allowed on the Superstation. Turner told him to improve the ratings or get lost. Vince then sold his timeslot to Jim Crockett Promotions for a huge chunk of cash. What did he do with that cash? That’s the second part of the story. While all this was going on, in his own company, Hulkamania was running wild. Hulk Hogan was a huge ratings draw wherever he was booked and was starting to get national attention. Something was missing though, Vince knew if he wanted to hit the big time, he needed to be in the mainstream. That’s when a lucky plane ride changed the course of wrestling history. Captain Lou Albano just happened to be on the same plane as rock star Cindy Lauper and the two struck up a friendship. Cindy then asked Lou to play the role of her father on her world famous video “Girls Just Wanna Have Fun”. Soon after Cindy began popping up at WWF events which led to MTV taking notice. In what would become the “Rock N Wrestling Connection” 9 days after Vince started airing his crap on GCW, MTV aired “Brawl To End It All” which launched WWF into the national spotlight. This was followed up by “War To Settle The Score” which featured Hulk Hogan taking on top heel “Rowdy” Roddy Piper (who was stolen from the NWA a year prior). Now with the mainstream attention and a huge chunk of change from the GCW sale, Vince needed a home run show. Supercards were nothing new, Starrcade 83 had been the most successful for the NWA. Vince knew he needed something bigger. Something that would revolutionize the wrestling business and how supercards should be run. TV tough guy Mr. T had befriended Hulk Hogan and Vince decided to run a supercard featuring a tag match featuring his top heels (Piper and Paul Orndorff) and Hogan/T. He had the venue set for Madison Square Garden and he had the finance, he just needed a name. Howard Finkel…yes, The Fink himself suggested “Wrestlemania” and Vince ran with it. Shown on closed-circuit television, Wrestlemania 1, the first of what would become the pinnacle of wrestling events was held on March 31, 1985 and it featured the biggest showdown of the year with television superstar Mr T along with WWF Champion Hulk Hogan taking on the biggest heel in not only the WWF but in wrestling as well “Rowdy” Roddy Piper and “Mr. Wonderful” Paul Orndorff. I’m not kidding about the heel line, even though Flair was a heel as a part of The Horsemen he was loved in his role and over in the AWA did anyone give a damn about Stan Hansen? Piper was definately the number 1 heel in wrestling at this point so to see him get his possible comeuppance from the Hulkster was something everyone wanted to see.  Also included was the famous 15,000 dollar slam match where if Andre slammed Big John Studd he’d win 15 grand but if Studd won Andre would retire. Plus we get a tag team title match between the original Un-Americans Nikolai Volkoff and Iron Sheik against the US Express Barry Whindam and Mike Rotundo. This event started it all so let’s get right down to it. Vince McMahon’s voice appears and runs down the card before we get sent to Monsoon, Ventura and Gene Okerlund who sings the national anthem (ugh).

MARCH 31, 1985

MADISON SQUARE GARDEN

NEW YORK, NY

Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon and Jesse “The Body” Ventura
Match 1

Tito Santana vs The Executioner

You know…..I think its really dumb they had to hide “Playboy” Buddy Rose (The Executioner) like this, but since this was a one time appearance I guess it was justified. I still get a kick how Mean Gene Okerlund would interview both participants in the matches mere seconds after the other departed the screen…and this was back when kayfabe was still a big deal. Executioner (who clearly looks and sounds like Buddy Rose) says he’s gonna go after Santana’s leg while Tito says he’s gonna win….arriba! Bells gone and they run the ropes adjacent from each other before Santana hits a backdrop and a dropkick on The Executioner who falls through the ropes to the outside. Ventura “Woodstock was to rock n roll what Wrestlemania is to wrestling” well put. Back inside Santana hits a headlock who walks up the rope and turns it into a headlock takeover. Executioner and Santana trade blows before Executioner takes over in the corner and hits a knee to the solar plexus. Executioner goes for a figure four but Santana blocks it, then he goes for a step over toe wrench which Santana counters into a cradle for a near fall. Santana fires away in the corner and goes for a piledriver, but Executioner counters with a back drop. He hits a bodyslam and goes upstairs but Santana catches him with a slam off the top. Santana goes for a big splash but Executioner gets the knees up just in time, then he works over the left leg on the second rope before Tito kicks him over the top rope into the time-keeper’s table. Tito hits a power slam from the apron to the ring and hits the flying forearm out of nowhere. Tito drags him to the center of the ring and locks in the figure four as Executioner submits quickly though the time keeper’s asleep and takes forever to ring the bell. Howard Finkel gets in the ring with the official word as Santana takes the first match in Wrestlemania history.

Time of Match: 4:40

Winner: Tito Santana by submission
Alfred Hays in the aisle way shills the upcoming Bundy/Jones showdown who sends it to Okerlund who interviews Jones first. SD “I’m gonna get down with the biggest man in town” and 5 seconds after Jones leaves in walks Bundy and Hart…..like I said earlier, this was back when kayfabe was a real big deal so we’re supposed to believe Bundy let him stand there and say all this stuff? Bundy says he’s gonna avalanche the poor guy and get the 5 count. Back to ringside….

Match 2

King Kong Bundy (with Jimmy Hart) vs SD Jones

SD Jones was your basic mid-card face at the time while Bundy was a rising monster heel, fresh from being a member of the Legion of Doom in the NWA. Jones runs into Bundy at the bell and Kong catches him in a bearhug then rams him into the corner. Jones crumples to the floor then gets up as Bundy hits the avalanche followed by the big splash for 1…2….3 and its over just like that. Monsoon and Ventura can’t believe it as Howard Finkel gets on the mic. “Time of the fall….9 SECONDS…your winner King Kong Bundy” Um, what? I specifically counted 23 seconds (which Monsoon ironically says is the previous record) so this was all just hooplah to get Bundy over as Hogan’s future opponent.

Time of match: 23 seconds

Winner: King Kong Bundy by pinfall

Back to Alfred Hays who shills the upcoming match as Bundy makes his way back to the locker room. Mean Gene interviews Borne first and he says Steamboat’s too nice of a guy and he’s gonna beat him up then Ricky comes in and scoffs at Borne for basically calling him a wuss and says he’s gonna take him out.

Match 3

“Maniac” Matt Borne vs Ricky Steamboat

This could be the sleeper as match of the night because Borne was more talented than he looked (and this was 8 years before he became Doink the Clown) and we all know how great Steamboat was. Borne was competing in tboth Portland and Mid-South when he was brought in for the match. Ventura hypes Matt’s father “Tough” Tony Borne who wrestled many moons ago including an encounter with Gorilla himself. They tie up to start before Steamboat leapfrogs over Borne and goes for the double chop but Matt catches himself, then runs into the double chop anyway. Steamboat hits a snap mare and a headlock as Monsoon hypes up him and Jimmy Snuka as possible tag team title contenders. Steamboat rolls through an atomic drop attempt and hits one of his own, then mocks Borne’s selling of the maneuver. Steamboat goes back to the side headlock before Borne hits an inverted atomic drop and a knee lift. Borne fires away in the corner but Steamboat hits a boot to the head (yeah yeah!) and a chop from the second rope. Steamboat hits another double karate chop as the announcers shill Ricky’s physique and Borne’s intelligence. Borne backs Ricky in the corner and hits a series of knee’s to the mid-section followed by a BtB suplex. Matt hits a snap suplex and covers for 1..2…nope, they trade blows in the ring before Steamboat gets the upper hand with karate chops. Steamboat hits a back suplex, a reverse neckbreaker and 2 knee drops for a cover of 1..2…nope. Steaboat leapfrogs over Borne and hits some sort of double punch to the face, then he goes upstairs and hits the FLYING CROSSBODY for 1…2….three and we have a winner. Short and sweet….so much for my match of the night prediction.

Time of match: 4:38

Winner: Ricky Steamboat by pinfall

Back to Alfred Hays who hypes up the upcoming Sammartino/Beefcake showdown before sending it over to Okerlund with the pre-match interview. David says he and his dad have been training hard and he’s gonna avenge Hillbilly Jim by taking Beefcake out before Bruno says if Johnny V interferes he’s gonna knock him out.  Beefcake and Johnny enter WHILE DAVID IS STILL ON SCREEN….are u kidding me, Verne Gagne would have a heart attack if he saw this going on in the AWA. Anyway Johnny V cuts a funny promo that’s too fast to be mentioned here so let’s go back to ringside. Its funny how Johnny Valiant became a manager for WWF while brother Jimmy was still competing for Crockett at this time.
Match 4

Brutus Beefcake (with Johnny Valiant) vs David Sammartino (with Bruno Sammartino)

Poor David, the old man’s shoes were too big to fill and even when matched up against a stiff like Beefcake, he STILL gets laughed at. There’s no referee in the ring so they stall for a while as Monsoon and Ventura discuss the possibility of Beefcake being “Luscious” Johnny Valiant’s son. They exchange tie-ups after the bell before David hits a drop-toe hold as the camera pans to Bruno outside. They exchange go-behinds and takedowns before Brutus slides under the ring and regroups with Valiant. Back inside David hits a series of old school takedowns and goes to the front headlock, a Sammartino trademark. Beefcake threatens to pound the ref before David counters a scoop slam with an arm-bar. David drops a leg on the left shoulder before Beefcake gets up and hits a high school style headlock for 1…2..nope. Brutus hits a shoulder-block and an arm=drag but Sammartino nips up and catches Beefcake with a double toe-hold. Beefcake powers out of it but David catches the leg and applies a step-over. Brutus counters a figure four attempt but Sammartino continues with the leg lock as Beefcake doesn’t even sell it….seriously, he adjusts his arm pads and barely looks like he’s in pain. Beefcake gets a thumb to the eye and hits a backdrop before hitting a series of forearms to the sternum. Beefcake hits a scoop slam and goes back on offense with elbows in the corner. Beefcake hits a hard irish whip into the corner, poses, then hits a series of knees to the mid-section. Bruno gets the crowd to chant for David as Beefcake runs straight into a back body-drop. Sammartino rallies with clubbing right hands and jabs before hitting a weak looking boot to the mid-section. David hits a big knee to the head and a snap suplex then covers for 1…2..negative. Beefcake throws David out of the ring where Valiant pounces and slams him on the concrete floor…causing the old man to toss Valiant in the ring for an ass kicking. Bruno waffles Johnny with a series of forearms before Beefcake pounds away to stop the momentum. David comes over and all 4 men go at it as the ref calls for the bell before the Sammartino’s clean house. The crowd erupts but then boos when Finkel announces the match is a draw. The first and last appearance of David Sammartino on any major WWF event as Beefcake was just getting started.

Time of match: 11:40

Winner: No one…double DQ

Back to Alfred Hays who shills the upcoming IC title match before sending it over to Gene Okerlund for the pre-match interviews. Valentine says he’s the master of the figure four and he’s gonna hammer JYD before Dog comes in and says he’s going to get his hands on Jimmy Hart. Back to ringside with Gorilla and Jesse.

Match 5

Junkyard Dog vs Greg “The Hammer” Valentine (with Jimmy Hart) for the WWF Intercontinental Championship

JYD, one of the most popular black athletes in wrestling history gets a title shot here. JYD had come over from Mid-South wrestling (damn near crippling the promotion as he was the top star) for this one. Valentine enters first as Another One Bites The Dust hits and JYD enters. I should point out JYD is the first person to use entrance music as everyone else to this point didn’t have any. They fake hitting each other as JYD jukes and jives to the crowd’s delight before hitting an arm twister. Valentine whips JYD off but Dog catches the foot then catches Greg with a right hand. Valentine hits a knee and an elbow but misses a forearm so JYD hits his trademark headbutts on the ground before the camera pans to the Garden crowd. Monsoon says Hart is now the manager of Jim Niedhart, Bundy and Valentine before Valentine goes back on offense. Greg hits a forearm to the back of the neck and an elbow drop to the mid-section before going over the right leg of JYD. Valentine goes for a half-crab and stretches the knee as the crowd begins to roar for JYD. Valentine hits a headbutt to the midsection but JYD counters the figure four attempt and sells the injury well. Valentine works him over in the corner before Dog rallies with right hands and headbutts as Valentine does the flop. Jimmy Hart gets on the apron and Dog grabs him but moves out of the way causing Valentine
to hammer Jimmy to the floor. Dog backs Valentine in the corner with forearm and a headbutt before Valentine rake the eyes and scoops the legs with his feet on the rope for 1…2…3 and Valentine wins it. All of a sudden Tito Santana hits the ring and tells the ref Valentine had his foot on the rope. All of a sudden the ref calls for the match to continue making him the smartest ref in the history of wrestling up to this point, but Valentine wants no part of it and stays out of the ring. Dog wins by count-out but the title does not change hands on a count-out so The Hammer is still the champ. Santana and Dog taunt Valentine in the ring as Greg teases getting in to fight them before walks to the back. That was supposed to be a 1 hour time limit and it didn’t even go 7 minutes…..the next 4 matches better be long because this is crash style so far.

Time of match: 6:53

Winner:  Junkyard Dog by count-out (Valentine retains the title)

Back to Hays who shills the upcoming tag team title match before sending it over to Okerlund for the pre-match interviews. Sheik says down with America while my favorite manager of all time Blassie says we’re looking at the next champions. Gene “Ok commie…er comrade” Volkoff “I came, I saw, I conquer” Albano walks in with a beer in his hand and says the Express is gonna win, now THAT’S confidence.

Match 6

The Un-Americanz (Nikolai Volkoff and Iron Sheik) with Freddie Blassie vs The US Express (Barry Windham and Mike Rotundo) with Captain Lou Albano for the WWF Tag Team Championship

The men who would become IRS and The Stalker (father and uncle of a Wyatt family member too) take on Sheik and Volkoff here. The Express had beaten the North/South Connection (Adrian Adonis and Dick Murdoch) for the belts two months prior. Before the match Nikolai does his pre-match ritual by singing the Soviet National Anthem as the Garden crowd heaves garbage in the ring. Sheik “RUSSIA NUMBA VUN….IRAN NUMBA VUN…AMERICA HACK PATOIE!” Born in the USA by Bruce “The Boss” Springstein hits and the Express make their entrance. With 3 out of the 4 wrestlers in their prime, this could be the sleeper that Borne/Steamboat wasn’t. Rotundo starts off with Sheik as Ventura says you’ll see bad world series and superbowls but not Wrestlemania….yah wait until Wrestlemania 11. Rotundo hits an armdrag, dropkick, a scoop slam and a headlock takedown as Ventura shills. Windham makes the tag and hits an elbow from off the top rope then hits a boot to the mid-section. Sheik backs Barry back in the corner and Volkoff holds, but Windham escapes and Sheik dropicks Volkoff instead. Volkoff tags in and the camera shows an instant replay of the dropkick before going back to live action where Rotundo hits a back elbow smash. IRS…er Mike locks in an arm-bar then tags in Windham who once again comes off the top onto the elbow. Rotundo follows with the same elbow drop before Nikolai takes over and rams Rotundo’s head into Sheik’s legendary loaded boot. Sheik backdrops Rotundo and hits an elbow drop for 1…2…nope, near fall. Iron Sheik executes a gut-wrench suplex and covers for a deuce before Rotundo blocks a snap suplex and hits one of his own. Nikolai tags in and drops him throat first on the top rope as Blassie shouts “Kick em!” Rotundo switches out of a hammerlock as the crowd gets a USA chant going. Mike hits a sunset flip for 1..2…noooo, Volkoff quickly gets up and puts the boots to him. Volkoff hits a knee to the mid-section and boots before ramming Mike’s head once again into Sheik’s boot. The heels double team Rotundo before Sheik applies an abdominal stretch as the camera pans to Blassie and Albano trading invectives. Rotundo escapes and Volkoff tags in but Mike finally makes it to Windham, who fires away at Nikolai with fists and a dropkick. Windham hits the bulldog and covers for 1..2…nope, Sheik cuts him off. Rotundo gets in and dropkicks Sheik to the floor but Blassie sneaks the cane into Sheik’s hands. The ref is distracted by Rotundo as Sheik breaks the cane over the back of Windham who crumbles to the floor. Nikolai rolls him over and covers for 1….2…3 and we got new tag team champions. Iron Sheik becomes the first superstar since Bob Backlund to be both World champion and Tag champion in their careers. I should point out the Express left the company not long after this and Windham wouldn’t compete in another Wrestlemania for 12 more years while Rotundo resurfaced 7 years later as I.R.S.

Time of match: 6:51

Winners: The Un-Americanz by pinfall (New Tag Team Champions)

Mean Gene interviews the new champs and scoffs at Blassie for using the cane. Freddie “Cane? What cane? I didn’t have no cane!” Sheik says Gene Mean and spits at the US again as Okerlund sends it back to Monsoon and Ventura who goes over what we just saw. Back to Alfred Hays who shills the upcoming $15,000 slam match who sends it back to Okerlund for the pre-match interviews. Studd and Heenan enter with the duffel bag of money and its funny to see Okerlund try to stick his hand in as Heenan swats it away. Heenan “There’s only 2 people that are gonna see this money, me and Studd….make it 3, the teller at the bank when we deposit the money.” The next segment is shilling Wrestlemania merchandise which makes no sense because the announcer dude says “pick it up in the corridors” which is an insinuation people watching this commercial is at the Garden? Whatever….on to the match.

Match 7

Andre the Giant vs Big John Studd (with Bobby Heenan) in a $15,000 Slam Match

Ok, the rules are simple…..if Andre bodyslams Studd he wins 15 grand but if Studd slams Andre then say goodbye to the Giant. Studd attacks Andre in the corner as the bell rings before Andre rallies with chop and a big headbutt. Andre boots Studd to the outside of the ring and John regroups with Heenan, back inside Andre taunts Studd until backing him into the corner. Andre chokes Studd in the corner and Ventura asks where the ref is, but this isn’t a standard wrestling match so there are no DQ’s to speak of. Andre hits a knee to the head and big hamhock to the head before executing avalanches in the corner. Studd goes for a bodyslam but Andre blocks it then chops away at Studd before hitting a bearhug. The fants chats for Andre to slam as Ventura says “25,000 strong chanting”…..thought the building only held about 17,000 but nevertheless it is a sell out. The bearhug spot is worked for 2 full minutes before letting go and hitting a forearm to the back as Ventura says this could be the last time we could be seeing Andre. Andre hits a headlock and hits another hamhock to the mid-section as the crowd erupts. Andre whips Studd off and catches the foot, then hits another right hand to the face. Andre blocks a back elbow smash before chopping John in the corner. Andre kicks away at Studd’s leg and I’ll let Monsoon handle this one. “Andre now going to work on the leg, LOOK AT THIS…ANDRE PICKS EM UP…HE SLAMMED HIM!!!” This one’s over and Andre wins the match as the crowd erupts again as Finkel hands Andre the bag of money. Andre begins throwing money into the crowd before Heenan sneaks up, steals the bag then runs to the back with Studd. Ventura “They don’t call him The Brain for nothin Gino!” Andre poses in the ring and his career will resume….for a few more years anyway. I look at this match not for the catch-as-catch-can but for the drama and the storyline because in 1985, 15 grand or retire was a big deal so this match certainly was legendary. Screw the ROH smarks and spotfest lovers.

Time of match: 5:52

Winner: Andre the Giant

Back to Okerlund who interviews Andre who says in his booming voice that he doesn’t care about the money and tries cutting a promo but is cut off as we send it back to Monsoon and Ventura. The man just saved his career, let him speak dammit! We send it back to Alfred Hays who tries to shill the upcoming women’s match but is cut off by Moolah who kisses him on the lips. Alfred “Good gracious!” then Leilani kisses him before he finally sends it to Mean Gene. Okerlund interviews Lauper and Richter then Cyndi in her thick Brooklyn accent she’s gonna get her hands on Moolah. Richter says she’s gonna get her belt back as the camera cuts off allowing Moolah and Leilani to enter….why couldn’t they have done that all night to make it look like they weren’t standing next to each other. Moolah is wearing flamboyant glasses and Okerlund says don’t tell Ventura about them so he doesn’t get any ideas. Back to ringside for the match…..
Match 8

Wendi Richter (with Cyndi Lauper and David Wolfe) vs Leilani Kai (with Fabulous Moolah) for the WWF Womens Championship

Ironically this match was more hyped up than the previous 7 (Andre included) because of the involvement of Lauper on MTV. Richter had originally dethroned Moolah and Moolah trained Leilani to get the belt back, which she did. Richter, Wolfe and Lauper come running out to Girls Just Wanna Have Fun as the crowd goes crazy for the trio. Cyndi gets in Leilani’s face before the bell and Kai motions that she’s crazy, haha good one. I don’t know whether it was because I was a weird kid or not but when I first saw this match I thought Leilani was much more gorgeous than Wendi but Richter was the better wrestler. Monsoon says Cyndi stole her outfit out of Ventura’s dresser as we get underway with the big title match. They tie up and roll around the ropes before Leilani backs Wendi in the corner. Wendi punches Leilani halfway across the ring then hits an armdrag but Leilani nips Richter off her. Kai hits an armdrag but Wendi turns it into a hammerlock before THROWING her in hammerlock position a good 3 feet in the air, how Leilani didn’t tear a shoulder in the process I don’t know. Leilani reaches back and hits a series of snapmares as Cyndi shouts encouragement for Wendi. Leilani goes back to old school holds, a tribute to Moolah I’m sure.  They trade blows in the ring before Leilani grabs Wendi by the hair and throws her into the corner, then hits a snapmare before choking her down. Wendi applies a body scissors from sex position and Leilani shows how strong she is by pulling her all the way to her feet but Wendi hits a forearm to the chest. They appear to go for the same gut-wrench suplex but Wendi being taller falls forward into a lateral press for 1…2….nope. Leilani holds on to the hair then snapmares her over as Ventura speculates what its like to be on the receiving end of something like that. Kai throws Richter in the corner but a charge eats double boot then Wendi covers for a near fall. Leilani distracts the ref so Moolah chokes Wendi on the bottom rope before Cyndi runs over to save the day. Leilani whips Wendi off and hits a boot to the mid-section but Wendi rallies with a forearm and a New Delhi Devastator (and this is 1985 no less). Wendi splashes on top for 1….2..nope, near fall. Wendi whips Leilani into the corner where she goes for a splash but Kai gets the knees up in time. Leilani puts the boots to Wendi and hits a backbreaker for 1….2..NOOOO, that was close. Leilani hits a scoop slam then goes upstairs and hits a flying crossbody, but then Wendi rolls through it for 1….2……3 and we got a new WWF Women’s champion! Cyndi runs around and strangles Moolah with the towel before she trips getting into the ring. A funny spot that I find funny is Cyndi tries to pick up Wendi but can’t and Wendi picks up Cyndi effortlessly. They then do a dose-do dance as Girls Just Wanna Have Fun once again blares to the Madison Square Garden crowd.  Monsoon goes to the replay of the finish and speculates when Leilani came off the top she hit her head on the canvas allowing Wendi to roll on top……good explanation but anyways we got a new champion. I should point out this would be the last Women’s title change at a Wrestlemania for 16 years.

Time of match: 6:13

Winner: Wendi Richter by pinfall (New Women’s champion)

We go back to Mean Gene in the locker-room who interviews the new champ, where she says she beat “Leilani Cow”. Captain Lou makes his way into the picture as Gene asks “Did Moolah get in your way Cyndi?” Wendi “Are you crazy??” Cyndi “Yeah she’s bigger than me but I took care of her” before sending it to Howard Finkel in the ring. Fink turns things over to New York Yankees manager Billy Martin who is the special guest ring announcer. He gets a standing O from the crowd which is weird considering how many times he’s been hired and fired as manager. He then introduces Liberace as the special guest time-keeper (who dances a jig with the Rockettes in the ring) Billy then introduces the special guest referee Pat Patterson and special guest enforcer former world heavyweight boxing champion Muhammad Ali. Jose Torrez the former light-heavyweight champion leads Ali to the ring as the crowd gives a much deserved applause for the duo. Now its time for the main event……
Match 9

“Mr Wonderful” Paul Orndorff and “Rowdy” Roddy Piper (with Bob Orton) vs Mr T and Hulk Hogan (with Jimmy Snuka)

A Bagpipe band makes their way to the ring signaling the arrival of wrestling’s number one heel ROWDY…..RODDY….PIPER!!  The Rowdy one makes his entrance with Mr Wonderful and “Ace” Bob Orton. Not to nitpick, but couldn’t this have been a six man tag match since Snuka was equally as loved in the Garden as Hogan and Orton was Piper’s bodyguard…ah well, no use squawking about it now. Mr. T, Snuka and Hogan make their entrance to Eye of the Tiger as the Garden crowd goes nuts. They take FOREVER to start before Liberace stands and rings his custom made bell to start the main event. Hogan and Orndorff start and its well documented these 2 have not liked each other for a long time because of their childhood in Tampa where their high schools were football rivals or something to that extent. Orndorff teases going at it before tagging Piper in. Mr T hops up and down saying let me have him so Hogan tags him in. Piper made it clear on his DVD compilation he never liked Mr. T so this feud was more personal than it was business. Piper hated Mr T, Orndorff and Hogan hated each other so this maybe an out and out shoot by the end. Piper and T staredown nose to nose before they exchange slaps to the face before hitting a go-behind takedown. T tries to sit-out/turn in but Piper maintains the ride. Mr T finally switches out of it as Orndorff fires up Piper in their corner. Mr T puts Piper into a fireman’s carry then drops him like yesterday’s newspaper (Monsoon’s words not mine). Piper backs T into his corner where Orndorff gets in then a melee ensues when all 4 men brawl into the corner. Muhammad Ali and Bob Orton get in the ring as Snuka goes upstairs. Ali throws a punch that sends Piper out of the ring then takes a swing at Orton who retreats to the ground. The heels regroup outside as the camera shows Billy Martin laughing his ass off at the proceedings. Piper motions that they’re outta here as Monsoon scoffs and the heels actually leave the area. Patterson counts up to 8 before Hogan stops him and motions for them to come back and the heels in fact do walk back to ringside. Piper and Paul get in the ring to attack Mr T and Hogan but the faces clean house. They hit a double noggin knocker on the heels before Hogan clotheslines Roddy in the corner. Hulk hits a knoggin knocker on Piper and Orndorff before hitting an atomic drop on the rowdy one. Piper and Hogan trade blows before Hulk makes the tag to Mr T then they hit a double clotheslines. T hits a scoop slam on Piper and an arm-drag on an interfering Orndorff. T hits another slam on Piper and headbutts Orndorff before ramming Piper’s head into Hogan’s knee. Make no mistake about it, in terms of physical condition Mr T has the physique that is better than half the WWF roster so had he went into wrestling, he couldn’t have been any worse than anybody the AWA put out in the late 80’s. Hogan rakes the eyes and big boots Piper over the top rope to the floor. Mr Wonderful interferes and clotheslines Hogan out of the ring so Piper grabs a chair and waffles the Hulkster with it. Muhammad Ali chases Piper back in the ring but Orndorff sneaks out and throws Hogan into the ring. Piper puts the boots to Hogan as Orndorff sneaks in a cheap shot of his own. Mr T interferes so Piper and Orndorff double team the Hulkster. Piper and Orndorff execute a double atomic drop on Hogan as Muhammad Ali gets in the ring to chase Piper out. Fans may not be pleased with Ali’s constant interference but from a kayfabe standpoint he’s supposed to be the enforcer and that’s exactly what he’s doing. Patterson has to beg Ali to get out as Orndorff works over Hulk. Orndorff hits a snap suplex as Ventura says he’s the x-factor of this match being the most technically gifted of all 4 men involved…..well 6 including Snuka and Orton outside. Piper tags in and hits windup punches then a knee lift for 1…2..nope, Hogan kicks out. Piper holds Hogan as Paul tags in and hits a forearm to the back of the neck…..One of the unwritten laws of wrestling is not to hit moves on the back of the neck because you’re more prone to actual injuries, but Orndorff would ROUTINELY do this to Hogan in their matches, pissing off the Hulkster legitimately in the process. Paul covers for a near-fall before hitting a nice backbreaker before going upstairs. Orndorff goes for another forearm off the top but misses, before Hogan makes the hot tag to Mr T. T cleans house before Orndorff is able to take him down. Mr T and Orndorff go high school style as Mr T goes for a roll but Paul wizzers to make sure that doesn’t happen. Piper makes the tag then hits a front headlock on B.A. Barabus before T tags Hogan in.  Both heels interfere so Hogan hits a double noggin knocker on them then headlock punches Orndorff until Wonderful counters with a back suplex. Piper interferes but Patterson cuts him off so both Jimmy Snuka and Cowboy Bob get in the ring. Snuka hits a jumping headbutt that sends Orton over the top to the apron. Patterson is distracted by Snuka as Orndorff puts Hogan in a full nelson. Piper and Mr. T go at it as Patterson turns his attention to him as Orton goes upstairs. Orton comes off the top but Hogan moves and Ace catches Orndorff in the back of the head with the cast. Hogan covers as Snuka roughs up Orton and Patterson gets in position..1……2…..3….its overrrrrrrr!!!!  The ring becomes chaos as everyone gets in the ring before Piper knocks out Patterson, spits at Orndorff and takes off with Orton in tow. Back inside Mr T tends to Orndoff as Billy Martin announce Hogan and Mr T the winner. Orndorff springs to life as Snuka, T, Patterson and Hogan back off. The faces celebrate in the ring as Orndorff doesn’t have a clue what happened before heading to the locker-room. Hogan, Mr. T, Muhammad Ali, Pat Patterson, Snuka, Liberace and Billy Martin all pose and celebrate in the ring. Monsoon and Ventura go to the instant replay before sending it back to Mean Gene to interview the winners. Mr T says he trained hard,as Hogan shills Snuka and T before Superfly does the same thing.  Back to Monsoon and Ventura who sign off and thanks the fans for tuning in.

Time of match: 13:21
Winners: Mr T and Hulk Hogan by pinfall

From an in ring standpoint this was on par with a lot of WWF action from 1985 and historically it did great numbers on closed circuit television. WWF was taking over the country and this would be the greatest year in wrestling (until 1998) for the AWA had their second wind after losing virtually their entire roster to McMahon, the NWA was awesome with the Horsemen against Rhodes and Magnum and of course WWF’s Rock n Wrestling was a big seller. This was more of a modern day crash event with only 2 matches going over 10 minutes but that’s basically how long WWF stars could go and still be entertaining. If you’re looking for an in-ring classic ppv like Great American Bash 96 don’t bother, but if you want a drama filled time capsule of fun then definitely get your hands on this priceless classic. Seriously, whoever was old enough to remember what wrestling was like during this time period can agree that this was ground breaking. The next tape after this in terms of Coliseum Video releases is WWF’s MOST UNUSUAL MATCHES. As for this one, 4 stars out of 5 for the significance and a point off for the crash style. Some of them deserved to be longer.

Bloopers, Bleeps and Bodyslams (WF001)

WWF’s Bloopers, Bleeps and Bodyslams (WF001)

The one that started it all. Today there are nearly 700 tapes and DVD’s put out by WWF/E home video with material dating as far back as the 1960’s. Back in the 80’s VCR’s were sweeping the nation and Vince McMahon made the genius decision to capitalize on them by releasing a line of home videos, something new in wrestling. In 1985, he would release his product on both Betamax (think 8 tracks but for tapes) and VHS. The very first one was titled Bloopers, Bleeps and Bodyslams and it was more or less a compilation tape of all the silly stuff that the WWF was capable of. I am unsure of the actual release date but since most of the action is from 1984 and earlier plus the tape was released before the first Wrestlemania, I’d venture a guess to say early 1985. Before I continue, that seems pretty ballsy doesn’t it? You need to hit a home run in order for fans to continue to purchase your product, then instead of presenting blow away matches/hot feuds, you begin with TNT (Tuesday Night Titans) skits and goofy moments? Anyway let’s get to it. The tape opens with a really cool intro video that comprises of the history of coliseum wrestling (the Roman one that is) before showing highlights of modern day WWF action set to a cool brass (trumpets and trombones for non music fans reading this) theme.

Gorilla Monsoon welcomes us and shills the upcoming action. He even pokes fun at himself as they show an outtake of his opening speech plus play it backwards. Then we get a short clip where on Piper’s Pit, Roddy Piper asks to compare hands with Andre the Giant. Andre says sure and slaps him upside the head. Cut to a short clip of a 10 men tag match at the Philadelphia Spectrum where one team consists of Jimmy Snuka (in the ring), Andre, Rocky Johnson, Pedro Morales and Salvatore Bellomo against Don Muraco (in the ring), “Superstar” Billy Graham, “Playboy” Buddy Rose, Ray “Crippler” Stevens and Mr. Fuji. Snuka goes to town on Muraco before tagging in Morales, Morales floors Don with a forearm to the chest and revs up the crowd before tagging in Andre. Andre shoots Muraco in the ropes then delivers a big boot that sends Don over the top rope to the floor. Stevens and Rose come over to help him back in and once inside, Muraco locks in a headlock on the giant who gets sent off the ropes and runs into the huge posterior of Andre. Muraco sells it like he took a cannon shot to the ribs. Muraco staggers to his corner and puts his hand up, Rose refuses to tag in but Stevens reluctantly does. Even though this is a short segment, its always nice to see the original “crippler” in Stevens on a WWF tape no less. He made his name in the 70’s with the AWA as half of a great tag team with Nick Bockwinkel managed by a young Bobby Heenan. Turns out the segment ends right there,

We cut to one of my favorite segments of all-time, love advice from “Classy” Freddie Blassie on Tuesday Night Titans. Before I go any further let me explain what Tuesday Night Titans was. Most wrestling shows from that era, especially the territorial ones were one sided squash matches with an occasional main event tossed in there while hyping up some house show that was coming up that Friday or whatever. Vince thought that kind of shit put fans to sleep and decided to come up with something new. Basically he completely ripped off Johnny Carson’s Tonight Show by having himself in the Carson chair with Alfred Hays playing the role of Ed McMahon (no relation to Vince). Instead of presenting wrestling matches, the show featured WWF stars doing interviews, performing in skits and doing off the wall things not seen in wrestling before. Sure it was hokey and silly but it was also revolutionary because it added to the characters of all those involved, good or bad. As Ric Flair once said, Vince couldn’t match the NWA talent for talent so he had to match with larger than life characters such as Hulk Hogan, George “The Animal” Steele and “Rowdy” Roddy Piper. Back to the segment, Blassie admitted in his book he and Vince Jr used to ride together because they had a lot in common including love of fast cars and loud outfits. Here Vince is in a nice suit while Blassie is in his usual lavish pink suit. Vince “Freddie you’ve always been willing to help individuals with problems.” Freddie “A lot of pencil neck geeks around here have a lot of problems, I’ll guarantee you that.” The first letter comes from a woman who claims her husband pays no attention to her until after TNT is over (nice plug). Freddie “He doesn’t pay attention to her huh? Has the woman tried taking a bath? Has she used under arm deodorant? Has she shaved her armpits, her legs? Ya goofy broad that’s what ya gotta do!” Vince tries to say the problem is TNT and Freddie counters “Maybe the sheets are dirty.” Next question has a woman that complains that her husband is performing moves on her after watching WWF. Do Not Try This At Home didn’t debut for over a decade so fans had carte blanche to do what they wanted back then. Vince “His superfly Snuka leap off the top of the dresser is too much.” At this point Freddie, Vince and the cameraman all break character briefly to laugh at the hilariousness of that statement. “What about practicing holds on her, Mr. Blassie?” Freddie “Oh yeah, my second wife I used to practice strangleholds on her all the time.” Vince starts laughing for real. Freddie “Some of these broads need to be kicked around.” He spits on the floor as Vince tries to go back in babyface announcer mode “Mr Blassie please.” Freddie “Ya know I used to write a column for Hollywood News Gazette! I taught that dear Aby (he says A-Bee) and Ann Flanders! Don’t ya know anything?” Next letter Vince laughs as he reads a 60 year old woman has limited experience with men but has nice legs, a firm waist and a burning desire to date a wrestler. Vince asks Freddie if he has any suggestions on who to date buts cuts him off saying she’s 60. Freddie was no stranger to women at his advancing age so he says age doesn’t matter. Vince asks him if he has any wrestlers in mind willing to date a 60 year old and Blassie lists Sgt Slaughter, Tito Santana, Hulk Hogan and Tonga Kid. Vince scoffs saying Tonga Kid is only 18 years old and Blassie’s response “Good, he’s got a lot of life in him. It’ll be good for the old lady!” The camera man starts laughing again as the segment ends right there. I could watch those two in that capacity all day but its time to move on.

Monsoon rejoins us for a vanity segment, huh? Monsoon talks about hair loss and how it affects wrestlers. We cut to a squash match where “Iron” Mike Sharpe (with Lou Albano outside) beats on jobber Steve Grey. Sharpe grabs Grey by the hair and rams his head on the buckle which such force, Grey’s hair falls off. He was wearing a toupee inside the ring, smart huh? Sharpe throws Grey to the outside and taunts him with his own hairpiece as the segment ends there before Captain Lou has a chance to pound on the poor, bald jobber.

Next we go to a TNT segment where Freddie Blassie tries to hype up Tiger Chung Lee as a badass by having him break breaks with karate chops. Only problem is Lee can’t break anything. Vince turns his back and laughs as even Blassie tries to save face by uttering gibberish (he claimed in his book that back then managers had to at least pretend they knew the language of their wrestler) as Lee continues to struggle to break the bricks. Monsoon claims he bought the bricks himself and had them loaded with steel but the fact was Lee was exposed as a fraud on national television. No wonder he didn’t last.

Next up is Captain Lou Albano. Monsoon refers to him as the greatest walking advertisement for birth control. We go to a segment on TNT where Vince is wearing a piss-yellow suit while Lou rants and raves in his Hawaiian shirt. Lou claims he’s got an IQ of 901.73. At this point I realize if I quote everything this review will take forever so from here on I’ll quote only the funniest while giving a brief synopsis of the segments.

We go to a posedown held in what looks to be a lounge between Paul Orndorff and Tony Atlas. Vince is your MC wearing a red suit sitting at a table with Renee Goulet who is sipping a cocktail and looking bored. Atlas poses first to the Coliseum Video theme before Orndorff comes out and poses to the same theme. Both have killer physiques but Atlas gets the duke due to being a babyface. Paul protests then clobbers Atlas in the back, sending him crashing into what appears to be The Spoiler’s table. A tall guy in a mask tries to break apart Orndorff and Atlas and just for namesake I’ll call him The Spoiler. Spoiler and Vince lead Orndorff out the side door while Atlas stands there flustered.

Monsoon says life on the road can be lonely and sends us to Iron Sheik’s haram party on TNT with Vince hosting in the gray suit. Sheik stands by an actual live camel wearing his actual 1971 AAU wrestling champion medal he won in the 180 pound division as well as his turban and loud shirt. The one hilarious quote is he claims the camel is better looking than Sgt Slaughter. Alfred Hays is brought in to analyze the animal as Sheik continues to run down Slaughter. Vince makes a goof and both he and Sheik laugh at Vince’s expense before Sheik continues to rant. Vince asks Sheik what the camels name is and at first he speaks a long name in farci. Vince asks for the translation and Sheik answers “Claude”. All 3 men share a laugh which makes me laugh because Sheik’s supposed to be a heel yet everyone’s having fun here. Vince notices Alfred standing by the camel’s ass and asks if there’s any action back there. To save time I’ll skip the rest and move on.

Monsoon blows the ending of the next segment which has Freddie Blassie, Friday (the original Kim Chee) and a dancing chicken on TNT, yes of course I’m serious. Vince is wearing the beige suit as Blassie is in his blue sequined suit. The camera pans to the chicken just as it takes a shit, which adds to the hilarity. Vince notices and lets Blassie know. Kamala comes out to check out the chicken as Vince asks what’s going on. Freddie announces that the chicken will perform a disappearing act as Kamala will eat him alive, causing Vince to protest. Kamala goes after the chicken and the camera cuts away only to return to Kamala eating an obviously cooked chicken. I’m sure Vince used the camera cut to get the real chicken out of there before PETA showed up.

Monsoon cuts to an actual wrestling match for once….only its midgets. The Haiti Kid takes on Danny Carpenter in a hilarious midget match. I say it’s hilarious because back then it was legitimately funny before the antics became redundant in the following 10 years.

Ivan Putski teaches women and Vince (wearing a gray plaid overcoat and blue pants) how to polka. Vince may or may not be dancing with Linda, it kind of looks like her but I’m not sure. Either way they’re all having a merry ol time with a legitimate polka band performing in the back. The Crusher and Dick The Bruiser should be there but they’re in the AWA and couldn’t make it.

WWF champion Hulk Hogan finally makes his (and shockingly only) appearance on the August 24, 1984 edition of Tuesday Night Titans making protein shakes for Vince and Alfred to try. Vince tries it and he likes it but when “Awful” Alfred tries it, he promptly throws up. Next!

Back to TNT where it’s Captain Lou’s turn to give love advice. The first letter says her husband is from the old world and doesn’t wear deodorant, which stinks her out. Lou says that’s fine and what she has to do is mix rubbing alcohol, olive oil, witch hazel and shaving lotion then rub it on him to get rid of the stench. Lou says he doesn’t wear deodorant because he doesn’t smell then laughs at himself. Heh, couldn’t even keep a straight face on that one. If you notice a pattern developing is that nobody is taking any of this shit seriously. Heels and faces alike are laughing at themselves and even Vince is laughing along with them rather than at them. The next letter says her husband is too fat and Albano says he can’t stand fat people. Vince asks what he classifies himself as and Lou claims he’s not fat, its an optical illusion. Lou then rants about fat people which I can’t type out to give the rant true justice, have to see it to appreciate it. The next letter says her husband never takes her cowboy boots off and Lou says he’s going to give the Aerosol companies a lot of business.

Cut to Afa and Sika, former 3 time WWF tag team champions The Wild Samoans who’s cooking up quite a feast for Vince and Alfred. Alfred compares the odor of the cooking to the bubonic plague. Vince asks what’s cookin’ and the Samoans answer in their native tongue. They then bring out a huge mackerel, analyze it then put it in the cooking pot. Alfred comes over and is grossed out as they dissect a squid or something. Vince asks the Samoans to offer a sample to Alfred who reluctantly takes a bite. His facial expression says it all. Back on the set, Afa and Sika enjoy their meal as Alfred and Vince wonder what exactly they are eating. Vince orders Alfred to get the recipe for the home viewers later.

Monsoon shills the next segment as the most hilarious blooper. The famous WWF tag team championship match between “Soulman” Rocky Johnson and “Mr USA” Tony Atlas vs The Wild Samoans on November 15, 1983. Finally some wrestling. To keep this review short the blooper is the ref takes a bump which has Lou Albano interfering with a wooden chair. He goes to clock Atlas with it but Tony moves and Afa takes the chair to the head, which gets stuck on him as he falls backward. Atlas makes the cover as the ref revives and Johnson/Atlas are your new champions. Watching in a New York bar that night was an 18 year old college freshman named Mick Foley. Also watching was Rocky Johnson’s 11 year old son Dwayne. Wonder what became of Mick and Dwayne…. Anyway, we go to another TNT segment where Vince questions Lou about what went down during the tag match. Albano blames the Samoans and not himself for costing them the match, ha.

Salvatore Bellomo makes an appearance on TNT to cook pizza for Vince and Alfred. Again, Salvatore was a bonafide jobber to the heels in his WWF career but he was featured on these shows to at least attempt to get him over. This was the one thing the AWA and NWA lacked because their mid-carders were told to keep their mouths shut and do what they were told while WWF guys were told to do whatever the heck they wanted in order to get over and draw money. Anyway Bellomo, Vince and Alfred don ridiculous chefs hats as Salvatore prepares the pizza. Vince “There’s a bit of powder on your nose Alfred, not the first time I’ve seen THAT.” Holy shit that was cutting edge and this was 1984!

Now we go to former tag team champions Adrian Adonis and Dick Murdoch on a road trip for the September 25, 1984 Tuesday Night Titans. This was an interesting combination as Dick was the redneck rebel from Texas while Adonis was the New York street thug. They visit the Texas ranches first with Adonis attempting to get on a horse only to fall off. Then “Mean” Gene Okerlund joins Adonis (wearing a Nike t-shirt) and Murdoch as they walk the streets of New York City. Adrian runs into “old friends” hanging out before showing an open fire hydrant and saying that’s his old shower. A mangy red dog shows up and Adonis plays with it as Dick marvels at the city. The trio stops by a hot dog stand where lunch is on Adrian. Okerlund asks the vendor what kind of dogs they are and the vendor clearly can’t speak English. Murdoch orders a dog with mustard on it and takes a bite, he liked it apparently. He then shoves it into Adrian’s mouth who mumbles before Okerlund says time to go and he’s not picking up the tab. Cheapskate!

Monsoon then shows us a highlight package which is just the opening montage out of order with a flew other clips thrown in. Least they tried to something a little different.

Now it’s “Luscious” Johnny Valiant’s turn for love advice on TNT. The first letter says that her husband’s physique pales in comparison to WWF wrestlers and she has no idea what to do. Johnny V at first misunderstands the phrase but then says “Quit lookin over your guys shoulder. Quit lookin at the guy cutting the grass or the guy hitchhiking on the turnpike!” Next letter is from a guy who says he put a wrestling mask on his wife during playtime and it made things better. Johnny “Depending on who I was with I woulda done that myself!” The next letter is from a rich, attractive woman who has a fetish for ugly men (who the hell wrote THAT one?) and asks if any WWF superstar matches the criteria. Johnny answers Hulk Hogan and hypes up Brutus Beefcake as the ultimate ladies man. V then rattles off Tito Santana, Junkyard Dog and Sgt Slaughter as uglies and makes the comment “I heard that Slaughter wrote to the lonely hearts club and he got a letter back saying they weren’t THAT lonely”. The next letter is a guy who has a fantasy of being in a 16-20 man battle royal. Johnny asks what kind of health insurance the guy has for wanting to be in such a dangerous environment. He gets cut off as we go back to Monsoon.
Next up is Andre The Giant who cracks a joke comparing “Big” John Studd to Sky Low Low (the midget legend) and then reveals all his clothes are custom made in Japan except his boots which come from Texas. Andre then covers Alfred’s head with his hand to show how massive he is. Andre then sings The Fish Song which he picked up on his last tour in Japan. He’s got a legit reggae band as he pretends to swim like a fish.

Roddy Piper makes his appearance and he’s got Captain Lou with him on Piper’s Pit. Lou marvels at the gold record Girls Just Wanna Have Fun turned into then promises to bring Cindy Lauper on a future episode of the Pit. The scene cuts to Cindy on the set where Lou comes in and takes credit for all her success, which pisses her off. Lou tells her to shut up and says all women are slime. Piper backs up Albano and they both get in her face. Lou calls her a broad and she flips, literally, flipping over the table then attacking Lou and Piper. David Wolff himself runs out to save Cindy. The fact Lou was the one who began the Rock N Wrestling Connection cannot be overstated. For those that don’t know, Albano and Cindy Lauper just happened to be riding on the same plane together and from that, they struck up a friendship. This included Albano making a cameo in Lauper’s famous video Girls Just Wanna Have Fun as her “father”. What this led to was a WWF/MTV crossover that drew A LOT of money. Sure Hogan ruled the wrestling world in 1984 but he didn’t have the proper mainstream appeal until he appeared with the others on MTV in 1985. When MTV aired Brawl To End It All and War To Settle The Score, now WWF were pulling in casual fans as well as wrestling fans. So now with Piper established as MTV and WWF’s number one heel, the first Wrestlemania came to fruition. All this because Captain Lou just happened to be on a plane with Cindy.

Another “bodyslams” montage only they use the orchestral ending theme from the end of the early Coliseum Videos.

Up last was a legendary, lengthy segment where Paul “Butcher” Vachon’s wedding would be televised. The recently departed Maurice “Mad Dog” Vachon was an AWA legend and a certifiable mad man in the business. His younger brother Paul was equally insane and the duo ran roughshod over Canadian and American territories in the 60’s and 70’s. It should be noted that legendary women’s wrestler Luna Vachon is actually Paul’s adopted daughter, not Mad Dog’s. The segment begins with Vince interviewing a fan outside and asking what the woman looks like if she’s going to marry Butcher, the fan points to his dog which makes Vince laugh. Inside the reception is nearly every heel on the roster with Vince and Alfred hosting. I see Afa, Sika, Junior (Afa’s 19 year old son who would eventually become Headshrinker Fatu, The Sultan and Rikishi), George Steele, Fabulous Moolah, Jesse “The Body” Ventura, “Dr D” Dave Schultz, Sky Low Low, Howard Finkel, Freddie Blassie and Lou Albano all enjoying the festivities. We start with the gift opening and the first one is a box of rubber bands graciously donated by Captain Lou. The next give is a pair of glasses donated by Freddie Blassie who runs down Paul saying the ring on her finger was the same one on the first 5 wives he’s had (a lie but a hilarious one). “Why don’t ya buy her some real diamonds ya cheapskate!” Vince looks around for someone to make a toast and he settles on George “The Animal” Steele. Figures, the one guy who couldn’t talk. The heel cheers him on and after working the crowd he shouts “perpendicular!!” as Albano cheers. Vince looks disgusted as Albano grabs the mic and starts ranting and raving. Albano shills his Samoan stable then toasts “Open your teeth, open your gums, lookout stomach here it comes!” Vince goes to interview Howard but Albano comes over again “I got a girl who lives on a hill, she won’t but her sister will!” The Body wants to say a few words “The scum always rises to the top of the water.” Ooooook. Sky Low Low is next. He basically runs down Albano for talking too much and says “What the hell do you want, a toaster?” The French Canadian born Sky Low Low was one of the best midget wrestlers ever with a physique second to none. Most midgets didn’t live past 50 and he was 56 at the time of this wedding to give an idea how good a shape he was in. Albano swears at him in Italian as Low Low fires back in his French much to Sika’s delight. Blassie comes over to antagonize Low Low before things get settled. Vince goes over to “Dr. D” Dave Schultz who is bleeped out while running down everyone in the room. Guess he must have said something more suitable for the Attitude Era. Paul and his wife dance by themselves as Albano continuously burps into the microphone causing Ventura to crack up. Albano then goes over to sing a few bars before removing his shirt much to Vince’s disgust. George kisses Paul much to his dismay. Albano then threatens to moon Vince who tells the camera to cut away. Once action resumes the wife is dancing with Low Low…and pretty good too. Albano counters by dancing with Low Low’s date/gf/wife/whatever then Mad Dog gets on the dance floor with Moolah. The dancing of Albano and the midget lady causes Blassie to crack up laughing. Next, Albano and the Samoans attempt to sing before bringing Low Low to sing with them. Fatu looks to be having a blast as Albano pours what’s left of his beer can down the back of Low Low’s pants. We then cut to the dessert where the wife refuses to eat the customary first piece of cake so a grumpy Dr. D shows up and shoves a pie in her face. Albano then nails Low Low in the head with a pie as Paul laughs at the display of slapstick. A pie fight develops with Alfred getting nailed by Dr D. Schultz nails Vince himself in the face. Vince grabs a pie and nails George Steele with it. A slapstick pie fight envelops with champagne being sprayed as well. Blassie appears to have survived the pies but a sneaky Ventura dumps a can of something on him. That was something else and a lot of fun to watch.

We end the tape with two montages, one of what we just saw and the second being the customary ending orchestral theme. Before we sign off we get a previews for BEST OF THE WWF VOLUME 2, ANDRE THE GIANT and MOST UNUSUAL MATCHES…..guess the first 4 tapes (including this one) were released together and those 3 were released together as well. As for this….wow. What a way to make your debut huh? As a standalone tape I thought it was entertaining. Remember this was the beginning of Vince Jr’s takeover of the wrestling world which added entertainment on top of wrestling. I’ll say this though; most of the skits were fun to watch especially with ¾ of the tape involving the heels. Not only that but Hogan only appeared briefly and he was the world champion. If you’re looking for important, blow away matches then look elsewhere. If you’re looking to have 70 minutes of fun then this one’s for you. I’ll give it 4 out of 5 stars just because it was an outrageous way to make your home video debut. A point off for the simple fact it’s a bloopers tape with little in ring action. The next tape in line is HULKAMANIA so we’ll pick up there.